Grief & Healing from a Christian-Biblical Worldview

[daniellemom]

I'm reading a great book. The name of it is When God Doesn't Make Sense. By: Dr. James Dobson, I really think it's well worth the read. It is written by a Christian man and reference a lot of scripts in the Bible. The title is not the best title in the world but the book is about in our minds it doesn't make sense but our way is no the Lord's way.

[loveyoujustin]

Hi everyone.  I've been posting again the other thread, but I just wanted to say a few things.  Lana~thinking of you today, Claudia, love you as always, and the puppy is absolutely adorable.  Patti ~ waiting to hear from you???  Hope all is "ok" and last, but certainly not least, Anne~so very relieved to see you back.  I've missed you and thought of you often!  Wish the vacation and the new "news" on a trial were something you didn't have to endure, but we will be here for you every step of the way.  Sonya, I'm not leaving you out, for sure, I think I got a little carried away with my message to you on the other thread.  Guess that happens sometimes, right? 

Love and Peace to all,   Trish      Here goes another picture!  That's my little dog, Coco.  Justin loved her!  She has alopetia, (sp?) and is almost 10 now, so she looks a little different!

[wyomingsal]

While we are on the topic of cute doggies I thought I would put a picture of Midna up.  Josh named her Midna after a character on a Zelda game.  She looks so sad in this picture.  Probably wondering were her Joshua boy went.

[wyomingsal]

Sonya,

I love James Dobson.  His focus on the family is the agency that supported our crisis pregnancy center getting an ultrasound machine and training.  I have read some of his books about bringing up boys but will have to keep an eye out for the one you mentioned.

Sal

[4everjoeysmom]

Midna sure is cute, Sal.  I had to giggle a little, because looking at Midna's photo, I somehow could visualize the connection Josh made with your dog and the Zelda game.  My sons liked Zelda when they were that age too. 

P.s.  I'm also a Dobson fan.  I used to listen to his programs on satellite radio when I was commuting to work in the States.  A friend of mine has a daughter who studied for a summer under Focus on the Family, and it has made a lifetime impact some several years later.  What an amazing ministry he has built for the glory of God.

[daniellemom]

Sal,

Cute Dog!!  I have to agree he does look sad.

I hope eveyone is having a decent weekend.

Sonya (Danielle's Mom)

 

[daniellemom]

Clauida,

I can understand where you are coming from about the rain, well not really because I'm not in the rain forest but we have had rain for about a week and I keep thinking when the sun comes out it will be better.  I think I've started eating for comfort now, and I've got to stop and start walking or something.

It was six months Friday the 11th since Danielle went home.  I know it will be two years for you real soon I will be praying for you.  I don't think I tell you enough how much you have encouraged me and help me during these first months.  Thank you for word you type and every prayer you breath for all the mothers and fathers, wifes on this thread.  THANK YOU!!

Sonya   

[4everjoeysmom]

Sonya, BIG HUGS, and THANK YOU!  I, like you all, struggle with very real daily issues in grief.  But as it has been said here before, the difference fir us is our help in Christ.  Truly, though, a huge part of my ability to even be on a healing track is the blessings of being able to be here with you all and giving encoragement aqnd love through the journey.

I have been into comfort eating off an on throughout my life, and even had a tme or two in my younger years of finding myself in a near-anorexic trap.  I don't have to worry about the too skinny issues now that it seems I gain abotu 10o pounds a year that don't go anywhere...  the signs of getting older and not watching what I intake as my metabolism changes, I guess.  But I do hate how I feel after sitting here and eating all day.  I need to find something else to replace that motion...   I am praying about it.  It's a harder trap to get out of than I realized.  I know I'm not alone in it, and so if any of you find any good replacement therapy, please do share.  I think we're definitely more prone to it when the weather is bad, like winter and rainy seasons...

Blessings to you all, Claudia 

[wyomingsal]

Sonya and Claudia,

I love that both of you are so positive and encouraging.    

Yesterday at my son's upward basketball game there was a little devotional given at the half-time.  It is funny how things make you think about your Heavenly child when you least expect it.  They were talking about the verse in the Bible that talks about where your treasure is there your heart will be also.  Of course they were talking about money and Earthly things.  My mind and heart jumped right away to where my heart has been lately.  "Store for yourself treasures in Heaven that last not earthly treasures that fade away."  I have one of my greatest treasures stored in Heaven already.  Perhaps our children aren't the treasure we are "supposed" to store up but I couldn't help thinking of Joshua and Danielle and Joey, Justin, Mike, Brent, and everyone of our children.  My heart has been in Heaven so much these days because my treasure Joshua is there.  Our children are our greatest earthly treasure and thank Jesus we can see them in Heaven for eternity.

Sal

[lagrangel]

Sal,

 Your post was so true to my heart.  Our treasures have gone to heaven and how we think of them so often.  God blessed us with out precious treasures for awhile and now" they" will be blessed by God's love for eternity.

[loveyoujustin]

Beautifully said Sal,  thank you.

Thinking of all.  Another weekend almost over, another day closer to the beautiful day of reunion.   Peace and Love,   Trish

[bigmikesmom]

Hi everyone,

I agree with and feel everyone's comments. All so precious to read.All the dogs are so cute.What kind are they? I still haven't gone to new york to get the mini-daschound. It's about 3 hours away. My husband doesn't want a dog. We ,too, have had a dog all our married life-33yrs. I am going to get the puppy and I know Paul will love it. I am a little nervous about it though. If I can ask, I need all of you to say extra prayers for my son Matt. He is having some bad days, just like all of us, coming to the realization that Mike is no longer living life on earth. See, I can't say died, I don't want to believe it either.

Dear God, Please continue to hold us as we continue together on this journey of grief, Help us to one day come to an" acceptance "and if possible a feeling of" peace" that our children are forever with you in the joy of eternal life. Thank you God for giving us this "Hope" of seeing our children and being with our families together forever in your glory. Amen

Love to you all,

BigMikesMom,Patti

[lagrangel]

Patti,

 Thank you for that wonderful prayer it will be a wonderful way to start my day. I pray often but it is so wonderful to have others pray for each others journeys. It has been a up and down weekend for me. My oldest son and wife came home for birthday celebrations. It was wonderful but at the same time sad because Brent was missing. After the boys left of course I had those tears for missing Brent and all the fun times we shared together as a family. Prayers and love to each on this day, Lana

[4everjoeysmom]

Lana, I too have had an up and down weekend, mostly quiet, reflective, longing, and some sadness...  I am missing Joey very much, and like you, I love sharing with family and my surviving son especially, but after every conversation, every event, the sadness creeps in for the longing and missing Joey in the mix of everything.  He was always in the center of everything...

Patti, I echo your sweet prayer.  It's not that I battle any longer with acceptance, and more often than not I do have a calm, quiet peace about Joey's fullness in the glory of God now.  It is that terrible longing and missing that just will never be silenced, no matter what I do or where I go.  That is the energy that I must continue to try and refocus into something honorale to God....  but oh how very hard it is....  it is something I will never cease praying for God's help with, because it just seems impossible at times...  BUT...  all things are possible through Christ.  Right?!

My JoJo is a ShihTzu.  It's funny, but when I got him he was just the tiniest little fur ball.  I bathed him in a very small stock pot.  My facial cleansing brush was his first toy, (as most of his toys have come as gifts from the States), and the round part of the brush was the same size as his head.  He grew pretty fast, but even now is only about 12" long, 8" off the ground and about 15 pounds fully grown.  He'll be 2 in a couple of months.  ShihTzu's were used as watchdogs, believe it or not, for ancient Chinese emporers and such, as they would sit at their masters feet and "alert the media" anytime a stranger would be nearby.  I do have to say JoJo sits at my feet or in my lap 80% of his waking hours, and alerts the media anytime he hears an odd sound, footsteps, voices...you name it.  He's even at my feet in the kitchen when i am washing dishes or cooking.  Funny how that bllodline just runs and runs through centuries and generations.  I have always been fadscinated with hunting hounds as well and that wonderful natural instinct.  When you finally get your pup, Patti, if you need any tips or moral support, you can count on me--a canine lover from way back.

Love and blessings to all!  -Claudia

[daniellemom]

Patti,

I have and will continue to pray for Matt!

[4everjoeysmom]

Patti, as will I.  I know it is a very difficult "season" for Matt with his birthday coming, the trial and all...  Your whole family is in my prayers.  Love, Claudia

[msroderskie]

Just a quick hello to everyone.  I've tried to catch up on posts and I'm with you all in praying, particularly for you Patti with the upcoming court date.  Last night my husband Steve and I were praying for everyone on this thread.   We are thinking about having our cable TV shut off -- rough times lately with a recent bout of unemployment -- and we figure that keeping the computer online is definitely more important than keeping the squawk box hooked up.  I get such comfort coming to this site and there are so many connections we can make through the computer.

I've enjoyed the photos of the dogs!  I have been an animal lover, particularly horses and dogs, ever since having conscious thought!  Right now we have a big mutt from the shelter.  He looks mostly black Lab, but he's got Rottweiler in him.  He has been the perfect dog since the day we brought him home about four years ago.  No accidents, always quiet and polite and great with the grandkids.   Sometimes he's so smart it's almost scary.  My husband will say to him, "Kramer, I need to lay down on the couch" and the dog will get off the couch immediately.  Yes, we are bad dog parents and let him take up much of the couch most of the time.  Kramer is at least 8 or 9 years old and beginning to show signs of age, so we sometimes think of how awful it will be when he's gone.  This dog has been such a great comfort in grieving. A real blessing.

I have to run to work.  I hope you are all having a good week.  Trust in the Lord and lean not on your own understanding.  Thank you Lord for your mercy, kindness, and grace towards us.  Love in Christ,   Rody

[bigmikesmom]

Rodi,Claudia,Sal,Sonya,Lana,Trish,

Thanks for your prayers for Matt and myself and husband and family for the upcoming trial. You are all so kind-hearted.

Love,

Patti

[4everjoeysmom]

Patti-  BIG HUGS to you!!

Rody, I had that same aging issue with my beloved Boxer Gretchen back when i lived in the States.  I adopted a pup when Gretchen turned 9 so that she stayed in shape and had more energy playing and entertaining a new pack member.  Lymphoma took my Gretchen in November of 2005.  I put her down the night before Thanksgiving, hopped on a plave the next day to see my family and break the news of departure for the mission field in the months to come, adopted out our pup to our vet tech, and things just kept going from there...  But Gretchen wet out with the regal nature that made her so special.  I'm glad that we had that pup to fulfill her last year with more zeal.  I'm glad to see your post, by the way.  I miss you when you are away. 

A recent development here with us is that about a month ago we invited a widow and her 24 yr old son (family members of our ministry partners here in Ecuador) to live in a small house here at the ministry retreat site.  They seem very blessed and happy, and we are equally blessed to have them here.  Carlos (the son) has been working part time on the grounds here as well, which is a huge help since there has been only Michael and i to take care fo the place.  Amanda (the mother) helps when needed as well.  Anyway, it is still yet to be seen with my own eyes, but apparently Amanda has suffered from schyzophrenia for some time and has been on meds, although I have detected not a hint of it.  And for whatever reason we learned yesterday that Carlos has been under demonic attack.  Apparently ever since his father died when carlos was 5, he has off and on been tormented.  My husband is of strong discernment in spiritual matters as he did deliverance ministry for a time years back, and he senses this with carlos is spiritual and not medical.  Yesterday morning his mother found him hiding under his bed, just to give you an idea of the intensity of his fear.  We went down last night for about an hour and prayed over the house, Amanda and Carlos, and we ministered to them for some time during which I shared my pain about my son's death and a special link to Jesus through that loss.  I feel there is healing being done there for Carlos and for me, and for Amanda as well.  It was revealed last night that her late husband's brother had for a time repreatedly attacked her sexually.  I wouldn't be surprised if the schyzophrenia is a misdiagnosis of what may also be demonic attack.  I know this may sound very foreign to some who will read this, but spiritual warfare is no stranger to the people of God.  We see this kind of stuff all the time here in a land that has been riddled with generational curses and practices of crafts that are a stench to God's nostrils....    Anyway, I share this with the request for added prayers as we continue to minister to the family.  Thank you all for being good friends and my sisters in Christ.  Love, Claudia

[daniellemom]

Claudia,

I will pray for the family and also you and your husband to be lead to say and do the right things for this family. So sad.

Patti,

I hope Matt can feel the prayers that have gone up for him and in some small way, feels better.

Rodi,

Glad you are back. I'm sorry to hear you have to turn the cable off. I've never had it so don't even know what I'm missing. I will pray for you and your families needs.

[wyomingsal]

Thank you oh Lord for a new day.  Thank you for your power and strength.  Thank you Lord for working all things together for the good of  those who believe for our eternal kingdom.  Renew each of us.  Fill us each day with the power and might and peace and joy of your spirit.

Thank you Lord for Claudia and her family.  Bless their ministry.  May you give them the strength and wisdom to discern how to help this widow and her son.  Thank you that Claudia's husband is able to discern when spiritual warfare is present.  I ask in your powerful name, Jesus, that the evil attacking this precious family would be banished and this lady and her son might know deliverence from Evil.  The evil would be replaced with your Holy Spirit and they would know you as  the true Messiah. 

I ask prayers for Patti.  Lord please give her wisdom in regards to her son Matt.  Give her encouragment.  Give her the joy of seeing Matt smile again.  He is struggling with the loss of his brother.  How it hurts a mothers heart to see her child in pain.  How it hurts Your heart oh Lord to see all of us in pain.  I pray that you would heal Matt's soul and spirit.  Help him to turn to you for help and allow your peace to fill him with hope even amidst the pain of missing his dear brother.  You alone are able to heal and fill with hope for eternity. 

Lord you know each of our struggles.  You know of the financial struggles that Rody is going through.  Give her peace and faith to trust in you.  I have known those struggles...living without cable,  wondering how I will pay the electric bill, wondering if we will make rent.  If we tithe how will we survive?  Give Rody the comfort that you are faithful and will provide for all of her needs.  It is hard to trust in your Lord.  Strengthen and renew her faith each day.  Thank you for your faithfulness to us.

Give joy today to Sonya and Lana as well.  Ease their pain today and comfort them.  Let them see your works in their life.  Let them know you have not forgotten them in their time of  grief.  Thank you God for creating our children and letting us love them.  We are forever changed because we have been mothers been given the chance to love as you love.  Unconditional. 

Have a great day each and every one of my BI Christian family.

Sal

[daniellemom]

Sal,

Thank you for the prayers so very much for everyone!

[4everjoeysmom]

Father, I too lift up to your throne Rody and her family's financial challenges.  Please show them in the same light of Truth and revelation what you have shown me and Michael time and again, that you are faithful and that as your Word says,

Luk 12:29-31 And do not seek what you are to eat and what you are to drink, nor be worried. For all the nations of the world seek after these things, and your Father knows that you need them. Instead, seek his kingdom, and these things will be added to you.

Lord, we have seen your hand at work in our lives time and again.  We know of your goodness and mercy.  Lord, teach us to be stewards of your gifts and help us to discern that which we need and those things that we want but can live without.  Help to guide us in your wisdom and strength, precious Spirit, and Lord bless Rody and her family abundantly for their faithfulness in seeking your answers to their lives and struggles.  In Jesus precious and Holy name, Amen!

Rody, living here in the mission field, totally dependant on God's provision, I kid you not we have seen miracle after miracle.  There was a time when we literally were here with our funds having fallen to 11 cents.  We prayed and prayed for God to answer our need, that we would not worry or fear but carry on to the tasks he had for us each day.  He answered that prayer.  We didn;t have any emergencies come up in that time.  We had peace and we did carry on with our work.  We didn't run out of food.  And before we needed it, but not a moment to soon or too late support checks started to arrive.  There was another time when a boy fell here and hurt himself--life threatening head injury.  God not only delivered means to get him transported by an ambulance with stabalizing equipment (just happened to drive by empty in passing as this boy was being transported in the back of a pick-up), and enough funds came in donations to pay for this boy's emergency surgery and recovery.  We received first class seats (without our mention) on our flight home after Joey died--as the airline woman said, so I could rest more comfortably.  We have had support come in for every single need without knowing when, where or how...

God is good.  God is faithful.  God does provide for our needs.  He will see you through.  I am learning things don't always happen the way I envision or expect, but God always shows up to bat when we need a pinch hitter the most.

Bless you and may the Lord be your help in this present time of need.  Love, Claudia

[daniellemom]

Such sweet prayers! During your recaps of all God has done, I'm reminded of the song, Four Days Late, But God is always on time.

Love to each of you!

Sal,

How is your son doing? I'm still praying for him and your family.

Sonya

[4everjoeysmom]

Patti, Sonya, Rody, Oneta, Trish, Lana, Anne, Shuugar, Cheryl, Kay, Sally, and Veronica's Mom:

Please PM me with your e-mail addresses so that I can send to you a copy of our Prayer Calendar.  It is ready! 

Anyone else who would like to be added to the prayer calendar now or after the fact, please post here or PM me with your loved one's birth and departure dates, as well as any significant dates that you would like us to pray for you.  We pray for one another daily, but with a calendar as a reminder of when significantly difficult times are approaching, we are better equipped to pray on our own without those who are in deep pain and reflection having to ask...  Make sense?  Calendars will be updated as often as possible to accommodate add-ins.  Bless you all!  -Claudia

[4everjoeysmom]

Still waiting on a few to reply so I can send the calendar out in one e-mail.  If I don't hear from all by the morning I will go ahead and send it to those who have responded so far and continue on as I hear from others.

By the way, The header of this thread looks a little strange, I know.  It is being corrected.

Hugs my friends and sisters!  -Claudia

[loveyoujustin]

Claudia~ trishwgn@aol.com      Love you,   Trish

[bigmikesmom]

Claudia,

Thanks for your effort in doing the calendar.

mikulin@adelpfia.net

 love,

Patti-bigmikesmom

[bigmikesmom]

Claudia, I made a spelling mistake on my e-mail

 

mikulin@adelphia.net

thanks-patti

[msroderskie]

Hi everyone,

I think I posted my e-mail once, but here it is:  msroderskie@msn.com.  Sorry I'm late.  SEems to be a pattern.

A huge AMEN! for the prayers that have been offered up, especially for Matt.  May He seek You Father, and find the fountain of hope that You have waiting for him.  May You Lord beome his utter refuge in every moment of pain and grief.  Help Matt to realize while he's seeking You,  that You will listen to his pain and anger about his brother's death.  Help Him Lord, draw him to Yourself, keep him seeking you, don't let him give up, lift his depression, do not let him believe the lies of the enemy, silence the spirit of the age from Matt's mind and cause him to hunger for Your Word.  Help him to cling to You.  Thy will be done in Matt's life, Father, in Jesus name we ask.

Thanks everyone for your prayers concerning our situation.  It will take us a while to recover and things will be tight, but Steve and I have to keep trusting God's provision.  I think we have to become more fearless in giving.  Claudia, thank you for the great examples of God's provision in times of peril and penury.  PRAISE HIS NAME!  I will pray and stand with you concerning the attacks your friends are experiencing.  I have no gift for discernment, and in such a situation would not have a clue whether it was a demonic attack or an organic mental state.  

Love in Christ,  Rody

 

 

 

 

 

[4everjoeysmom]

I sent out the calendar (in a Word Format--Yuck!) today to several, and still have 6 more folks to get the calendar to, including you Rody.  Oneta is having trouble reading the file, and I don;t know about anyone else...SO...  I've decided, my husband is going to the City on Monday for an overnighter and will have hi-speed access..yay!  So I am going to have him forward to all of you a PDF file, which is much neater and user friendly.  It is almost 3 MB of file, and believe it or not, 3 MB will take me forever to send from the rainforest.  I've tried to send it to Oneat twice today only to have it timed out after about 1-1/2 hours of trying.  Sorry for the wait and inconvenience, but I promise y'all will love it.

Rody, Thank you so much for your prayers.  I am ever and always humbled by receiving prayers from my sisters who often are struggling to keep their heads above water as well.  Love you all!  -Claudia

[imsuziness]

Claudia,

I just wanted to write and thank you again for your inspirational words.  Today was a good day - all day.  I think it might be the first one... and YOU led me back to the place where my Faith was ...just waiting for me. 

I went to work today...I audit Daycare homes...and when I got to one particular home, i was sitting talking to one of the Childcare Assistants after the "work" part was done....and she gave me her condolances and then i could see she was on the verge of tears and really wanted to share...so I asked her if she had lost someone close to her...and she said that her father had the same kind of unexpected, out of the blue heart attack...at just about the same age as my Dad did - but after 25 minutes of her Dad not breathing, he started breathing. She expressed how painful it is now as her father suffered brain damage during those 25 minutes.  I cried with her, and as I left the house I couldn't help but think that God had her share that heartbreaking story with me as reassurance that the end of my Dad's life here on Earth was so much less painful... and although my selfishness wishes the paramedics could have worked some magic...God's Will was that Daddy's glorious day to go home had come and nothing the paramedics were going to do was going to change that..God brought my Dad, my precious little nephew Evan's Grandpa, to Heaven to hold is baby Grandson....... and I look forward to the day that saying that isn't quite so heartwrenchingly painful....but I do believe it....and before I met you, I had forgotten. 

So thank you again and again.

God Bless you and your family and your work....

Sue

PS - My brother and his wife have created a foundation for families who lose young children and need help financially for memorials or counseling...i'd love it if you would go and see their website:  www.angelcheeks.net.

[daniellemom]

Claudia,

Thanks for the calendar, the pictures are beautiful!!!

Everyone,

It's been a very hard weekend and starting off as a bad week. It just seems that I have been throw back to the first days of losing Danielle. Please say a little pray for me. Thanks!

Sonya (Danielle's Mom)

[bigmikesmom]

Sonya,

I will say a BIG prayer for you. God will hold you through this.

Love,

Patti-BigMikesMom

[lagrangel]

Sonya,

I will keep you in my prayers this week. Just lean on the Lord for your strength this week. He is always there for us, I know the pain seems so difficult at times.

Claudia,

Thank you for the wonderful Calender it means so much to all of us. You are a true blessing!  Love to each, Lana

[msroderskie]

Sonya,

I will pray for you too.  You never know when grief will come in as a wave, but the Lord is there with you.  Cling to Him, as I know He's holding you.  He will never leave you, nor forsake you.

Psalm 91:2 - I will say of the Lord He is my refuge and my fortress, my God; in Him will I trust.

Rody

[veronicasmom]

Hi Claudia--I have PM you my email but have not yet received the calendar.  Shall I send it to you again?  Thanks, D.

[daniellemom]

Rody, Lana, Patti,

Thank you very much for the prayers. I know the Lord is holding me up and it means so much to me to be able to ask and know that my friends will be praying for me on my rough days.

Patti,

I will be thinking about you tomorrow as the trail starts you will be in my prays all day, please let me know how things are going for you.

[4everjoeysmom]

Hi All, My phone (which also serves as internet dial up) has been out of order since wee morning hours of Saturday.  It just came back on now.  I am so sorry to not have been able to respond sooner...

Sue, BIG HUGS, and I am SO BLESSED to read your post and know that your faith journey has always been firmly rooted--just temporarily covered under storm clouds.  God will carry you through those rough times, and He will be your guiding light that leads you to peace and joy along the journey as well.  We all have our ups and downs, so know you have friends here that will walk with you anytime you need a friend.  Much love to you Sister!

D..  I just got your e-mails.  I made the calendar into a PDF file, which is too big for me to send via dial up.  I had my husband send it to Oneta while in the city and didn;t have all the other e-mail addresses.  I'll see if Oneta got the file ok, and maybe she can forward the PDF for me to everyone..     I'll see what happens and let you know ASAP.  I promise.  I haven't forgotten you--just was knockjed out of commission for a few days.  It's amazing how much the phone is my lifeline to the outside world.  I literally have had no contact with anyone in the US since last Friday...ugh.

Blessings and hugs to you all!

Patti, your family is in my prayers BIG TIME this week, as are you Sonya.  And Shuugar, you were on my heart Sunday...  Love, Claudia

[bigmikesmom]

Hi Everyone,

The trial has been postponed again. I cried when I found out. This is the 5th time it has been cancelled.It is such a roller coaster of emotions. My sisters and their husbands and my brother all took vacation days from their respective jobs. It is just unbelievable to me. The prosecutor felt so bad he went to tell my husband at his work place. He is taking full responsibility.Apparently there is a video from the troopers car from after he arrived on the scene and he didn't let the defense attorney know about it, so she was able to have the judge postpone the trial till she was able to view it,but get this, the trial is now scheduled for Aug 6, that's a pretty long time to view it. I have to leave it go. This is also in God's Hands.

tHANKS FOR REMEMBERING and praying for my family. I love you guys.

Claudia,

I didn't get a calender either but I think you know that. I appreciate all your effort.

Patti-BigMikesMom

[4everjoeysmom]

Patti, I'm so sorry.  I read a book not so long ago, (When I Lay My Isaac Down by Carol Kent).  I HIGHLY RECOMMEND you find a copy and read this.  The story is a bit different than ours in that her son lives.  In thinking he was protecting his wife and step daughters, he murdered his wife's first husband and is now incarcerated for life w/o parole.  Carol and her family went through postponement, one after another, for a good while as well.  But what's remarkable about the book is the core message.  I found it very comforting and inspirational, yet very raw and full of insights into deep grief being complicated by circumstances such as you are going through, a trial.  And even though as I mentioned, Carol's son lives, she went through a very painful "letting go" process for the things she could not control, the trial dates and all that surrounded that as well.  I don;t want to give too much away, but it really is a book I think you might be able to glean some insights from, given your raw emotions and the circumstances that make your grief more complicated.

I will ask Oneta to send you the PDF file of the calendar, and I'll be sure to update the calendar (next time around) to include your new court date.

God bless you Patti!  I know this must be so difficult for you.  But even in this I believe God has a purpose.  I will be praying for His glory to shine through and make it clear (as an encouragement to you) for why it was better to postponbe at this time.  Even when we cannot see His justice, He is at work.  It is His way...

BIG HUGS, Claudia

[daniellemom]

Patti,

Sorry to hear about the trail, I pray that you find peace while waiting on the trail to start in August.

Everyone,

My brother's bestfriend was killed in a car accident on Monday. Please pray for his mother and brother. I went by their house yesterday afternoon and introduced myself to his mother and told her I would be there for her in the coming months. Her husband passed away a couple of years ago, so she is by herself. Her son was 39, but you all know no matter how old your kids are they are forever your babies.

Claudia,

I shared the calendar with my mother (I hope that was OK) she loved the pictures and also wanted me to tell you how very special of a person you are and how your light is shining!!

Love and prayers to all!

Sonya (Danielle's Mom)

[4everjoeysmom]

Sonya, Oh such sad news about your brother's best friend, and the mother who now has lost a son.    I am certain God will guide you to be an extraordinary comfort for this woman when she is ready to let you in.  Remember we all go througfh shock and a denial of sorts for a time.  I encountered the denial phase with a woman I visited Sunday who had lost her son 3 months ago.  She literally made herself scarce as I sat and talked mostly with the rest of the family.  So sad...  All we can do is pray for them until their heart opens to us.  Bless you for being so "there" for her in the midst of your own pain.

Alos, I'm so glad you like the calendar.  Tell your mom I send thanks and hugs for being such a sweet mom.    Love, Claudia

[daniellemom]

Claudia,

I just went to say hello and just for her to see that I'm still here and living and breathing. I remember when Danielle passed away, a lady came to the house that had lost her son maybe 2 months earlier to a car accident and it meant a lot to me just to see her and to know that I would live through this, because at first I wasn't so sure. I hope once the numbness wears off she will call me if not I will give her a couple of months then call her just to check on her and say her son's name out loud.

I will pray for the family that lost their son 3 months ago and hope that the mother will soon open up and allow God's love to show through you like it does so many times on this thread. Thanks!!!

Love and prayers always,

Sonya

[bbarbie55]

Keep me in your prayers tomorrow it is my daughters first angel day and i'm going to put flowers on her grave with my other daughter. I can't beleive its been ayear its seems like yesterday she was in the hospital fighting for her life.

my son in law refuses to let me see my grandson because i wouldn't watch hime for nine days in Feb while he went to Florida with his live in for vacation I couldn't I have ajob and no way to get him from school. So they got mad and the last part of my daughter was taken away.

Keep me in your prayers tomorrow will be hard.

Deb

[4everjoeysmom]

You can count on my prayers Deb.  Such a complicated grief...  I have experienced that kind of vindictive behavior from others, and it is heartbreaking when the ones truly hurt are the innocent--the children.  Of course it is of no fault of yours as well, but how cruel to use a child as a pawn to get what one wants, good or bad.  And it is such a hurtful thing--everyone gets hurt.  I know tomorrow is a difficulkt day on your calendar--a day that will never ever be just another day.  My heart and prayers are with you, dear one.  may God give you comfort and strength for the journey.  Love, Claudia

[4everjoeysmom]

Patti, I'm sure you've got lots on you rmind.  Just checking in to see how you are doing, and Matt too.  I am thinking of him and praying for his dear heart.  I know how very hard it was for my son Patrick to face his birthday without Joey.  My heart breaks for Patrick at every turn when he experiences a new ache because he misses his brother.  As moms we grieve not only our losses but also the losses our children feel.  Please know you both are in my thoughts and prayers.... 

Oneta, I know we've exchanged a few e-mails, and I so appreciate what you've shared.  I am glad that the covering of prayer is bringing you comfort and peace through your days of special remembrance, and for the journey as well.  Bless you!

Love and Blessings to ALL, Claudia

[grannyc]

Claudia, Thank you for all the hard work and the beautiful job you did on the prayer calender.  What a blessing it is!

Deb, Many of us will be praying for you.  Its just another unfair situation.  And our God is bigger than the situation!

Sincerely, Cheryl  ^j^

[grannyc]

Hi All,

just attended the funeral for my Uncle today, I found this to be reassuring.

 

"TOGETHERNESS"

Death is nothing at all.  I have only slipped away into the next room.                       

Whatever we were to each other we still are. Call me by my old familiar name. Speak to me in the same easy way you always have. Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes we enjoyed together. Play, smile, think of me, I am in your heart, in those memories.

Life means all that it ever meant. It is the same as it always was. There is absolutely unbroken continuity. Why should I be out of your mind because I am out of sight? I am but waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, just around the corner.

All is well, Nothing is past. Nothing has been lost. One brief moment and all will be as it was before - only better. Infinitely happier. We will be one, together forever.

Our Hope!

CH

[lagrangel]

Cheryl,

 WoW! Thanks for sharing that with us that brings a special comfort to me.

                              Love, Lana