Loss of an Adult Child

[Guest]

I've just spent the last hour listening to different artists singing "Imagine" by John Lennon.  No one does it quite as well as Lennon.  When the 16yr old Isrealite girl got up and sang with 80 children - 40 Arabic and 40 Jewish children I was overwhelmed.

Peace.  Sweet dreams.  "You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one." 

I want that song played at my funeral.  It pretty much sums it up.

Way before his time.

I want to change Stephanie's song on her memorial site to a more upbeat song.  But, I don't know how to upload them.  Gary does.  I'll ask him to do it for me tomorrow.

Nite all.  Susannah

[ericasmom]

Imagine that! Yes, such a great song/poem.

Kathy, thanks, friendships have been the building blocks of my life, my friendships with my sisters, the kids on my block and as I got older, new friends, as family does not always fit the bill of friend nor nurture. The friends I have in you and our Siblings here, beyond words for the way my heart feels because of all of You.

Mary Ann, I am sure that you are sick of snow, I have never heard of this much snow on the east coast mid-atlantic states, so be careful and hang on, the spring will be that much more gorgeous. Everyone out on the new global-warming snowbelt, be careful.

writing group, then a play downtown this afternoon, so little time to talk till tonight.

Love

dee

[hotrod]

Good Morning Indigos.

It is still early Saturday but NYC has only had a small sprinkle of snow for which I am so happy.  Betsy and MaryAnn I do hope your doing as well.  I am going out to breakfast and a little grocery shopping and a Movie Something called 44 inch Chest.  Hope I do not fall asleep:cool:.

 

Sherry Baby Lisa is adorable  Thanks for posting her picture.

Susannah I agree  that music is haunting. I hope you find it soothing.

Dee I love to go to Saturday Matinees -I am sure you will enjoy the production.

Rosie, Pam, Dan, Greg, Lynn, Terrie, Sonya, Kathy, Lorrie, Trudie, Leah, Kim, Collen  and all other Indigos stay safe and warm.

Betty

Stephen'smom:)

[zachysmom]

Hi all recovery is going well. Incisions barely hurt. What is bothering me the most is the headache I get everytime I stand up or sit up. Did some research and found it is due to the spinal they used. hopefully it ends soon. I am doing everything I should be. Hubby is very distant but who gives a damn I'm not worrying about that any more. If he doesn't want me oh well. when I was in bad shape he chose to go to a meeting leaving me here alone with my daughter. She and I managed though with out him. On top of recovering I have quit smoking. don't really miss it only occasional short cravings.

[hotrod]

Hi Beth

So great to hear from you.  I am happy that you are recovering so well. 

Understanding the pain makes it easier to manage.  Headaches from the spinal and some pain from the incision seems as if you have it under control.  Taking goood care of yourself is so important.  I am so proud that you also stopped smoking  That is huge  I did that in June.  

Just keep focusing on taking care of yourself and your daughter.  You are doing fine.

Remember that you are not alone.  So come here often.   I also was impressed  with your new attitude toward hubby.  Leave it alone.  Your mental and physical health are the most important.

Loved seeing little Zachy's face today.

Stephen'smom

[lolynbo]

OK SO IM AT OUR LADIES DINNER AND A MOVIE AT MY PREACHERS HOUSE....DINNER WENT WELL AND AFTER THE MOVIE WAS OVER AMANDA WAS TEXTING ME SAYIN..."IS EVERYTHING OK, KOURTNEY IS HERE AND VERY CONSERNED, WHERE ARE U MONTY AND THE KIDS".....SO CRAP IM TEXTEN  "KIMBERLY SAYS SHES FINE MAYBE ITS CUZ HER DOG IS SICK?", "MONTYS OK"..."KODY IM OK Y".....SO SHE SAYS MAYBE SHES JUST WORRIED CUZ  (MONTY AND I ARE KINDA WORRIED ABOUT BIZZNESS).....SO SHE SAYS SHES GOING TO SLEEP....

ABOUT TEN MINUTES LATER SHE TEXTS AGAIN "MY BOYFRIEND SAID ITS COLD IN HERE AND I CAN TELL KOURTNEY IS AGITATED SHE IS WORRIED BIG TIME"....

SO I START TEXTN MONTY AGAIN..."GO GET KODY FROM WORK FOLLOW HIM HOME".....NO REPLY.......................FINALLY....I JUST LEAVE DRIVING 70 .....HEADN HOME AND I CALL MONTY AND I SAY "DID U GET MY TEXT, ARE U GOING TO GO GET HIM?"....HE SAYS

"KODYS HOME, HE GOT PULLED OVER WE WILL TALK ABOUT IT WHEN YOU GET HOME"..

HE WAS GOING 75 IN A 45 AND GOT PULLED OVER AND GOT A WARNING AND A NICE LECTURE AND PICTURES SHOWED TO HIM OF A GIRL THAT JUST DIED IN A WRECK...THE OFFICER ALSO TALKED TO MONTY AND SAID "DO YOU WANT ME TO HANDLE IT OR ARE YOU GONNA HANDLE IT?" MONTY SAID "REGARDLESS OF WHAT YOU DO IM STILL GONNA HANDLE IT"

DAMN WAS I ABOUT TO HAVE A STROKE...I WAS A HOTTT MESS..

AMANDA SAID..."TELL KODY EVEN HIS SISTER KNOWS WHEN HE'S IN TROUBLE"

SO SEE OUR KIDS ARE SOOOOOOOOOOOO STILL HERE......

[Guest]

I found the trigger that releases the pain.  Living.  Trying to do everyday, normal functions.  It's showering and looking nice.  It's doing household chores.  It's taking care of responsibilities.  It's meeting friends for coffee.  It's in the chatter of "nothingness" that comes out of the people around me.  They talk about their lives, their jobs, the weather, movies etc.  I try to listen.  Somewhere after the first few words my mind becomes blank.  I stare at them as if I'm a mute.  Pay attention, Susannah.  Listen.  I try.

It's in loading the washer that the tears begin to fall again without notice.  They (the tears) have been absent for a few months.  The pain has been there, but the tears were dried up. 

 

The only comfort, the only relief, is in my grieving chair, wrapped in my electric blanket, holding my laptop.

 

It is there I can breath without difficulty.  It is there I can lose myself in the silliness of the internet.  I read about the stars.  I watch, carefully, what they're wearing on the red carpet.  I like some of the worst dressed outfits. 

 

It is hard to watch television.  I look at the TV but I miss most of the show.  My mind wanders. 

 

Her first tooth.  The first time she pooped in the toilet.  Her first step.  "Rescuing" her from the jungle gymn at least a dozen times and finally surrendering to the fact my toddler is a climber.  Her smile.  Her determination.  Smiling the first time, after speech therapy, that she learns to say "SSSSStephanie" by making the ssss sound and pulling the S out of her mouth with her chubby little hand.  She can't say her name without pulling the S out with her fingers.

 

And, then I breath. 

 

"She was never yours".  echos through my thoughts as I try to wrap my head around the fact that she has left this earth. 

 

I have to put it out of my mind.  I have things to do.  There are commitments to keep.  Appointments to keep.  I must remember to be gentle in my communication and not snap when thoughts of her are interrupted time and time again.

 

Grief.  Powerful.  Intruding.  Terrorism.  Unseen.  Tangible. 

[daveydow1]

Susannah-----Thanks, dear friend, for your kind words about baby Lisa, and for

asking about her. Yes, I agree......sometimes the world seems to be passing our dear

 angels by. I often feel that time is my enemy, and that the more time passes, the

 more my angels are pushed into the past. Of course, I also know, that to we....their

parents,....they will NEVER fade into the past, and will always be part of our

'here & now' until we meet them again.  Your memories of sweet Stephanie

and all her "firsts"  as a little child brings memories of Davey and his "firsts".

Lisa......well, she never saw her first birthday, Christmas, steps, etc.  May to

November.  That is all the time we had with her, but she's always in my memory.

Betty-----Hope that you are staying warm in this bad weather. Thanks for

viewing Davey & Lisa'a flag. Hope warm & fuzzy thoughts and feelings of your

dear Stephen will warm your heart today.

Beth-----Glad to hear that your recovery is coming along well. It's cold outside,

but let sweet little Zachy warm you from the heart out.

Dee-----What's your weather like in Chicago?  We got about 15 inches of snow,

and are now snowed in. I got out to take some photos of the huge drifts, and

snow-covered pine trees. Lovely to look at-------not so much fun to deal with .

p.s. Saw 5 or 6 robins in our flowering crab tree a few days ago, eating the fruit.

TAKE CARE ALL HERE IN THE BI FAMILY.  PEACE & COMFORT.

                    Davey&Lisasmom,   Sherry  

[summergirl]

Hello all Indigo's....no snow for us here on Long Island NY....missed us by about 5 miles, sounds crazy but I was actually looking forward to being snowed in and I HATE winter....maybe the idea of being shut in like a cacoon, away from the outside world is why I wanted it....

Susannah - thank you my friend and I too will hold your hand and walk with you when the "first" comes upon you...I so wish it did not have to be.  

Lorrie, I am just blown away with what Amanda is feeling and seeing, YES...our babies know, they are here.

Am I going crazy...I feel as though I am. I got up this am and cleaned like I was having a house full of guests, could not stop moving....so many things on my mind that I want peace from.....

Greg - my husband would like to know what kind of printer you bought ??

Time to think about cooking the ribs for dinner, Tavian is very happy, he loves ribs.

Love and Peace to all, Kathy

[bjsmom]

Lorri- You are sooo right, our children are still here. Not physically, but in the moments that we receive their signs, when we know that no one else could have sent them. So happy to hear that Kody is ok! Do you think the pictures affected him? The Dept of Transportation recently released a video of texting while driving and it shows graphic footage. Don't know if they pulled the add as many were complaining that it was too graphic.

Sherry- When we lose our child, no matter the age, we desperately need the assurance & comfort that someone, anyone will remember them through the years of time. When I visit the cemetery I am overwhelmed by all the graves that have no fresh flowers, have no love or thoughts sent their way, as if no one has remembered & basically no one cares enough to come visit. Denial is a comfort for that which will happen to us all. We remember though, we speak their names, we will never forget! Lisa & Davey, Davey & Lisa....

Susannah- Life is shock and I've had moments where I want to scream at people, "hey you dumb***, don't you realize it could happen to you too?" Believe I'm now at the point where I just ignore them or either I join them, depends on the day, moment or time. I basically isolated myself from the world in this last year, because watching others appear as happy as clams was just too much for me to bear. Not to mention all the looks you receive when the entire little small town knows, "hey, that's the parents of the boy that was killed". I would go to our 1 little grocery store and before I rushed out I would receive the sympathy talks or the looks of people that didn't know what to say, but stared all the same. Now, it's a little different and my guard is high. Funny, I almost dare everyone by looking them in the eye & speaking to them before they have a chance to say anything & then I move on. Guess it's the "mad" inside of me! I don't want sympathy, I don't need your words about a silver lining, I want your actions, I want you to remember his life, his goodness and that he was here, right here, not so long ago.

Deneace (Bj'sMom)

[daveydow1]

Deneace---Thank you for your kind words. Yes,----I agree with you, that

we would like our angels to be REMEMBERED... Not just shuffled back

further & further in time. I so understand your isolation. It is so early on

for you on this lousy journey we're on. Nothing makes sense. How I wish

I could say something to take some of your pain & sorrow away. Just keep

coming to BI. No place else can we find such understanding. BJ, YOUR ANGEL,

IS WITH YOU ALWAYS AND EVER. 

        Davey&Lisasmom,   Sherry

[mikesmum]

Had dinner with my baby brother last night.  He lost a son about 8yrs ago.  He had been seperated from him for a few yrs - bad divorce.  His son had CF and was recovering from a heart lung transplant.  Bill rang that night; someone thought he should know.  He drove to the hospital only to be told he wasn't allowed to visit.   He sat outside the hospital that night. He was a mess when he called me.  He wasn't able to see his son and was scared that he might die.   Luke contracted a 'hospital bug' in ICU and died that next day. 

As we sat and talked he touched on Mike being gone for 3yrs.  Tears came to him as he recounted that day.  His phone rang, it was me.  His 'little sis' telling him Mike had passed.  He described that feeling of helplessness.  Not know if he should come to me his sister or be with his nephew.   I never knew the impact my call had on him till last night.  He talked some more about arriving at Mikes house and seeing me.  Walking with me to see my son.   How he will never forget seeing me sitting with the boy we both knew from birth...

It was an late night, an emotionally draining night.  I have been caught up in world of losing Mike I missed the affect it had on others....Just wanted to share.

Lorri - Amanda must have a direct line to Kourtney......Hope Kody gets it.....young ones here still believe they are bullet proof at any speed, anytime...

Peace Out.....really really tired to day......

[lostwoher]

  Trudi, thank you for sharing that story. Im glad your brother was able to talk openly to you. Something Im sure both of you need.

Lorri, Im jealous of you once again. To have someone on the outside being able to reach those on the inside. Please stay calm and dont panick when Amanda is having her moments. It isnt all BAD. I think it is just awesome. I too hope Cody gets the message loud and clear. Keep the speed on the track boy!

Beautiful baby Lisa. So precious.

I ventured out today by myself to do some shopping. Main plan was to get a wreath to take to Kayla for valentine/bday and a new puzzle. Stopped at Michaels where I find my needs each time only to find absolutely nothing. I wasnt happy but oh well on to the next stop where I new I would find exactly what I wanted ( as far as a puzzle goes). Nope, the shop is no longer there! As I walked back to my vehicle in the freezing cold wind I had a total meltdown. How can I go home with nothing for my girl and nothing for me to do with my alone time?? Puzzles really do work good for me. Gotta pull myself together and try one more place even tho I despise going there (walmart). Low and behold the first thing I see is the series of puzzles I so wanted!! I was so thrilled that I totally forgot to look for the wreath. I just know that was my sign from Kayla letting me know... I LOVE YOU OH SO BEARY MUCH!!

So sorry for those of you in the snow covered areas. We lucked out here and only got enough to cover the ground and most is gone today Please be safe and stay warm.

I am walking with you Kathi and remembering.

Youtube didnt like all the videos Randy had on his file so ALL of them were deleted. Even the one he did for Kayla which deleted it from my myspace and my account on youtube which caused another meltdown last nite. Seems to be part of my everyday being this month.  Being the great guy he is he rejoined and added it  back for me so now I need to go redo my page. Its the little things that mean so much.

Susannaha (sp) I enjoy your words. No beating around the bush and straight to the point. Always heartfelt. Thank y

At the point of losing my train of thought again so I shall hush for awhile.

Everybody ok?

Lynn aka Casper's Mom

[lolynbo]

HOPING AND PRAYING FOR YOU AND LARRY TOM MARCIA...ON YOUR ANGELS 19TH BIRTHDAY...IM SURE SHES FINE BUT WE WANT YAL TO BE TOO...WE LOVE YAL..AND THINKING OF YOU BOTH....

HAPPY 19TH BIRTHDAY HEAVENLY BETHANY...(FEB 7,)

[heartbeataway]

Lynn,

 I love that you’re Casper’s Mom ...... and you’ll find the perfect Valentine for your girl just like you found the perfect puzzle set!

Trudi,

Touching story your brother shared with you. “ Walking with me to see my son.”

You are blessed to have a brother that cares enough to take that walk with you.

Deneace,

“I want you to remember his life, his goodness and that he was here, right here, not so long ago.”

That really is all we want isn’t it?

Sherry,

You saw Robins in your flowering crab tree ...... what a sweet image to have on such a cold, wintry day as this has been.

Susannah,

Powerful posting ....... “And then I breathe .......”

Lori,

I am in awe of your Kourtney ....... absolutely in awe.

Betty,

Did you enjoy the movie?  That’s one I haven’t heard of.

Amanda,

Baby Ashton is going to be a heartbreaker!  Adorable!

We have 36" of snow in our world ....... holy smolley!!

[briansdad]

[user=17871]summergirl[/user] wrote:

Greg - my husband would like to know what kind of printer you bought ??

It's an Epson 9900

[lolynbo]

OUR PRINTER IS  A ROLAND VERSA CAM VP 540...WE FINALLY GET TO TAKE IT OFF OUR TAXES THIS YEAR...ITS THE KIND THAT ALSO DOES VEHICLE WRAPS AND POSTERS...KOURTNEY AND MONTY HAD JUST WENT TO SCHOOL TO LEARN HOW TO WRAP VEH...SADLY SHE NEVER GOT TO DO IT..

US ALONG TIME AGO

 COURSE I DONT NO WHAT THE HELL IM DOIN..LOL

[Guest]

Just checking in.  I've read your posts, but I'm unable to retain what they said, so I'll read them again tomorrow.

My heart is full.  Gary and I went to see Avatar in 3D tonight.  I didn't want to go, but we needed some alone time and in the theater I don't have to make conversation or feel claustrophobic (sp?) by people.  I excused myself to the lady's room while Gary bought popcorn and a drink.  I locked myself in the furtherest stall and sobbed quietly in my hands, grateful I didn't put on any eye makeup.  I rarely do anymore.  I just cry it off.

Then the movie starts and I was lost in the wonder of it.  "That's what I believe!"  I kept thinking as this "science fiction, animated, adventure" expresses my spiritual beliefs so beautifully.  "That's what I bet heaven looks like" I think to myself in awe of the colors and the graphics.  "Oh, Mom, it's so much more!

Sweet dreams, my Indigo family.  I love you all! 

Susannah/Stephanie's mom

[ericasmom]

36 inches of snow in Virginia, amazing! We have 2 in Chicago, so I guess Sherry has the happy medium. Wow guys, a topsy-turvy winter hu?

Going to bed after a long long day of  busy, but need to just wish you all a good sleep.

Beth, I have had spinal headaches, I have had three spinals for surgeries, adn each time I had the headache. Just rest if you can.

Lorri, love that Amanda is clued in as she is, to Kourtney. What a gift. Tell Kody I would like a word with him...straighten up or I am going to give you a beat-down.

Trud, your brother's retelling, remembering the call, very poignant, makes tears in my eyes.

sleep tight All,

dee

[ericasmom]

Bethany,Bethany,Bethany-

A Happy Birthday to you beautiful Child.

Fly and sweep through the day, the day that your Parents find sweeter than any other, cause them to feel your peace and your love as they deal with the bittersweet of February 7th, 2010.

[mikesmomrs]

Bethany, Bethany, Bethany, beautiful Bethany...surround your mom and dad today with sweet thoughts and memories of your beautiful self---help them make it through the memories of this day that is such a gift to them, and yet such a torment...having you come into their lives was the most precious joy they ever knew; being with you again one day is what keeps them going and breathing...  Show them you are still with them, sweet baby. 

love and peace,  Carol  mikesmomrs

[mikesmum]

Marcia - Its already Bethany's birthday here.  I hope the skies clear and you are able to launch her lanterns.  I only hope she manages to 'put her outfit' together for the party I know our kids will be having to honour her 19th!

[align=center]Bethany[/align]

[align=center][/align]

[mikesmomrs]

Susannah:  Hugs to you as you work your way through the tears that send you into secluded places as your heart is assaulted with memories that cause you such longing.  I am so glad that the movie brought you to a better place in your thoughts....Yes, your daughter Stephanie is saying to you  "Oh mom, it's so much more!" 

Trudi:  thank you for sharing your story of your brother and you sharing your heartache and comforting each other.  The terrible times that you both have been through and the pain of the memories that you share is heartbreaking.  My heart goes out to both of you.  I am glad that you got to see him, though...perhaps a little healing took place as you both shared...not felt now, but perhaps will show itself further on into this journey. 

Lynn:  Yes, your beautiful Kayla led you to those puzzles...she is with you as you center your mind on them to take the focus off everything else. 

To those who had so much snow and wintery weather---please be careful and cautious.  We didn't get anything this time, but I hear Wednesday will bring us some of what you all got this weekend.    

I share sweet Bethany's birthday tomorrow, and once again, the question is posed as to why our beautiful angels left this earthly plane so soon, and we as their parents are left behind to lean into life and walk through the years of the rest of our lives without them here with us, with eventually them saying goodbye to us, as it should have been.   Mike always enjoyed birthdays, no matter whose they were, and he enjoyed mine.  I will never forget the first time he ever connected that the date of February the 7th was actually my birthday...he was about 8 or 9...somehow, he had helped me to celebrate in his childhood innocence, but had never equated that actual date with my birthday.  I think at that moment, a little bit of his oncoming adolescence tapped him on the shoulder and helped him build a memory.  He never forgot after that. 

I know that I have shown this card before, but it still remains my favorite--- I guess it always will be...deep gratitude lives in my heart for the memory of the day Mike made it and gave it to me for my birthday, struggling alongside the bittersweet thought that there will be no more cards from his big hands and bigger heart... (sorry it posted so large)

love and peace,  carol  mikesmomrs

 

[mikesmum]

Carol - That card is a keeper....I would have it framed!  Your boy is with you as you mark another year here.  Wonder what sky show you will be enjoying compliments of Mike......:dude:

[hotsauce]

HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY   B E T H A N Y .........................

 

show your mom and dad lots of love today.......................

 

it's a specail day for you all....................................

[nicksdad]

[ericasmom]

Happy Birthday Carol, what a good day this is in the world, to see two beautiful women born on this date, both Bethany and You. The moon and stars gathered in unison to produce shining ethereal beauties.

Love the card Carol, glad it posted large, the true sense of what Mike handed you. His heart all over the words, Love.

Peace on this day somehow, some way.

[hotrod]

                                 Dear Bethany 

          Wrap your Mom and Dad

                In Memories of your

                   Beautiful Spirit

 

                 

                   Betty

             Stephen'smom:)

[hotrod]

Dear Carol

The Card that Mike made  was so very beautiful!!!

I hope  that today you have many more beautiful rememories of his precious life

Betty Stephen'smom:)

[mysonrich]

 

Happy Birthday Bethany.

 

 

[hotrod]

Happy SuperBowl Sunday to All Indigos

Trudi I am glad you had the time to talk with your brother about your loss..  It is rehreshing to you soul to know others were/are with you.  I have a niece who was Stephen's best friend. She is about 5 yers older but she emails constantly her memories and each time we see each other she has a story that brings tears and smiles .

Beth , Rosie, and Betsy I just wanted to say I have been thinking about you and do hope you are treating yourselves well and come here often to get recharged.

Lynn Loved the story about the puzzles and Walmart. Kayla was taking care of you

Susannah I really enjoyed Avatar in 3D  The movies are a place were I can go and not socialize and loose myself as well..

Dee Glad you are not snowed in like Bonnie  Wow so much snow  !!Take care Bonnie and stry to stay warm.

Dan - Greg I made a test DVD for our meeting in July   It is about 4 minutes and can be played on my computer  I cannot play it on my DVD will that work ?

My heart is routing for the Saints but My head believes Colts have the advantage.

Have a Blessed Day Indigos

 

Lorrie.Maryann, Kathy, Terrie, Kim, Pam, Leah Colleen and all Indigos  Thinking of you

Betty

Stephen'smom

[4everjoeysmom]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{BETHANY}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

[ericasmom]

It is another beauty's birthday today as well, Shannon, my Son's lovely girlfriend. So really, the evidence is that this is a date that produces wonderful women.

Marcia, I hope that you and Larry are finding ways to celebrate this day knowing that this a tricky step, celebrating the day without the celebrant. Bethany however, is dancing her cute little self silly, surrounded in yellow flowers and sunshine, and blowing kisses to the two people that she loves best...

Lyn, the puzzle story is lovely, I pictured you at Michael's getting frustrated by the lack of product, and then the next store, until finally settling for the store you like least, and there greeting you was a stack of what helps you through the long nights. Thanks Kayla for helping your Mum.

Betty, I would have liked some more snow, we may get 4-8 inches over the next few days, which is such a nice thing for me as a walker, and for the students to play in. I am damned by those I know when I say I would like more snow, but heck, I would. If it is  going to be cold, it may as well be white and pretty and cleansing. I do feel for Bon adn Mary Ann and everyone on that coast however, as they are less prepared as far as salt trucks and such I think. That is a lot of snow, but the snowball fight shown on TVNews this morn looked wonderful.  Be careful everyone.

[briansdad]

[user=22932]lolynbo[/user] wrote:

OUR PRINTER IS  A ROLAND VERSA CAM VP 540...WE FINALLY GET TO TAKE IT OFF OUR TAXES THIS YEAR...ITS THE KIND THAT ALSO DOES VEHICLE WRAPS AND POSTERS...KOURTNEY AND MONTY HAD JUST WENT TO SCHOOL TO LEARN HOW TO WRAP VEH...SADLY SHE NEVER GOT TO DO IT..

US ALONG TIME AGO

 COURSE I DONT NO WHAT THE HELL IM DOIN..LOL

lorri,

If I had the money that's what I would have bought.By the way that is the equipment the place that I work for sells. I'm their expert. I sell all the supplies for them.It's a good printer.

[lostwoher]

 Bethany, BeTHanY, BETHANY!

Im saying it loud for all to hear.

 

 

[Guest]

Sending you hugs and strength, Marcia!  Wishing your Bethany was here in the flesh to celebrate the way you surely would have preferred.  Grateful she was born.  Grateful you got to be her mother.  Grateful she still lives.  Her spirit is much older than 19, or rather, much wiser.  I pray you get a sign, comfort and extra love from her today.  May the pain in your heart get a reprieve long enough for you to recognize the sign when it comes. 

Such beautiful birthday wishes sent to her from your Indigo family, Marcia!  Such love for you and your angel!

What a precious card from Mike, Carol!  I hope you are able to enjoy this day with some semblence of peace and joy.

Dan - the card you made for Bethany is absolutely beautiful!  I marvel that so many of you are able to create such beautiful "gifts" on a computer!

Lynn - I'm so glad you found the puzzle you wanted!  I hate going to WalMart, too. I really don't have a good reason, because I do most of my shopping in one stop at WalMart. 

Trudi - What a wonderful brother you must have.  Him losing his son and the situation around it.....to being with you with Mike died.....he must be a very strong soul.  I'm so glad you two got to share with each other and I'm so sorry for both of you!

I hope all of you who are being inundated with snow, wind and cold are warm and safe. 

To the rest of my Indigo Family, have a peaceful day!

Much love,

Susannah/Stephanie's mom

[lostwoher]

 HaPPy BirTHdaY CAROL!!!!!!

[bjsmom]

Happy Birthday

Beautiful Bethany!!!!

Marcia & Larry, I hope the weather clears to make the launch of the lanterns. Please know that we all are thinking of you!

[mpsmom]

To all my BI Family,

[align=center] Thank you so much for keeping our family in your hearts today.[/align]

Right now the sun is out but we are expecting rain, I hope it will hold off until this evening so we can launch our sky lanterns at dusk.

[align=center]This is a picture taken at Bethany's first birthday party, [/align]

[align=center]when life was happy.[/align]

[align=center]Love, to you all, Marcia   Bethany's Mom Forever [/align]

[align=center]Happy 19th Birthday My Angel Baby [/align]

[align=center] [/align]

[briansdad]

I hope Bethany gives you a beautiful sunset tonight. In honor of her birthday.

 

[heartbeataway]

[align=center]HaPpY HaPpY BiRtHdAy

[/align][align=center]Bethany!

[/align]

[lolynbo]

If I had the money that's what I would have bought.By the way that is the equipment the place that I work for sells. I'm their expert. I sell all the supplies for them.It's a good printer.

GREG..I DONT NO ANYTHING ABOUT IT..THE REASON I HAD THE TYPE IN MY LIL OL HEAD IS CUZ I JUST TOLD THE BOOK KEEPER WE HAD BOUGHT IT IN 07' AND THE OLD TAX PPL DIDNT EVEN PUT IN IN THE BOOKS FOR 07'..SO SHES GOING TO SEE WHAT SHE CAN DO FOR US...BUT YES MONTY IS VERY PROUD OF IT....SO IF WE HAVE QUESTIONS OR ANYTHING HE CLD TALK TO YOU????

WELL IM PRAYING MARCIA AND LARRY HAVE A BLESSED BETHANY FILLED DAY...HOPE THE WEATHER ACTS JUST RIGHT FOR THEIR LANTURNS..AND MEMORIAL THEY HAVE PLANNED...

KIMBELRY ST BERNARD WAS ON DEATHS DOOR BUT THEY FOUND OUT WHAT WAS WRONG...EDIE HAS "ADDISON DISEASE"..OF COURSE IT VERY RARE AND TREATED BY STEROID SHOTS (THAT THEY CANT AFFORD) THE BILL IS ALREADY 1200$ AND GRANNY AINT GOT IT....SO I HOPE THE VET WORKS WITH THEM...

 

[shorty16]

My sweet Marcia

We share the meaning of this day, but in two totally different reasons.  Your Bethany joined the world on this day in 1990(?) and my Mother left this earth on this day in 2008.

I consider both of them getting life, but just different kinds.

May your daughter, Bethany be beside you today.  Wrap her arms around you and whisper "I love you, Mom"

Colleen

[shorty16]

Hello my sweet indigo's.

So many to say hello to.

Lorri - Vrruum.  Race car woman.  Cool

Deneace you are in my thoughts alot.  Keep strong, you can do this, just like I did.  The facts will free us.

Trudi - my friend, Hope you find sunshine in your days.

Kathy, Lynn, Sherry, Bonnie, Betty, Amanda (Ashton is BEAUtiful), Susannah, Marcia, Carol, Beth, Bonnie, Dee, Greg, Dan, All others that I think of -

May your week be filled with positive light, keep our heads up and move into life.

Thanks for being here.

Colleen

[daveydow1]

 

  HAPPY HEAVENLY BIRTHDAY,

 

   SWEET SWEET  BETHANY.

 

[daveydow1]

Carol-----What a sweet treasure you have, in the birthday card dear

Mike made for you. Happy Birthday to you, today. I hope that your wonderful

memories of your beloved son, Mike, will warm your heart and soul. Peace

be with you, friend.

      Davey&Lisasmom,   Sherry

[summergirl]

HAPPY SWEET BIRTHDAY BETHANY....

[mikesmomrs]

Hello Indigos:  I hope all those who were snowed-in have gotten shoveled out by now and are staying safe and warm. 

Dan:  Such a wonderful enhancement of the picture of beautiful Bethany...I didn't know that her ethereal beauty could be any sweeter, but you've made it even more so with your picture.  I know that Marcia and Larry treasure it.  Marcia:  I love the pic of Bethany with her adoring daddy...I hope the rain held off and you were able to do the lanterns this evening...

Thank you everyone for your sweet birthday wishes...my grandson, Jameson and his mom took me to a Chinese Buffet that we have gone to many times...Mike had been there with us, also, and really loved it.  I knew he was with us today, because as we pulled into the back part of this very small parking lot, this is what we met, just as pretty as could be:  (this is a pic I got off the internet, because I didn't have my camera with me today)

Mike's wife Sarah and their son, Damon, came along with us.  She sat right across from me.  When the fortune cookies were handed out, she handed me hers, saying "this was for you."    On it was the Chinese "word for the day" which was:

Hubby and I didn't have time to go to church today, so we went this evening, at 5:00---something we rarely do, usually going on Sunday morning.  The response for the second reading today was "In the sight of the angels, I will sing praises to the Lord."  We all will, one day, be in the sight of all of our angels...that is what we hold onto so we can breathe, each day---those blessed good days and the "other" days.  Today was a good day for me.  I hope you all don't mind; I just wanted to share it with you.

thank you again.

love and peace to all,  carol  mikesmomrs

 

[mysonrich]

Carol, sorry I'm late. Is there any cake left?

 

 

[summergirl]

MY SWEET DAUGHTER...I REMEMBER WHEN YOU GOT THIS CHAIR FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY, JUST 2 YEARS OLD. YOU SAT IN IT FOR EVERYTHING, I BELIEVE YOU SAT IN IT UNTIL IT FELL APART. HOW I MISS THOSE DAYS, IF ONLY I COULD TURN THE CLOCK BACK AND SEE YOUR PRECIOUS LITTLE FACE SMILING UP AT ME...HEARING YOU SAY MOMMY. I LOVE AND MISS YOU SO MUCH MY GIRL....I REMEMBER, I REMEMBER