Loss of an Adult Child

[mamabets]

For heartbeataway~ The card might be the cutest thing ever...How PRECIOUS!!! I feel your love, and their little paws wrapped around me right now!!

LOVE

mamabets

[4everjoeysmom]

Oh Bonnie, I agree! The card/photo with the dogs... it's awesome! I was just thinking, Michael has 4 Akitas (outside) and I have my Shih-tzu and my Mini Schnauzer AND currently their lotter of five. Wouldn't it be quite and adventure to try and get a photo with all 11. I remember taking my 2 kids for portrait sittings and sometimes how challenging that was. Imagine 11 furry ones! If that doesn't bring a heart-giggle.. LOL!

[mamabets]

For ericasmom~ I am brought to my knees when I see my babies...

Then, as time goes along, I just giggle with so many tears in my eyes...We tell Julia these are happy tears!! She knows both sets, all too well...

My niece has her 2 little girls...My nephew has his little Audrey...Another niece due with her first next summer...

LOTS of babies, and I am just so far away from them all. But, I do a good job with the phone and the computer...Free minutes could not have come along at a better time in my life....

Sending love, and hoping for a peacful update on Jon and Michael...xoxoox 

LOVE

mamabets

[mamabets]

For mikesmum~ A frieght train with tinsel..

That is a chock full of wisdom as it can be...That is so similar to statements when I say to myself "Where did THAT come from????"

Brilliant as our angel stars....xoxoxo

LOVE

mamabets

[johnnysmama]

Hi dear all

Dee

I do continue to pray for Michael, jonathon and you. I am so sorry all the pain you all are experiencing. I love your walk stories.

 

Betsy

Your babies have to make your heart sing.

 

Bonnie

I keep thinking did you medicate your dogs to get them to sit that great for the pic? Just kidding. I was very impressed and the big dog(I think Jay's) is great. He is thinking-enough humiliation already. I just loved it.

 

Marcia

Hurray! A news story worth the print and love that your daughter's memory is kept alive.

 

Amanda

Love your angels marker. The words are so special.

 

Trudi

It is a freight train. We will make the ride together.

 

Sonya

The trip is the day after Christmas. I am now panicing leaving the girls. I have not left them since Johnny and now I am rethinking this trip without them. Do you think leaving them is OK? They are 16 and 18 years old. Their grandma is staying the nights with them and some days (which Stephanie is NOT happy about) but am starting to feel funny about going.

 

Lorri

Love the card-so true, so true...

 

Hang in there. Countdown till its over is 5 days.

 

Hugs, Kay

[mamabets]

For johnnysmama~ We are safe together here...One breath at a time..

The mind has a way of shutting down a bit, before long, once this journey begins... Many painful, hurtful things within the whole walk can be placed elsewhere, and this "mind exercise" can help, once we just listen to our hearts, and know that with each beat, a kiss and a hug is given to us by our sweet angels...

My Jackie, her hubby Josh and the babies will be here for a few days after Christams...We will be smiling so much, that we will laugh until we cry!!!!! xoxoxo

LOVE

mamabets

[cameronsmom1]

Dee,

A friend of mine lost a baby two days after it was born. This happened last December. Then I lost mine and two weeks later another friend of mine lost hers because her water broke too early. It was very sad but we had each other and now our babies have each other also. I hope to someday try again but am not sure my husband would be willing. This was his first and it was very hard on him. He is so scared of it happening again. Hope everyone is doing well. 

Amanda

[daveydow1]

Amanda,

Yes, you are right-------we will be with our babies no matter where we

are buried---when the time comes. Angel spirits are not confined to any

one place. They can be anywhere they want to be. Angel Brayden's

headstone is very nice......I love the footprints. Our little Lisa's stone

says  "God Bless our Baby",  and has a little lamb carved into it.  The

stone is small.  Peace to you, friend.

                                                                 Sherry                                                  

[daveydow1]

Betsy,

  That is a lovely picture of Julia and baby Caroline.  They look so

 sweet with their Christmas dresses on.  You're right-----it's still

 baby steps most of the time on this road. It's a hard time of the

year for everyone, but we will all stick together here at BI, and

will somehow make it through.

                      Sherry

[summergirl]

Hello to all - been a busy weekend. Went shopping with Barry and Tavian yesterday and we actually had a great day!!  We shopped, went out for lunch and then we played word games on the way home and we laughed!! In fact I laughed as I haven't in a long time - Tavian was so funny and so happy it was infectious!! Today has been a day at home, cold, rainy and windy so I did alot of cleaning out Tavian's room as Santa will be coming and we need to get rid of the "old" and in with the "new" - he does not like to part with anything so we did it together and he did pretty good. Packed up his little boy books as I will always keep them. All in all it has been a good weekend. I am took off work this coming week to be with Tavian - he is so very excited that he and I are on "vactation" and we have plans. Tomorrow we go do a little shopping, Tuesday we are going to the Christmas party at my work place as all want me to bring him, Wednesday is Christmas Eve and then Christmas day, on Friday he has a friend coming to play for a few hours and then the weekend again. It is coming like a "freight Train" as Trudi say and I will be glad when it is over.

Lorri - Jessica's my space is Jessica Bennett - East Hampton, NY. I would love to have you go there - I have not been there in a few months as sometimes it is just too much for me - I need a break from all of it. Might sound selfish but that is how I do things.   The poem you wrote was so beautiful - what a wonderful thing your friend did.  I too have received my share of "family photo" cards this year and it makes me happy for those who have the family all together and yet the saddness in my heart overwhelms me.  I send out Christmas cards with Tavian only on them - it is so cute and so much easier on us.    The headstone sounds beautiful!!

Sherry - yes I am sure that my Jessica is smiling down and watching all of the activity and Tavian's exctement - surely she will get me through this.

I absolutely love the "doggie pic" - I cannot believe they look so perfect and are just sitting there with their hats on!!  Perfect and certainly made me smile.

Dee - what a wonderful walk you took us on - through the forest - thank you.

I am trying to find a good photo place to do my pictures on so I can get them from my scanner - have alot of pics I want to post. I have been looking into picnik.com - has anyone tried it??

Peace to all of you my extended family - Kathy

[summergirl]

If this works this is a pic of Tavian - he thought it was quite funny to sit inside of my sister's wash machine when we visited!!!

[daniellemom]

Hi all!

Love all the pictures! 

Amanda, the head stone is very precious.

Dee - as always my prayers are with you, Jon and Michael. 

Kay - Stephanie is a very wise young lady (she not happy with her grandma staying) too funny!!  They will be fine and you and your husband will have a nice vacation. 

This weekend has been very busy!  Saturday my niece got married 2 hours away so that was an all day thing.  Very nice wedding.  Sunday was church then tonight was the Christmas play which I directed.  It went very nice, this was my first year heading it up because my sister was too busy with the wedding.  The children did so well in the play.  Of course I cried like a baby during the play remembering Danielle in all the plays from years past. 

I'm so on board with the frieght train coming with tensil.  I have not even started shopping and I'm running out of time.  I work tomorrow then Christmas carroling tomorrow night, but Tuesday all day I will be shopping so my precious James and Mattie will have somthing under the tree.

And so I must brag just a little.  James is a freshman at NC State University, he made the dean's list and has a 3.9 GPA!  I'm so very proud of him.  And just to let you know I know he doesn't get it from me LOL. 

Sonya

 

[ericasmom]

Oh Sonya, you should brag and be proud, and I would say that your young one gets so much from you, so very much. I know that youwill shop on Tuesday and find what gifts you feel will make them smile. It is the first day of winter now, so happy winter solstice all. Cograts on the play as well, that is no small feat. I cry at the sound of Childrens' voices in song, so I am right there with you. I carry a box of tissue to each assembly where kids will be performing.

Kay, I think it is fairly 'normal' (there's that word again) to feel apprehensive about going away, it is hard to not be near your kids these days. I also feel that the trip will be wonderful, filled with new kinds of wonder and leaving allows you to come home again. May it be beautiful and the girls will adjust to Grandma.

Kathy, that Child couldn't be cuter if he tried. I am so happy for your happy day, the three of you engaged and joyful. Laughter is truly the medicine from heaven. It sounds like a wonderful plan you have this week with Tavian. I am humming, "these are the days" by 10,000 maniacs.

Tonight our young neighbors stopped over to share a gift. They are a young couple from Detroit and moved next door in August. Very sweet with a little 18 month old, Emett. We had a little gift for Em and we played and had some snacks. Emett, as all toddlers do, grabbed each thing inhis reach, one of which was a framed photo of ERi. He held it in one hand while he waved to her with the other. Then he layed it down and babbled to her, touching her face so gently. He is the third child to do this, all of them about that age when they did. I said, "hey Emett, that is Erica,she likes you." He smiled and touched her some more. My heart was glad, she reaches out and is felt by those who have no barriers to spirits. He was talking to Eri.

Peace to All and to All a good dream.

 

[lolynbo]

I DONT HAVE ANYTHING THAT CUTE IN MY WASHER...

 

TOOK MY GRANDDAWGTER TO CHURCH THIS MORN...SHE POOPED IN THE FLOOR...IT S WAS OK, WE ALL LAUGHED...ITS A COWBOY CHURCH THATS HOW WE ROLL...LOL

ALSO DROVE TO OK CITY TODAY FOR KIMBERLYS 25TH. BIRTHDAY...WE HAD A GOOD TIME, AND DINNER WAS NICE, EXPENSIVE BUT NICE....HER FRIEND GAVE HER A GIFT...IT HAD THE SAME POEM I WROTE ON HERE YEST, IN IT W A CHRISTMAS ORNAMENT IN MEMORY OF KOURTNEY...IT WAS A SIGN I BELEIVE THAT KOURTNEY WAS WITH US AT THE PARTY...I ENJOYED MYSELF SO SHE MUST HAVE BEEN..

VERY TIRED, I DROVE AND HUBBY AND SON DOGGED MY SLOW DRIVIN...I DO SPEED LIMIT...UNLIKE SOMEONE I KNOW..(MONTY)

HAVE A BLESSED EVENING

MY GRANDDAWGTER PRINCESS..(KOURTNEYS BABY)

PRINCESS HIDDIN.bmp

[ericasmom]

Laughed out loud Lorri at your response to Tavian in the washer, you are a hoot. Gald that your family gathered for your Girl's birthday. Very happy that you felt Kourtney there with you.

Everywhere we go we take them with us. She must have laughed herself silly with the poop at church.

[cameronsmom1]

Well I didn't get to get any of my quilts done this weekend. I took my pictures that needed to be transfered to a place called label stable here in ardmore. They did the transfering for me last time and they did great. My husband picked them up since I didn't get off until 5 and they close at 5. When I got home to start them, only 5 out of 27 looked good. The rest were all faded and didn't get fully transferred on. I paid 60 dollars for that and I was mad. And of course they aren't open on weekends so I had to just send them an email asking them to fix this first thing monday. So hopefully they will call and get this taken care of so I can start my quilts and have them ready by thursday. So wish me luck!!

Amanda

[lostwoher]

Awww Amanda, so sorry to hear of your woes. How frustrating that must be. Best of luck getting them to correct it.

Lynn

[cameronsmom1]

Well I called them and they are saying that they are not responsbile for how they turn out. How are they not responsible? I took them to them so that they could do it right instead of me trying to do it myself. It just doesn't make sense. Now I have to spend another 60 to get them put on transfer paper and another 60 to have them ironed on. I'm so mad right now.

[mpsmom]

Amanda, I am so sorry..........I agree how can they not be reponsible? I am sure you have asked to talk to the owner of the business, this is crazy, of course they are responsible!!!!!!!!!!!!    My prayers are with you that they will fix this right away, I am sorry you are having to 'fight' to get it down properly....

Warm hugs, Marcia   (Bethany's mom )   

[cameronsmom1]

They are claiming that the transfer paper i brought in was defective and that if I would have used them to print the pictures on the transfer paper then they would have refunded me because it would have been their fault.  But I just dropped it off somewhere else so hopefully it will work out.

[mpsmom]

I hope so , sweetie, none of us need these kind of aggrevation , especially this time of the year.

[lostwoher]

hahaha, I was just thinking about your situation Amanda so I logged in to suggest that you take them elsewhere to be done but you already beat me to it. Hope it all works out   Deep breaths, in thru the nose and out thru the mouth.

[cameronsmom1]

LOL yeah I just picked them up from the other place and they look a lot better and they only charged me $15! So i'm happy but even more mad at the first place for charging me 60 to mess them up. But I get to start on the quilts tonight!!

[mpsmom]

Well the important thing is you get to strt on the quilts now... :D:D

[mikesmum]

Sonya - Oh yeah! Deans List.  You most definitely should be proud!  It warms the heart to have you share such an accomplishment with us here.

Amanda - So glad the transfers worked out - cheaper! Go figure.  I love the headstone for Brayden. The footprints.....hmmmm

Kay - I am a great believer in the benefits of generational sharing.  Your girls will discover a whole other world through the eyes of their grandmother.  You hopefully will re discover many things you might have lost sight of....Enjoy, its okay.

Kathy - That boy, such a smile, such a twinkle in his eye.......(Jess ?)

Dee - It really is amazing how these young souls find pictures and things belonging to our children and bond........Jeya (Steve's youngest) makes straight for Mikes guitar. 

To all braving the last minute shopping, good luck. We have Mal's sons birthday tonight and 17 for dinner tomorrow.  We both have food poisioning! Taking it in turns for the bathroom......such bonding.....

Take Care All -

This pic is Em & Caleb from their family Christmas Cards.......Love em!!!

[mikesmum]

The pic following (I hope) is of her with her thumb up after 'jammin'.  A sign Mike would give after the grandbabies had their turn at making music.......Gotta wonder.

[lolynbo]

HOW CUTE IS THAT...I SEE THAT THUMB....

I WAS WONDERING....WHAT DO OUR BABIES DO ALL DAY IN HEAVEN...DOES ANYONE  KNOW....I THINK THEY GET MORE EDUCATION...KINDA LIKE ANGEL CLASSES...WHAT YALL THINK?

[ericasmom]

Lorri,

Maybe our kids have different jobs and assignments, maybe they get to do what they love best, in that case, Eri is snow-boarding and playing at the beach all in one scene. She is listening to loud music and attending an outdoor 3-day concert, she is swinging babies around and holding them close, and she is watching movies and getting a back rub. She is laughing her butt off with her nostrils flaring, and she is shopping, and she is receiving gifts and she is buying some as well. Oh but she is having fun. Education? Each moment I expect, more education.

Trudi, what beautiful grandchildren, those cheeks on Em and Brother, and Mike's Girl, ready to rock. God bless you all and my hope is that in the New Year, you will be able to spend time with the Littlest Rocker. God-speed on the recovery from food poisoning. Icky.

Love,

Dee

[summergirl]

Hello to all - had a great day today with Tavian - went to return a toy he bought with "his money" that broke as soon as we began to play with it!!  So we went back and got fishing stuff!!

Sonya - Brag Big and Brag Loud - James with a 3.9 GPA!!!   Terrific and I am sure he got some of those brains from you!!

Lorri - thank you - he does look cute in the washer huh??  Sorry you just have plain old dirty wash but believe I have alot of that too with a 6 and 1/2 year old around - I swear he goes through more clothes - the other night he changed his pajama's 3 times because - well just because!!   Love Kourtney's little baby - so sweet.

Amanda - don't you just love it when they tell you "we are not responsible"!!!  Been there and done that and usually end up talking to the "person in charge" who is worse than the salesperson!!  I am so glad you got them all taken care of but sad you had to pay 60 for crappy work!! I have been known to tell them it's ok I won't be back and I promise to tell all of my friends not to do business with you!!!

Trudi - yes that is definitly the Jessica twinkle in his eyes!!  He is so much like her!!  Last night he was on the computer playing a game and I was in my room doing some things and suddenly he came in and hugged me tight and said "you are the best mi-mi in the whole world, not just because you are letting me use the computer, but just because you are"!!!   I am truely blessed!!

Dee - yes laughter is truely medicine from Heaven and I believe that Jessica was smiling down at us as a family - enjoying the day together and just being silly.

I agree with Dee - maybe our children have different jobs, assignments. If they get to do what they love best then my Jessica is throwing the ball for our Kalie girl, sunning herself on the beach, definitely listening to her favorite music and having a party with all of our Angels and I am sure she is in charge!! She always had the power to bring people together.  She most certainly has a hundred pairs of shoes and hats and lets not forget pocket books because we know we needed different ones for all occasions. Mostly she is sitting on a bench watching Tavian grow, laugh and live!!!    It is nice to believe!!!

Must go as dinner won't get done if I don't get to the kitchen so have a wonderful night where ever we all are. Peace and Love - Kathy

[bbarbie55]

I guess they are right the second year is harder! I'm getting hit harder this christmas than last. Its hard to know my Bobbi is really gone but I know its true. I'm trying to be cheerful but when I'm alone all the memories come flooding back. Christmas is in three days and I am going to have my daughter and my grandson at my house. I just wish I had her back too. I see all the other families with their kids and I hope they cherish their children with all there hearts.

I'm just ramblin because I'm a little depressed and missing my girl.

Deb

[mikesmum]

Dee - the baby girl, well she is Stevens.  Mike's little one still isn't allowed to visit with his family, in fact apart from us sending gifts we have no contact.....but we write in her journal, record special days.......it will be our gift when we finally come together again.

As for what our babies do all day..well for Mike it would be walking through the beauty he now finds himself in.    He is enjoying being able to be a chef again, something he had to let go of here. His earthly body held him captive for the last years.

And of course he has joined one heck of a band!!!  Jamming, writing and making beautiful music..........LOUD Music!!!

Best get back to changing linen, rinsing out buckets and trying to settle Mal...funny how men being sick is amplified 10 fold......(sorry Greg, maybe not all men)!

Trudi

[mikesmomrs]

Hi all:  Just checking in to let you all know I am thinking of you and following along in our travels to the station to meet the freight train with tinsel on it...we've had a lot of snow over the past few days and basically were snowed in today...my oldest grandson came and shoveled us out...but couldn't go anywhere anyway.  Our tree is up, but nothing on it but lights...but I did do Mike's little tree that I had planned, though my printer is not cooperating for the pictures I planned to put on it, so we will clip notes to the branches instead. 

Mike's two best friends are coming to dinner tomorrow, and we will reminisce and enjoy our memories...tears will fall I'm sure, but smiles will be there as well. 

So many things I want to mention, but my meory fails me...Sonya, way to go for James!  I know you are so proud!   Amanda...Braydon's stone, so poignant, so heartbreaking, so lovely....the footprints...

Lorri, I am so glad you got the quilt stuff to start your quilts...I still have the pictures for one I started for Mike the first Christmas he was gone, but I couldn't go any further with it...my heart just made my fingers freeze...someday...

Bets:  Loved the pic of the girls...time is just like that freight train with the tinsel on it...speeding on by as those girls just blossom! 

Bonnie...loved the pic of the dogs, also.  so cute, with Jay's dog standing tall in the middle, in charge...

I loved your walk in the woods, Dee, I could smell the cold and the pine through your words...

Trudi...loved the pictures, thank you so much for sharing...thumbs up, such a cutie! 

Kathy:  Tavian is such a gift...but then you already know that!

To all, thinking of you, praying you all have a safe holiday season...thank you so much for the gift of your friendship. 

As for the shingles, I am coping okay...some bad hours, but for the most part, better than I anticipated.   Thank you all so much for the advice...it is much appreciated.

love and peace,   carol   mikesmomrs

[heartbeataway]

I was thinking about heaven and holidays today.

I wonder if the celebration is more profound since the Birthday Boy is close by.

I wonder if they decorate with lights, glitter and garland. Do they have trees adorned with ornaments and bows or, is that a tradition of earthly dimension only.

Does someone bake a cake and add candles? Do heavenly choirs sing?

Are there presents and parties and baked goods? Do families gather together for dinner, gift exchanges, christmas carols and hugs?

Do they make new traditions and share old memories? Do they look down and remember us?

What is Christmas like in heaven?

Kathy,

I love the Tavian pictures. And I agree with others that he looks so much like his Mom. Beautiful boy!

Trudi,

Your picture is also sweet. I bet you are crazy about them!

Betsy,

Beautiful babies you have in your life!

Amanda,

The marker is really nice. Perfectly nice!

The quilts will be perfect - after all you've been through, you deserve perfect! Looking forward to the pictures!

Sonya,

Congrats to James on the 3.9! Woo hoo!!

Deb,

I agree. I think this year is harder for us too. Maybe last year we were still numb. Saturday evening we went to friends for dinner. It was the first time I've been out at night. I cried all the way there. It was something about the Christmas lights that set me off. I'm missing our boy so much.

This would be the time that I would be putting the finishing touches on decorations, meal preparation and gifts Preparing the bedroom that he would stay in. I actually would put little gifts on the pillow each night ......

I'm just really, really missing our boy ......

We're suppose to fly to Detroit tomorrow. We're expecting an icy morning here in Texas and we're flying into a winter storm watch there. I know this is awful but we really don't want to go now. We just want to hunker down and spend time with our pups, a fire, glass of wine and a good book or movie.........

So, as awful as it sounds, when you say your prayers tonight, remember that Rich and Bonnie are hoping for a cancelled flight tomorrow!! :-))

[daveydow1]

Sonya,

I too am getting a bit nervous and uptight about Christmas. I have

done all the shopping I am going to do. As for all the rest----who

really cares ?  (that's my state of mind right now). Am thinking of

begging off for some of the festivities at places we've been invited.

My husband dislikes all the family get-togethers (including his own

family's).  It will all come & go whether we participate or not, I guess.

Take care.                         Sherry

[daveydow1]

Kathy,

 Sweet little pic of Tavian in the washer-----he sure keeps your

life "livened up", doesn't he ?

                                             Sherry

[lolynbo]

YA  I LOOKED AGAIN IN THE WASHER...STILL NUTTIN,ITS A FRONT LOADER...BUT I DONT HAVE NO CUTE LIL BOY STICKIN OUT.. WITH CURLS YET.

I TOO AM DONE WITH MY SHOPPING, AND IM NOT WRAPPING A SINGLE GIFT...ITS ALL GONNA BE STOCKING STUFFERS OR STOCKING STICKINOUTTERS..I AM TOO THE POINT...BE HAPPY YOU GOT SOMETHING, AND TRY TO THINK OF KOURTNEY AND NOT YOURSELF...(NOT THAT ANYONE AT MY HOUSE IS BEING UGLY BUT THATS JUST HOW I FEEL)

WE ARE HAVING MY SMALL FAMILY HERE WED EVENING..AND WE WILL LIKE I SAID PASS KOURTNEYS STOCKING AND FILL IT FULL OF MEMORIES, AND THEN I GUESS GO TO BED..AND JUST MONTY KIMBERLY AND KODY AND MYSELF WILL BE HERE CHRISTMAS DAY...AND I KNOW THATS WHEN I WILL LOSE IT...IT SEEMS CHRISTMAS IS ALWAYS SO DEPRESSING ANYWAY (I DONT NO WHY, I JUST ALWAYS GET KINDA DOWN) AND THIS YR WILL BE BAD BECAUSE KOURTNEY ISNT HERE...NOW IM REALLY DREADING NEXT YR BECAUSE I HEAR ITS EVEN WORSE....(OH DEAR GOD)

I DONT NO IF I TOLD YOU BUT LAST NIGHT WE FINALLY GOT TO MEET KIMBERLYS NEW GUY (THE ONE THATS IN A BAND AND ON THE RISE...VERY FAST, JUST DID EUROPEAN TOUR) HE IS VERY NICE AND I GOT REALLY GOOD VIBES FROM HIM...I DONT NO IF HE IS MY NEXT SON IN LAW,  BUT HE SURE WAS NICE..

WELL THE BUZZ AROUND MY HOUSE IS HUBBY MADE ME SOMETHING WITH HIS OWN HANDS FOR CHRISTMAS AND IT IS AWESOME...AS SOON AS I FIND A SUCKER TO TELL ME WHAT IT IS I WILL LET YALL KNOW....CURIOUSITY KILLED THE CAT...LOL

OK NIGHT FOR NOW..

LETS PRAY OUR TINSEL TRAIN DONT DERAIL AND WE HAVE A SMOOTHE TRIP

 

[ericasmom]

Deb, that is not rambling in my opinion, and never apologize if that is what you are doing, as this place is for we who must ramble on. We ramble on to discvover where we have been, to see our footsteps, to view the distance we have come, and when the second year happens and we feel no further, let me assure you that you are. You are further and that is the pain and as Bonnie has said, the numb is gone and the daily is in place, and that is what hurts so very much. I will say with a Scouts-honor symbol, though I was never a scout but have always loved the saying, that after a while, maybe before the second year is over, a different sense of things will evolve and you will feel yourself climbing. It is as though for many of us, climbing up a hill and finally being able to see the surroundings, the life around us. Prior to this all we can see is our aching hearts, we see our tragedy and we replay all of its affects. Finally, the hill gives way to the present day filled with possibilities again. Different than before we lost our Babies, but hopeful again, and some energy will return to your life. I pray for this for each of you who are experiencing this low. I remember it well and can honestly say that I have never been back to that very low place again. I of course get sad, I miss my girl each day, but I feel her in each day too, and now that is one of my joys. She is with me and I have faith that she is more than fine. The energy she touches me with is effervecent. (sp) Now while Christmas is a hard one still for me, I always look forward to a new year. Maybe start a New Year tradition in the honor of your Girl. I am glad that your family will be with you on Christmas, and I hope that you feel the love of your Daughter there.

Trudi, sorry, I didn't read well apparently, mistaking the baby for Mike's Daughter. Do you get photos of her? I sure wish that it was different for you in that department, my prayers to that.

My prayers will include a wish for Bonnie and Husband to stay home and out of our midwestern storms tomorrow, prayers then, for a cancelled flight. Christmas in Heaven? Nothing but the best.

Kathy, Jess is indeed watching her Momma and her Son grow together and she is so very proud of you both. (proud that Step-Dad is also finding his way).

[heartbeataway]

Dee has an idea .......

Start a new, New Years Tradition, in honor of our children.......

any thoughts?

I thought about my request for prayers for a cancelled flight. That is so unfair! It's a full flight .......

The tinsel train is barreling down hard ...... !!

[mpsmom]

Bonnie, how about we pray that you and your husband get 'bumped' on the flight due to your late arrival and road conditions, we will assume that someone on standby trying to get home, maybe a returning soldier and his buddy get your seats since you arrive late for the flight...

It scares the heck out of me to think that the second Chirstmas will be more difficult than the first one.........I am not going to think about it, I am having a hard enough time thinking about the day after tommorrow.  We are driving to Sedona, hopefully will not get stranded in the snow somewhere bewteen here and there.  Sedona is a gorgeous place and very spiritual, I know Bethany will be with us, she's never been to Sedona.

Warm Hugs to all of you,   Marcia    Bethany's Mom forever and ever

[ericasmom]

Okay Bonnie, I will go with the lovely thoughts of Marcia and pray instead for this. Either way, you will be exactly where you are needed most.

Love and joy to you.

Dee

a photo of Eri when she was 18 posing for graduation photo

[mpsmom]

Dee, Isn't she beautiful , the look on her sweet face seems that she is peaceful in another place... must be what she looks like now... she is so pretty.!!!

Your words are so very encouraging, the fact that it will get better someday is the hope I hold on to.

Warm Hugs, Marcia

[heartbeataway]

Marcia,

I like your idea.  I really hate lying that's why I want this to happen in a legtimate way. And I agree with Dee that whatever happens will be the right thing.

Part of our desire to be home is the difficulty of the holiday.  Last year we didn't want to be home. 

Dee, Erica is beautiful.  Angelic looking actually. 

Until later,

Bonnie

[mpsmom]

well, we are going away, I hope "it feels " like the right thing to do when we get there.  I dont know what will feel right .....    This is one of my favorite pictures of her, she is just barely 16 and on her trip to Greece....she loved it there.....maybe heaven reminds her of the ruins there.

Marcia

[heartbeataway]

Marcia,

Beautiful Bethany!  Very chic! 

Enjoy your time away ........  the best you can.

Bonnie

Picture is of Jason and his fiancee ....... their house, December 2007

[mpsmom]

Bonnie, they look so 'in love' ..... life just isnt fair sometimes...

Warm Hugs, Marcia    I will keep my fingers crossed about your flight.

[heartbeataway]

Our last Christmas Picture .......

[mpsmom]

It is just wonderful , is that you holding the little doggie?   You all look so cute in your matching jammies.   the perfect family .... We had a Christmas tradition to buy new Christmas jammies for each other every year, that was the package we opened on Christmas eve.. ....

[ericasmom]

Thanks Marcia and Bonnie, I love this photo of Erz as well. Her eyes look light brown here but they were really a darkish blue-green/hazel. You can see the freckle on her iris in her left eye. One of her friends wrote; I wonder if the person who woke with Eri's left eye, also has her freckle. I agree Bonnie, she looks angel like. Iremember the day we went for her photos, we went shopping afterward. I loved each angle and shot they sent to us in the proofs, this one is so contemplative, but captured the peaceful Erica. Marcia, if those of us here for a while can provide you with hope, then so much the better. Keeping hope alive is not always easy, but it is hugely needed in order to know that life still holds so much for us to do in this world.

Bethany looks beautiful as she moves through Greece, a beauty in a beautiful land.

sleep deeply All.

[mikesmum]

Just a note to all - Love the pictures of Bethany and Eri.  Both beautiful girls, gone too soon.  Eri seems to be looking beyond the moment....can't say why, just what I see. 

Bonnie - from what we hear here about the weather in the States, there is probably a good chance you will be snowed in!

Its 9pm Tues night.  Have cleaned the house, prepared the vegies, baked and am about to glaze the ham. 

I would like to thank each and everyone of you here at BI, for without you I wouldn't have made it through the 'tree' let alone the on slaught of guests. 

Mal is still 'resting', for some reason I have managed to get more done!

We had a call from a dear friend tonight. Her husband was diagnosed with Malignant myeloma 2yrs ago.  His remission has broken and he is home after a punishing round of chemo (the last stand).  With all that has been going on with them they wanted to ask us for dinner.  They said they knew Christmas was hard on us........makes the reality hit home.......:?

Take Care - Trudi

 

[cameronsmom1]

Summergirl, I had thought about calling them and letting them know what a great job the other place did and for how cheap. And best believe I will be spreading the word!LOL Hope you are doing well.

Amanda