Loss of an Adult Child

[hotrod]

Good Morning Indigos

Happy St. Patrick's Day

Crystal You handled yourself with such dignity and courage today in Court. Even if you wanted to explode. you thought the thoughts but did not act!!! The reward A beautiful song and message fro your Sweet Angel. I am happy for you.

Colleen Great insight and support for Crystal

Sherry I agree with Dee and Betsy the support, compassion, wisdom and understanding that you share with each of us makes being an Indigo such a treasure. I am so sorry that you could not retrieve Davey's angel . I know the other angel is not the same.

Dear Betsy Thank you so much for the beautiful photos You certainly are a creative photographer. The arrangements, the color the subjects touched my spirit . I am glad you , Rhonda and all else with near death experiences were not lost. You have all Blessed my Journey Praying for SIL

Kathy I do hope your Dad continues to improve. My prayers continue.

Dee I join you in your prayers for the people of Japan.

Diane In my thoughts

Konnie thanks for caring and letting us know.

Sus You are a wonder Giving support and help to a young women at the same time as you are being Mommy to 3 of your daughter children and grieving her loss

Trudi I am glad your heart is warmed watching the little news Good luck studying and planning Mal's 60th l

Dee, Sharen, Rhonda Sherry,, Betsy and all Bird lovers I do love the story about the birds and especially the Starling.

My sister rescued a hurt one a few years ago and kept it because it cannot fly. Each time she entered the room where the bird was recovering she would say "Hi How are you doing" One day, continuing up to today she entered the room and before she could speak the little bird says " HI How are you doing" It made her so happy . It is the cutest thing. We also went for a walk on the beach today and there were two large gray seals sunning themselves near the waters edge. Marine Life Patrol were guarding them closely while advised everyone to not touch them . That although they were healthy , they were resting That was a special treat.

Amy,Sonya,, Leah. Diane, Crystal, Shane's;mom, Beth and all Indigos Have a Blessed day

[shorty16]

Happy St. Patrick's Day

The definition of "Colleen" is "An Irish girl"

My Grandmother was 100% Irish and married a 100% German.

Chatty bunch last night. I did not bring my computer home - I was disconnected.

Dee - 60 degrees??? WOW, we may reach that today. I opened a few windows before leaving for work today. The kitties will be in so happy with what I call "Kitty TV" The birds, squirrels, bunnies, etc. that we see and that torment them.

Crystal - I am so happy that you were able to maintain your composure under such pressure. When I was in that court, I felt like I was crawling out of my skin. I wanted to be anywhere else but there. Hang on girl - Use the time between now and the June court date to work on you. To take good care of yourself and take it easy and relax (easier said than done, I know). The stress comes soon enough.

We have no April birthdays, so I will party with the rest of you - OKColleen, Brian's Mother Forever

[Crystal16]

Happy St. Patty’s Day to my Indigo Family…

Betsy- Sweet encourager that I’ve been blessed to have in my life.

Betty- It was hard keeping my dignity especially when the public defendant said we still need expert testimony from the gun specialist…”are you kidding me… you pointed the gun at my daughters face and pulled the trigger.”

Colleen- I appreciate your words of wisdom you have walked in my footsteps. Any suggestions or feedback you can pass on I am open to.

So, the gentleman I am dating lately is taking me on a date Sunday to a Rod Stewart/Stevie Nicks concert. Scott is picking me up in a limo taking me to Fort Lauderdalestopping at a Chill’s to eat then enjoying an evening of entertainment.

Sus, Diane, Sharon, Sherry Dee, Karen, Kathy Greg, Dan, Trudi, Crystal, Amy, Leah, Carol, Beth, Brian’s dad, Rhonda. I pray you all have a peaceful day.

[shorty16]

To my friends.

Yummy, healthy, fun snack

4 Cups Oatmeal (can add bran etc to make the 4 cups)

½ Cup raw sunflowers, sesame seeds, etc.

¼ Cup Oat Flour

½ Cup Honey, Maple syrup etc.

½ Cup Brown Sugar

½ tsp salt – Optional

¼ Cup Canola Oil

1 tsp Vanilla Extract

¾ C raisins, dried cranberries, etc

½ Cup nuts (raw)

Preheat oven to 300 degrees – no higher.

Place wax or baking paper on baking pan.

Mix all wet ingredients thoroughly

Mix all dry ingredients thoroughly – except fruits

Mix all together, thoroughly (except fruit) – this is where clean hands work the best.

Spread mixture evenly on paper and place in oven.

If you choose to have fruit, bake granola for 20 minutes add fruit and bake another 12 minutes.

If you are not using fruit, bake granola for 25 minutes.

Mixture will be soft when removed from the oven. Let sit for 10-15 minutes until hard. Break into desired sizes and enjoy.

Colleen, Brian's Mother Forever

[charsng1234]

I had the weirdest dream about shane. One of his friends is in jail I was on my way to visit him but than I remember shane was in jail to. He was in a big case and he had a couple friends visiting him. They were on a ladder cause he was high up. He was all red and laughing and smiling. I said hi we talked for a minute he said he was fine than I left I looked back he was not looking at me. I felt bad in my dream because he seemed more happy to be with his friends. Than I woke up. I am happy I seen him in my dreams but that was so sad to.. sharon

[mikesmomrs]

HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY to all!!!

Today is a really beautiful day...the brightest sunshine I've seen in weeks and the temp is supposed to go up to 60 or more. I am supposed to go out and look at about 4 apartments for Davis...he has to work all week, 9 to 9, and I am going to narrow down the selection. This has been an ongoing process, to include his actually moving into one a couple of months ago, but it didn't last because his roommates turned out to be really dirty and one of them really weird, who wouldn't stay out of Davis's room. So, he is looking to live alone. I don't know how that will work out, as he does not like living alone. We shall see.

There have been tons of posts since I posted the other day...I will try to remember what I've read, but don't put any bets on my ability to do that...lol!

Betsy: the pictures are truly beautiful...wish so much I could have been there. I've been to a couple of flower shows, but nothing that put on such elaborate displays...so awesome. Thank you so much for sharing. Prayers for your SIL. I think it is good that you are going...they will appreciate the support.

Diane: I pray you are doing well and know that we all hold you in prayer and thought. When you can, let us know how you are.

Colleen: (Irish girl ) you have been so supportive and your advice has been wonderful. I love the recipe, but alas, too many things in it that can't be consumed here. Will give it to my daughter, though.

Kathy: Holding your dad close in thought, also.

Betty: How awesome about the seals...such a treat! Thank you for sharing.

Sus: I agree, it is wonderful that you are taking the time to give support to this young woman...she will benefit greatly for association with you and your wisdom and kindness.

Dee: I have had to tear myself away from the news...my heart breaks for all of those people in Japan, and the worries about the reactor...watching the faces of the olderf (and all, actually) people, so frightened looking...prayers for all of them.

Crystal, the wonderful song, the rainbow, and the beautiful "rainbow" of flowers...you are blessed, so very much. Thanks for sharing.

I know I have not "talked" to everyone as I wanted to, but I have to run...have an apartment "viewing" in 45 minutes and am not even dressed yet! I will be back later today...to all of our beautiful Indigos, thinking of you, always in my prayers, holding you all close in thought.

sending love to all,

[Guest msnher]

Hi Everyone;

Not a lot to say, just popping in to say hi. I'm okay. My heart is heavy for all the new people here and for the heartache around the world, but I really am okay. You all are in my thoughts constantly.

Sonya and Amy - I dreamed of Danielle and Ashley last night. In my dream they were together, friends. Ashley was brushing Danielle's hair. They were very content. In my dream I was praying for both of you and when I saw your daughter's I told them they needed to let "your mothers know you're alive". They just smiled at me and disappeared.

Love to all!

Susannah/Stephanie's mom

[ericasmom]

NIce dream Sus...

Good to see Shane Sharon, but I know it was sad too, sorry,dreams are so unsettling sometimes.

Carol, great to see you so go out there and narrow down the field for Davis, what a grreat Grandmom you are.

Love to all, got to go, laryngitis and working on my report cards. I am at school, teaching third grade without a voice is interesting, the kids whisper...love it. I just write everything down on the board and use a whistle when it is warranted. we are going to a play later, so that will be nice and quiet.

Greg, I so agree, would not change the joy for the absence of pain...never.

Write more later,

dee

[zachysmom]

Just wanted to drop in and say hi to everyone. So HELLO. I also wanted to offer an ear to anyone who needs it, I don't work so if you need someone to talk to please pm or email me enesbitt@gmail.com and I can meet you in the chat room the only day I wouldn't be able to do it is on fridays because hubby is not in school and we do alot of running those days. But I am usually available most nights. If I can't be with you in the chat room right then I will respond to you to let you know when I can be there. I never thought I would be able to offer help to others in just 2 short years after my son becoming an angel but I am so always remember there is a (figuritivly) shoulder here if you need it. Please make use of it when needed.

[westleysmom]

Betsy-I wonder that sometimes too, why I was left here. Did you ever watch the movie "Signs" with Mel Gibson where he tells his brother there are two kinds of people, those who believe that someone is watching out for us and those who don't? And his character ends the conversation saying "There is no one watching out for us. We are all on our own." But by the time the movie is over, his faith has been restored. I don't know when my movie is going to be over, I hope I get my faith back by then.

Beth-That is sweet of you to offer your shoulder to cry on. I might take you up on it sometimes. I always like to see sweet Zachy's face on here.

Carol-Glad you are so much better. Helping Davis find a place, good luck. I always wanted to help Westley get set up on his own, I regret every day that we never got to do that. Take care of yourself on all your new meds and stuff.

Susannah-what a great dream. I always imagine that Danielle had beautiful hair from her picture with the earphones in, but can't see much of it.

Colleen-Happy St. Patrick's Day, Irish girl. I just saw a recipe for Irish Coffee Cupcakes. I love a little Bailey's in my coffee (I'm probably the only person at church on Sunday mornings with Bailey's on my breath, but then again, maybe not) The granola recipe looks good, my husband is not a snacker like me and I would end up eating it all if I made it.

Who was it that had a tattoo on their wrist with their child's name? I was thinking it was Amy but can't remember. It seems like it was light colored and whoever it was posted a picture. I was thinking about getting one of Westley's name on my wrist, but wasn't sure if I wanted a color or black or like the one I'm thinking of that was almost flesh toned. I'm a big chicken, but have just been thinking about it. If anybody knows what I'm talking about, just let me know. I might have dreamed the whole thing.

Hope the weather is nice for all of you, its springtime in TN (at least for today)

[crystalann]

So I keep hearing about the If I die young song. My mom passed 2 1/2 years ago and she loved her country music I hated it Watching tv one morning turned to the country video channel that song came on and i listened has a part that says funny when your dead how people start listenin So I started listening every morning to that channel and the music both my daughters Tiffany 21 and Chelsea 14 and I all sang it Chels made me put it as her ringtone. We looked into the band perry and found out they wrote that song we all both boys too talked about how deep that song was and that these young kids had wrote it.We all listened to more and more of moms music To the point that even the boys were singing along to songs they didnt really even like But we still havent listened to that song since never thought it would have meaning in my life.Have hit a sad bump in the road have been crying all day but wanted to share my familys story with that song LOVE TO ALL! Crystal

[mikesmum]

Sounds like our Summer has truly flown North...enjoy!

The mornings here are becoming chilly even though there is sunshine later in the day, its still not warm.

Crystal - Yep people say the stupidest things. What does the expert (definition, a drip under pressure) bring to this? Boy has gun (dumbass) boy points gun, girl loses her life. I can just imagine this suit coming in and on being shown the weapon says.. 'Yep that's a gun alright'. Nothing further DUMBASS.

Like Colleen says take care of yourself in those days between. As hard as it is not to let your mind wander to the darker corners, try to find some sun and just be when you can. The stress will come without any assistance from whatif whys etc.

Betsy - A stent? Thank goodness she is doing okay.

Well people its official I'm an Undergrad student of psychology with her first paper due 27th March. Yes that is the day of Mal's 60th party. An yes I'm on BI not researching or writing....but hey I did manage to lock myself out of my universities web site

Thinking of you all......Trudi...

[mysonrich]

Crystal, My mom died 5/21/10. ( My uncle 5 days before. )I moved to north east Pa to be closer to her after her heath failed. I originally brought her to my area near Philly but, long story short,she wanted to go home. Less than 5 months later Rich died. Here I thought that my kids were settled and would be ok with me 3 hours away. I regret that decision to move but, I don't think I could have saved Rich from death.What I wanted to share was a song my mom loved. I remember this from a very early age. I hope you can listen to it.

http://youtu.be/FKCnHWas3HQ

Trudi, she isn;t ok. The stent was placed to open a vein,a artery so her breathing would improve. The cancer is aggressive. Started in her breast, she had chemo. Showed up again in her breast and lung. The tumors are blocking air flow/breathing. So the stent. I may be wrong on where it is exactly but that is the reason it was placed.

Colleen, green or orange? And Happy Birthday to Michelle.

Mid 60's today and a nice evening. I'm going outside to take it in.

[ericasmom]

trudi, did I tell you that I am so proud of you taking a class right now. How cool, it keeps your brain wired doesn't it. I love classes, would like to take one again soon. Enjoy Dr.Trud.

Beth, so glad that you see your role is that of nurturer here, you worked hard Kiddo, and now others will benefit from your big heart.

[aim630]

Susannah-Thanks for sharing your dream with us :)It really meant a lot to me and it made me laugh & cry because that is so Ashley...She always had a million friends & if we went on vacation, within an hour if there was someone nearby who was her age, she'd have a new friend. Very unlike Katie & I, who tend to stay in our shell unless forced out of it. Danielle does look she has beautiful hair.

Rhonda-yes that was me that posted a picture of the tattoo Ashley's best friend got. It's called a white tattoo, and I had never seen one, but I like it a lot better than a regular tattoo. I'm too afraid to get one, I think it would hurt too much! I will try to re-post it.

Crystal-That was so nice that Ashlee sent you a sign after you had to see Dylan laughing at the trial. She is showing you that she is there with you & to stay strong. I also saw a picture on facebook of the beautiful rainbow flowers your boyfriend sent you. I believe that was also a sign. I'm glad you have found someone who sounds like a really great guy!

Betsy-I am sorry your SIL is so sick. Your family will appreciate you there helping them.

Beth-That is so nice of you to offer to help the parents who are newer here & really need someone to talk to. I love seeing Zachy's face also. Everytime I watch the video Karen made, when it got to the picture of Zach it made me sob even harder. Such a beautiful little boy, and such a kind heart to offer to lend a shoulder to lean on.

Colleen-Happy St Patrick's Day! My grandmother was 100% Irish, my grandpa 100% French (dad's side) and my mom's side is 100% Italian. Ashley & Katie have a little bit of a lot of different things, although Ashley really took after the Italian side. Thank you for sharing the granola recipe, it sounds delicious. I will try making it this weekend.

It has been 60 degrees here today, although I didn't get to enjoy much of it outside. Had to pick my mom up at the airport. Thank God the week of the dogs is over...we managed to get them all out 3 times a day. Bittersweet picking my mom up at the airport today, because the last time I was there was 2 yrs ago picking up Ashley & her boyfriend.About 2 months before that I had to pick her up there also. I work right next to the airport, so I picked Ashley up on my lunch hour. I tried to tell her all the shortcuts I use to get home, and somehow she went the wrong way & ended up in Akron (about 45 minutes out of her way). I had to use mapquest on my work computer while she stayed on the phone so I could get her home. That was actually a trip to NYC by herself to see her best friend. She just decided to go one day after she got her tax refund, just out of the blue. I remember telling my boss I was irritated with her because she did not use the money to pay her bills, but I was glad she was doing it while she was young. Within 8 months, she was sick & hospitalized in a coma, never to leave the hospital again. I'm glad she got a chance to do that. Now I'm crying.

Goodnight everyone, thanks for listening.

Amy/Ashley's mom

[ericasmom]

Just got back from a walk. Lovely, at almost 65 degrees and the robins were the last to sing out their goodnights just as they are the first in the morning. My favorite songs. I still have no voice but if I could have spoken, I would have told the robins that their song wraps me in hope.

Love to you all, prayers for all those aching, prayers too, for all those you love who are also aching.

Diane you out there?

Carrie?

Leah?

Cindy?

Elaine?

PS Greg, could you once again put the email where one might order your lovely bumper stickers?

[crystalann]

I didnt get to see it, but i do know the song Downtown! As sone as i saw the name my mind started singing it I have so many songs stored in my head its crzy Thanks for shareing

[lolynbo]

JUST ANOTHER THING THATS GONE....LOOKED ON MY MYSPACE PAGE TO READ KOURTNEYS COMMENTS TO ME...THEY ARE GONE CANT FIND THEM..I GUESS ITS BEEN TOO LONG.....NOW IVE DEPRESSED MYSELF......HATE THIS FN LIFE

[ericasmom]

Colleen, thanks for the recipe, I was looking for a good recipe last week for granola...hooray, I will make yours.

Lorri, I am sorry, I know that you will miss having that. Is there any way that My Space folks could retrieve it for you? Make it a permanent thing?

Betsy, Downtown is a great song. In 1968 we moved from Chicago into the suburbs. I was an angry 12 year old, missing my city. So I sang downtown as though I was on stage with Petula Clark, "when you're alone and you're feeling alone, you can always go DOWNTOWN"

I still do that, when I am feeling down I go downtown and walk amongst the masses and go sit by the lake or go ice skating and let my troubles get shrunk down by the size of everything around me, making me realize that I am one tiny human in a giant world of humans. Somehow, I feel better in the midst of so many. More thoughts to your SIster in law, I wish they didn't have to go through so much.

Going to bed and hoping to wake up with a voice tomorrow. I am drinking some vinegar and warm water...still nothing.

Carol, how are you feeling these last few days? Are the medicines working any magic?

PS Trudi, what will your paper be about?

[mikesmum]

Dee - Hoping that the vinegar remedy works magic overnight.

The paper in 2 parts. First is the 800 word intro into stress, coping and the gender differences. Think I might have an idea ??? Have to cite sources for our report. No Wikipedia....never thought that was a recongised research site anyhow.

Its been over 15yrs since I worked at this level.

Well, back to searching databases and reading copious amounts of abstracts and research papers....should sleep well tonight....

[shorty16]

Greg's website is Angel Images

Searching on that should work

Colleen

[shorty16]

Trudi, you

Undergraduate in Psychology, you

WOW, Awesome.

I know I am nuts, so can I be your first patient?

Colleen

[shorty16]

Amy

I have never heard of a white tatoo. My daughter has 2 tatoo's both after her 18th birthday, because niether of us would sign.

Anyway, I like it, different and not so in-your-face.

Like someone else said - I do not like pain and would not enjoy a permanent mark on my body.

My son also wants a tatoo, and he will wait till he is 18 (which is in 8 months).

Tatoo's are a very personal thing - a forever mark - special.

Colleen, Brian's Mother Forever

[hotrod]

Good Morning Indigos

It is a fantastic warm day here in NYC. I am gong to drive to the beach and possibly see another seal

After nearly 4 years it is getting easier to celebrate Holidays

Here is a picture from St Pats. I had fun!!

[Guest msnher]

Good morning, Indigo's;

Beth - I want to add to others bravado for you! Reaching out like you are. That gives me so much hope for myself.

Trudi - If you're allowed to write a paper using your own experience and not other resources you should receive an instant A.

Konnie - Any news from Diane? Can you tell us?

Crystal - Ashlee's mom - hope you enjoyed your date last night. I'm not sure whom to be more upset with...Dylan or his parents. Have you ever met them? They just sound a little off to me.

Sharon - Shane is letting you know he's okay.

Rhonda - I have faith that your faith will be restored. If for no other reason than you want it to be. You, Karen and I seem to have followed the same grieving cycle/path within close proximatey of each other. I feel like I'm at a place of trusting again..so, you and Karen should follow shortly. Maybe.

Well, my mind has gone blank. I know there was more I wanted to say, but it's gone. Betsy I am keeping your family in my thoughts and prayers. Carol You're getting out and about, does that mean you're feeling better? Ummm, what's up with the extra small print? Did you get new glasses? LOve the pictures of the flower angels, Betsy.

WEll...all is gone.

love, Susannah/Stephanie's mom

[sadmomm]

Hi Dee , Susahnnah and all indigos. I am here. Just about the same. Reading but not much to say. Every morning the thoughts of his accident... And how forever is forever without him. Reliving my whole life. Wishing to change many aspects but cannot. love to all of you.. in all this pain... and forever loss... carrie

[westleysmom]

Trudi-Good luck on the paper. I went back to school in 1998 to get my master's degree and only took one class at the time mostly and it was very hard to get back into being a student. Keep up the good work!

Betty-Great picture. I'm glad you had a good time and are enjoying the "holidays" again. And the seal, that was so cool and one of the things I forgot to mention yesterday. I hope you get to see another one.

Amy-Thanks for putting the picture of the tattoo again. I'm still thinking on it. I live in a military town and getting one shouldn't be too hard once I make up my mind, I just can't commit just yet and like Colleen said, its forever.

Dee-Hope you have a voice today!

Lorri-So sorry about the Myspace page disappearing. I don't do any social networking thingies, so don't know anything at all about them.

Susannah-I'm with you, I thought I needed new glasses when I read Carol's post as I squinted at the screen. Thanks for the encouragement, I talked to God last night for a little while. I'm sure he probably wants me to go to timeout now for a while, but at least I'm talking to him.

Carrie-I know what you mean about wishing to change things. I hope that I'm not doing things now that someday I will want to change, and I'm not sure how successful I'm being. Hugs

I got a letter yesterday from Westley's friend that is in jail. He thanked us over and over again for what we've done for him and said that we are the only people that have been around for him since this all started. I think his other friends are tapped out, to tell the truth and can't help him right now. I want to reassure him that the people who care about him can't do this for him, and didn't do this to him. He made bad choices and is having to live with the consequences, which he knew beforehand. But I don't want him to give up hope that he can turn his life around, he's not even 21 for goodness sake. While I was fixing dinner last night, after I got the mail and read the letter, I was crying because I would give anything if that letter had been from Westley. Who would have ever dreamed that a letter from your son in jail would be considered the better thing to have than what you really have, which is a gravestone? If asked two years ago what it would be like to know that your son was in jail, I would have thought it was the worst thing ever. Maybe at the time that was true, but not anymore. This new reality sucks, you're right about that Lorri. He said that he would do his best to pay us back for what we've done, but I don't expect him to or even really want him to. We haven't done much, and I haven't done anything thinking he'll pay me back. That was one reason why we didn't bail him out when it all started, because we didn't think it was going to make any difference and he would feel obligated to pay us back. I think that's why his other friends can't help now, because they bailed him out to no avail, and spent all they had doing it. I do wish some of them would visit him, but I think they don't want to because that's all they can do and feel bad about it. Or maybe they really are mad at him, I'm not sure which it is. All I know is that we can be a good influence on him and try to help him as much as we can without encouraging him to become dependent on us. Does that make any sense at all? I would like to do something good for somebody, and it keeps me close to Westley's friends.

Well I hope everybody is having a good day and beautiful weather, although its cloudy here right now. But its supposed to get up to 80 degrees (apparently the two days of spring in TN are over now) Peace and hugs to you all

[ericasmom]

Still no voice, and I have heard of a few other adults with this laryngitis this week so it is probably the culminating event from the virus I brought home last Friday when I had a mild fever and a very sore throat...Oh well, the students are getting used to whispering back to me and reading my messages off the blackboard and dry erase board.

It is lovely out again today, not as warm but...cold is coming tonight so we will enjoy this for sure.

Hi Carrie, thanks for letting me see that you are out there.

I went to school in 1992 for my first degree, and I loved school then, went back for my masters and have taken many classes since then mostly in writing but not consecutively nor for a degree. Good luck Trudi, I think that it might be fun delving into a new venture.

Betty, love that photo and love the green. Your Irish Eyes were shining as were all the women at the table. Little one looks just like the woman(mom?) next to her. How cool is it to see a seal basking on the beach. Does she have a pup?

My car is in the shop, leaks galore, probably some of the nasty potholes I have struck...oh well.

[Guest msnher]

Carrie - Thanks for letting us know you're still around. I do worry about y'all when we don't hear from you.

Rhonda - I thought about you and Westley's friend a lot this week. I'm helping a woman who reminds me of Stephanie. She's in a difficult situation and I can't help but reach out to her. I will never know if I helped Stephanie too much (enabled) or if I wasn't there enough. Lord knows there were times in her life when I threw up my hands and said I can't do this anymore. I have to force myself to not compare this woman to Stephanie. There are so many similarities. It's fulfilling and heartbreaking all at the same time. I found myself wishing that Stephanie had the same determination this woman seems to have and then wondering if maybe Stephanie appeared to have that determination to outsiders. I gave her some money and we're going to let her use a car. Hell...we're buying an old car so she can use it. I'm not sure I would be doing this if she didn't remind me so much of my daughter. I hope my help isn't hurting her. I think I've lost all objectivity.

[Crystal16]

Amy- I love your tattoo… Colleen I look forward to seeing what you have decided to do with your tattoo. My half brother owns a tattoo shop and I’m waiting for him to come to Florida in May and Tat me one that signifies my Ashlee. I think I want a rose than have Ashlee’s name above it. The gentleman I am dating is a blessing for sure God knew I needed someone who was an encourager in my life right now. He rented a limo for this Sunday taking me to Fort Lauderdale to see Rod Stewart/Stevie Nicks in concert.

Sus- I hope the sadness has lifted some??? The date was fun Scott is hilarious he makes me belly laugh at times. I enjoy hanging out with him he’s an encourager loves helping people.

Yes Dylan’s parents are somewhat odd but Ashlee really liked them. When Ashlee was living with me I had Dylan come to my house so I could keep an eye on them but the ex husband was more concerned with himself that he let Ashlee hang over at Dylan’s house all the time. Dave was always gone, either working or partying all the time leaving Ashlee home alone on many evenings.

Crystal- If I die young song was requested by Ashlee months before she died that she had said to her cousin if she’d died young she wanted that song to play at her funeral which we did of course. The words Lord make me a rainbow, I’ll shine down on my mother she’ll know I’m safe with you when she stands under my colors. Oh, and, life ain’t always what you think it ought to be. No, ain’t even grey but she buries her baby. Every time, I hear those lyrics I cry it reminds me she’s okay… She’s also sent rainbows to me so I could feel her love.

Betsy- I’m praying for your sister.

Betty- Love the picture you look like you are enjoying yourself

Trudi- My thoughts exactly… need an expert for WHAT to prove Dylan’s a dumb ass. Congrats on your undergrad status… you go girl!

Carol- I’m glad to see that you are feeling better Hun just in time for Baseball season.

Rhonda- God knows you need some time to heal before you start a regular dialogue with him he's patient and will wait for you when your ready.

Dee- Sorry about your voice I pray for healing today for you.

[charsng1234]

Morning all my dear friends, its another day I have to face life again. I made it all day at work yesterday it was hard but I did it! I keep waiting for a sign form Shane I ask god always to help shane find me.As I look at his pictures and his ashes in that wooden box I think this is all I have left after 22 years??? How did my world come to this?? I hate my life now I really try to be some what of a human its so hard. Well I am going to try to get to work today, thanks Trudi,Dee. Susannah,amy, betty,lorri, Carrie,Krystal. I hope I did not miss anyone.. All have a blessed day.. Sharon Shanes mom!!

[westleysmom]

Sharon-So proud of you for sticking it out all day at work. Most people have no idea how hard that can be.

Susannah-I had written to Susan about the situation with Westley's friend. One of Andrew's (her son that died) friends had worked for them in the hardware store and after Andrew's death, they hired him back since they were short handed. He had some drug issues, I think and they ended up having to let him go. So that didn't work out for them too well, and I asked her advice. She said that she didn't regret giving him a second chance and still sent him a note every now and then that they still believed in him and to never give up trying to get his life back on track. And that if we had the means to help, that maybe the help from an someone that didn't have a hidden agenda, who really wanted the best for him might turn him around...and it might not. That its a chance you take that it won't turn out like you planned, but isn't everything? So we're staying in touch since he needs the moral support right now and he's never asked me for anything. Money or otherwise, except that he did ask me to visit him and I have and will as long as I can handle it. Maybe we couldn't see our children objectively and it is easier to draw the line with others than it was with them. I don't think either of us are doing more harm than good at this point. At least I hope not.

[shorty16]

Rhonda

That is the question I ask myself before I make big decisions "Is this decision going to hurt anyone or hurt me in any way?" It may not help, but it sure won't hurt. The thought process has helped me through alot.

Keep us informed on Westley's friend.

Colleen, Brian's Mother Forever

[shorty16]

Sharon

You did great - a whole day at work - wonderful. Keep up the good work. Please remember we sometimes take 2 steps forward and 3 steps back. If that happens, it is OK. It is normal and you should not be dissappointed in yourself at all.

We can decide who we let into our life and who we do not. That little bit of control really makes a difference. If I see someone I have not seen and will not see very often, I do not talk about Brian other than happy things. If I see someone who will be in my life, I do let then know, because that is who I am now. We all really dislike this new life, but we have learned to make our happiness in it.

Wierd how that works.

Colleen, Brian's Mother Forever

[shorty16]

Crystal,

I laughed out loud at your post. With "my" tatoo. I will never get a tatoo - I am too chicken. My daughter and son are into them, but not me.

Thanks for making me laugh.

Colleen, Brian's Mother Forever

[briansdad]

Here are the styles PM me if you want to order some.

[Crystal16]

Colleen- I'm glad I could make you laugh. It doesn't hurt that bad I'm sure you could do it.

[charsng1234]

I would love to get a sticker anyone know how I can get one? Thanks sharon.. Shanes mom...

[mysonrich]

For those of you that are up before the dawn, up all night and up and down all night:

http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2011/03/110318-supermoon-earth-japan-earthquake-tsunami-science-space-biggest-full-moon/?source=link_fb20110318biggestmoon

A really nice day today. Near 73 and the sun is shinning.

Sarah,Rich nor myself have tattoos. I have had bouts of psoriasis since the year after Rich was born. After the divorce it went away completely and now flares up under stress. There is a new med, injections at home with one very bad side affect, live damage. I'll stick with light therapy. Leah, if your reading I remember someone on your family suffered from this. There are new treatments.Sarah and Rich never wanted tattoos. I guess they just never had an interest . There are beautiful works of art on people but like others, there is also the pain factor.

Betty, looks like a good day had by all. Where did you see the seal, NJ or NY?

Dee, hope the voice is back soon. A challenge to teach without no doubt

I had a request from my aunt yesterday. She mentioned that it has been almost a year since she started the process of buying,design, placement of her and hubby's headstone. She wanted to know if I would take her to the office to complete the order. WELL. I don't know what is wrong with people. She has 4 kids and again, they can't find the time. I have no problem taking her but as I told her, I don't feel its my place. Guess I need to make a phone call. She won't. Don't ask me why. She has decisions to make which I feel should be shared with and by her kids. I just don't get it.

Sharon, that was a big step you took today. Take time for yourself throughout the day . A quiet,private spot helped me. As Colleen said, it is sometimes 2 steps forward , 1 back. Be kind to yourself.

Rhonda, decisions. Sometimes I just hate making them especially when trying to please many.

MY brother called. His wife has 4 grown daughters. I think 3 live in North Dakota. Maybe Utah. 1 in FL. 3 daughters are now there. He is getting some much needed rest,not that its very restful.

[lolynbo]

Summer Rain Quillen

Big Spring, Texas — Summer Rain Quillen, 9, of Big Spring, died on Sunday, March 13, 2011, in Madill, Oklahoma. Funeral services will be held at 2 p.m. Thursday, March 17, 2011, at the Nalley-Pickle & Welch Rosewood Chapel with Eddy Pitchford, minister of Coahoma Church of Christ, officiating. Interment will follow at Trinity Memorial Park.

The family will receive friends from 4 p.m. to 6 p.m. today at the funeral home.

Summer was born on August 28, 2001, in Big Spring and was attending the fourth grade at Bauer Magnet School. Summer loved her family, God and singing. She brightened everyone’s life that she touched. She was a member of Coahoma Church of Christ.

Summer is survived by her mother and daddy, Sara and Eric McCall of Big Spring; her father, Laramie Genn of Ardmore, Oklahoma; two brothers, Gaven Quillen and Caden Williams both of Big Spring; two

Another lil angel GONE TOO SOON...KILLED ON 4 WHEELER...MY MOM WAS WORKING AT IHOP THIS MORN WHEN THIS LIL GIRLS GRANDPARENTS CAME IN AND TOLD HER THAT THEY BURIED THIER LIL GRAND DAUGHTER YEST...THEY KNEW MY MOM HAD LOST KOURTNEY AND DIDNT WANT TO TELL HER BUT.....MOM SAID SHE JUST STOOD THERE IN IHOP AND CRIED WITH THEM....SO SAD...

[mysonrich]

That is so sad Lorri. There are 2 boys, early 20's, that ride around here. I so much want to stop them and warn them of the dangers. So sorry for you Mom.

just wanted to share. this morning I woke up and thought I must have really over slept. It was light out. Oh no, I'm late. it was around 4 and it was the moon. Going to try to catch the sight in the morning.

[mikesmum]

Ah yes the moon. I have always believed I am child of the moon and the ocean. Wished I'd been at the bay last night, but hey I had the moon.

Lorri - another angel, another grandparent burying a grandchild. If it hurts this much losing your child, I can't imagine what it feels like to outlive your grandchildren.

Amy - Love the tattoo. Never had one before. The boys both did. On Mikes birthday cant remember the year I had a chain with a cross and his name on my wrist done. Didn't feel a thing. Then in Oct last year I had the dragonfly added to the cross.....the dragon fly a symbol for me of life albeit brief.

Betsy - I know she has 4 kids, but sometimes you want to be with someone 'who gets it' and blood relatives aren't always the ones. Wish you well with the headstone.

Colleen - I think the prerequiste for this course was to be certifiable.....and I believe I'm over qualified

To all ~ may the weather warm your bones and lighten your heart...

Back to the books.....OMG...big words and all.

[Guest msnher]

Calling all Angels.....

[Guest msnher]

I can only imagine...

[Guest msnher]

I hope you dance...

[Guest msnher]

It's a wonderful world...

[Guest msnher]

I believe....

[Guest msnher]

Sending love and light...

I believe.

Susannah/Stephanie's mom

[Guest msnher]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W49H4UYClCM&feature=related

Hello God...

Last one.

[ericasmom]

and I will add my pick of the night for beautiful tunes...

Thanks for the music Sus, you were in a mood to share and I thank you.

Betty, love the whole Giant Moon information. I talked to the kids about it today, well wait, I wrote about it on the board and showed them an article about it.

Carol, I hope not seeing you only means that you are busy with Davis and you are catching up on rest afterwards.

Bonnie, thinking of you strongly today, wishing you well with lots to smile about.

Betsy, I am glad that your Brother can rest a bit while others are sitting with your Sis-in-law. What giant sadness.

Trud, good luck on the research and on Mal's Birthday.

Sharon, a whole day at work is nothing to sneeze at, that is great that you were able to attend that long. HOw do the folks at work treat you?

Lorri, how damn sad that is that the little one died on a four wheeler. She was only 10, is there some law that says kids of any age can ride? what sadness for them. I am glad taht your Mom was the person the grandparents went to, knowing that she may be their support system in all of this. Prayers.

Night all, we have some out of town folks coming tomorrow, were supposed to come tonight but one of them has laryngitis...but there are two young ones coming and to tell you the truth, I am glad that it is reduced to one night rather than two as I don't sleep well with kids in the house...worry that they may wake up adn fall down stairs...on and on go my worries.

Anyhow, to bed to rest, I am pooped out.

Good night