Guests Guest msnher Posted July 22, 2011 Guests Report Share Posted July 22, 2011 Sally - I sent my phone # to you on facebook in your messages. No pressure to call. Just want you to have it...in case. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members briansdad Posted July 22, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 22, 2011 Sally,I'm not sure how to respond other than I'm so sorry your husband was in such pain to have to relieve it the way he did.I hope all of you at some point can come to grips with this loss as you did with your son. I wish there was something that could be said to help you along but I know there is not. I'm just so sorry. This really touches me deeply because it very well could have been me a few years back and for whatever reason I didn't do it. The bond between a man and his son is something I can't explain.Just know that your boy was there to meet his Dad and all of you will be together someday.Greg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ericasmom Posted July 22, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 22, 2011 Betsy, the house behind my son and nephews is my neighbors, our home is wood, and brighter yellow. My neighbors are having chimney work done today, a man on the roof outside this window...big storms came this morn, now gone and a bit cooler, but it will be monday before we have real relief from this heat. So Betsy and all of you east of here, maybe tuesday for you. Drink a ton of water... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mysonrich Posted July 22, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 22, 2011 NJ 3PM EST....103. RealFeel 117. So I am shopping winter boots again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ericasmom Posted July 22, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 22, 2011 Yep, that is what we had yesterday...today there is relief of sorts but not on the humidity.The temp is lower from the storms that moved through, but I just came home from a 2 mile walk, could not power walk for much of it as the humidity and air quality are too hard on the body. My shirt is soaked from perspiration, but still, to be outside exercising felt so good as the last four days we have been indoors for much of each day.Love that you are looking for winter boots.My favorite: earthkeepers boots. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members daveydow1 Posted July 22, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 22, 2011 Dee----I agree......the humidity is hard to deal with. I hope that the storms you had this a.m.will be heading our way soon. I have ventured out to the garden to check things out, andpick some lettuce and a few beets.......then back into the house and down to the basement family room where it's much cooler. The new dehumidifier is sure getting a workout. Lorrie-----How are you coming along with your recuperation ?.......better I hope.Betsy------Some choice on the poll, huh ??? Severe winter or sweltering heat !!! Don't think Iwould vote either. Thanks for your comment on Davey's pic with the rubber boots & raincoatat Niagara Falls. Yep, he looked almost "lost' in that stuff, but I think he liked the experience.Sorry it's so hot there.......we're still broiling here, too. Leah----I think that you did the right thing......showing the children where the accident happened,that took sweet JaBoa's life. Reassuring children after a death of a sibling or relative is neveran easy thing to do. Good to hear your mom is doing OK. Sending prayers, friend.Greg-----Alyssa is so pretty and talented. As others have said.......Brian is surely smiling downon his baby girl and happy she is becoming such a sweet, talented little young lady.Sally-----I sure do wish I had words to soothe your sorrow right now, but I don't believe thereare any words to say.......just know that everyone here is so very sorry for the devastation andsadness that you have right now. Thoughts & prayers for you and the children in this timeof your great sorrow. Your sweet Joshua and his father are surely together now. May you and your family somehow find some peace. We, in the BI family, are here for you, friend. PEACE TO ALL Davey&Lisasmom, Sherry Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mikesmomrs Posted July 22, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 22, 2011 104 degrees here, in the shade. Our thermometer is in the shade, under an awning. I was out earlier trying to keep my plants from withering away. I had to just leave the hose there under the trees (we put new evergreens in summer before last and they are essentially still establishing their roots, so can't let them wither), so they could get a good soaking. Used my sprinkling can to do the others so I don't use too much water. We have been indoors all day, though Ralph went out this morning to pick up Damon, and our index was like yours, Betsy, 117! Fortunately, the humidity came down and it dried out somewhat but still too hot to venture out. Oh, I dread my AC bill, but am so glad we have it!Sally, I am so very, very sorry for the loss of your husband. My prayers are with you and your children and your husband's family, especially his mom. The heartbreak this brings to all is devestating, and I am so sorry that your husband suffered so that he felt he could no longer stay here...his pain must have been monumental. I wish words could help you and your children, but none do and just please know that we are all praying for your family that peace may find you and give you comfort. Greg: Alyssa is charming and beautiful...a delight and we know that Brian is so very proud of her, and of you. Thanks so much for sharing. Sherry: Good that you were able to go out for a bit and do some picking...if that rain heads your way, it may reduce the heat a bit. I forgot to ask you that if you want me to send you a copy of the restored pics, pm me with your regular email and I will send them. I can't send them with a pm from BI, unfortunately. Lorri: Out and about yet? I hope you are feeling better. Susannah, you too...Kathy: That is so great about Jessica's friends going out with you, sharing and remembering. I am sure she was right there with all of you. Dee: I could not walk in this heat...the sweating comes just thinking about doing that. How is your sweet "Garden Gnome" doing? Give him a hug for me. Bonnie: I do hope that the authorities made the right decision regarding returning your little pink bundle...I know that the days spent with you and Rich were blessed days for her and for both of you. Your sunshine-faced boy is very proud of his beautiful parents. Trudi: What is the temp like down under about now? Have you finished the break with the grandies? I think, from what you've said before, that you are back at the beach now for a couple of weeks...if so, I pray you find peace and comfort from the remaining time there, enough to last for a while. Yesterday was Davis's 26th birthday...this past week has been a true roller coastser for me, and I do think his passing birthdays are part of that...remiinders that he will one day pass his "bruncle" (as Mike used to refer to himself regarding Davis, since they basically grew up together) in years. Another is likely that Mike's early to mid-twenties wre a tumultuous time for him (and consequently, us) and Davis is not having an easy time of this time of his life...reminders, reminders. We did manage to have a good birthday for him, though, and he had a sweet day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ericasmom Posted July 23, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 23, 2011 Oh Man Carol and all of you in the triple digits, all I can say is make some ice tea and get a good book to read, it is indoors for a few days. Glad that you were able to water the ones needing it most. Our temps went back up into the 90's today after a few hours with 80's and the humidity is just awful, so please take good care of yourselves and stay cool. Have a plan in case the power goes out so that you can find a cool place. We did get 1.5 inches of rain today, much needed. Lorri, how long till you go cruising with the clan? Give that Kody and big happy birthday from me. Love that Boy. His sister is smiling on him as he grows up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members summergirl Posted July 23, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 23, 2011 Thank you again for the beautiful birthday words for my Jessica....Dan - the picture is beautiful - jess and roses, her favorite...It was 101 degrees here today...worst I have ever seen it....Have Damien for the weekend so hubby and I took them to the ocean for a nice swim to cool off...it was so nice there with a cooling breeze...a few more days of this they are saying so I guess we will be living at the beach...Sally - I am so sorry for the loss of your husband and the fact that he took his own life.....as Trudi said there are some who just cannot cope with the loss of a child but they have no idea the pain they leave behind...I guess when you get to the point of taking your own life you are not thinking of anything or anyone except your own pain. I will keep you and your children in my prayers and saying Joshua's name out loud !!I honestly don't think I have the energy to even post anymore as the heat is getting to me....boys are relaxing watching tv and hubby on his computer so I think I will grab a cold drink and read for a bit. Love, strength and Peace to all, Kathy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members lolynbo Posted July 23, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 23, 2011 WELL RODE TO DALLAS TODAY TO GET MY CAR SERVICED AND TO EAT AT JOES CRAB SHACK...THEN DID FEW MORE ERRANDS BUT MOSTLY WAITED AT MERCEDES PLACE...KODYS GIFT DIDNT COME CUZ NO ONE WAS AT THE SHOP TO SIGN FOR IT, HEARD HIM TELL DAD "PRETTY MUCH HAD A MERCEDES BENZ BDAY "......GUESS IT SUCKED...MY FAULT......FELT GOOD TO GET OUT BUT IDK WHEN THESE DAMN LORTABS WILL LEAVE MY SYSTEM, STILL TWEEKN ON THOSE....BUT ALL IN ALL I FEEL OK TODAY...YES KOURTNEY WAS WITH KODY TODAY, SHE LOVED HIM SO, HER BB BROTHER....SURE MISSN HER TODAY AS WELL AS EVERYDAY....SIGNED BY MOM THAT DROPPED THE BDAY BALL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mikesmum Posted July 23, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 23, 2011 This really touches me deeply because it very well could have been me a few years back and for whatever reason I didn't do it. The bond between a man and his son is something I can't explain.Just know that your boy was there to meet his Dad and all of you will be together someday.Sally - Glad to hear you managed some rest. These next days, weeks will be tough, but you already know that. The kids will grieve in their own way, they will grieve differently again than when Joshua left. You are constantly in my thoughts. Carol - We have our own heat wave...Its a sweltering 13C here, sunny but don't stand still in the shade or you might just freeze.Lorri - You baby is 19, OMG he's such a cute boy. To still spend time with his family, sharing his own milestones as he does is something to be cherished...Kathy - I love that Barry now has the energy and inclination to 'beach it up' with Tavian and his friends. I don't think moving to the beach is a bad thing, but then again I'm biased Carol - Davis 26. Its hard not to think of that age in relation to where you were with Mike back then. Gotta hope his Bruncle is with him hopefully navigating him through some of the harder times to a better safer future. Hope the AC bill isn't too bad. As for the ocean, well I have been thwarted this past week and haven't made it out of Healesville. There seems to be a theory though not spoken out loud that if I'm coming back, I'm okay, don't need the ocean and so I'm available to the level I once was. Not sayin I'm not, but you know its harder to keep pace.Having said this I will share a picture of the Grandies from our Zoo adventure. This is a Morton Bay Fig tree in the middle of the zoo...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ericasmom Posted July 23, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 23, 2011 okay weird, i wrote a post last night responding to Trudi's and Carols, and it is not here...there is a message bandit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guests Guest msnher Posted July 23, 2011 Guests Report Share Posted July 23, 2011 Happy Birthday, Colleen!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guests Guest msnher Posted July 23, 2011 Guests Report Share Posted July 23, 2011 Just saying hello to y'all. I hope each of you find a bit of peace, hope and comfort during the next 24 hours. Much love,Susannah/Stephanie's mom Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members shorty16 Posted July 23, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 23, 2011 I am sending my prayers to those parents in Norway who lost their children to a Right Wing Christian. What the heck is that!!!I am sick that innocent children are the target of such sicknessJesus is crying in heaven right now.Colleen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members shorty16 Posted July 23, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 23, 2011 Yes, I turn 48 years young today!!! Scott and I went to see Jersey Boys last night at the Milwaukee Peforming Arts center. It was wonderful.Sending my love to all the indigos and asking our angels to welcome those new children to heaven. Colleen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members lolynbo Posted July 23, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 23, 2011 HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRIANS MOMMY...HAVE A BLESSED DAY Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members lolynbo Posted July 23, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 23, 2011 KODY RIDING BIRTHDAY SHARK STICK AT JOES CRAB SHACK YEST....LOL SORRY PIC WONT POST INFACT NON WILL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ericasmom Posted July 23, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 23, 2011 Happy Birthday Ms. Colleen, how young you are, I remember 48, it was some time ago. Have a good time being 48 and all your ages from here on out. I am happy to hear that you and Scott went out and enjoyed the show last evening. I just went with Shannon, Jonathan's girl, to get some patio furniture to put out at their back porch. Her Dad adn his fiance' are coming to town from Louisiana next week so she wants to make the place look good. We had fun picking things out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mikesmomrs Posted July 23, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 23, 2011 YAY 48!!! YAY COLLEEN!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ONE AWESOME LADY!!!Your sweet self is so special, and I too am so glad that you and Scott had a special night out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mikesmum Posted July 23, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 23, 2011 I am sending my prayers to those parents in Norway who lost their children to a Right Wing Christian. What the heck is that!!!I am sick that innocent children are the target of such sicknessJesus is crying in heaven right now.Colleen Colleen ~ Woke to this story unfolding and aside from the absolute horror the phrase "right wing christian" stumped me. Does that make it any less horrific? Not sure that you can explain his actions with that phrase. Apparently his 'reasons' will be revealed when he fronts court. Prayers for thunderbolts and lightening.Oh yeah I remember 48....went by like a speeding train. So glad you and Scott had a wonderful night out. Jersey Boys played here, but unfortunately I missed it. I know you are all going through a large heatwave so I wont bother telling you I'm in woollen jumper with thermals underneath about to put on a coat, scarf and gloves to walk Sir MD who is also rugged up..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ericasmom Posted July 24, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 24, 2011 Forgot to tell you that we got 6.85 inches of rain last night, so our garden has been under water all day, the pump doing its best to empty our garden, but in the meantime, it attracted all sorts of large dragonflies, heaven's messengers, and later I will try to post a little video.The tragedy in Oslo as it unfolded yesterday into today has me on needles. I don't understand the violent streak in some that somehow justify taking the lives of others like that. How the hell are those parents supposed to trust anything in the world again, and those survivors, what are they to do with the images they saw, the friends that they lost, the panic that now lives in their DNA? Bastard killer, i am hating him for all he stole in his sick moment of power. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members hotrod Posted July 24, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 24, 2011 Good Eveing IndigosI have just returned from Atlantic City and NYC is sweltering!!!!!! Sally I am so very very sorry to hear of the sadness that has visited your home You and your family are in my prayersTrudie. Sus, Dee and Colleen I join you in my thoughts and prayers for all touched by the events in NorwayThis on a personnel note I mourn the loss of Amy Winehouse at the age of 27. She could not recover from the effects of alcoholism and drug addiction . What a terrible disease!!!Colleen Happy Birthday dear lady. You deserve a grand celebration. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members aim630 Posted July 24, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 24, 2011 Happy Birthday, Colleen!We're at Ohio University Orientation. In just over one month we'll be dropping her off. not looking forward to that. Ashley's boyfriend's mom sent Katie a graduation card with a note. Matt's cousin 's fiancé died in a car accident one day before their wedding on July 1st. I had told her how this website saved my life, so she is going to tell his mom about us. I hope she can come her and find some comfort. she said Matt has been trying to console his cousin, who is also named Ashley.Such sadness in Norway. My heart goes out to all of the parents and families.I've been reading every day, just don't have the words to say much right now. Thinking of you all,Amy/Ashley's mom Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members briansdad Posted July 24, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 24, 2011 I played golf today. Yes GOLF in 100 degree weather. I was at the course that Brian and I played not two weeks before he died.I remember we took Alyssa. I had hit a really crappy shot, hit the ground with the club and said a bad word. She looked at her Dad and said " I think somebody needs a nap."It's little things like this that keeps me going. Memories where I can think of my buddy and smile.Well what I began to tell you all was I had Dragon Flys all over the place while I played. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guests Guest msnher Posted July 24, 2011 Guests Report Share Posted July 24, 2011 With all the hate, sorrow and depression in the world, I still believe in the power of love and kindness. Hope. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ericasmom Posted July 24, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 24, 2011 Greg, love that Heaven's messengers were all around you today...wonderful. And I too Sus, believe that there is more good to celebrate than bad to be afraid of. But I am sick of those who change lives so negatively because they get caught up in a moment, in a fantasy...Betty, yes, you went home in the heat of NYC that is leaving here, though still in the 90's today after nearly 7 inces of rain today alone, 2. 5 yesterday so in two days we have over 8 inches of rain. Due to the way our nighbors yards and driveways are tilted, our yard takes the water from three homes...and our yard slopes down low so a natural pull for the area's water. DAng it might rain some more toning.Betty, I agree, sadness to see Amy Winehous not be able to pull herself out of that tangle, proving that no matter the money, no matter the kind of rehab, the addiction is so strong for some that it takes them away. Bless her talented soul.Amy, I know it is very bittersweet for you to be taking Katie for freshman orientation, but I am so happy for her to have this opportunity. I also am saddened by the news of Ashley's boyfriend's cousin, how incredibly sad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ericasmom Posted July 24, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 24, 2011 trying to post some rain soaked garden photos, the videos don't want to attach. it is thundering and lightning again, hope for just a brief shower, not the deluge of last night. Peaceful dreams All, and hope for a brighter calmer tomorrow.first photo, the house in the backgound is our neighbor's but scroll down and bottom left of frame, are the wings of a dragonfly hanging onto a plant, a bee balm. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guests Guest msnher Posted July 24, 2011 Guests Report Share Posted July 24, 2011 Good morning Indigo's;I slept the whole night through! First time since I broke my rib. I am healing nicely. Over did it for a couple of days so I rested yesterday.My statement about love and kindness, Dee, was more for my benefit than anyone else's. It is so easy for me to sink into despair and depression when I see all the pain and sorrow. I get a "why try?" attitude. I regret that it took someone else's tragedy to shock me to my senses, but that is what happened. Sally's husband's death, Jeff, forced me to look into the eyes of my grandchildren, my husband, my surviving children and ask myself what it is they see when they look into mine. It was another layer of the onion of life. A new redefining who I am. Who I want to be. I got out of bed, where I've spent most of the last two years, and honestly examined myself. "You grieved well." I smiled at myself in the mirror. The evidence of my grief is all around me. The new paint, the short hair....the additional 50 pounds I now cart around on my behind. My grief is evident in my flower garden which has been overtaken by weeds. Tall, dead grass - proof of my neglect - sways in the breeze instead of the different colors that usually adorn my garden. I don't know the names of the flowers I plant. I just plant them. There is so much ugly in the world and my focus has been on it for far too long...........it's time for me to notice - really notice - the beauty.Much love, Susannah/Stephanie's mom Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members shorty16 Posted July 24, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 24, 2011 Good morning indigosI am still so sad for the parents of Norway. If I had more money I would fly there and offer my knowledge on this grief journey.Greg - "Someone needs a nap" is too funny. Those are the memories that keep us smiling later in this journey.Dee - 6.5 inches of rain WOW. We got rain, but no where near that much. Sus - Keep smiling my friend. This is a journey, not a destination. smiling, crying, loving are all part of the journey. Keep truckin my friend.Thinking of my angels today and always.Colleen, Brian's Mother Forever Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ericasmom Posted July 24, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 24, 2011 I wish you well Sus on noticing the beauty all around, it is in plain site but grief can and does cloud so much for most who go through such deep loss. When we begin to emerge from the tunnels we kind of operate in during the first few years of grief, we notice things anew, sometimes seeing in technicolor and hearing in surround sound as we open up to the possibilities that exist. Col, I know, those folks are going to need a great deal of assistance getting their hearts and minds around what has happened to their once peaceful country. Like 911 here, the world for them has changed, a point in time, altered by the hatred of a few. Yes, in two days over 8 inches of rain, but I think for now anyway, our rain has stopped, the skies are getting lighter, the wind is picking up a bit which will help dry things out, and tomorrow we have been promised normal temperatures for the time of year; in the 80's. Hooray. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members lolynbo Posted July 24, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 24, 2011 NO RAIN HERE SOOOO DRY, ON WATER RATIONS, EVEN ODD DAY STUFF....KODY RACED BUT HAD OIL LEAK SO DIDNT ACTUALLY RACE, I STAYED HOME STILL UNABLE TO GET OUT..IDK WHAT I WAS THINKING I THOUGHT ID BE AROUND BY NOW, I AM AROUND BUT STILL SORE...GET MY STITCHES OUT TUES...MAYBE KOURTNEYS KLOSET THURSDAY IDKYCRUISE IS IN 26 DAYS...I WONT BE 100% BUT SURELY I WILL BE A SMIDGE BETTER THEN I STARTED OFF BEING...MISSING MY LIL BUDDY TODAY SO MUCH, HOW CAN THIS BE, HOW IS THIS MY LIFE, HOW IS IT SHES MOVED ON ALREADY AND LEFT ME HERE?...SUCKS... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ericasmom Posted July 24, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 24, 2011 I know Lor, it is hard to fathom that this life is our own sometimes. Hey, feel better, I know you must look great, you already did and now...va va va voom! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mikesmum Posted July 24, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 24, 2011 Hey Indigos. I am taking a 'no news' break over the next days. The imagery, the outpouring of human suffering in Oslo tempered with the 'ravings' of the man who inflicted so much on so many is something that I find I cannot handle. Same with the 'comments' by those who have no idea on why Amy Winehouse died so young. For me Amy reflected just how fragile the human condition is regardless of talent, money or 'having it all'. The assault on the senses watching the news readers run through the gauntlet of emotions in a 5 min news grab is too much. This morning it was the darkness of Oslo, the tragedy of Amy then a breath of sunshine Cadel Evans wins the Tour De France.....a roller coaster in full colour.I find I am in my own loop of emotional rollercoastering. Sunshine smiles as I walk the puppy through town, hugs and empathy as my step sons partner finds she's not pregnant but now the owner of a 3cm ovarian cyst, then the depths of darkness that come from having lost a child, offset by being blessed to still have children and grandchildren. But my rants here save me somewhat...they give me a chance to purge my sadness, look for the light and for that I am thankful.The Oslo idiot is quoted as saying 'we gave peace a chance and now its time for action' or words to that affect. Peace is all we have ~ Violence intolerance and anger costs far too much and achieves far to little....Well the dog needs out....I need coffee.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guests Guest msnher Posted July 24, 2011 Guests Report Share Posted July 24, 2011 Trudi - ditto. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ericasmom Posted July 24, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 24, 2011 Coffee sounds good right about now on this sunday evening. I am opting for ice sun tea, wild berry. I cleaned the christmas bins today, went through them adn got rid of any and all that I no longer want or will use. I kept only those things dear to my heart and to my husband's heart. Reduced then from three giant plastic bins to one for tree decorations, one for lights that we are keeping just in case we put some up one year, and one container for all the gift bags we own. I still will one day need to go through the bin of dolls I have kept of Eri's, the stuffed animals from both of my kids, the boxes of clothing I just could never part with from their childhood...but for today, two hours in that cobwebby dark dusty damp place is quite enough. I feel itchy with the thought of many spiders.Trudi, the break from the news is something I spoke to my nephew, Mike, about the other night, even before the jerk in OSLO hit. He said that at his age, early 30's, he should be part of the solution and should be watching the news to be abreast of things but that he found himself becoming too sad from it all. He has a young son, and just does not feel he can give away his energy to that kind of negativity. I told him that I understood, I do. I too just can't listen for long as I get so blazing mad, so uncontrollably sad. Last evening John and I watched a really good movie (the visitor), and it made me think even more about the situation in areas such as Oslo and other countries that are allowing more immigration to their worlds, a good thing, and what we in America sometimes do when others immigrate here, that supposed land of the free and opportunity. I love my country, but when folks in Texas, and so many states, many other states, can walk around with a gun and it is okay, it is legal, and we ship out folks who are basically working their asses off for minimum wage, doing jobs that have always been available due to so many americans unwilling to do those jobs, well, you have to wonder where the right wing is taking us. That dude in OSLO was a right wing extremist, so are many of the gun-toting americans who claim to love God and Jesus as they call a black man a nigger and a mexican migrant worker a wetback. That is not the same God that I pray to day in and day out.I know what my direction is each year at school, to teach peaceful ways to resolve issues in our world...God and Eri and all of our Angels and all the new Angels please direct my teaching to the best of my ability. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members wyomingsal Posted July 25, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 25, 2011 Hello everyone. Thank you all for the prayers. 2 of my sisters and my nephew arrived to help and they are such a support. They are cleaning my house and my church is bringing meals. I love my family. The funeral is set for Wednesday at 2pm. I'm still in shock but feeling better with family here to distract me for a little while. Jeff's family will be in Tuesday and leave on Wednesday. I am hoping his mom isn't misplacing her sadness into blaming me but I can't help that if she does. This is not a time for blame but for supporting one another and I am trying to be as supportive as I can because I know what it is to lose a son. But I also have my own grief and my children to look after. Jeff's sister didn't want a photo presentation at the memorial but I really do. So I am going to try to compromise and have it going while people are coming in and then Jeff's family if they don't want to see them can always come in right a the start of the funeral and not see the pictures. Susannah: It often seems that when we see the trials of others around us it can help us see life through new eyes. I hated being that person having a trial when Joshua died and here I am again. Romans 8:28 says that "all things work together for the good of those who love the Lord and are called according to its purpose." I am thankful if God uses this circumstance in your life and I know He will work these horrible events and things for good. My husband is with our dear son and with my Lord Jesus. He is healed from all his pain and afflictions. I am going to miss him more then he knows. I am going to expect God's work and protection in the life of my children. Blessings to you and I pray God's joy and peace for you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ericasmom Posted July 25, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 25, 2011 Sally, I am happy for your support in your sisters and nephew. I think that it is important for you to provide the kind of service you feel is best for you and the Kids, and so if a photo montage is part of that, good for you to do it. where are your Sis in law and Mom in law from? Blessings to you as you you embark on this new road, I know that you will feel God's hand helping you up those steep hills. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guests Guest msnher Posted July 25, 2011 Guests Report Share Posted July 25, 2011 Sally - You are a woman of wisdom and compassion. I am glad your faith is strong. Surely that will help carry you through the certain low spots ahead. I admire your patience and understanding towards Jeff's family and I admire more the knowledge that you have to proceed with what is right for you and your children. I continue to hold you close in prayer.Susannah/Stephanie's mom Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members heartbeataway Posted July 25, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 25, 2011 Sally,Sending you and your family my deepest condolences. Such a sad tragedy.Our baby girl went home last Thursday ..... sad day at our house. The judge decided that wasn't imminent threat to life or health so no reason to keep her in care. This child had eczema so bad on her little body when I picked her up that some areas were seeping. She also had cradle cap and thrush. She was so uncomfortable and her little nails so long she was scratching herself badly. She was in good shape by the time she went home. You could still see some of the bad areas of eczema but she wasn't uncomfortable. The dark circles under her eyes were gone and replaced by a sparkle. I can only pray for the best for this sweet baby girl. I have a large bone growth on the top of my right foot. That's being taken care of Wednesday. Then on Thursday is training for new Bereaved Parent chapter leaders. I've been waiting so long to get this going that I'm not going to miss it. Hope the pain level from the surgery will be lower than the doctor indicates. I'm excited to meet Rosemary and also Cindy Bullens. The documentary, Space Between Breaths, was one I watched many times. Pinnacle Days is shaping up to be a great time. We found favor as the band we wanted were booked on the Saturday we needed them. They rearranged their schedule and will now play! We have someone donating the generator and also the paper products. We may also be getting a break on the porta john rentals. Not used to getting this kind of help but very grateful for it. We are expecting our largest attendance of between 300 - 350. To add some fun, we are having an old fashioned truck on Sunday morning that serves fresh homemade cinnamon donuts and coffee! This event is something Jason would love! Sad that he will only be attending in Spirit ...... Well, off to bed ...... busy week ahead. Love! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ericasmom Posted July 25, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 25, 2011 Bonnie, I am so sorry that you had to give back that lovely beautiful girl but happy for her to have had that sense of care and devotion from you and Rich. A sparkle replacing he circles under her eyes...you helped her heal, you gave her a memory of how it is to be treated well. Maybe they will see her as a happier child and take more care of her, at least we can pray that. I know your hearts must be wrung out in many ways. Bone growth on your foot must be painful. Is this outpatient surgery? Please be careful, but I do see why you don't want to miss the leaders training. Just take good care of yourself. Sounds like Pinacle Days is going to be ENORMOUS this year and how nice for you all to gather on that old mountain with Jason's smile leading everyone there. It will be grand.Peace to All, good rest, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mikesmum Posted July 25, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 25, 2011 Sally strength to you as you navigate this coming week. I think your idea for the montage of photos is a good compromise. I am so glad your faith holds you in good stead. Having family to distract will be somewhat of a blessing. I am also glad that you have a strong church support. Will be thinking of you.Bonnie - Of course she left with a smile and a twinkle, I am sure she was wrapped in sunshine and bundled in love. I remember the 'Spaces Between Breaths'. I remember you sent it at a time when life was so dark for me. It now has a place in the Compassionate Friends here, though I don't go, I know there are many who have seen this DVD and gain some insight into this journey. Good luck with the surgery. Oh yeah I'll have a strong long black and a donut thanks... Had a call from Steven and Zak on Friday. Zak bought home a request for volunteers to man the schools sausage sizzle at the market. That would be the market where Harmony goes. I rang the school and am scheduled between 11-2pm. They have also asked if I would like to be part of the grade 3/4 reading group/book club. Think that's something I can handle....its something Zak says he would like...so I guess I'm finding another direction on this journey..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members shorty16 Posted July 25, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 25, 2011 Bonnie - That little girl was shown a bit of sunshine in your home. I just pray that the parents see what good shape she is in anhd continue that love. Good luck with your foot.Sally - Hang in there girl. Preparing for a funeral - just so hard, but with the support of your family and church, you will survive. Trudi - I used to read with 3rd and 4th graders when I worked part time. It was a joy. I loved every minute of it and you will too. Enjoy the brat thing - Wisconsin is known for its German meats, brats being one of them.Dee - the rain you got made Milwaukee news. 3 days later, but hey. Basements filled with water then caving in. Hope your house is still in good order?!?!Sus - Thinking of you and your brood that you and hubby care for. Even though taking care of children later in life does take alot out of us, the joy we see in their faces and the funny things they say make the most wonderful memories.My birthday weekend was awesome. I am so lucky to have Scott in my life. I am even luckier that we grew closer because of this grief journey we are on. Michelle looks like a chipmunk because of her wisdom teeth being pulled Friday. Love to all my fellow indigos on this grief journey. I am also praying for the families of Norway. Such a senseless tradegy. That losser will never convince me of the "necessity" of his actions. Harming God's children is a terrible sin. He will have to answer for what he did.Colleen, Brian's Mother Forever Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ericasmom Posted July 25, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 25, 2011 Wonderful Trudi, just wonderful. I can sure see you reading with kids indeed. I would ask you to come to my class each day to read with kids, the sausage? well, I am married to a sausage lover.I hope that you will be able to see Harmony, seems the stars are aligning for such a thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members hotrod Posted July 25, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 25, 2011 Good Evening IndigosJust wanted to stop by and say hello The summer doldrums are upon me. A bit down and missing my old life and Stephen's bright spirit. Sally You are in my prayers and thoughts Please be gentle with yourselfTrudi Love that you will be manning the sausage table (I bet it will be fun) I hope you do see Harmony Good luck with the school assignment. I too worked in the 2 and 3rd grade resource room when Stephen was in grade school. What fun it was!! We made volcanoes our of paper mac he and used baking soda and used vinegar to demonstrate an eruption , we put on plays and tied dyed tee shirts Great memories Bonnie Pinnacle day sounds like it will be a great success!!!Dee, Sus, Colleen, Betsy, Sherry all Indigos in my thoughts Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mysonrich Posted July 25, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 25, 2011 My heart and soul are heavy with the realization that a person that should have, could have been a major influence in my life and was not by choice, The person that I have always given the benefit of the doubt to , while trying to be true to my christian upbringing to honor, I find now my thoughts and feeling of disgust and some shame that I feel this way.My father. My god. Being a little girl of 3 years when they divorced I always loved my dad. I forgave him the fathers day he stood me up for dinner. He left without me. The day I turned 18 and he drove over to hand me a hospital bill from 3 = 4 years earlier when I broke my ankle. He said that since I was 18, I could pay it now. In my heart I have always tried to forgive and move forward. He is/was back in the hospital. From the hospital , COPD and back pain, ( back pain he has all his life which I now think was exaggerated, knowing the man has no concept of what pain is) No findings in tests. Nothing he tells me. Now in a rehab/nursing home and he tells me/them that he wants to die. And I think, you SOB, you had a son and daughter and not one but two grandson's that wanted to LIVE. We have Mike and Mike and Brain and Brian and Courtney and Erica and Shawn and Stephanie and Stephen and Jason and Joshua and Nick and Ashley and Jessica and Davey and Lisa and Jeff and Jaboa and Joey and Westley and the many,many people who have lost their children, that have graced this board with their grief,with their presence over the past 2.5 years , the people that wanted to live , that parents that prayed desperatelyyyy for a miracle, that prayed to turn back the hands of time...and YOU, want to lay in bed, watch TV, refuse rehab, and have me and your sil running across town bringggf you a Micky D's milk shake, toothpaste and a wendys frosty and just freakin lay there and expect others to be sub-servantant to you because ….because why??? why??? I should have listened to my mother. Now I know. And the disgust I feel is almost even to make me vomit. And there is more but today the realization hit me. Sorry folks. My head was ready to explode. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ericasmom Posted July 26, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 26, 2011 Sally, thoughts of you and prayers for you.Betty, I can understand fully those days when you just feel that hole. I hope that tomorrow or the next day is filled with something fun or lovely. Betsy, you have to let it out so that it does not consume you. I know when I say the word hate asscociated with my dad I have been lectured about the bonds of family. I remind folks that the bonds were broken when he chose to use me as he did rather than raise me with respect. You have disgust because of the attitude toward death and lack of love for life. It sounds as though he has always been difficult to deal with, perhaps very self-absorbed and selfish for one thing. To bring you the hospital bills when you became an adult? Yikes. I am sorry, I know it is difficult to find how you feel about adults in your life that you are supposed to love...those boundaries however do not matter to me. I think I would stop getting those shakes and keep my visits down to a minimum and if asked why, what you wrote here is perfect. THanks for thinking of all of our Angels and how dearly we wished them to make it in relation to your dad's issues. I am sorry if this makes you struggle with your Christianity.Well today was breezy and in the 80's, so perfectly lovely to sit outside and write in my journal. Then husband and I went to the BRown Elephant, (a resale shop that benefits AIDS patients) and unloaded 5 large containers of Christmas stuff that we will never use. That felt good getting that purged yesterday and then today. Then to school to drop off some boxes, then cleaned my car out in our driveway. Now that may not sound like a big job, but I am a slob and it has not been done in a long while. So that was good, my car is not an embarassment as it has been in the last several months. Then I went out for a bike ride. I rode about 9 miles in and around town but became very tired upon my return. I got home, made some eggs, (needed protein quick) and showered thinking I would do some curriculum work or reading, but all I could do was lay down and nap. I napped for nearly 2 hours. I felt so groggy when I arose, confused and wondered why i needed such deep sleep. Oh well, it felt good, must have needed it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members hotrod Posted July 26, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 26, 2011 Dear BetsyI hear you and do understand I am so glad you were able to come here, with friends and share that pain It is so powerful to own Now it is time to take care of you . Please know you are not alone Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guests Guest msnher Posted July 26, 2011 Guests Report Share Posted July 26, 2011 Betsy - I wish I were there so I could give you a huge bear hug or at least just sit and listen. And, bless your heart for thinking of our angels along with Rich while your dad wishes for death. Perhaps the reason it is hitting you so hard right now is because you're strong enough to face the truth of your father's character??? Denial is a wonderful survival tool. Maybe it's more than denial when it comes to our parents. Maybe it's hope. Hope that someday, somehow they'll cherish us the way they were supposed to. We hold out until there is just nothing left to hold on to. It would seem you are at that point. I believe it is God, Himself, who removes the scales from our eyes when He can trust us to face the truth. It's okay for you to be angry and disappointed in your father. And, it's okay for you to love him and hate him at the same time. For you it is another loss. Perhaps a loss that occurred many years ago but you are just coming to grips with now. And, as we all well know, grief demands our attention........your grief will be heard. Please listen to it concerning your father and if you are able, share it here where far too many of us understand far too well the heartbreak a parent can bring into our young lives.Much love,Susannah/Stephanie's mom Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members daveydow1 Posted July 26, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 26, 2011 Hello all INDIGOS.......I've been off BI for awhile. Some "error" glitch stuff, but now Iwas able to get back on.Sally-----Thinking of you as you face the sorrowful and painful funeral of your belovedhusband tomorrow. Prayers for you and your children. May Jeff rest in peace with sweet Joshua in God's Heaven.Dee----Cooling only slightly here.....still very humid. We have 12 acres of field corn on theback and side of us, which contributes so much humidity. My.....what a nice bike rideyou had. I, too, get groggy and confused if I nap in the daytime, so I try not to do it...also feel a little 'headachy' when waking. I just try to make it to nightime to sleep. Iagree about the tragedy in Oslo.....so terrible.....all those lives snuffed out in an instant.Bonnie----Prayers for the sweet little baby girl. I pray they take better care of her. I hopethat the foot surgery goes well, and you can recuperate before Pinnacle Days. The old-fashioned truck with cinnamon donuts and coffee is such a good idea, and I'm sure allthe people will love it.Trudi----I think you will love reading to the 3rd & 4th graders.Colleen---Hoping Michelle feels better soon, after having her wisdom teeth pulled. Nevera fun thing to have done, but often very necessary.Betty-----Today, we looked across the hayfield towards the woods, bordered by the cornfield,and there was a doe with her two little fawns, feeding from her.....one on each side of her.When they were finished, she began to graze on the clover, and the little ones jumped aroundand kicked up their heels. They were about 50 yrds or so away, so we got a good look. Then,they returned to the woods to get in the shade.Betsy----So sorry about the way your dad has acted. I agree that he must have been a self-absorbed and selfish person. Thank you, friend, for remembering all our kids, and sayingtheir names, along with your dear Rich's. That's what is good about this site.....where we can come to just vent when life hands us negative and sorrowful punches. The old saying "roll with thepunches"..............hm,....not always easy to do. Well, it's midnight, so off to bed I go. Sleep well everyone. Davey&Lisasmom, Sherry Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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