I Miss Him So...

[laquinn]

Well I have finally gotten home from work (a very long day 16 hours).Where I work planed a wine and dine for Valentines and I helped with the planning it was hard to do but I just did it at my pace. I dipped strawberrys and then of cource I had to cook do over 30 steak dinners. I was thinking about all the couples in the dinning room waiting and that kinda bothered me. What was nice was my 2 boys and their wives and my brother and his wife were there and I went and talked to them and my brother gave me one of the biggest hugs that I have had in awhile. He knew it was hard for me. 

I went to the cemetary took out roses I hate going out there only because everytime I do it just makes it seem more real that he is not here with me. And now that I have had time to sit it's all starting to hit and the tears are flowing.

One more holiday down. Hope everyone else got through it ok.

Going to bed Lela 

[missyouhoney811]

[align=left]Hi everyone.  I got back from Naples Florida on Monday.  I had a wonderful visit with my sister and brother-in-law.  Although, the weather was not the normal sunny Florida I did have alot of fun.  I did my beach walk daily 4 to 6 miles.  I can't wait until I can return to my regular routine of Zumba.  I have another procedure that has to be taken care of at the hospital on Tuesday.......they have to do a cold knife v-cone biopsy.  Say some prayers and light the candles for me.  Needless, to say once again my trip for Vegas had to be cancelled.  After being put under on Tuesday I can't see that I would be ready to go up, up and away.  So, I am putting it off until I get the test results back......Life changes daily as we all know too well.

I went to the cemetery on Wednesday (2/11) 30 months for John.  I released my three balloons and put flowers on John's grave.  I also tied a heart balloon to the flowers.  No tears.  I just spent time talking to him of course I do the same thing at home.  That has not changed at all.

I did something funny and completely out of my character.  E-Harmony was offering a free 3 day find your mate lol.........so I signed up.  I am not looking but it did keep me busy and gave me quite a bit of laughter on happy hearts day.  I used it as therapy.....there are sooooooo many lonely people looking for their soul mate......

Blessings

[/align]

[rodless]

At least happy heart day is out of the way and the sun is shining today. Small blessings. The dog and I walked for an hour in the cemetery and that felt good.

I knew all of you would understand what I meant about being restless. Sometimes I think selling my house and setting up somewhere else even still in town here would help me realize this part of my life is over. It was the only place Rod and I lived together. We bought it right before we got married and he loved puttering and fixing and having a home again after years of living in a trailer.

Economy and my age makes it tough to consider any big changes like a different job or location. I have great benefits, a decent working situation and hopefully am within 10 yrs. of retirement. I am really very grateful for all that but like I said right now I'm just unsettled.

Linda, I get it about the car. When I traded in my 12yr. old Camry, I cried and cried. It was Rod's and my favorite car ever and held lots of memories of trips and good times. Would have loved to wave a magic wand and make it new again.

Got an email showing my son's wedding invitation today. Kinda hit me hard when I see her parents, my ex and his wife listed and then my name alone. I want to tell them to put Rod on there so I can be a couple too but I hate seeing the phrase "the late." He's not late. He's gone.

Hope all of you have a good week.

Mary Jo

[airymoon]

dorothy  what is the biopsy for? There is nothing wrong with being on e harmony. I played around with it for a little while before too. I am atoying with the idea of going back on plent of fish dating site. I am not looking or want to date but i figure it cant hurt to talk on line and make new friends. We could all use more good friends right? Just have fun and dont take it too seriously.

becky

[aprilmoonflower]

Hey Ladies..I've been busy getting settled here n MA. Just catching up. Hope everyone is well. I am just past 41 months. Oh how time changes things and yet things still stay the same too..

Sending you positive thoughts Dorothy!

[armaiti]

Tomorrow will be the 13th anniversary of when Ishaq and I first got together.  I'm not sure what I'm planning on...I know if the weather is good I'll head up into the hills for some time walking and sitting where we often hiked and swam.  It's hard to believe it was thirteen years ago we fell in love.  I miss him every day, and I still love him just as much as I did before he crossed over.

Blessings,

Anna

[airymoon]

ill be thinking of you anna

[aprilmoonflower]

((hugs)) Anna. I hope you have a peaceful day.

I am just getting settled again here in MA. We will be moving again soon so just looking for the right place currently. Also working on my writing. Kids keeping me busy otherwise. My oldest turns 5 next month and we will officially be starting homeschool curriculum. I'm so glad the new man is down with homeschool! He works from home so it works out wonderful that we are all home (for the most part) everyday! I feel like we are creating strong family bonds which is nice after being alone for so long. I do miss living alone though! lol. I know that is a weird thing to write but I think some of you might understand it too.

[armaiti]

I had a pretty calm day...went for a hike up in the hills.  I wrote this poem for Ishaq and though I'd post it here.  The picture was taken by my dear friend who came up the day after Ishaq passed and helped me dress him and do ritual.  It was taken just two weeks before his passing, while we were at the Oregon Country Fair (I was playing the Gypsy Stage with the belly dance band, so I'm all dressed up for that).  It's the only picture I have of us kissing, and I'm so glad she took the picture. 

I thought a lot about gratitude today.  I am so grateful that we actual got together, and I found him, even if we only had ten and a half years with him in a body on this earth.  It sure beats not finding your true love at all, as I know so many have not.  And I know I'll be with him again, so that's a comfort.

Blessings,

Anna

For Ishaq On Our 13th Anniversary

I sit by the river and watch the water flow.

It is like time, a river that will eventually carry me to you.

But for now, it goes past, and I sit on the shore and watch.

I feel the warmth of the sun,

and the dampness of the stones I'm sitting on.

Sometimes I feel frozen in time, and that if I turn my head

you'll be there, smiling at me.

And why not? You're always part of me anyway now, whether in dreams

or in the little heart shaped stones you still scatter in my path.

There is this: the gratitude that we had those years together walking together

on this green earth.

And the gratitude that we will walk together again.

So many adventures, discoveries, songs and stories.

And so many more to know, in whatever lives come to us next time.

There is this belief of some about moving on...

that when your beloved leaves their body

You go on, and they fall behind.

But that's not true, as you have shown me

We are still walking side by side,

just in two different forms.

You have become the winged one who flies between the dimensions

Shapeshifting in your own unique way.

while I sit by the river, and listen to your voice in its song,

and feel your embrace in the wind as it stirs the dry leaves

and writes poems in the ripples on the water.

- Anna Armaiti

February 18, 2009

[aprilmoonflower]

Anna- that's a beautiful poem. I'm glad you had a peaceful day.

[missingcurtis]

Anna,

I just read your poem.  I read it to myself outloud.  I like to read things like that outloud, maybe I am also reading it to Curtis.  His picture is there, over my right shoulder. 

I, too, wonder about moving on.  In the 3 years that have passed, I can tell that my emotions are more under control.  But as much as I hate living alone and being alone all the time, I don't think I could ever have the same love as I did before.

I hope you are having a peaceful Sunday afternoon and that the sun is shinning on your today.

Debbie.................Missing Curtis

[aprilmoonflower]

Where is everyone??????

First day of spring is less than a month away!

[rodless]

This has been a rotten week. The children's librarian on staff passed away Wednesday from a sudden heart attack. She was a good friend and a great colleague. Not only are we dealing with a very sad small town public - especially kids- we have a lot of pieces to put together for job responsibilities. And since she was a packrat to the nth degree, I have closets, cupboards and drawers to deal with. A good lesson in looking around and visualizing what others would have to do to clean up my life especially in a work situation....although I'm pretty much a neatnik so it shouldn't be too bad. I'm looking ahead to a lot of work hours.

Mary Jo

[missyouhoney811]

I had my procedure last Tuesday (COLD, KNIFE V-CONE BIOPOSY).  Although, I do not have the results I must think positive.  I have been so sick with some sort of bug which I probably picked up at the hospital from all the germs floating around.  Today, I feel as if I am getting back to being normal whatever that is.....I plan on picking up my food at Jenny Craig and possibly going to ZUMBA tomorrow night.  I need the heat and flowers to make me feel better and happy.  Why I stay in PA is beyond me....this is the year I move....must find the right direction to go in....

I made my reservations once again for Vegas.  Hope to God nothing changes my plans.  Ever since that ass t-boned me my way of life has not been under my control.  Because of some idiot that should be used as land fill.......instead we take care of him in jail.....I will never understand our justice system.  I believe we should punish people but instead we pamper them..their rights HA

enough for that...............I go to Vegas on 3/24 and return 3/27...........the invite is still there..........the Venetian is giving me two suites........first time for that.....they must really being hurting......

Blessings to all....

Dorothy

[rodless]

Anna, I forgot to say how much I liked your poem. I think you speak for a lot of us with what you expressed.

This is one of those times I really miss Rod. He was always my sounding board when I had work related problems and knew how to get my mind off of them and calm me down...it usually involved a short trip to a local bar or a back rub etc.....some nice memories! I miss being able to go home, spout off and then have a hug and listen to him laugh. I'm REALLY missing the laugh these days. I try to remember it, sometimes it comes clearly, others not at all. This all sucks.

Mary Jo

[armaiti]

Mary Jo, I'm sorry you are having a tough week.  I was remembering Ishaq's best friend yesterday, which was the 2nd anniversary of when his girlfriend died from a brain tumor.  Another woman who was part of our Oregon Country Fair booth died from cancer recently, and I'm going to a memorial for her next week.   And a good friend's daughter's friend died recently of a heroin overdose, and he was just in his early twenties.  There's sure a lot of death and sadness going around. 

I had a dream with Ishaq night before last.  It was really good to see him.  Then he told me he had to get back to work - he said he greets those who are coming over to the other side, and that there are always a lot coming over.  Somehow, I'm not surprised he's doing that!

Dorothy, I sure hope you can get to Vegas and to Zumba!  And I do want to meet you there someday, when my financial situation is more stable.  I'd still like to see Vegas someday! 

Hope everyone else is doing ok,

Blessings,

Anna

[lindat]

Anna,  your poem was so beautiful.

MJ,  I guess one of the few things we have learned is if you wait awhile things become more bearable - doesn't help much at the time though.  I hope that time comes for you sooner rather than later....

Dorothy, you continue to inspire me   I love your upbeat way of looking at the world and the future.   My prayers are in for a positive outcome.

Vacation has been all that I hoped it would be and more.  Just being away from the snow has given me a new perspective - mostly because I can walk everyday.   Jim is doing well and we seem to be more able to communicate without tension.  He will be starting radiation in a few weeks, but has a positive attitude about it.   Not sure what life will bring, but on to the new chapters!!!  Starting school in the fall has given me so much to look forward to, I am so excited. 

Michele, hope you are doing well.

Love you guys, hope you have a peaceful day!

[aprilmoonflower]

Linda- what are you going to be studying? I am so excited for you! I am also really jealous you are enjoying warm weather! but you deserve it!

I know I am not doing well with winter. I remember exactly why I moved out of the NE again! I doubt I will stay in the area more than 2-3 years tops. lol. sometimes I feel like I should just go back to AZ. (and I only just moved here!) I am absolutley miserable during winter though. it's awful! I am working on it and trying to accept it, but I really think I have seasonal depression. I just loathe the snow and cold and not sure why I am here! The new man is why though!

Dorothy- I will be thinking positive thoughts! I'm sorry you have has such a hard time recovering from your accident. that's awful!

Mary Jo- that sucks. I hope you can get through it without much stress. So sad! I bet those kids really miss her. just keep putting one foot in front of the other.

Anna- look for my message at FB later tonight/tomorrow!

Tomorrow is a new day but at least we HAVE today and are here living and breathing. otherwise speaking of breathing, I have been sick on and off the last week with a nasty respiratory thing. ugh!!!

[airymoon]

Mary Jo I hope it gets better for you soon. Just when you think your doing better something happens to give you a reality check huh.

Dorothy I will be sending you good thoughts and vibrations. Keep up your positive attitude and keep us posted/

April Im sorry you hate the winters there. Im pretty tired of it here in MI too

Linda so glad you vacation is going so well. I too am jealous of you in the warmer weather and sunshine.

becky

[Kelly]

[align=center]SAVE THE DATE!![/align] [align=center] [/align] [align=center] [/align] [align=center] We are excited to meet you!! Come join us at the Beyond Indigo Reunion!![/align]  When: August 14^th through the 16^th,   2009. We suggest you arrive the night of the 13^th.

Where: Minneapolis, MN

For Who?: All Beyond Indigo members and people healing from grief and dying journeys. This means YOU! If you know someone who is not a member invite them along!

 We will be having speakers, social networking, opportunities to remember our loved ones and just a plain good time.

 More details (schedule, pictures of the location etc) will follow in the next 7 to 14 days.

 We need at least 25 people to make this event possible. We hope to see as many of you who can make it!!!

 Have questions? Please post in the Beyond Indigo Reunion Forum at  http://beyondindigo.com/forums/view_forum.php?id=83

 

Kelly Baltzell, MA

President

Beyond Indigo

[lindat]

Becky,  I wish I could send you some sunshine!!!  This has been a miserable winter!  I will be back in April and plan to head your way to see you.  Will plan it better when I get home.  It will be great to meet you finally.

April, Computer programming...  It will be completely covered by a pell grant for the first year and  a program in MI called No Worker Left Behind will pay for the 2nd year.   The admissions guy has turned out to be a good friend - we hit it off right away.   He says he can get me a good job right out of school as long as I do well, even though I will be almost 65 by then.   I think I finally know what I want to be when I grow up   

I know what you mean about the winter - it has been a rough one this year and I just had to get away.   I have an entirely different attitude now that I am warm again!!!

Michele, I will call you next week when I get back to SD - I think my son will let me borrow his car...

Love all you  guys....

[scottslove]

I just felt like checking in today. I doubt anyone remembers me but I was here, I guess it was over a year ago now. I see quite a few familiar names. Anyway I just wanted to say hi. It's been 2 years and 7 months since I lost my Scott. I find the pain doesn't get easier it just becomes part of who you are. I try to find other things to look forward to, that for me I guess is the hardest part. I am sorry for all of the new names I see here and wish the ones I recognize and all of you piece in your hearts.

[aprilmoonflower]

scottslove- that is the beauty of message boards. you can just pop on and use it when you need it! I think in a lot of ways the second year is the hardest. It has been for me anyway. Now I just feel like I am getting really farther away from the past. I still get sad but I am more indifferent to it most of the times. Maybe it's t hat we just learn to cope I'm not sure.

linda- good news! that's wonderful about school! I am glad you are having fun in Cali. too! I am jealous! Spring is just around the corner here though. It's odd to anticipate spring after all these years. I had forgotten about that!

so is anyone here planning on going to the BI gathering?

[rodless]

Minneapolis is an easy drive for me (although I hate city traffic) but I won't go unless I know some of you are going to be there. It would be fun to meet.

Things are better here. Sunshine and March 1 on the calendar help. I can't believe how much I still miss Rod some days. Been doing a little backslide. Maybe spring will get me going forward again.

[lindat]

I might go, just depends on work and school, will know by summer...  It would be great if a bunch of us could make it...

[airymoon]

Linda  It would be great if you could comethis way. I could meet you half way too. I would love to go to the reunion. I hope more of us will go I would love to meet you all.

Things have taken a turn in my life. Strange how quickly things happen. The man I was seeing went back to his almost ex again as you know. Last weekend They moved in together.  Just a few weeks after he decided he wanted to make things right with her and we ended. I didnt want to be around here while they were doing that mostly because i was so angry at him i just didnt want to deal with it. I went to Ft Watne to see my sister.  I had been talking on line to a man that had lost his wife 5 years ago and I asked him to meet just to say hi and put a face to his name. We talked for over 2 hours that night. Now we are talking daily and texting. He seems really nice and he actually gets 'IT' about dating after you've lost your love. How your not really looking to find your soul mate because you already had that. How sometimes dating is just dating and you dont really know if your ready for a relationship until you meet that person. It was just nice to talk to someone that didnt immediately think we were a couple. I dont know where it will go from here but I think I am just going to see what happens and not analyze it or worry about it.

The man i was seeing knew I was going to meet him and texted me all that day telling me he missed me and loved me and that was the day his wife moved back in with him!  Now he is mad that i am talking to another guy. WTF he is the one that wanted his wife and not us and truthfully i am better off. I think he is really messed up and even though i think his feelings for me were real they werent enough to make him want to stay and i dont think they ever will be.

I hope many of us do make it to the reunion. I think it would be great to meet there.

becky

[missyouhoney811]

I plan on going to the reunion.  It should be a great time just meeting everyone that I have communicated with for the past twenty-two months.  I think I'll stay a bit longer because I want to go to the Mall of America.  My son said that it was great.

I will be getting back to routine this evening at 7PM I go to Zumba.  I think I will try every other day for the first week and the second week full speed ahead.  Must tone that core.....

I think my neighbors will be going to Vegas with me on 2/24.  I am happy for that because this is the first time that the Venetian is giving me two free suites.  I would hate not to use both of them.   Plus, they will also be able to be in the $50,000.00 slot tournament.  It should be fun... 

I have not called my doctor for the results.  I see  him on the 19th and I am sure he would call me it it was necessary to see me sooner. 

Blessings,

Dorothy

[missyouhoney811]

Goofy me...............its been twenty-six months not twenty-four..

[missingcurtis]

Becky, I liked what you said about being able to talk to and be with someone without expecting to be "dating".

I am still friends with a guy who has been a friend to me ever since Curtis passed away. 

We both know we are just friends and I think he is a very nice person.  He has listened to me and helped me understand some of my feelings.  I think I am good for his ego.  LOL 

He seems to call me when he feeling bad or has been sick or feeling sorry for himself. 

But I enjoy talking to him and listening to him.  Friends are a good thing to have.

You never know what might happen.

Debbie

[laquinn]

Yeah I think a friend is a very good thing to have around now. I have a couple of guy friends one being my boss that I can talk to and vent to when things get bad and he seems to always know when I am having a bed day. The other I can talk to about anything that is going on and even though he has not been where I am at he seems to understand alot.

I am so ready for the warm weather to come and stay here. I think once I can get out and do more I might be feeling better about things. My brother asked me the other day about going with them to California in the spring and I am really thinking about going I think I need to just get away. As far as making any changes I think I have made enough for now with moving back to my home town only 4 months after Randy passed away. And going back to work.

Hope everyone is doing ok talk to you all later Lela

[armaiti]

Well, I'm down with the flu - again.  Mainly achy and tired.  Really miss Ishaq.  One of my girlfriends brought me some soup and worked on my neck for a while - she's a landscape gardener and has REALLY strong hands. 

I agree about the friend thing.  I have a couple of guy friends to call on and it's nice to have that male energy around, and know that they don't expect anything - one is married and the other has a girlfriend who is also a friend of mine.

I can't come to the reunion - too expensive to travel there.  But I will be in LA for Ishaq's twins graduation from USC in mid-May.  Michele, I hope I will get to meet you finally - I'll let you know the exact dates when it's worked out.  The graduations are the 15th and the 17th, and we're doing a family reunion either before or after. 

It's cold and rainy here today, but I don't mind since I'm sick.  Better to be sick on a yucky day than a nice one.

Take care everyone,

Anna

[mishknit]

absolutely anna....

that would be great!

peace,

michele

[aprilmoonflower]

Anna- I hope you are feeling better!

I was just wondering...for those past the 3 year mark? Is there a point where you just stop caring anymore? I am so numb anymore to even the thought of D. I just DON'T care anymore!!!! I have let our house foreclose, sold our wedding rings and basically got rid of everything we owned together. and I just don't care anymore about any of it! I feel like I need to get rid of the past materialistically and I am actually glad to be FREE of him. Is this a normal thing or depression? Anyway I guess I am just moving on..it feels good but also I just don't feel anything anymore toward HIM. maybe it's just realizing what a liar, addict,alcoholic, liar,etc that he was??? I see my new partner with OUR kids and think it was supposed to be this way all along, because I can't imagine D this involved or caring like C is...not really even comparing, but just the truth I feel deep down..

well I doubt I will make it to the reunion, but I will try..I think we have something going on that week in Aug. though so I will check..hope to meet some of you soon! =)

[armaiti]

For me, I don't think three or ten years will make a difference - Ishaq will always be first and foremost in my heart, my half-side, life partner and soul mate.  I'll never be over him.  But I can understand where you are coming from April, with D.  He ended up not being the person who you thought he was and he pulled some horrible crap on you.  So it makes sense that you'd want to get rid of the stuff associated with him and have a fresh start.   And I'm happy you've found someone to be with.

As for feeling better, I overdid it this weekend and now have a bit of a relapse.  My fever went back up last night, so I'm just going to take it easy this week and REALLY get well. 

Blessings,

Anna

[Error username not found]

Hey everyone. Long time no write.  Just stoppin by to see how you're all doin.

[aprilmoonflower]

I have been WONDERING where you've been baca! what are you up to?

WHERE IS EVERYONE ELSE???

hibernating??? it is becoming spring here in the northeast! (THANFULLY!) I am sooo tired of the winter..though I'm sure it will snow at least another time or two.

It is maple sugaring time here in New England, so we are going to find a sugar house to go to this weekend for a pancake breakfast. yum-o! I am learning all I can as next year I hope to have our own trees tapped!

how are you doing Dorothy? Any news yet?

Linda, Becky, Michele, Mary Jo? yoohoo!!!

[lindat]

Hi April, 

Still in CA.  Will be leaving for Spokane, WA to see my son on Apr. 7 and then flying to Biloxi on April 15th to see my daughter.

Visit with Jim didn't go well.  We had a big fight and I got a train the next morning at 4am to come back here - that was two weeks ago tomorrow..  I told him never to call me again and so far he hasn't.  I am having a really hard time and feel like I have been thrown right off the cliff again.  I know it will get better, but it really sucks right now.   Trying to put up a good front so that my family doesn't suffer by me not being present.  This is the last time I will see some of them for a long time.   My step dad is 90, so who knows if I will even see him or my mom again.   I wish I could say I was having a great time, but at least it is warm here.  This is the town where Terry and I met and fell in love and there are those memories everywhere too.   I wish I could leave, but I know from past experience that it doesn't matter where you go the pain is inside.   Whatever happens, I will make the best of it but right now it ain't easy.

Life goes on, it is way too short to waste it being miserable. 

Thanks for asking   I guess I needed to vent.

Michele, still hope to see you - will give you a call in a few days....

[missyouhoney811]

April, I talked with the doctor on Tuesday, NO CANCER.......Thank God!  You know I am the great candle lighter............If anyone happened to look in my kitchen window they probably would think I had some sort of chant going on for all the many, many candles that were burning and glowing on my kitchen counter.  Needless to say I am extremely happy my prayers were answered for health.  I also have to thank my angels that are watching me from up above.  Thanks for asking.

Did my routine on 3/11......went to see John.  I took him three lavender roses.  I also released three red balloons at his grave site.  I can't believe it is 31 months since his death. 

On 3/24 I will be going to Vegas.  HAPPY, HAPPY, JOY, JOY........On 3/24/06 that is the date that John went into the hospital and never returned home.  Maybe his spirit will help me hit on the $50,000.00 Slot Tournament.  I think I mentioned that the Venetian Hotel gave me two suites this time.  My neighbors will be going.  It should be fun.  I still have to figure out what shows I want to see....

I am back at Zumba five days a week.  So happy..

Blessings,

Dorothy

[aprilmoonflower]

Dorothy- that's AWESOME news! I'm so happy for you!!!!

btw guess what??? I am going to try Zumba class soon!

[armaiti]

Dorothy, that's awesome news!  And I'm glad you can get back to Zumba too.  Good luck with that jackpot!

Linda, I'm sorry that things didn't work out for you in CA...you really deserve to be happy.

At least the sun is out here again today.  Saw Ishaq in a dream last night...he was just smiling at me, the way he does...  I just miss him all the time.

I went in for my volunteer orientation this weekend at the Lane County Animal Shelter.  My official volunteer job would be "cat cuddler".  Really.  How cute is that?  I'll be helping with the abandoned cats and kittens, playing with them, and holding them, and giving them attention.  I get my one on one training next week and then I can start scheduling my hours to work with them.    I really like the volunteer coordinator, which is good.  I know from my years at the Red Cross here that if the volunteers don't mesh with the coordinator, there'll be problems.  But I like her a lot, and we seem to hit it off just fine. 

There are tons of birds singing in my yard today.  I think I'll go for a walk along the river later and take the camera, try to get some more bird pictures.  I could use a good walk to get my strength back from being sick.

Take care everyone,

Blessings,

Anna

[aprilmoonflower]

Linda- I wanted to add that totally sucks! I'm sorry! (((hugs))) enjoy soaking up the sun though!

[rodless]

I'm here. Same old, same old. Working a lot of hours due to coworker's death. Had some bad times through February. Most probably due to kicking paxil. Has been tough. Don't think I need it anymore (was put on it for anxiety when Rod was so sick) but had to get throught the withdrawal tears etc. Feeling better as each day goes by. Spring helps. Just restless and wanting to change everything about my life but that's pretty normal for me anytime. Think I talked about that before. I've always been a grass is greener person. Miss Rod everyday but know I need to look forward. Doing it is, of course, something else.

Sorry for you Linda. Maybe as up and down as that relationship has been, it needs to end but I'm sure it hurts like hell.  Hope your travels help.

Dorothy, Zumba starts here on St. Pat's Day... I'm ready to try it. Hope I can keep up. Good luck in Vegas!

April, so nice to hear about your new life...it's encouraging to think there's maybe something out there down the road.

Happy cat cuddling, Anna. Sounds "purrfect" for you

Hope everyone is doing ok. Was nice to check in here and see some posts.

[missyouhoney811]

MJ, I am so happy you will be starting Zumba.  DON'T GIVE UP when you think it's too hard. You can do it.  I believe it makes you feel better inside and out.  It gives you a happy feeling especially with some of the moves lol.......Remember age is just a number and it does not mean a damn when it comes to shaking your body and dancing.  If Zumba becomes a part of your life you might want to invest in the special shoes at danceforless.com......let me know when you start and how you like it.  I am also happy you are off the drugs...........I was never one for taking them.  I guess due to the fact my John had to take so many drugs and I knew the pros and cons on all the meds it just was not an option for me while grieving.  I delt head on with reality...........sometimes good sometimes bad...but I did it. 

Its a beautiful day here in Pittsburgh.  The sun is shinning  and the birds are singing.  I love Spring and warm weather.  This will be the year that I move.  I have no idea where yet.  I am actually thinking of leaving PA...possibly going to Florida.  Although, my son is here I have to think about me and what I want for the rest of my life.  A daily walk on the beach sounds good to me.  We will see....

Linda, try to be happy..

Blessings,

Dorothy

[missyouhoney811]

MJ, I am so happy you will be starting Zumba.  DON'T GIVE UP when you think it's too hard. You can do it.  I believe it makes you feel better inside and out.  It gives you a happy feeling especially with some of the moves lol.......Remember age is just a number and it does not mean a damn when it comes to shaking your body and dancing.  If Zumba becomes a part of your life you might want to invest in the special shoes at danceforless.com......let me know when you start and how you like it.  I am also happy you are off the drugs...........I was never one for taking them.  I guess due to the fact my John had to take so many drugs and I knew the pros and cons on all the meds it just was not an option for me while grieving.  I delt head on with reality...........sometimes good sometimes bad...but I did it. 

Its a beautiful day here in Pittsburgh.  The sun is shinning  and the birds are singing.  I love Spring and warm weather.  This will be the year that I move.  I have no idea where yet.  I am actually thinking of leaving PA...possibly going to Florida.  Although, my son is here I have to think about me and what I want for the rest of my life.  A daily walk on the beach sounds good to me.  We will see....

Linda, try to be happy..

Blessings,

Dorothy

[missyouhoney811]

Sorry for my double click...

April, also happy that you will be starting Zumba soon.  You will love it girl.

Blessings,

Dorothy

[lindat]

Dorothy, I am trying as hard as I can  

I signed up to walk 60 miles in 3 days in August (IN MICHIGAN) for the cure for breast cancer - I will post the link for my page as soon as I have it ready.   Knowing how hot and humid it is in August in MI, I must be crazy.   Just needed something positive and to feel like I was doing something for all the right reasons...

MJ - bravo for you!  It will be hard, but you are so strong!

April xoxox

Hope all of you are having a peaceful weekend!

[aprilmoonflower]

wow Linda that's great about the walk!!! go you!

[lindat]

Raising money for this cause is great, I will reserve my opinion on the walk until after... 

[aprilmoonflower]

is that 20 miles per day??? omg!!! you are nuts! you better get a good massage and pedicure after that as a treat! I hope you raise alot of money! do you have a website or something for donations?

[lindat]

20 miles a day for 3 days, no matter the weather - rain or shine.   Michigan in August is brutally hot and humid.  I just have to keep remembering it is for a great cause....  I will post the website address as soon as I get it finished - thanks for asking