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thoughts about the road so far


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Its been over 3 years now and I have done much to facilitate my progress into understanding and accepting the reality.

I still to not "understand" but I believe that I do accept.

The hardest thing is to understand that "things which take time" do actually take time. Every day is tough and long, but could it be any other way? If I did truly lose a part of myself (as I feel I did) then can one come to terms with that quickly?

I think not.

However that does not mean that you can not come to terms with it, for you can.

Our society (and in my view more particularly is the US society which influences us even here in Australia) is geared towards the young, selling a dream of life ahead. There is no longer any thought or assistance for us in mainstream works for the other parts of our lives ... and that also included dealing with death.

I encourage all here to actively pursue finding knowledge and wisdom in response to our loss. By following that path you can find the strength to live and be better.

I live every day and cope with the losses like a human with pride ... like the man my wife loved. Equally I'm not afraid to cry, and from time to time I still do. But it is by our strength that we can actually do what humans are really also designed to do - help others.

I know in the first year or so the last thing on your mind is helping anyone ... but I've found that by just going on, by being at work and making occasional inputs into others difficulties that I've helped.

She died and to me there is no good in that. But if that event can make me a better person then perhaps that's a good goal. I had no choice about her death (undiscovered brain tumor) but I do have a choice about who I become. Should I be only a wreck or should I be a man she would still love and respect.



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Dear obakesan

So sorry to hear about your loss, she was a beautiful woman, and that is a lovely picture. Today as you noted there isn't many resources for grieving with loss. I have found the hope in the bible as a way to deal with, understand death, and the grieving process. It has a logical approach to death, the reason why it happens, and the solution to it.

Please take the time to examine the attached link.       https://www.jw.org/en/publications/magazines/watchtower-no3-2016-may/#?insight[search_id]=94b58d88-0ace-48e5-945c-1d5e181dc837&insight[search_result_index]=1


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