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lost my mom, trying to cope

norman j

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I'm sorry to say this, but I don't think one can get past it, one can deal with it and face the awful sadness and anxiety brought by the loss of one's parents, and you will continue to live in changed context.

There's no scape from grief I'm afraid, it's with us every day, but I guess it gets less overwhelming as the years go past, or so I hope for our sake.

However, the void will always be there for as long as we live.

If a person doesn't grief properly, it may catch up with him/her later on in a more serious manner.

In other words, and as CindyJane, a forum member has said many times, we do not get over it but rather get on with it, with life, as our parents would want us to.

However, you can share on this forum, tell us about your mom and feelings whenever you feel like it, and nobody will judge you. You can also find counseling and similar support, spiritual guidance, exercise and eat well, share your feelings with close friends and loved ones and try to live as best as you can one day at the time.

Everybody grieves differently, but still sadly there is no formula that can erase the pain.

Please try to self care and let the tears flow when they come, yell when you feel like it & be gentle to yourself, and give yourself time.

I'm really sorry for your loss, I miss my mom every single day and think about her several times a day, in my dreams, prayers, at work, always, she was, is and always will be my everything.

Warm regards

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Thank you Trish91. I haven't allowed myself a chance to grieve. Part of me still pretends she is home and too busy to chat. I've immersed myself in work, my kids, and helping dad cope. But now we are getting ready to seal mom's ashes in the bench my dad bought with a grave sight prayer service and i feel lost. This is it... No more busy work. Her final resting. No more pretending she is home. I'm not ready for good bye.

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Norman, I am so sorry for the loss of your mom.  Further to something Trish said, it does get less overwhelming in time.  I still miss my mom and dad greatly and think about them every day but as time is passing I have come to the acceptance of losing them and that acceptance does make it easier.  That being said, it took me awhile to accept that within a 1 year period I went from having 2 relatively healthy parents to having no living parent.  


Take all of the time that you need to grief your way through this.  You WILL miss your dear mom greatly but just know that she is in a good place and one day when it is your turn to go "home" you will be reunited with her again.  I don't just believe this .... I KNOW IT!


God bless you and take care....you are not alone


Cindy Jane

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