Loss of an Adult Child

[dawnray]

[user=19401]heartbeataway[/user] wrote:

I want to throw some questions out to you guys .....

If you could choose ONE thing that reminds you of your child, what would it be?

A particular sign?  A particular car?  A word?  A poem?  A saying?

What color would you associate with your child?

If you could choose something to symbolize your child, what would you choose?

This would be hard for me too! 

I think I would choose the word, honor, for the answer to the first question.

After he left, his friends put a tattoo together choosing letters from words that he had written to form the word, HONOR and added his "signature", JH, beneath the word.  I never hear or see the word that I don't think of him.

Sweet!

For the answer to the second question, I really want to choose two colors, blue & white, because his "uniform" was blue jeans and a white t-shirt.

But, since it's only one, I would choose the blue.  His eyes were such a pretty blue ......

For question three, the first thing that popped into my mind was "sunshine". I like to say he was, "scrubbed in sunshine".  

first off let me say hello to everyone.

And to answer those questions i would have to say one thing that reminds me of my son when it see it is a guitar EJ loved his guitar and would play it everyday.

what color do i associate with EJ well there would be 2 that is red and black they were his 2 favorite colors and everytime i see that color combination i think of him.

what i would choose to symbolize Ej i would have to say a really big heart becuase that is EJ he was always looking out for everyone else he was so kind and a friend to everyone no matter what .

[mikesmum]

Claudia - Many thanks.   I know your mind and heart are centering on Patricks day and what that brings to you - you are in my thoughts as you make your way 'back' to be with family and friends.....enjoy the Tapioca and that last fitting..precious.

Ironically, before he became 'debilitated" for want of better words he worked with a group called Anglicare.  His work with the kids who for whatever reason were on the edge an overloaded overworked system of child service care....not many guys were in the field due.  Mike made it through the scrutiny & screening. I believe he bought much to the lives of those kids and prevented the young boys in his care falling through the cracks.

Dawnray - love those things that reflect Danny to you.........Makes me smile when I see his face....

 

[4everjoeysmom]

And many thanks to you, Trudi, My Friend!!

Such a sweet, sweet thing to hold onto--even tho the system let your boy fall through, Michael Shane prevented many other boys from falling through the cracks. Though it doesn't bring Michael back, it certainly put his legacy forward very strongly. I wonder if any of those children think of him?? I imagine they do.

I am getting very excited about seeing my family. I leave here in less than two weeks, on the 14th, on a red-eye flight. I plan to spend that afternoon at a mall, walking and window-shopping until I am exhausted so that hopefully I will be able to sleep on the flight. I haven't flown a red-eye since I went to London in 2004. I've gained a few years since then.

Dawn Ray, Love the avatar picture of your son, EJ!! Guitars are wonderful!!! Blessings and Hugs!!

And to all, Blessings and HUGS!!! Love, Claudia

[heartbeataway]

Claudia,

Your excitement is contagious and I'm not even going anywhere!

Trudi,

I haven't even been able to browse through pictures or videos. I can't imagine revisiting these details! But, I think the idea of bringing awareness would give me strength.

That's why Pinnacle Days is so important. If we can prevent someone else from "falling through the cracks" and experiencing this pain, ........... this God awful until I die pain.

Lynn,

Dustin?

Dawn Ray,

It's good to see you back!  We all need to take a break once in a while.

Lyn,

 Have you watched the video from the reunion?  We didn't forget to say Danny's name!

[mpsmom]

Dawn Ray, go see the video as well, we took EJ with us to Minneapolis...

Marcia    Bethany's Mom Forever

[katant]

Hi everyone.  Long two weeks.  Came for a visit and tears have filled my eyes reading what I missed during these past few days.

 

[user=19401]heartbeataway[/user] wrote:

If you could choose ONE thing that reminds you of your child, what would it be?

A particular sign?  A particular car? Red Saturn  A word?  A poem?  A saying?

What color would you associate with your child?

Anthony's favorite colors where Red and black and it reminds me always of him.

If you could choose something to symbolize your child, what would you choose?

I have a tattoo on my wrist with Anthony's name and stars and a butterfly.  I also have a tattoo on my ankle that Anthony actually sketched himself and I had it copied exactly and put on my ankle.  We added his name on the bottom...beautiful.

One thing? A black and yellow butterfly that seems to visit my sister 17 miles away from me and then later in the day, it's visiting me....makes me smile. 

A word? Hey Bud...luv u.  We told each other every day we loved each other.  Even his last day, we spent the morning together, said goodbye,,a hug and goodbye and later that day he called me for no reason, again...love ya bud...goodbye. 

A saying? Holla at ur boy.  He said that when ever I would call for him.  I would say.."hey Ant"  he would answer every time..."Holla at ur boy".  my god, makes me actually laugh....holla............

[katant]

That is an actual picture of the butterfly

[ericasmom]

Dawn and Kat, welcome back, so nice to see you here, the smiles of your Beautiful Boys. I know the road is a tough one, so I am glad to see you are hanging out, pushing forward. Love the butterfly, it is a swallowtail, I think an eastern prairie swallowtail, we have them each spring and summer, and I love them. They truly flutter-by. I have a great many photos of them, my husband makes fun of me as to how many photos of swallowtails and giant bees I have taken. They do amaze.

 The summer of ERi's leaving we had more butterflies than ever, and dragonflies. WE get many each year, but boy that year, tons. This summer, six years after her death, we have had many sightings of hummingbirds. We do not use feeders, just the types of flowers we plant. They love the balck and blue salvia, red salvia, rose of sharon, bee balm, canna, and trumpet vine. Gorgeous and less shy as the summer finds its end.

Ok, went for a wonderful walk this evening, do almost each evening, and while walking I felt anxious that I should be able to easily identify those things that are symbolic of Erica. But there are so many. Oh and definitly Bob Marly, redemption song adn three bird. Oh, my little white rasta, is what they called ERi in Kalamazoo.

 The evening alone is a symbol of ERica as she loved the night hours, it was when she was truly awake, her senses ready for the next exciting moment. But the light that is cast in the evening reminds me of Eri, the sunset colors, the ways the clouds catch the light and the un-namable kinds of blue that occur during those moments of sunset to twilight. (ERICA BLUE SKY). Oh, those colors are all about the Girl who loved the night. So I guess one symbol of ERz is the sunset. Another sign, strangely enough, is the train whistle. She and I always loved the sound of the train, the rhythm of the wheels on track, and the whistle, a big hello sound. We talked about it from the time that she was little, whenever we went somewhere where we heard a train, that she loved that sound, and I always said, me too.

Erica's color hands-down is  PINK. Eri loved pink. Her cheeks wore a pale pink with a brush of freckles. That pink, that is the color of Eri, with her bluespruce eyes and dark dark eyelashes and brows. Everyone wore pink to her funeral, some pink of some sort, the church was a sea of pink.

My little Tinkerbell is who I think about, is who I speak to each day. Tink, Twink, that is my ERi, the little magical being that flies about and lends her light and her magic whenever possible.

So tomorrow I may answer again, and my answers may be different, however, that won't mean that today's answers won't still be correct, it's just that each day, there are more pieces of life that bring me bits of ERi.

blessings and hope,

dee

[mikesmomrs]

A lengthy post, but that is what happens when I turn to BI in the wee hours...a chance to chat with friends who truly understand and care...my apologies...

Bonnie:  your thought-provoking questions…so many answers---as Dee has said, my answers tomorrow may be different from today, but that won’t make the ones I give today wrong…it’s just there were so many facets to Mike, so many likes, so many things that he associated with…Bob Marley, sure, definitely; and his iPod is still listened to by his wife…same songs, more added, but Bob Marley is still securely positioned on the dial of that IPod;  as well as that of his nephew/brother Davis, and of course his sister Cathi’s…all ready to bring back that light, heart-happy music he so loved… the color  as he told me in those last days… “how could I pick one color…there are so many, it depends on my mood, on what I am doing or thinking about.”  Gently pushed for an answer of only one, he came up with red.  Symbols reminding us of Mike, oh, man, there are too many…red VW’s, of course, but music would have to be at the top of the list---any and all…reggae, rock, metal, Phish, G.Dead  lived and breathed in his very soul;  Weezer (“Island in the Sun” was his and Sarah’s “song” and played at their wedding); the Beatles were in his mind and on his iPod---all phases, all songs that they put forth…plus C&W, classical, all of it, every genre;  and his kids…growing, speeding towards adulthood…his older two forming their little personalities into those of adolescents---the middle one, Kameron, a carbon copy of his dad, right down to the freckles and the disposition, the big heart, the gentleness;  the youngest---determined, independent, so savvy…the other day his mom went into the other room to use the computer and was growling about the process, and hearing her, Damon called in “Mommy, are you having trouble uploading those pictures again?”  This from a four year old!!!!

I have loved reading everyone else’s responses…Bonnie, this was a good idea, these questions…how thoughtful of you to create them…thank you so much…tears, yes, but joy also, as we share these etchings in our lives of our special angels…loved your “scrubbed in sunshine” description of Jason!

Lyn:  So glad to see your sweet Danny’s smile again…and I am also glad for your major step on this journey…as Claudia said, those gut-wrenching days may still surface, but they won’t be as defeating, so painful as before…somehow we strengthen our hearts to gird ourselves against them…

DawnRay—so good to see your EJ again, and hear from you again…and yes, it is necessary sometimes to step back, but glad you have let us know how you are…

Trudi:  “falling through the cracks,”  that is what was intimated when we questioned the fact that the lesion on his brain was seen on Mike’s MRI years before the tumor became cancerous…it “fell through the cracks”…follow up wasn’t done as requested…”one doctor thought the other was doing it, the “other” thought the other was doing it”…too late now…gggrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!  I am glad your Mike’s doctor is being investigated…though I am so very sorry this is all having to be played through your mind (and heart) again…

Dee:  Loved your story of your walk and your thoughts of Eri and the answers to Bonnie’s questions…I was telling my hubby today of your story of your little daydreamer…he said he was happy to know that your students have you as a teacher…I am, too…they are blessed!

Marcia:  Bethany knows that you are living up to her verse…you are a mom to be so proud of…I loved the story of your providing shoes for those kids…what a wonderful thing to do…and the sharing of Bethany’s being “mad” at her teacher for having a baby…precious!

Colleen:  I liked your idea of laminating some lyrics to put in Brian’s shadowbox…we haven’t yet created Mike’s, but that is such a nice idea…I would like to use it…do you mind?  Of course, it will be difficult to choose, but maybe we will choose more than one song…

Claudia:  Thinking of you as you prepare to return to the states…I know that there is bittersweetness involved, but once you see Patrick again, your heart will be overjoyed…I know that you will do Joey proud with the outcome of your poem for the table done in his honor…I love “Joey MonCcey!” as I am sure that golden Joey did also…

Lorri:  I know what you mean about everything reminding you of Kourtney…and I am so glad that you managed to have fun on the cruise…you know that Kourt was with you…I loved the story of “Kourtney Rose”…what a wonderful way for her to let you know she was right there with you…

Katant:  loved the butterfly story...only our angels...

Kathy:  How is Tavian adjusting to the return to home, school, etc…?  and how are YOU doing?

Kay:  are you out there? okay?   Shelly:  I hope all is going well with your trip and you are managing things okay…  Lynn:  still holding Dustin and his family in my prayers…keeping vigil with you all…is there any way of homing in on his cell phone’s location?  Pam--hope you are doing okay, and it is okay to just read, if that is where our needs are...just know that we are thinking of you and your Kenny...  Maryann: thinking of you and Brian; Sonya:  hope all is well with you...missing your sweet Danielle's smile... Cindy:  thinking also of you and your Tanner...hope I haven't left anyone out...but think of all my BI friends every day in my prayers...

Greg:  Thinking of you as you begin these  “reminder” days of your precious son Brian…although every day is a day filled with thoughts of him, these days tend to bring about the saddest of those thoughts…

 I don’t recall if it was you or Dan who had mentioned some time ago about someone doing the memorial for the rear window of your car for Brian or Nick…we have decided to do one, but have no idea what kind (vinyl dye-cut or something like that, or a vinyl patch with the wording on it, etc.)…I think you had mentioned the person who did yours…did you?  If so, could you give me the name of the company?  Thanks so much. 

The weather here has been really beautiful, and though it does brighten my mood, the one sad thing that for some strange reason it does is also make me notice so much more so than usual the young families when they are out and about…seeing young men driving, their family in the car with them, or walking around, just makes my heart ache so, wanting to see Mike out and about with his wife and kids, enjoying the day, shopping, getting read for back to school, loving, being…tears…

Well, my eyelids are finally beginning to droop, so I will say goodnight to all…

Love and peace,  carol  mikesmomrs

[dannysmomma]

[user=30061]dawnray[/user] wrote:

[user=19401]heartbeataway[/user] wrote:

I want to throw some questions out to you guys .....

If you could choose ONE thing that reminds you of your child, what would it be?

A particular sign?  A particular car?  A word?  A poem?  A saying?

What color would you associate with your child?

If you could choose something to symbolize your child, what would you choose?

This would be hard for me too! 

I think I would choose the word, honor, for the answer to the first question.

After he left, his friends put a tattoo together choosing letters from words that he had written to form the word, HONOR and added his "signature", JH, beneath the word.  I never hear or see the word that I don't think of him.

Sweet!

For the answer to the second question, I really want to choose two colors, blue & white, because his "uniform" was blue jeans and a white t-shirt.

But, since it's only one, I would choose the blue.  His eyes were such a pretty blue ......

For question three, the first thing that popped into my mind was "sunshine". I like to say he was, "scrubbed in sunshine".  

first off let me say hello to everyone.

And to answer those questions i would have to say one thing that reminds me of my son when it see it is a guitar EJ loved his guitar and would play it everyday.

what color do i associate with EJ well there would be 2 that is red and black they were his 2 favorite colors and everytime i see that color combination i think of him.

what i would choose to symbolize Ej i would have to say a really big heart becuase that is EJ he was always looking out for everyone else he was so kind and a friend to everyone no matter what .

This is a hard one.Danny had so many different facets to his personality.I think watching Dakota playing XBox.He and Danny would play together all the time,they were game buddies, and it was always an adventure watching the two of them,they always has so much fun.There are 2 colors actually yellow and red.His drawings usually predominantly done in those 2.Danny's symbols..courage,determination and a HUGE smiley face

[dannysmomma]

Thanks for the greetings all:)School is back on=more computer time..lol.I watched the re-union video and pics ..looks like everyone had a great time.Wish I could have made the trip also but having a toddler to contend with well...lol.It's been beautiful here in Md..didn't think I'd ever say that again ..turned off the AC and gave the house a good airing out.We had a visitor this summer to our pond...a pretty turquoise dragonfly...I told the kids the story about dragonflies which I'll post and they thought it was the coolest thing.He'd fly up an inch from your face and just hover...this summer went by waaay too fast but looking forward to the fall.{{{hugs}}                                                 Dragonfly

Spiritual Story by Unknown

Once, in a little pond, in the muddy water under the lily pads, there lived a little water beetle in a community of water beetles. They lived a simple and comfortable life in the pond with few disturbances and interruptions.

Once in a while, sadness would come to the community when one of their fellow beetles would climb the stem of a lily pad and would never be seen again. They knew when this happened; their friend was dead, gone forever.

Then, one day, one little water beetle felt an irresistible urge to climb up that stem. However, he was determined that he would not leave forever. He would come back and tell his friends what he had found at the top.

When he reached the top and climbed out of the water onto the surface of the lily pad, he was so tired, and the sun felt so warm, that he decided he must take a nap. As he slept, his body changed and when he woke up, he had turned into a beautiful blue-tailed dragonfly with broad wings and a slender body designed for flying.

So, fly he did! And, as he soared he saw the beauty of a whole new world and a far superior way of life to what he had never known existed.

Then he remembered his beetle friends and how they were thinking by now he was dead. He wanted to go back to tell them, and explain to them that he was now more alive than he had ever been before. His life had been fulfilled rather than ended.

But, his new body would not go down into the water. He could not get back to tell his friends the good news. Then he understood that their time would come, when they, too, would know what he now knew.

So, he raised his wings and flew off into his joyous new life!

[shorty16]

Carol,

Feel free to laminate!?!?!?!  The idea came from one of Brian's friends.

EJ's Mom - Red and Black were Brian's favorite colors also.

Brian loved to snowboard, wrestle, skateboard, etc.  Anything physical - he was very coordinated (and a risk taker)

Bonnie - What a great question - Can't wait to take part in Pinnicle Days.  I am bringing the lights from the boards we made in Minn.  They keep turning on at different times - really wierd and freaking me out.

Colleen, Brian's Mother Forever

[daniellemom]

If you could choose ONE thing that reminds you of your child, what would it be?

I would have to say flip-flops and rap music. She loved them both.

What color would you associate with your child? Pink and Blue; Pink because she wore pink a lot and blue because her eyes are a beautiful blue. When she was little if someone asked were she got those blue eyes she would say Sears! Too funny.

If you could choose something to symbolize your child, what would you choose? Laughter, she loved to laugh and play.

Thank you so much Bonnie for asking these questions, I love reading all the responses.

Sonya (Danielle's Mom)

[ericasmom]

Dawn, I love that story of the dragonfly. Thanks so much.

Another thing that represents Erz- snowboards she too was very physical and coordinated,

yet another,Nordstroms and Aldo Shoes.

Yes, laughter like crazy.

oh my.

We are making self portraits today, these are wonderful. I am seeing how they see themselves.

Love,

dee

[ericasmom]

Bonn, I too loved that you said Jay was scrubbed by sunshine. What a perfect way to describe that smiling Son.

[lolynbo]

WHEN I DESIFFER (SP) IT "KOURTNIE ROSE"    AS I SAID I WAS THERE WITH A ROOM FULL OF PPL WHEN SHE PASSED...AND WE SAW HER IN HER GLOWING MOMENTS SHE WAS "RISING" SO I KNOW IN MY HEART "KOURTNEY ROSE"..

[daniellemom]

Can someone please help me find the video of the trip to MN?

Sonya (Danielle's Mom)

[mpsmom]

Sonya, go to the thread http://beyondindigo.com/forums/view_topic.php?id=1042&forum_id=2    it is under loss of a child,  says 'reunion' there are only a few posts there with pics and the video..

Marcia    BEthanys Mom Forever

[daniellemom]

Thanks Marcia!

[4everjoeysmom]

Poem for the memorial table at the wedding... I found it in a wedding web site and rewrote it to fit our occasion very personally. What do you think?

We wish you could be here with us

This very special day,

As you were to be our Best Man

Before you went away.

This candle burns just like a star

That we might bring you here a while,

As we remember your bright flame,

Your laughter and your smile.

We wish that you could share this day

Our union and our happiness,

But knowing that you knew our joy

Makes today so very blessed.

Even though you aren’t here with us,

Your presence is still strong,

As in our hearts we'll always find

Your love has never gone.

We miss you, Joey…

(signed With Love by the Bride & Groom)

I can't even read it out loud!!

[mpsmom]

Claudia it is PERFECT !!!!!!!!!!! Joey will be there... and he will love the poem.

Love, Marcia    Bethany's Mom Forever

[homeschoolmom]

Hi guys! Feels like I've been gone a lifetime or two. Read through all the posts though, and everything is jumbled in my brain. Rabbit trail- does anyone else have a hard time keeping stuff straight or even not feeling overwhelmed when the slightest thing go wrong? I have all the best intentions, but follow-through is something else.

Anyway, Claudia, thinking of you as you count down the days. The guys are digging away at the marl and stones in the back to make room for a stone deck. There was a set of abandoned stone stairs under Brianna's room which is now a 12x9 room- Tony's dog house aka his tool room. They are finishing up with the concrete work and should be tiling in the next few days. The bunks are in and had a few calls about the boarding, but no definites yet. I'm sort of waffling between starting now, or starting later and returning to Fl to pack our stuff and ship the majority of our furniture. Of course we would then have to decide what to do about the house....

On our way to the airport, we had a tire blowout on the interstate.  Suffice it to say that apart from a jolt to our hearts, we were okay.  My brother-in-law and his wife and two boys were with us.  We were in my van which has been locked in the garage since January. By the time we were a few minutes from the airport, the van starts vibrating really hard again. He left me at the curb and headed for the nearest tire shop.  The other tire had started peeling just like the first! Talk about scary stuff.  And all the time I had been driving in the nights, on lonely roads thinking the vibration was from a needed alignment that I would take care of on my next visit. Rohan probably thought I would come see him with a suitcase or two loaded up with homework!

Lorrie, how was Jamaica?

Dee, loved your story of your little wool-gatherer.

Bonnie, so sorry about your nephew(?).  As others have said, you were doing the right thing and you cannot hold yourself responsible for someone else's morals, or in this case, lack thereof. Praying for peace for you.  As the old folks here would say, "he is like a dog who bit the hand that fed him." No offense to the wonderful doggies here!

Lyn, sorry about the back to back shifts. Remember when I got three 12s in a row... Hope you get some well-earned rest soon.

Trudi, praying for strength and peace to you,

Kathy, I don't recall reading that Tavian was back yet, but hoping for a return that just wipes all the fears and anxieties away, and restores your heart and mind. The only time I ever went "camping" was in the army... perhaps we should go one day.

DannysMomma (Lynn?) Hope I got the names right, glad to see you back, and to see Danny's face.  still remember that saying...something about some heroes are made not born, even if it is only in your heart? Did I get it right?

Greg, Briansdad, loved the pics of the angel of hope...don't know if you all know this, but there is a willow tree angel called angel of hope...by Susan Lordi...I started collecting these figurines some years ago.

To all, blessings and peace,

Shelly, Rohan's Mama

[daniellemom]

Claudia!! I love the poem it's beautiful Joey will be there with you.

Have you picked a day for Terri and I to come see you?

Sonya (Danielle's Mom)

[homeschoolmom]

Claudia,

So sorry you even had to write this poem. It is beautiful, but made me sad for all the "what might have beens..."

Shelly

[briansdad]

[user=16030]4everjoeysmom[/user] wrote:

Poem for the memorial table at the wedding... I found it in a wedding web site and rewrote it to fit our occasion very personally. What do you think?

We wish you could be here with us

This very special day,

As you were to be our Best Man

Before you went away.

This candle burns just like a star

That we might bring you here a while,

As we remember your bright flame,

Your laughter and your smile.

We wish that you could share this day

Our union and our happiness,

But knowing that you knew our joy

Makes today so very blessed.

Even though you aren’t here with us,

Your presence is still strong,

As in our hearts we'll always find

Your love has never gone.

We miss you, Joey…

(signed With Love by the Bride & Groom)

I can't even read it out loud!

Great Poem,

I wish my daughter in law would have been receptive to something like that. We were lucky to get Brian in a picture at the wedding.

Greg

[mpsmom]

loved the pics of the angel of hope...don't know if you all know this, but there is a willow tree angel called angel of hope...by Susan Lordi...I started collecting these figurines some years ago.

Shelley, Just a few months after Bethany died,one of our patients brought this same Angel of Hope you are talking about ---in for me at the office, if you have seen her, she looks just like my baby girl, long dark hair, dark skin, hair parted in the same place and her head tipped just a little--- I have her sitting on my desk at the office, right next to a picture I have had there of Bethany  for a long while, head tipped, ponytailed, the same look..... amazing the resemblance for me.   

Marcia   Bethany's Mom Forever  

[homeschoolmom]

Marcia, isn't that the most awesome thing?   I love my angels. Have the angel of freedom here on my bedside table.  She is holding a butterfly about to set it free.  That is what I am trying to do with my Rohan, set him free, but loving him all the while.

Shelly

[4everjoeysmom]

Yes, Greg. I'm so sorry that your D-I-L was not more open to this for the sake of your family. My son's bride is the one that actually asked me about a memorial table. She's been very thoughtful concerning how he will feel on that day. Our family is very fortunate to have that kind of unity... Thank you for commenting. I always appreciate your input.

More in bit. Need to go and put supper on the stove. Tilapia!! ~C

[mikesmum]

Claudia - This is one sweet girl - Joey will be there, watch the flame..You know we will all be with you holding you as you see your son marry with all the emotions that will come with that day...

Colleen - Yeah Pinnicle Days - wish I had the bottomless bank account I would be there in a 'heartbeat'.  Did you get my email with the pics from our 'big day out'?

Dee - Caleb just did that same activity - they were asked to draw themselves and then they did cutouts and decorated it.  He was of course Batman wings and all!

Well off to cook, yes I said cook.  I'm providing afternoon tea for a group of Melissa's friends.  We are having a 'Body Shop' party.  I'm also bringing a bottle of 'Blush' a lovely pink bubbly just to keep the party on an even keel.......

Take Care all - Trudi

[heartbeataway]

OMG Lorri,

 

"So I know in my heart ...... Kourtney Rose"

Wow .........

This is the poem that was on the inside cover of Jay's Memory card at the funeral home. It was written by a grieving Mom to her daughter ......

We changed it a little for Jay. 

But never the less, I love the words and think you will too.

[align=center]Rise up slowly .......

Rise up slowly, Angel.

I can not let you go.

Just drift softly midst the faces,

In sorrow, now bent low.

Ease the searing anger,

born in harsh unyielding truth,

That death could steal my loved one

From the glowing blush of youth.

Rise up slowly, Angel.

Do not leave me here alone,

Where the warmth of mortal essence

Lies replaced by cold, hard stone.

Speak to me in breezes whispered

Through the drying leaves.

And caress my brow with raindrops

Filtered by the sheltering trees.

Rise up slowly, Angel.

For I cannot hear the song

Which calls you through the shadows

Into the light beyond.

Wrap me in a downy cape

Of sunshine, warm with love.

And kiss a tear-stained mother's face

With moonlight from above.

Then wait for me at sunset,

In The Cove you held so dear

And guide me safely homeward

To your world, which lies beyond.

Just spread your arms to take me

In reunion's sweet embrace.

And we shall soar, together

To a different time and place.

Diane Robertson

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[ericasmom]

Beautiful poem Bon, I either read it here once before or somewhere else and each time cry my eyes out. So very sad and so very close to our hearts. Lori, I love that you deciphered, Kourtney Rose as she rose from her illness to perfection.

Love you all,

dee

[briansdad]

Were off in the morning for Table Rock Lake. We have done it every year since Brian was a baby. Now we take his baby

[mpsmom]

Greg, Isnt she a doll???????? I am so glad you have family traditions that you are able to share with your sweet little angel.  Have  great time, we are off for the weekend to a place called Angels Gate,(never been there) camping in an animal sanctuary on the edge of Zion nat'l park.  Should be a beautiful place, peaceful I hope, trying to make 'new' memories....

Have a safe weekend,   Marcia    Bethany's Mom Forever

[ericasmom]

Greg, Jan, have a sweet time, going to a place that brings such fine memories, times that I know, you would not trade for anything. Taking your Grandgirl must make Brian mighty proud of you, his parents, for continuing on with tradition. I hope the sun shines in the September blue skies for the whole trip. Peace to you,

dee

[ericasmom]

Marcia, I hope that you and Larry will also enjoy a fantastically beautiful weekend, and that new experiences might bring with them, signs from your Angel at Angel's Gate.

Love,

dee

[briansdad]

[user=24749]mpsmom[/user] wrote:

Greg, Isnt she a doll???????? I am so glad you have family traditions that you are able to share with your sweet little angel.  Have  great time, we are off for the weekend to a place called Angels Gate,(never been there) camping in an animal sanctuary on the edge of Zion nat'l park.  Should be a beautiful place, peaceful I hope, trying to make 'new' memories....

Have a safe weekend,   Marcia    Bethany's Mom Forever

Marcia,

That's a picture of Brian

[homeschoolmom]

Greg and Marcia that was too funny!!  I thought the pic was of a boy, too, but when I read about your trip, just assumed it was your granddaughter.  Enjoy, both of you, and may you come back refreshed and rejuvenated.

To all, have a wonderful, peace-filled day,

Shelly, Rohan's Mama

[zachysmom]

For those of you who want to get to know my heavenly angel here you go.

Zachy is a big flirt and has been since he was a baby. He even flirted with the nurses the day after he was born. At the age of 9 months he grabbed the chest of my friends' daughter. He always would chase the girls and no female of any age was safe from his flirtatous attitude. Young or old he would have any female wrapped around his little finger.

Zachy loved school. He threw a fit when his preschool teacher tried to hold him back another year. We of course didn't let it happen. I actually made the teacher realize he was manipulating her by acting like he didn't know his letters and numbers. Once she knew what he doing she changed her mind about keeping him back again. Also how many teachers would admit they were manipulated by a 5 year old He was suposed to start kindergarten this year. Every day he kept bugging us to go register him for kindergarten when we did he was estatic. He bragged to everyone. It was funny.

[daveydow1]

Bonnie----Thanks so much for the  "Rise Up Slowly " poem. It is beautiful.

Sherry

[mikesmomrs]

Beth:  thank you for sharing some of your precious Zachy with us...he is just adorable...you can see that little flirtatious look in his eyes...I know it hurts sometimes to remember those moments that are burned into our memories, but eventually, talking about them will soften the pain; talking about your child will help, Beth, it really will, and here, you can talk all you want about your child...we are always here, ready to listen...

Marcia and Greg...have a wonderful time, Marcia on a new adventure, creating new memories, and Greg, carrying on tradition, each finding some solace, some joy, in your journey.  "Angels Gate" sounds like a wonderful place to be Marcia, I know that Bethany will be there with you every moment.  And Greg, we know that Brian is always with you, wherever you are with his sweet little one. 

Bonnie...I too had read the poem before, but it is always welcomed to my heart...the words ring a souldful joy and remind us of the eventual reunion with our precious children. 

Claudia:  I love the poem you created for Joey for Patrick's wedding...I know the excitement is building for your trip...I wish I lived closer to NC so we could meet up, but I am so glad for you that you are experiencing this trip and that your future DIL is so understanding and ready to take that extra step to acknowledge her husband-to-be's brother in this hugely important day in her and Patrick's life.  Safe traveling...

love and peace,  carol  mikesmomrs

[zachysmom]

This is the poem we chose for our angel.

Little Angels

When God calls little children to dwell with him above,

We mortals sometime question the wisdom of his love.

For no heartache compares

With the death of one small child

Who does so much to make our world

Seem wonderful and mild.

Perhaps God tires of calling the aged to His fold,

So he picks a rosebud before it can grow old.

God know how much we need them,

And so He takes but few

To make the land of Heaven

More beautiful to view.

Believing this is difficult

Still somehow we must try,

The saddest word mankind knows

Will always be " Goodbye" .

So when a little child departs,

We who are left behind,

Must realize God loves children,

Angels are hard to find.

As soon as I saw this at the funeral home I knew my angel wanted this one.

[ericasmom]

Beth, thanks so much for sharing ZAchy with us. He is beautiful, and I know you miss him so very much. We love getting to know each other's Children. Erica was 19 when she died, she was killed by a train at a broken crossing. The Amtrak hit her car, she lived for 5 more days following that day, though never awake again. Eri has been gone for 6 years, and while it seems impossible to get through that many years without your Child, you will. Sherry and both lost our children the same summer, and while we suffered as each parent does, we are still standing, because we need to be. We are still here and so we must live as best we can and shine the light of our Babies on the world. I promise that as time goes by, eventually, life will begin to take on a new order.

Peace and love,

dee

[shorty16]

Greg,

Those younger-age pictures of our Brian's really bring back wonderful memories.  My Brian was a ball of fire.  No fear.  He rode a 2 wheeler at 3 years old.  Was swimming at 5.  There was not a day that went by that Brian did not make me smile (until he learned how to drive).

Thanks for sharing your Brian with us.  Cuttie

Colleen

[shorty16]

Hey Everyone

The weather in Wisconsin is BEAUTIFULL - Mark this on your calendars.

The entire weekend without: rain, snow, wind, cold, cloudy, ice-storms, etc.

Dee - You should be in this weather too!?!

I am going to bottle-up this weather and take it with me to Virginia for Jason's Pinnacle Days. - Right Bonnie?!?!

Colleen, Brian's Mother Forever.

[ericasmom]

I am so jealous Co, that yo are going to Pinaccle Days, make sure that you hug Bonnie for me okay? And Bonnie, make sure that you hug Co for me, and if Sonya goes, both of you hug her for me. Thanks. Yes, the days have been perfectly beautiful colleen, so fine, so lovely.

My Eri was riding a two wheeler at 3 years as well, no training wheels, and swimming at 3 years as well, well dog paddling. And she was ice-skating at 2, no double blades, just going round and round the rink so fast and able...she skied and snowboarded with ease, a black diamond girl.

Oh Eri, I miss you, you loved this weather too. The call of the bluejays reminds me of you, cause you loved that sound too. The bluejays squawked on fall days most, and so we knew it was autumn coming on the call of the jays. I am a bit melancholy today, missing Erz and today is My Mom's brithday. She left the summer before ERi.

A great long wekend to you all,

dee

[lolynbo]

THOUGHT YAL NEEDED A LAUGH..THIS REALLY HAPPENED TO KIMBERLY THIS MORNING ALL BEFORE 7:30AM

1. SHE LEAVES THE HOUSE HAS TO TAKE CODY CAR BECAUSE SHE OF COURSE HAS NO GAS, CODY (MY SON IN LAW) TELLS HER THERE IS ENOUGH GAS TO GET TO HER WORK

2. SHE RUNS OUTTA GAS 3 BLOCKS BEFORE HER WORK, A NICE MAN IN LINEN SUIT STOPS TO HELP HER. AS HE IS STANDING BY THE CAR SHE FORGETS TO PUT IT IN PARK, SHE RUNS AFTER THE CAR AND HE DOES TOO, THE MAN FALLS IN A MUD PUDDLE AND SHE RUNS HIM OVER (HE IS OK JUST WET AND DIRTY)

3. AS SHE SHUTS THE DOOR TO THE CAR THAT RAN OUT OF GAS SHE SHUTS THE NICE MANS HAND IN THE DOOR...OOPS

4. THEY GET TO THE GAS STATION AND SHE FORGETS HER WALLET, NICE MAN HAS TO BUY THE GAS AND A GAS CAN FOR DINGGY BLONDE (PLATNUM) AS THEY ARE GETTING GAS. THE GAS SPEWS ALL OVER AND GET KIMBERLY ALL WET FROM TOP TO BOTTOM.

SHE STINKS FOR THE REST OF THE DAY, THIS IS ALL BEFORE 7 30...MY POOR DAUGHTER...I BET IT WAS LIKE WATCHING LUCY AND ETHEL...

HOPE KIMBERLY MADE U LAUGH.....

[mpsmom]

Lorrie,, OMG !!!!!!!!!!!!! laughed so hard i thought i was gonna pee my pants... Next time can you follow her around with a video camera????    OMG , poor girl, I hope she was laughing too.... I'll be that guy never stops to help a pretty young blonde again...

Love You, Marcia   Bethanys Mom Forever

[daniellemom]

Beth – Thank you so much for sharing your Zachy with us. What a beautiful boy! So sorry you have to be here with us, but glad you found us. I really like the poem you attached. I lost my daughter Danielle almost 2 years ago. I’m still standing trying very hard to live life to the fullest for her and the rest of my family. It’s hard to do but we must try and we succeed.

Colleen: I’m also planning to attend Pinnacle Days with Bonnie. Can’t wait to meet you. Are you flying or driving? Are you going to camp or get a hotel room?

Greg – Have fun on your trip and enjoy that beautiful daughter of Brian’s and give her extra hugs and spoil her a little bit more for me please.

Marcia – Have fun on your trip to Angel’s Gate is sounds beautiful.

I’m staying at home this weekend out of necessity not because I want to. My husband’s brother is getting married and they decided to give the bride a shower this weekend so no last beach trip for me this season. Unless I can think of something for next weekend.

On a positive note! James is coming home this weekend!!!! I’m so excited about it.

Dee – My love to you my dear friend! Happy Birthday Dee’s Mom! So glad that your school year is going well so far. Mattie tells me she is bored already with school. What to do, what to do???

Love and peace to all of you on this holiday weekend.

Sonya (Danielle’s Mom)

[daniellemom]

Lorrie - Just read your post!! Too funny!! The poor guy. Glad Kimberly made it to work and what is she going to do to poor Cody?

Sonya (Danielle's Mom)

[lostwoher]

Good afternoon All. Such a blah day for me today but it sure helps to come here and see pictures and poems and to know everyone is moving about. Work has been pure torture this week. Trust me when I say that drug stores should NOT being doing flu shots. This is the most unorganized fiasco I have had to deal with. The walgreens corporate gurus did not learn anything from the chaos last year and has added even more crap to go along with it this year. More and more expectations from us and absolutely nothing in return except to say "hey, look at the profit"! As I recall, the gov took most of my profit away last year. Dont worry, thats all the ranting I will do about the government and my job.

Today I recieved the finalizing papers to sign for the design of Kayla's headstone and plate. Its perfect but it sure brought me to my knees. Strange because I knew it was coming so I didnt expect the reaction. Its such an emotional day. Today also is the 7 day mark that Dustin has been missing. Still no sign of life. Searchers have been out everyday covering alot of ground. Im trying to muster up the strength/courage to help this weekend. I really dont think Im capable to face the parents or his girlfriend as so many of you have done. I know and feel their pain but Im so afraid of being one of the idiots to say the wrong thing but yet I want to be there for them. Will see what the morning brings then decide. To answer a question earlier about tracking his cell- its at home along with his wallet and car. Cant go into details about all I know but acquaintances that have been questioned have suddenly disappeared. This isnt their first rodeo if you know what I mean. Will post more when I know more and what I can. Thank you so much for the prayers for the Englebrecht family.

Everybody have a great weekend and make some wonderful new memories.

Love to ALL,

Lynn