Psychic medium?

[KayC]

11 hours ago, widower2 said:

Amen. Seems more and more people are becoming addicted to pitching a hissy fit. The media is largely to blame, but it's not all on them. 

Whatever is or isn't out there or how it works, who knows. But if people have had experiences that helped, more power to them. Whatever works! 

I so agree...FB is a prime example of how ugly can be...like the chat forums, it seems people can hide behind a screen, not realizing they are talking to REAL people with REAL feelings!

 

10 hours ago, Canadagirl81 said:

I said "You died on the 7th, you know that right?" and he looked at me...almost with this child-like smirk, like he knew some huge secret I didn't and he said "No I didn't beautiful, you'll see."

This is so beautiful!  I'd treasure that forever!

[Jemiga70]

On 3/25/2022 at 10:47 AM, Canadagirl81 said:

I watched the documentary "Surviving Death"

Canada Girl, yes that documentary is based on the book Surviving Death: A Journalist Investigates Evidence For An Afterlife by Leslie Kean, whom I respect as an investigative journalist. Havent seen it; dont have Netflix. Anyway thanks for sharing. You've helped me too!

[Canadagirl81]

Hugs @Jemiga70 Sending you so much love. 

[BlueFrog]

On 3/24/2022 at 8:03 AM, KayC said:

...I find it interesting if people have good dreams of them they attribute it to a visitation, if they have bad dreams, their subconscious...

I've had 4 dreams that I attribute to a visitation from my husband. I've had other dreams (where Tom showed up) that were unremarkable. For me, most dreams are just dreams. But those 4 stood out as a communication. Same with my Dad. A few dreams that felt strongly like a visit, and others that were just dreams. I did have one recurring dream where my Dad was still alive, but undercover somehow. Some strange conspiracy thing, or maybe witness protection. I attribute those to my mind trying to make sense of just not seeing him again (since his death was in car accident - sudden & unexpected. His casket was closed. So I just never saw him again). Those recurring dreams were just dreams.

[KayC]

12 hours ago, BlueFrog said:

For me, most dreams are just dreams. But those 4 stood out as a communication.

I think there is a distinction and if that happens, we well know it.  I've seen some people try to talk people out of believing that (my pastor's wife did that recently to someone), I would never do that!  I could see her just close down, that it was in a group setting made it all the worse.  She has a bad case of hoof and mouth disease and being a controller.  It's way offensive.

[widower2]

Regarding mediums, I thought this was a good read to guard against fakes. These people are verry good at playing the game and preying on vulnerable people.

https://www.psychics4today.com/cold-reading-techniques/

 

[Davijowely]

While I haven't visited a psychic medium myself, I've heard many uplifting stories from friends who have. One friend, who was struggling with grief after losing her father, found solace and closure through a medium's reading. It brought her immense comfort to feel his presence and receive messages of love and guidance. It's moments like these that remind us of the enduring bonds we share with our loved ones. Your journey of seeking connection with your mom resonates deeply with me. I recently stumbled upon an article on https://meaningspiritual.com that delved into the healing power of connecting with our departed loved ones.

[Gail 8588]

I have never visited a psychic, but I have heard from a few people that they were very comforted by such an encounter. 

My unqualified  belief (I have no data to back this up)  is that some psychics are bad people who are out to swindle vulnerable  people into giving them money and some psychics are good people who do try to provide comfort and closure to vulnerable people who are in distress. 

Whether any of them have any real psychic ability, I have no idea.  

If one chooses to go to a medium I would become more and more suspicious  if the medium wants you to come back again and again, or if the price of services goes up for better access or such.  Rely on the advice of a friend who is not so emotionally connected to the situation to assess whether this is a con designed  to separate you from your money.

Just my 2 cents.

 

[widower2]

9 hours ago, Gail 8588 said:

I have never visited a psychic, but I have heard from a few people that they were very comforted by such an encounter. 

My unqualified  belief (I have no data to back this up)  is that some psychics are bad people who are out to swindle vulnerable  people into giving them money and some psychics are good people who do try to provide comfort and closure to vulnerable people who are in distress.

I don't think there's any doubt about many being frauds. Houdini was famous for exposing many back when. They are very good at fooling people. Whether there are people with real such ability is harder to say of course. I will say if someone gets comfort from such a person, ultimately, does it matter? 

[Jemiga70]

Most mediums can't do what they claim. Absolutely some are dedicated frauds. But it would be unreasonable to throw the baby out with the bath water.

No ethical medium would encourage frequent repeat readings or grant a "better connection" in exchange for more money. In fact many mediums discourage a reading in the first 6-12 months after loss because the heaviness of our grief dulls our ability to fully absorb the info. Many will only see clients once a year. Some are also trained grief counselors and psychologists. Some mediums (Susanne Wilson comes to mind) even downplay their services to get us to focus on developing our own latent ability, for what that's worth.

There are researchers from Houdini's day who confirmed genuine mediumship. Arthur Findlay, Sir William Barrett, Dr Alfred Russel Wallace, Sir William Crookes, Sir Oliver Lodge, Dr Gustave Geley, Richard Hodgson, among others. Hodgson was particularly cynical but had to relent in the face of evidence.

More recent published controlled studies prove some mediums can in fact access information about the departed without the use of fraud or deception. Look at the work of Dr Julie Beischel (Windbridge), Dr Gary Schwartz (Univ of Arizona), the Division of Perceptual Studies (Univ of Virginia). Look at Leslie Kean's book, Prof David Fontana's book, and the Bigelow Institute for Consciousness Studies' essays.  After running a study on psychic functioning, Prof Jessica Utts gleaned the data and concluded "psi has been proven" and that there was no need to keep funding the study just to get the same result.

The arguments "there's no evidence" or "this can't be real, so I won't accept the data" don't cut it. Mountains of evidence, not only from mediumship, strongly suggest death is not the end.

Watch a gallery reading from Helping Parents Heal. Listen to a phone reading on Forever Family Foundation. Then decide for yourself.

And I would say Yes, it does matter that I get comfort from a medium who's NOT a fake. I don't wanna be fooled and I don't wanna fool myself.  I need evidence that suggests beyond a reasonable doubt that my wife's consciousness (spirit, soul) survived physical death. A genuine medium will bring forth evidence. That, along with my own personal experiences, offers me the ONLY comfort in grief, as well as "proof."

Windbridge, FFF and HPH maintain a database of ethical, tested mediums. That's where I looked. I took every precaution to satisfy my skepticism. I have no other explanation for what the medium told me except that she was either reading my mind (amazing in itself / proves psi, but unethical) or she was communicating with spirit. I ruled out fraud. I ruled out lucky guesses.  Interestingly, Dr Beischel did a study concluding that mediums can differentiate between a psychic reading (communicating with the living) and a medium reading (communicating with the departed).

A person has to discover these things for themselves if they choose to go down this road. Mainstream media is not gonna run this on the 6 o'clock news. A healthy skepticism is one thing; close minded cynicism (perhaps couching an agenda) is quite another.

"To upset the conclusion that all crows are black, there is no need to seek demonstration that no crow is black; it is sufficient to produce one white crow; a single one is sufficient."
- Prof William James

[widower2]

20 hours ago, Jemiga70 said:

There are researchers from Houdini's day who confirmed genuine mediumship. Arthur Findlay, Sir William Barrett, Dr Alfred Russel Wallace, Sir William Crookes, Sir Oliver Lodge, Dr Gustave Geley, Richard Hodgson, among others. Hodgson was particularly cynical but had to relent in the face of evidence.

More recent published controlled studies prove some mediums can in fact access information about the departed without the use of fraud or deception. Look at the work of Dr Julie Beischel (Windbridge), Dr Gary Schwartz (Univ of Arizona), the Division of Perceptual Studies (Univ of Virginia). Look at Leslie Kean's book, Prof David Fontana's book, and the Bigelow Institute for Consciousness Studies' essays.  After running a study on psychic functioning, Prof Jessica Utts gleaned the data and concluded "psi has been proven" and that there was no need to keep funding the study just to get the same result.

The arguments "there's no evidence" or "this can't be real, so I won't accept the data" don't cut it. Mountains of evidence, not only from mediumship, strongly suggest death is not the end.

I'm sorry but none of these people have evidence or proof of any kind about contacting people beyond death and there is no hard evidence one way or the other. They are only claims. Does that mean they are wrong? Not necessarily at all, but it's important to distinguish opinion/allegations/beliefs from cold hard facts. People are free to believe whatever they wish, but ultimately it is that - a belief  - not fact. We all have our beliefs, but I suspect none of us will ever know until we cross that threshold ourselves... 

[Gail 8588]

@Jemiga70

I am glad you have found a way to connect with your love.  We all need to take comfort where we can find it. 

I have felt John's  presence near me on many occasions. I have "heard" his counsel in my head.  I take great comfort from all of this. 

I have no problem with others using a medium to find that connection.  I just counsel caution if a significant amount of money becomes involved, because there are some people who will take advantage  of vulnerable griefstricken people.  Those bad actors are not limited to the psychic readings, but can be found on dating apps, estate sales services, car sales just to name a few.  In grief it is sometimes hard to see that people are taking advantage of our situation.  

[widower2]

Second that Gail. And the thing is many of them aren't bad actors; they are, unfortunately, very "good" actors (meaning very good at faking it). If they get someone's name/payment ahead of time, it's amazing what they can learn about that person on the internet (called a "hot read")...and even if not, if someone walks in off the street, they can do what is called a "cold read" and the better ones can make more often than not pretty accurate assessments about a person based on how they look, act, etc. And there are many other tricks they use. Again, I'm not saying all are fake. Nobody including me has any way of knowing that either way. Just that IMO it's a safe bet at the very least most of them are and to be on guard. 

 

[Jemiga70]

On 3/27/2024 at 12:38 PM, widower2 said:

I'm sorry but none of these people have evidence or proof of any kind about contacting people beyond death and there is no hard evidence one way or the other.

Who said anything about proof of contacting people beyond death? There's an ocean of evidence that consciousness can exist independent of the brain and that some mediums can retrieve information without deception or fraud. To claim there's no evidence is just ridiculous and reeks of gaslighting. I referenced a mere smidgen. What did I say about professional skeptics... one has to ignore the evidence to conclude there isn't any.

[Jemiga70]

On 3/27/2024 at 9:42 PM, widower2 said:

and the better ones can make more often than not pretty accurate assessments about a person based on how they look, act, etc.

So? Even if they can, it has absolutely nothing to do with whether they can bring forth evidential statements about the deceased that the sitter can verify as true. If one is really worried about being duped, take every precaution beforehand. This isn't difficult.

On 3/27/2024 at 9:42 PM, widower2 said:

Again, I'm not saying all are fake.

Then you're saying some mediums are genuine? I'm confused because in your post upthread of 12 March 2022 you wrote "No I haven't [sat with a medium], never would, and quite frankly I think it's all quackery and people praying on vulnerable people like us."

On 3/27/2024 at 9:42 PM, widower2 said:

And there are many other tricks they use.

You seem to know a lot about mediumship and the tricks the better fake mediums use without ever having sat with one.

On 3/27/2024 at 9:42 PM, widower2 said:

Nobody including me has any way of knowing that either way

Not true. Dr Beischel ran a quintuple-blinded study that ruled out the mediums in her control group were using hot reading, cold reading, voice cues, facial cues. The study also ruled out sitters' bias. Dr Schwartz ran similar studies. No fraud or deception.

And to keep repeating "medium" and "fake" in the same breath does a disservice to grievers who might be open to sitting with one. It creates a subconscious link between the two concepts. Grievers might automatically dismiss the idea altogether without knowing why. 

On 3/27/2024 at 10:46 AM, Gail 8588 said:

I am glad you have found a way to connect with your love.  We all need to take comfort where we can find it. 

I have felt John's  presence near me on many occasions. I have "heard" his counsel in my head.  I take great comfort from all of this. 

Thank you. I'm glad you have found comfort in keeping the connection with your husband.

[widower2]

 

3 hours ago, Jemiga70 said:

Who said anything about proof of contacting people beyond death? There's an ocean of evidence that consciousness can exist independent of the brain and that some mediums can retrieve information without deception or fraud.

Contacting people beyond death is the whole point of mediums and of this thread. And there is no "ocean" of evidence of consciousness existing in someone brain dead; there are at best dubious scraps IMO. Claims are not inherently facts.

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To claim there's no evidence is just ridiculous and reeks of gaslighting. I referenced a mere smidgen. What did I say about professional skeptics... one has to ignore the evidence to conclude there isn't any.

It's not ridiculous or gaslighting. I looked into your references above and again found little if any real evidence, only claims of it. I quickly add that at least some of those claims might be legit. But the key word there is might. 

Further, I quote one of your sources: 
“We can’t answer the questions,” Kean added. “We don’t try to do that in the series. But it’s about [the possibility that] there is something that happens after we die. Maybe death isn’t the end.”

Again, note the wording: the possibility of something, maybe death isn't the end. It's fine to have beliefs and opinions; it's not fine to state them as irrefutable facts.

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Then you're saying some mediums are genuine? I'm confused because in your post upthread of 12 March 2022 you wrote "No I haven't [sat with a medium], never would, and quite frankly I think it's all quackery and people praying on vulnerable people like us."

And again, key words: I think they aren't legit, but I don't know that for a fact. 

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You seem to know a lot about mediumship and the tricks the better fake mediums use without ever having sat with one.

It's not hard. A simple 'net search is all it took.

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Not true. Dr Beischel ran a quintuple-blinded study that ruled out the mediums in her control group were using hot reading, cold reading, voice cues, facial cues. The study also ruled out sitters' bias. Dr Schwartz ran similar studies. No fraud or deception.

I looked it up. Interesting, but it was an extremely tiny sample size (readings done for a mere 8 people), therefore much easier for numbers to be inaccurate/inconclusive. If the readings were done for like 800 people and they got the same results, I'd put a lot more stock in it.

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And to keep repeating "medium" and "fake" in the same breath does a disservice to grievers who might be open to sitting with one.

Pointing out that there are fakes out there and people should be on guard for them hardly does them a disservice; quite the contrary.

That all said, if someone visits a medium and feels confident they are legit, great. It may very well be that they were and I'm wrong. I've been wrong many times in my life.  But I'm speaking generally, not about any specific one, and there are frauds out there and I think people should be aware of that. 

 

[Sar123]

@Jemiga70 I like this quote from Albert Einstein, “ Energy cannot be created or destroyed, it can only be changed from one form to another.” 

My husband and I did not belong to any church or religion (his parents were Christian Science and mine were Catholic) Neither set of parents were devout Christians or anything like that. We never  joined a church and we didn’t raise our kids with any type of religion. Sometimes I think it might be a little easier to deal with this grief if I was a devout Christian and belonged to a church. 
 

Anyway, my kids and I did see an evidential medium via zoom. I fell apart when I had to put our dog down last August and I decided I wanted to see a medium to help me through this period where I lost my husband and our dog within the same year. I had a healthy dose of skepticism going into this. I wasn’t quite sure what to expect. There’s a good post by a certified medium fromThe Forever Family Foundation called  “Are Mediums Real or Fake.” She gives good guidelines on how to spot a fraudulent medium. I felt pretty good about the medium I picked out. She told us things no one else could have possibly known. There were a couple of things that I had never told anyone- how could she have possibly known? She also said my son and his wife would be having another baby and that’s how I found they were expecting - they hadn’t told anyone yet. Lucky guess? Maybe, but it sure was happy news. There was just so much to take in (my mother came through too. One of the things she kept mentioning didn’t make a lot of sense at the time. When I asked my sister about it, she was shocked because she had never told anyone about it- until now). I still question it all at times, but I can’t come up with an explanation at how she knew things that were never told to another person. She captured my husband’s upbeat personality and she had us smiling at times during the reading. It was worth it just for that. I think if you do your research, you can find an authentic medium. Yes, it is expensive and I’m lucky I can afford it although it does bother me that they charge so much which makes it pretty much impossible for people who don’t have that kind of money for a reading. I haven’t told too many friends that I went to a medium. My husband didn’t believe in them and would think I’ve lost my mind, lol. 
 

Thanks for sharing what you know about mediums. I appreciate it. 

[Jemiga70]

On 3/31/2024 at 9:40 AM, Sar123 said:

I like this quote from Albert Einstein, “ Energy cannot be created or destroyed, it can only be changed from one form to another.”

Einstein: “Everyone who is seriously involved in the pursuit of science becomes convinced that some spirit is manifest in the laws of the universe, one that is vastly superior to that of man.”

On 3/31/2024 at 9:40 AM, Sar123 said:

I fell apart when I had to put our dog down last August and I decided I wanted to see a medium

I'm so sorry. I lost my mother in law shortly after my wife passed. As if one grief wasn't enough we have to deal with multiple in the same span.

On 3/31/2024 at 9:40 AM, Sar123 said:

There were a couple of things that I had never told anyone- how could she have possibly known?

If you ruled out fraud and lucky guesses then what are you left with? 1) Mind reading - she read your mind (which proves psi)  BUT you said you weren't aware that your son and daughter in law were expecting and that one of the things your mother mentioned didn't make a lot of sense to you at the time, but made sense to your sister - so we can rule out those particular statements as mind reading;  2) The medium was communicating with a non-material intelligence. What about lucky guessing? It's beyond what's statistically significant for publication in academic journals. In other words, the odds are astronomical she was simply guessing.

On 3/31/2024 at 9:40 AM, Sar123 said:

She captured my husband’s upbeat personality

Typical of many legitimate medium readings.  Not something you can "hot read" on Google or FB.

On 3/31/2024 at 9:40 AM, Sar123 said:

Yes, it is expensive and I’m lucky I can afford it although it does bother me that they charge so much [...]

Well, it depends on how we define "expensive." One person's $150 is another's coffee money. I know of one medium who will negotiate a fee based on a person's ability to pay. I've seen him work (via Zoom gallery reading) and it left no doubt he is the real deal.

On 3/31/2024 at 9:40 AM, Sar123 said:

My husband didn’t believe in them and would think I’ve lost my mind, lol. 

My wife dismissed anything that wasn't of the 5 senses. But since she had a thorough university education in dogmatic materialism, that would figure. Nevertheless, she came through in my reading. And also despite MY skepticism she came through.

I'm glad your experience was validating.

[Jemiga70]

On 3/30/2024 at 2:24 AM, widower2 said:

And there is no "ocean" of evidence of consciousness existing in someone brain dead; there are at best dubious scraps IMO.

I'm not going to go further with this. It is your opinion that there aren't mountains of published evidence that consciousness is not dependent on the physical brain - that doesn't preclude that evidence in fact exists.

That the Spirituality topic was jettisoned to a hard-to-find junk drawer of the main site - as though it were dangerously radioactive - speaks volumes, it really does. I'm done here.

[widower2]

When a claim is made, the onus of evidence/proof is on the claimant. IMO you have not provided any and I've explained why. Ultimately I'm OK with agreeing to disagree, but apparently that's asking too much of you. 

Calling another section of the site a "junk drawer" first off makes zero sense. If a simple mouse click or two to get here is too much to ask of you to discuss these things, then I'd say you weren't really serious about wanting to discuss them in the first place.

Further, religious topics in fact are in a way " dangerously radioactive" - or maybe a better term is "highly flammable" from an emotional perspective - and you're proving why. That is one of several reasons why the site is set up this way and by the way a very common feature among message boards in general. In fact, many forbid religious discussion outright for that very reason: far too often people prove incapable of discussing such things in a calm, rational, and civil way. There are your "volumes." 

But more to the point, your snarky comments are out of line and will no longer be tolerated. If you can't discuss something calmly and rationally, then don't do it at all.