I cry ugly for you
I cry ugly for you
The loss of you is so great
So raw, so painful, so deep
That I cry ugly for you
This is not the same type of crying over sad scenes in movies
It is wailing sounds that I didn't know that I could make
It is gasping for breath between sobbing
It is choking over the discoordination of tears, inhaling and exhaling
It is beet red in the nose, eyes and face
It is a deep pain felt in my chest
It is large drops of tears that soak the pillowcase
It is snot dripping down the nose mixing with tears
But it is also relief of my sadness for losing you mom,
The pain of not having you here
The loss of a future where we are together
The longing of wanting to hear your voice and to feel your embrace
So I cry ugly for you mom
I miss you mom
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