Loss of an Adult Child

[shorty16]

[glow=red]Danielle, Danielle, Danielle[/glow]

 

Wishing you a happy Birthday in Heaven.

Brian, go give Danielle a big hug (if you haven't already)

Colleen

[mysonrich]

Danielle,

[daniellemom]

Colleen and Betsy - Thank you so much! You are all such wonderful people, I don't know where I would be with out you all! Thaks again.

Sonya (Danielle's Mom)

[shorty16]

Terrie - What a funny story.  At least you found the underwear and not another person in church!?!?

Betsy - I can relate to the "Father" issue.  My father is simply a sperm donor for me.  He has nothing to do with my children and that is his loss.

I do not even remember what people wore to Brian's funeral?  I do know some of the girls made shirts with Brian's name on them.  I also know some of them were crying so hard, they could not even utter a single word.

My Boy Brian.  I miss you every second of every day.  I drove your car today Brian and the muffler still makes me laugh(until I have to renew the lisence plates).

Colleen, Brian's Mother forever and ever

 

[daveydow1]

 

   HAPPY HEAVENLY BIRTHDAY TO YOU...SWEET DANIELLE.

  Sonya and family--- Remembering you in my thoughts & prayers, and

  may your lovely memories of your beautiful daughter, Danielle, warm

  your hearts.

     Daveysmom,  Sherry

[lolynbo]

DANIELLE DANIELLE DANIELLE.....SWEET SWEET DANIELLE..FOREVER YOUNG FOREVER SMILING.....ALWAYS AN ANGEL....

[tanmanmymagicman]

danielle; you are beautiful......your mom so proud :posting lots of  pictures of her beautiful girl.........She wants everyone to know you...........Good job mom...!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I  hope you are having a sweet day.........Love Tanner's mom; Cindy

[mpsmom]

Danielle  .....

Happy Birthday Sweet One,

Hope you "partied down" yesterday and are resting peacefully today  --sweet angel.

Love , Marcia           Bethany's Mom Forever

[nicksdad]

The photographer finally sent the pics to us on a cd for the butterfly release. I think all together there are like 250 of them....I like the way she did some so they are black & white with just some color like this one.

[summergirl]

HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEET DANIELLE - I JUST KNOW THAT IT WAS PARTY CITY IF MY JESSICA HAD ANYTHING TO SAY ABOUT IT AND I AM SURE SHE DID!!  SHINE BRIGHT IN THE SKY AND SOAR HIGH WITH THOSE WINGS - SURROUND YOUR FAMILY WITH YOUR ENERGY!!!   DANIELLE, DANIELLE, DANIELLE !!!!

Greg - I still wear "thongs" on my feet!!!

Tavian is home and very happy - had a good time, BBQ and fun. We went for a 4 mile bike ride after school and he was a tired little boy - I kept up with him pretty good and it was great !! We plan on riding each night until the weather gets to bad. He is so sweet and our home always seems more complete when he is home.

Dee - thanks, yes I know that I must let the tears fall - just sometimes I try to hold them back for fear of never stopping!! Jess is always with me no matter where I am or what I am doing. We are going to do the nails this week - our night out as we always did.

Greg - thanks for the idea on the solvent printer - I am going to check around and see if I can find a place around here - that sounds like a great idea - do they do the inking for you, do you just tell them what you want and they do it??? Never heard of it before so need to ask - thanks.

Tired tonight but also energized by Tavian - tears of happiness tonight.

Love and peace to all and to those I did not respond to please forgive me, I will catch up soon.   Love to all - Kathy

[summergirl]

Dan - amazingly beautiful !!!

[arc4ever]

Happy Birthday Danielle, thinking of you and keeping you in my prayers.

Love Terrie (Adam's mom)

[briansdad]

[user=17871]summergirl[/user] wrote:

HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEET DANIELLE - I JUST KNOW THAT IT WAS PARTY CITY IF MY JESSICA HAD ANYTHING TO SAY ABOUT IT AND I AM SURE SHE DID!!  SHINE BRIGHT IN THE SKY AND SOAR HIGH WITH THOSE WINGS - SURROUND YOUR FAMILY WITH YOUR ENERGY!!!   DANIELLE, DANIELLE, DANIELLE !!!!

Greg - I still wear "thongs" on my feet!!!

Tavian is home and very happy - had a good time, BBQ and fun. We went for a 4 mile bike ride after school and he was a tired little boy - I kept up with him pretty good and it was great !! We plan on riding each night until the weather gets to bad. He is so sweet and our home always seems more complete when he is home.

Dee - thanks, yes I know that I must let the tears fall - just sometimes I try to hold them back for fear of never stopping!! Jess is always with me no matter where I am or what I am doing. We are going to do the nails this week - our night out as we always did.

Greg - thanks for the idea on the solvent printer - I am going to check around and see if I can find a place around here - that sounds like a great idea - do they do the inking for you, do you just tell them what you want and they do it??? Never heard of it before so need to ask - thanks.

Tired tonight but also energized by Tavian - tears of happiness tonight.

Love and peace to all and to those I did not respond to please forgive me, I will catch up soon.   Love to all - Kathy

Kathy they should be able create it for you or use something you've done

[mysonrich]

Dan, great photo. I will agree with Marcia here, and adding to the fact that throughout my life we/family have always had a visit or visits to the cemetery, it is comforting in a way to visit. Now Rich is with me here but I wonder if others would like to visit but have no place to go. Just a thought.

 

Rich attended Vo-Tech while in H.S. He settled with automotive technology. He was in two big competition's. One for his home state of NJ, he came in 2nd. The other was in Philadelphia, lots of entries. He was so nervous he made himself sick the night before. He did ok but didn't win, according to Rich, he second guessed to long on a timing issue...belt?. But the fact remains that he was good at what he did later. He started working on bicycles when he was in his early teens. I think dear old dad , ( trying to forget) well, his jab got to me and I go on to think, " but you didn't even know him". anyway, Rich played football too. I have a list in my head of people I would like to go see and thank them for their kindness to my son. We had a neighbor, he owned a couple McDonald's and he and his son invited Rich to join a team not connected to his high school, I guess he wasn't in high school yet. That was something that built his confidence. and Richs vo-tech teacher, I'm going to pay him a visit someday. Rich did go on to play HS football.

 

Greg, thanks. I'l l call around today.

 

early morning ramblings. Thinking of you all and sadden to hear  of the death of a Penn State student. I was hoping he was just hungover, asleep somewhere. He was 18 and fell 15 feet. My prayers are with his family and his sister, they attended college together.

 

 

 

[daniellemom]

Thank you all for the birthday wishes for Danielle. I miss her so much and I know you all know how I feel.

Dan the picture is great! Thanks for sharing.

Sonya (Danielle's Mom)

[heartbeataway]

Betsey,

Love the picture of Rich!  Sorry to hear about the Penn State student ..... no parent should ever walk this path!

Dan,

The pictures you do are just amazing! 

Bonnie

[heartbeataway]

[align=center]Happy Birthday to you

Happy, Happy Birthday to you

Happy Belated Birthday Angel Danielle

Happy Birthday to you!

Sonya,  forgive me for being late!

[/align]

[hotsauce]

Sonya and Tim,

sorry i missed Danielle's birthday, but like they say "better late then never".

 

Happy Birthday DANIELLA !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

you are such a beautiful angel.

mary ann

[mikesmomrs]

[align=left]Wow...don't come on the board for one day and miss an avalanche of posts!   First, I must say (belatedly, Sonya, but glad I saw it at least before it was too far buried in previous posts):  [/align]

[align=center]HAPPY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY DANIELLE[/align]

[align=left]Like others here, I know she spent the day in party city, with all of our angels there helping her to celebrate!  I am so glad that Mattie got to send off the balloon for her precious sister and that you all got to be together for this day of celebration for your sweet Danielle's life.  Being together is comforting, and each one can share that love they feel.  [/align]

[align=left]love and peace, carol  mikesmomrs[/align]

[mpsmom]

Dan, I am 'almost' back again, Thank you so very much for the picture for Bethanys angel date, the butterflies all around her.  It was absolutely beautiful, I called my husband over to see... it brought tears to his eyes, to know that so many who never got the opportunity to know our baby girl love her so much. THANK YOU, THANk YOU, THANK YOU !!!   Your artistic talent is ceratinly a gift to us all on BI.  Nick's gravesite ( I hate calling it that) is so pretty in the 'butterfly' pictures. I love the black and white with just the colored butterfly.  You remember we talked about releasing butterflys but it is still so very hot here, 108 on her angel day, this morning is nice only about 80 and will stay in the 90's today.  It just didn't seem the right thing to do to bring the live butterflies here to Las Vegas while it was so hot, we released balloons instead. 

HUgs, Marcia (& Larry)  Bethanys Parents Forever

 

little by little, today, I hope to get back online and Thank everyone who reached out to us.  

[zachysmom]

Do the flashbacks ever get easier. I see my baby laying on the floor not moving every time I close my eyes. I know its not happening again but it doesn't make it easier. I have yet to get even a semi decent nights sleep. Its hard to even try to go to sleep knowing what's waiting for me when I close my eyes. I will be honest if it wasn't for the fact my family needs me I wouldn't still be here. Some days remember that my job here isn't finished is harder than others and I think how easy it would be to just slip away

When I look at this picture on my bad days its like my angel is telling me to come find him.

[hotsauce]

Beth,

i don't think losing our children will ever get easier, maybe softer, but i am still fresh (May 1) is when my son Brian passed away to leukemia.  i know it is not the same for you, but to see our children died is just not fair. 

i hope you and your family are having a little better time, since the last time we talked.  i'm praying for you and all our angels.

mary ann

[heartbeataway]

Beth,

You're new to this journey and going down a tough path.  We have all ( folks correct me if I'm wrong) walked that line of wanting to be with our children but knowing it's not our time ....

It hit me hard at about 6 months after Jason left. I will never forget it. I finally verbalized my feelings to my husband. I told him that I "don't think I can do this anymore,  it's just too painful"  and I " don't want to do this anymore".

With tears streaming down his face, he took my hand and told me he understood. "BUT, what about me and what about the other people who love you?  Do you really want to do this to me?  Do you want to put me through this hell again?"

It was as Oprah says, a light bulb moment.  I've never said it again.  I've thought about it. I actually think that's normal in a way.  When the thought of the rest of my life without our son becomes overwhelmingly sad, I think how much I wish I didn't have too.

But, it's the hand we've been dealt and we can fold or we can play and hope for a win in the end.

Jason would never fold and so we keep playing .......

Sending you strength for the journey,

Jay's Mom, Bonnie

[arc4ever]

Beth,

I know the images are so hard, and the strength to stay here is VERY hard.  On Friday, it will have been 18 months since Adam passed.  The images are still very much in my mind.  For the first few months it was harder to get past those horrible images.  I could not think of anything else, and when I tried, nothing worked.  No matter what I tried to think of it reminded me of Adam.  The only thing that helped me was to picture a flower, just a flower. I would focus on that flower in my mind's eye until the horrible images seemed to lessen.  I have a little more control over where my mind wanders these days, but the images still come and often, but when they come I have to stop and force myself to think of something else.  I have moved passed the flowers and am at least able to expand where my mind goes - somewhere not so painful.  And I have even had some luck in thinking of the good times with Adam.  I don't know what will work for you, I do know those images will be in my mind for the rest of my days here on earth, but it has gotten a little better and not a constant thought.  It is very hard work, my heart is with you.

Terrie (Adam's mom)

[welovedrew]

Hi, Dee...Yes, I am still here (unfortunately...not that I don't like all of you!). You are too cute!

Kathy...I love the picture of your beautiful daughter on the beach. She looks like so athletic.

Sonya...Happy Birthday to your beautiful Danielle!

Val...Florida October 17 & 18. Please email me!

Hugs & Kisses to everyone! (Drewsmom) Mary

[daveydow1]

Beth---Such a beautiful little boy is your Zach. I'm sorry you are in

such a bad way. At this early stage for you, I know the pain is so terrible.

Peace & prayers, friend.

Betsy----Your son Rich is a handsome guy. The Vo-Tech school for him was

so good, since he was such a whiz at what he loved to do. My son, Dave,

also went to vocational school---for graphic arts. He loved it. 

Dan---Great pic, and loved the birthday greeting for Danielle with butterflies.

    Daveysmom,  Sherry  

[daveydow1]

Speaking of Butterflies----Just read an article on Monarchs, and wanted to

pass on a few facts.

1. Monarchs east of the Rockies migrate 2,000 mi. to central Mexico in fall.

2.They move only by day at a pace of 5 to 18 mph.

3.Each Monarch makes only one trip--when on their return migration north,

they lay their eggs on milkweed plants along the way, then die.

4.Several generations separate those that return in the spring from the ones

that headed south the previous fall.

5. Milkweed is highly toxic to most animals. Monarchs are quite distasteful to birds &

predators due to the toxin from the milkweed  plant that they feed on, which is

 harmless to Monarchs, but remains in their bodies,  and on their wings. Abdomens

 are tough & leathery--along with bad taste, wards off predators without killing the

 Monarch. 

Sherry

 

 

[mysonrich]

Sherry, Davey was a creative, artistic young man?  Something I have always admired, I am so lacking in that area but wish I had the talent.

 

I look at the football picture of Rich and see a reflection of my hands. Poor kid, also got my toes! thank you for saying so, both our boys are handsome.

 

 

Beth, I could never, ever,ever compare the lose of my friend to suicide by gun to the tragic accident that ended your sweet baby's earthly life. My friend shot himself after both his adult children died. What I can say, as Bonnie said I think, there were times I wanted to go to sleep and not wake up after Rich died. I didn't want to kill myself, I just wanted the pain to go away. I do know this, the devastation left behind by suicide is beyond words, explanation. More people love you then you probably know and as hard as this is, don't do it.

I also want you to know that I never talk of my friends suicide, I only say this now in a hope that you understand how much you mean to this world. Peace Beth

[ericasmom]

Betsy, what a lovely thing to say to Beth, and Beth, I agree with all the wise words here, including yours. Yes, it is the hardest thing to sit and wonder how the hell you are going to get through today much less weeks, months, years, and somehow, we do it for all the right reasons. The first of which is, for the life of our Baby who cannot stand here with us, we stand for them, we stand for all the others that love and need us, and even though we do not want to be needed while we feel like this, and we are unsure of what others love is for, we go on. We go on and we see after the weeks and months of work, that we can love again, you know, like really know that we are feeling  love for another. I doubted any love I thought I felt before Eri died. I knew that I loved my Son, but other than that, I could not definitively say that I loved anyone. I was too overwhelmed to make any room in my heart except for the hole and my Son. I promise that the days will move a bit faster one day, but not for a while. The images? Well I needed help with those and at 6 months, went to a therapist and stayed on a once-per-week basis for 2 years. between that and being here, I felt life unfold anew, achingly sharp in contrast to what once was, but nevertheless, life. Now, 6 years later, I feel whole, and the hole in my heart holds a wealth of love for many and there is a special place there that holds Erica in all of her splendor, in all of her silliness, and in all she was and is to me. There is room for all of Eri plus the rest of the world right here beating in my chest. You are at themost tender time, so new adn a layer of shock has worn away leaving you raw. Feeling as you did, like not being here would be better...well it is anormal feeling Beth, many of us have been right there and had to resist that urge to leave. Hang on Kiddo, we are all here holding you and leaving our footsteps in the mud along this dark path, step inot our footfalls until your legs have more strength. As Bonnie said a long time ago, same path, different time line.

Love to All,

I hope that everyone had a day of peaceful reflection yesterday on World Peace Day

Today the autumnal equinox, and for Trudi, the vernal equinox.

We are in the middle place, the time that is brief and but a moment of equality...night and day.

Betsy, the young man from the fall at college, his cousin works with my sister. Sadness.

[summergirl]

Greg - thank you so much, I think I found a place right here in town that will help me.

I am very upset tonight so I will make this short (I think) and to the point. Tavian and I were headed to the park up street as it was so nice (after school) and we decided to go visit Jessica, it has been a while since he has wanted to go with me but we had gotten 2 stone "froggies" (her favorite) and he wanted to give them to his mommy. When we got out of the car I noticed right away that something was not right - THE STONE HAD BEEN TWISTED ON THE BASE !! I was shocked and Tavian got upset and kept trying to push it back !! I got him calmed down and called Barry and told him and he said "it was probably one of the "maintenance" people on a riding mower" - I said "what size mower was it that could move a stone that heavy"!!!!!  I cannot believe that someone could move the stone like that and NOT NOTICE !! Barry is going up tomorrow and take pictures of it and make sure that it has not been cracked or broken (I could not stay to look as I just needed to get Tavian away). SO THERE WE GO, OUR WONDERFUL MAINTENANCE PEOPLE BEING PAID TONS OF MONEY TO TAKE CARE OF OUR LOVED ONES!!!!!!!!!!!!!   I am going to talk to someone tomorrow and then I am going to put an article in the local newspaper, I am so angry and so hurt - what is wrong with people ????  I feel like my heart has been ripped out!!!    Will let you know what happens. Love to all, Kathy

[lolynbo]

KATHY....I FOUND OUT THAT IF SOMETHING HAPPENS AT THE CEMETARY TO ANY OF KOURTNEYS THINGS IT IS COVERED BY OUR HOMEOWNERS...JUST A NOTE INCASE...

WE HAD SIGNS MADE THAT SAYS PRIVATE CARE SO NO ONE COMES NEAR KOURTNEYS...

WELL MY FRIENDS MOM JUST PASSED AWAY AT 828...I WAS WATCHING HER LIL 13 YR OLD GIRL WHEN IT HAPPENED AND WE WERE TRYING TO KEEP HER BIZZY AND HAVING ICECREAM...THEN HER HUBBY CAME HOME AND TOLD KRISTIN THAT GRANDMA WAS GONE...SO SAD...

PLZ PRAY FOR THEM

[ericasmom]

Prayers Lori, may she be joyously free.

Sherry, how nice to have the facts on monarchs. We have many people here in Illinois plant milkweed to attract the monarchs. If you go to Journeynorth.com, you can track the monarch migration. It is amazing. There are other animals that you can track as well.

Kath, tomorrow you will get some answers more than likely. Hang tight.

One of my writing buddies just wrote and said that her 22 year old cousin in California died suddenly last Sunday, She said that she does not know yet why he died, he just got tired all of a sudden and slipped away. His parents are here in Illinois, and so the Momma was there for some reason and was able to say goodbye, but a mystery right now. Prayers for Janice's cousin Chris.

[mikesmomrs]

I'm so sorry to hear of all the friends, etc., who are having to experience the loss of one of their loved ones...some young, some old, but yet the impact is the same...sorrow and loss.  I will keep all of the families in my prayers and thoughts. 

Kathy:  I am so very sorry about Jessica's stone...I can only imagine how you feel, and poor little Tavian...he must feel so hurt!  I so hope that things get straightened out tomorrow and that you find that perhaps it was a lawn mower incident and that they were in the process of letting you know...it would at least make it a little easier to swallow...I hope that everything gets straightened out soon. 

Marcia:  I think it was you who mentioned that you really don't like to call the sites that are for the children (or anyone who has passed)  "gravesites."  Neither do I.  We have decided to call where Mike's stone is a "Memorial Site."  It chills me to the core to hear "grave" in the same sentence as his name...

love and peace, carol  mikesmomrs

[mikesmum]

I have just come from the funeral of Jim, a man who despite knowing his diagnosis of malignant myeloma would cut short his life, took it by both hands and never "folded". There were tears as stories were told of his informed and courageous struggle with the disease.  It was a ceremony of celebration.  Of memories steeped in bicycling trips around Australia with his 2nd wife Bernie.  Of being Opa to Bernies grandbabies, of a passion for football and cricket tempered with a love and appreciation of good food and wine.  There in the front pew surrounded by grown grandchildren sat a frail and aged woman, head bent, hanky in hand.  It was Jim's mum.  Now in her late 70's her eyes told the story, she had outlived her son, her heart broken, he was her baby boy........

 

[mysonrich]

Rich was tired a lot the week before he died. He was never one to be tired unless he had to get up for school.  I have heard of others that pass in this manner. Sometimes I get upset with his g/f, as if she could have read the signs. But I can also go back 10 years and remember the moment he told be his chest hurt. Was that a sign or a football, skateboarding, bike riding ailment. I guess we all have these thoughts and memories. But, I am not a mind reader, human as I am.

 

 

And, I am going to attempt to turn this tide I ride lately. You all are fine examples that it can be done.

 

Dee, if you knew where I live you would understand that a low flying helicopter, circling, is not the norm.Unlike some cities I lived near.  I thought of the Penn State student when I saw the copter circling but probably unrelated. A miss step. One miss step.

[zachysmom]

Thank you all. I am so glad and sad to have you all to talk to. I wish we could of all met under different circumstances. Here is the only place I have to vent how I feel. It is also the only place I really have to talk about my angel. No one wants to talk about my baby. My husband isn't even able to mention his name. I have no family and my husbands family are all jerks. No one even says my babys name. I talk to my angel pretty much daily. It gives me an outlet sometimes. And the strength to put on my everything is ok mask. If any one really knew how I felt they would probably put me in a psych hospital. But since I wear my mask so well no one knows they are only worried about my husband they think he is in more pain than I am. How wrong they are. I go thru the day inside of myself watching myself go thru the motions of living. I guess you could probably say I have multiple mes' in one body. The one who puts on the mask daily, one who is crying nonstop that is never heard, one who helps everyone else while she is dying slowly, one who wants to rage and destroy everything and everyone, and one who tries to keep control of every me but sometimes fails.

I just keep going everyday it is my punishment for not protecting my baby

[mpsmom]

Zachysmom, I have not been posting lately, as we just passed our one year angelversary.... I read your posting ( below) and I could have written it....word for word....except I disagree with what you said in your last sentence " it is my punishment for not protecting my baby".............Please please please don't take yourself in to that frame of mind  !!!! You are not being punished, it was your Zach's time to leave this earth and be with God in heaven.  I know it is not comforting to us Moms and Dads here, but it is really all we have to hang on to  now... our children are safe and happy and healthy -- playing, partying and it will not seem like a blink to them when we see tham again...... hang on, the pain will get softer... it takes time, a lot of time and even then , we backslide down in to the dark pit.    I will keep you in my prayers, Marcia    Bethany's Mom Forever

[ericasmom]

Betsy, even where I live, populated urban area, I hear the difference between the helicopters, traffic or reporting on, and emergency life saving crew. When Erz was in the trauma center, the helicopter life saving unit came to visit us each day to ask how Eri was. She did not require the helio ride, as she was 2 blocks from the hospital...sweet people to do so hard a job. Betsy, good for you, get as healthy as you can,

Truci, blessings for them all and for you, loss takes its toll. We are made different by it, but remember, we are all here for reasons beyond our own understanding.

Love,

dee

[nicksdad]

Kathy..That is terrible about the stone but I have come to realize that the people working there (or at least at some) do not really care one bit. Bottom line is to them it is a business and ran as such. I am sure it will get taken care of one way or another.

[briansdad]

Hey guys, the car show is this weekend. Put all your collective prayers together for no rain. I figure with all our angels we should have some pull. I want to correct something. This show has been put on the last 5 yrs by Brians car club buddies.I just watch.They are a blessing to our family.

Greg

[heartbeataway]

Kathy,

Doesn't seem like any excuse or explanation will make up for Tavian's upset. I'm so sorry!

Greg,

You've got it.  I'm doing the "rain, rain, go away" dance just for you guys!

[arc4ever]

Trudi,

your posting about attending Jim's funeral made me so sad, this poor woman, who I'm sure most people did not notice the body language, and the sadness in her eyes that you were able to instantly "read".  It does not matter how old we are, how old are children were - we are not meant to outlive our children.

Just saw the news on the dust storms in Australia - are you affected?

Terrie (Adam's mom)

[mikesmomrs]

Zachysmom:  I agree with Marcia, and I am sure everyone here agrees....God is not punishing you...we are left behind for what reason, we don't know, but as Marcia said, it will be a blink to them when they see us again...we must live our life in honor of them...we must try hard, very hard, and as difficult as it may be sometimes...and we all here know the levels that that difficulty can reach...we must always try to do what we know our child would have wanted...to live, to be happy, to remember them, but to NOT stop living because they are not here.  I have these words, straight from the lips and heart of my son, as he fought brain cancer, knowing that he was not going to win that fight...he won many, many battles, but the war was won before he ever knew he had to go into battle...he said to me "Mom, please don't die because I do."  Zachy is saying that to you, also, please know that.    We here all know about the "masks," the times when we must forge ahead for others...but our main energy comes from the forging ahead for our child gone before us.   We can do this...even though there are some days when we wonder how we will take the next breath, let alone survive through this pain. 

Know that we are all with you, holding you close, thinking of you, caring that you breathe, caring that you are in pain, caring, just caring. 

love and peace,  carol  mikesmomrs 

[cameronsmom1]

Well, I went to the doctor today and I am measuring 2 weeks ahead (30 weeks) so I don't know if that means my due date is sooner or if it's just a big baby which wouldn't surprise me since Cameron and Brayden were both over 9 lbs. I will have to send current pics of how big I am getting when I get the chance. I get my 4d ultrasound friday and will post pics of that too. They drew blood to check my thyroid again for some reason so I will know the results from that in a couple of days. Since they plan on inducing me at 38 weeks I only have about 9-10 weeks left. Can you believe it? It's gone by so fast. I actually got on and registered at walmart and my sister plans on having me a baby shower where they just bring gift cards and diapers so I am getting more and more excited. Keep me and Ashton in your prayers and I will keep you all updated.

Marcia, not too much longer so be ready for the text when I go into labor.

Amanda

[mikesmum]

[user=10710]briansdad[/user] wrote:

Hey guys, the car show is this weekend. Put all your collective prayers together for no rain. I figure with all our angels we should have some pull. I want to correct something. This show has been put on the last 5 yrs by Brians car club buddies.I just watch.They are a blessing to our family.

Greg

Greg - really a tribute to the bonds of friendship forged by Brian now lived out in honour of your son........

Terrie - No we missed out (thankfully).  There is a friendly rivalry between Sydney and Melbourne so seeing the 'coathanger' bridge through the orange haze bought a smile!  Its the dust from the 'red centre' that blew across Northern Territory to Sydney then onto Queensland further north.  The centre is desert, dry and arid..

Zachymom - The if only's do nothing but cause more pain.  Each one of us here would love to have been all knowing, all seeing to prevent losing our child.  But being punished because we didn't know what was coming....no way.  We are rewarded for having had our children in our lives no matter how long or short their stay.  I'm rewarded each time I see Mikes smile, his eyes looking at me......my heart breaks but I am blessed.

Walking walking walking, my way back from a sad place today.....Trudi

[zachysmom]

I have a favor to ask would someone go to my sons' memorial site the link is in my profile and let me know if a song plays. The only internet access I have is on my blackberry and it won't play.

Thanks

Beth

[arc4ever]

Beth, I just checked. There is no music playing.

 

Terrie (Adam's mom)

[mpsmom]

Beth, there is no music.

Marcia    Bethanys Mom Forever

[zachysmom]

Ok thanks. I was trying to upload a song but it isn't working since I just have my blackberry

[daveydow1]

Trudi----So sorry about Jim's passing, and yes, that mother carries the

burden of sorrow that any parent carries when their child dies---no matter

what the age  at the time of  passing was. 

Beth----I guess we all go through the feelings of being at "fault" for our

child's death. Parents feel they are  to protect their child, and can feel

guilt when the child passes away. You are not at fault....that is for sure.

Please keep coming to BI. It is a place to vent any & all feelings no matter

at what timeline one is on in this journey.Be kind to yourself.  Peace & prayers,friend.

Betsy---Thank you for your kind words about my son. Yes, he was a creative

person. Loved computer/internet technology, & trained for it---never got a

chance to get a job in that field, though. Your Rich has a beautiful smile--it just

shines out.

Kathy----So sorry to hear of Jessica's stone being moved around on the base.

I would bet that the mowing crew hit it while mowing. Those machines they use

now are monsters---not just small average mowers. I hope that you get to the

bottom of this. Poor Tav....I hope that this can be resolved soon.

Carol---You are right....."grave" in the same sentence with our child's name is

like a stab to the heart. Memorial sounds better.

Dee---Thanks for the website for the Monarch migration. I will check it out for sure.

Your advice to Beth was so true.  I know what you mean about hearing/seeing

one of those jet helicopters (MediVacs). Davey said to me one day...."I've never

flown, Mom"....which was true... only for us to see a graphic picture in the paper

of the crash scene, and the helicopter in the air....taking our son to the trauma

center....where he died within the hour. Every time I see one of those fast-moving

helicoptors, I get the chills. I'm sure you know what I mean. Peace, friend.

       Daveysmom,  Sherry