What positive can you list today?

[RichS]

Yesterday, I spoke to my friend's wife to console her. Her husband (who I've known for 55+ years), passed away two weeks ago. I shared with her some helpful tips on dealing with the early stages of grief. Two years ago, I wouldn't have been much help to her other than to say I'm sorry. I never thought much about this until recently; so I guess the positive here is that I'm able to share my experiences (for what it's worth) with those who are new at grieving.

[KayC]

Rich, I can see you doing that!  We learn through what we go through and who better than us to be there when our friends go through it! I wanted to send you a YOU ROCK gif but it won't even upload 15 kb, which is nothing, so take my word for it, YOU ROCK!
 

[KayC]

Went to Bible Study with Kodie last night, obnly five of us showed up but it was nice and I took Kodie to the park afterwards, looked like there was a bus convention there but no one bothered us in the rest area.

[Bou]

On 6/18/2024 at 7:36 AM, KayC said:

Sunday I went to the town's only carwash and asked when it'd be open again, to which the guy told me they'd just gotten it fixed and 15 min. later a lady rammed through the bar on a red light and wrecked it again.  Didn't sound like it'd be any time soon if ever. (Wouldn't her car ins. cover that???)

So yesterday morning it had poured rain and my car was all wet, so I got out my carwash brush and went over it (I can't turn on my outdoor faucets because of my 10% strength & not being able to shut it off), then poured a pitcher of water over it.  Yes it dried streaked but it got all the bugs off!  Better than nothing, will have to go to a carwash 60 miles away next time I go to the valley.

Doesn't it rain a lot in Oregon?  Use nature and suds it up before a rain storm.  Good thinking.   This reminded me of when he first passed away.  I got rid of my monthly car wash subscription.  Saved a little money.  I first thought I had to cut everything .....  that flight or fight thing. My car was cleaned by nature for a year and a half and once in a while the house hose.   How am I going to make it on one income?   We had a new one open up close to the house so I got it again and I go from time to time.  Something about relaxing and the smell of going through a car wash.  I love it.  As a child I hated it..... would freak me out like I was going to succumb  to monsters and suds.  

[KayC]

I did that following the night it rained hard, used the carwash brush, poured a pitcher of water on it, it helped with the bugs but left streaks...I posted about it somewhere on here.  
Yesterday I saw it open and went through it, have an appt to have detailing done in 1 1/2 weeks.

[KayC]

May have made my last trip to the food bank, the veggies are all rotten, no eggs and haven't had cheese for months (last one was moldy), they told me Kodie needed his vest on...it was in the 90s and with all his fur, no thank you.  It'd be okay if it was A/C but with their doors open, nope!  I drive quite a ways down there so not doing anymore.  Other people have ice cream, dinners, all kinds of stuff I can't eat.

BUT I got four 6" subs at Subway for $6.59 with FLBOGO and rewards, and Kodie gets the bread all cubed (I keep in the freezer until it's time to serve him a bit on his dogfood.  I tell him when he can't have my chocolate, I can't have his bread!  

 

[KayC]

Thankful for my A/C!

[WithoutHer]

11 minutes ago, KayC said:

Thankful for my A/C!

Me also don't do well with high temps. My window unit is 8000 btu's the same as your Amazon portable and today is the first of this year it's struggling. Peak was 96 here and it's running 3 degrees above it's usual setting. Can't keep up, and I have 60% of your sq footage, but I'm thankful it's still keeping me comfortable.

[KayC]

Supposed to be cooler today, low 70s, back to 80s by Tuesday.  I don't even know if my ceiling fan is set to summer or winter, it keeps changing here, it was 32 earlier this week!  Will check it once it stabilizes.  So my positive is it will be cooler for a couple of days.

Now if I could just hear from either contractor I've called, that would be a huge positive!

[foreverhis]

We on or near the actual coast of the Central Coast live our summers filled with foggy, damp, cool/cold, and often windy days because 10 miles inland gets very hot and draws in the marine layer.  It's similar to San Francisco.

From mid May to late August we can go days without "seeing the sun."  The past several weeks have mostly been that way with highs as low at 57, lows into the high 40s, and 20 mph winds all day.  That is until yesterday.  It started foggy, which is fine if it then burns off or retreats over the ocean for at least part of the day, but became glorious with warm sun, only a light breeze on and off, and 70 degrees.  This morning we awoke to clear skies, calm air, and 58 degrees at 7:30 am.  It's currently sunny with a very light breeze and 68 degrees.  It's forecast to be like this for the next 3 days.  We'll take it!

And on that note, I'm going to give Little Miss Hungry Girl her lunch snack and then go work in the garden--finally.  I hope everyone has a lovely day, regardless of the weather.

[JonathanFive]

Got it:  Very rough outline - a first draft outline, of 15 chapters for a self help book about loss.   Looks like I'll have this one written whilst I finish my PhD work, so before I actually get the three letters after my name.  But, its definitely something important to me.

There are chapters specific to "losing a child, spous, and parent."  There is a chapter on general and current psychology on grief.  There are some really interesting chapters on spirituality.   

But - rough draft outline.   I imagine I will spend another two weeks or three just outlining.  Then I have to research each chapter omg...    so its many months out before I actually have a book

 

[KayC]

I FINALLY got in touch with the contractor!  He's going to be up today to measure and put together his list of supplies...what I THOUGHT he did 7 1/2 weeks ago!  Will be elated if he does this and continues to follow through!  He told me last time it wouldn't take long, he'd get right on it, blah, blah, blah.  Fingers crossed and hail Mary's!!!

[KayC]

Today I cleaned off my ceiling fan (no easy task on stepstool, reaching wall for stability) and set it from winter to summer...couldn't see the setting so used a mirror.  Dusting it off wasn't easy either, it can accumulate quite a blanket of dust in a month!  Also did under bed with drawers as my clock's hand disappeared under there.  Lost an earring and never did find it!  Oh well, I felt good about my day's accomplishments, cleaned vacuum...it's showing signs of wear, of course, right after letting the warranty go ($550/year).  Figured I could buy a vacuum for that if need be!

Put a 1967 camera with all lenses, etc. out by my free sign.  Also tablecloths, cloth napkins, bibs (have lived here way too long!) placemats bouquet.  Whatever doesn't go, will go in the trash.

[widower2]

Kay you should hold onto that camera, it could be worth money as a collector's item!

[RichS]

2 hours ago, widower2 said:

Kay you should hold onto that camera, it could be worth money as a collector's item!

DEFINITELY!!!...........

[Rey Dominguez Jr]

Today, June 24, was our older son’s birthday.  He’s the moving company truck driver who is here on a break from the road for a couple of days.  For the first time in a few years he expressed a desire to go check out a new steak house.  Previously, when Veronica would ask him what he wanted to do for his birthday, he said he would rather not celebrate for some reason.  Then, out of the blue this weekend, he said we should go to this steak house.  What timing.  First year he actually wants to do something and his mom, my bride, is not here to celebrate.  Anyway, I took him and our younger son and DIL to dinner.  We all had a nice time together.  I paid for dinner, I was happy to, but Veronica’s absence seemed so loud to me.  Another “first” out of the way.  

[P777]

On 6/20/2024 at 3:37 PM, RichS said:

Yesterday, I spoke to my friend's wife to console her. Her husband (who I've known for 55+ years), passed away two weeks ago. I shared with her some helpful tips on dealing with the early stages of grief. Two years ago, I wouldn't have been much help to her other than to say I'm sorry. I never thought much about this until recently; so I guess the positive here is that I'm able to share my experiences (for what it's worth) with those who are new at grieving.

Sincerely sorry to your friends Wife for her loss, and yours too. This is extremely wonderful that you can offer help to her in giving advice. So beautiful. I dont think there is anyone better, than those who have lost, to offer help to others who have lost too. I find people in the last month or so have been telling me things about various traumas they have been through too, not even someone passing away, things like life traumas of various kinds. I think there is a special bond between people who have been through traumatic experiences. It is unique.

[KayC]

My motto this year is if I can't use it, get rid of it.  That can be said of many things I've given away, but with my hands hurting so bad, it's not feasible for me to research it...I tried and tried to find a flash for it years ago and came up empty.  

[Boggled]

On 6/23/2024 at 1:49 PM, foreverhis said:

This morning we awoke to clear skies, calm air, and 58 degrees at 7:30 am.  It's currently sunny with a very light breeze and 68 degrees.  It's forecast to be like this for the next 3 days.  We'll take it!

... there oughtta be a "jealous" emoji.       

3 hours ago, P777 said:

Sincerely sorry to your friends Wife for her loss, and yours too. This is extremely wonderful that you can offer help to her in giving advice. So beautiful. I dont think there is anyone better, than those who have lost, to offer help to others who have lost too. I find people in the last month or so have been telling me things about various traumas they have been through too, not even someone passing away, things like life traumas of various kinds. I think there is a special bond between people who have been through traumatic experiences. It is unique.

I too have been noticing that I'm now calling things like this "beautiful."  

[KayC]

It's 46 here but will be in the 80s today.  Had to run A/C last night, this morning my house is 68.  Not bad, will take Kodie to the park today since this weekend the bus event complete with tents took it over, closed to those who live here!  Had to pay $25 to get in, no thank you!

[ThereIsAField]

On 6/23/2024 at 11:06 PM, JonathanFive said:

15 chapters for a self help book about loss

Wow, that's great! 😊

[P777]

4 hours ago, Boggled said:

... there oughtta be a "jealous" emoji.       

I too have been noticing that I'm now calling things like this "beautiful."  

Yes definitely. I think most people (myself previously included) are racing around each day, and never stop to appreciate what is beautiful. This could be a kindness of others or simply a beautiful sunrise or sunset. However, when disaster strikes ie losing a loved one, I think it automatically shifts ones perspective on how we view things. Ever since my Wife passed away, I have been just taking each day as it comes, and trying my best for our Son, and trying to live, rather than exist. For years before my Wife passed, I was living in the future. Yes my circumstances have changed, dramatically, but like I said I try and appreciate all that is beautiful in life.

I must add, I have had a few instances where I know for a fact that it couldnt be coincidence. Just yesterday, one of my Wifes (and mine) favourite songs, came on, in the most unlikely place, just as I arrived there. Of course, I burst into tears, as it was a massive trigger, but I also smiled afterward, as this must have been a message to me, from either my Wife or God. Look out for signs folks, Im sure everyone gets them...

[KayC]

I slept a full night in spite of getting woke up three times, 1) Kodie alerting me to a skunk on the patio, 2) Kodie drinking a ton of water 3) Kodie barking in his sleep.  The third time I gave up, could have slept another hour but didn't need nine hours although I treasure those times!

18 hours ago, P777 said:

Ever since my Wife passed away, I have been just taking each day as it comes, and trying my best for our Son, and trying to live, rather than exist.

How I live as well...

[Boggled]

19 hours ago, P777 said:

I must add, I have had a few instances where I know for a fact that it couldnt be coincidence.

me too!!!

[Gail 8588]

The forecast here in Tallahassee  is a little bit better than it has been.  It has been over 100 three of the past four days. The week ahead it will be in the low 90's, possibly the high 80's a couple of days.  That will be a welcome change. 

Wish I'd get some rain as my grass is getting quite crunchy.

 

[RichS]

12 minutes ago, Gail 8588 said:

Wish I'd get some rain as my grass is getting quite crunchy.

Same thing in North Carolina. The grass is beginning to look like we're in the winter months.

[KayC]

My positive...I thought the DMV didn't send me my vehicle registration bill, someone said they were behind, but it would be due 7/7. So I went online to pay, needed a control number, don't have one, went out to the car to look for it, didn't find it but discovered it's not due for another year!  $136 of new found money! Every bit helps when you don't know what the back of your garage will cost.

[widower2]

12 hours ago, Gail 8588 said:

The forecast here in Tallahassee  is a little bit better than it has been.  It has been over 100 three of the past four days. The week ahead it will be in the low 90's, possibly the high 80's a couple of days.  That will be a welcome change. 

Wish I'd get some rain as my grass is getting quite crunchy.

 

I like my grass crunchy. Less mowing.  

[Gail 8588]

You just need to spray paint it green after awhile.🙂

[widower2]

Some people in Tucson actually do that to their "yard" (which is usually pebbles, not grass).

[Gail 8588]

I got about 10 minutes of rain today, so my grass got a short reprieve. 

[widower2]

Yeah we got a brief one too.

[shawnt]

The strawberries are ready!!!!!

[KayC]

I pick wild ones on our walks, they're extremely tiny but flavorful!  I share with Kodie, of course!

[Boggled]

We got a bit of rain yesterday too.  And rather than being in (Fahrenheit) mid-90s, temp was in 80s, it was a beautiful evening!  

[P777]

49 minutes ago, Boggled said:

We got a bit of rain yesterday too.  And rather than being in (Fahrenheit) mid-90s, temp was in 80s, it was a beautiful evening!  

We are back to normal in Ireland, rain every day 😂