Lost my Dad 2 years ago, i am torn between my mom and what my dad said before his passing.

[McGrublin]

 2 years ago I lost my dad in a ski doing accident in valemont bc. At the time I was 19 years old but now I am 21. There is a very long history behind my parents and there relationship, but to sum things up my and I moved out in gr7 and in gr11 we moved back in. When I graduated I had moved out almost right away leaving my mom and my dad. I had thought mom had been sneaking around on dad but never dug or anything just thought it and that was it. I vaguely remember to the point I wanna say it was in a dream but the more I think about it the more I realize that it happened and it wasn't a dream. My father had called me a little while before he passed and had said that my mom had been seeing a guy from his work and ofcourse u can imagine how the conversation went... I can only remember bits and pieces and im trying so hard to remember it all. My mom recently gave me her old blackberry that she hasn't used in over 4 years. and going throught that phone I found proof that mom was sleeping around... Now if this is the case there could be the possibility that my dad came home the night before he left on his trip and snuck into the house to find mom and that there could have been somebody there. now my dad worked for a major oil company as a head mechanic. that company left my MOM very well off. I Love my mom but if this is all true I don't wanna have anything to do with her and I don't think that she deserves any of what she has gotten. I am torn between having my mom and my half sister and being ok or confronting my mom and if I get the answer I think im gonna get that I will never speak to her again and then I have nothing I am a 21 year old male getting through life alone.

[ModKonnie]

McGrublin,

I am very sorry about the loss of your father. I certainly understand your anger and pain over a possible betrayal between your parents; however, I believe you should seek some appropriate counseling and guidance before doing something so permanent as cutting your mother out of your life. Their relationship was obviously complicated by the sounds of things, but obviously, your father wanted her to be taken care of in case something happened to him. 

 

I am certainly not a counselor or professional, but I believe your relationship with your mother should not be tied to what may or may not have happened between her and your father. Long-term adult relationships can be complicated and difficult, and possible betrayal doesn't necessarily mean they didn't love each other. 

 

In any case, we will be here for you,

 

ModKonnie