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Impact of loss on surviving loved ones


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I am writing to ask for some insight on how to help, how best to support, when my significant other is grieving over the loss of her father. He passed three weeks ago, was sick for two years. Since his passing, and even before that, she seems to be lashing out at the people closest to her in so many ways. I want to do the best I can to help her through this, to minimize her stress, etc. But I have to admit that it can be so difficult to take so many 'attacks'. I understand why she is going through this, but I am getting to the end of my own rope. I love her so much and want to continue this relationship, and to be there for her. Any similar experiences or suggestions? At this point she is not receiving any counseling, and quite frankly I am afraid to bring it up to her...

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I would suggest she find a grief support group or a grief counselor or pastor. Stress like a death can either strengthen or tear a relationship apart. Couple counselling is another option. She has to work through her grief which could take a long time and it is work. Help her heal by suggesting walks,perhaps at the beach or mountains or other forms of exercise,eating well, getting lots of rest, focusing on nature, etc. She is still in a very early raw stage of grief. Hold her hand, hug her and listen to her. Just knowing you are there caring ,loving and supportive should help her a great deal.

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Dear Members,

We are excited to mention that we are moving to a more new and improved message boards on MONDAY MORNING AUGUST 9th! The boards will be done for a few hours while we are making the conversation. Remember we posted information about this move a month ago. For some of you this might seem a bit sudden,  but when we were reviewing the site we determined the current message board you are using is out of date and the company that designed it is no longer in existence. The good news is this new message board will have new features that have been requested in the past like more fields we can add to your profiles and a chat room up to 20 people at one time. If we find the chat room is bursting at the seams we will add additional room for extra people. All your old posts, private messages and such will be migrated to the new message board. You might have to put up your profile picture again but not sure. The new company will be doing the migration for us. Here is a short list of some of the new features on the board:

- Custom Profile Fields

- Users can customize their profile pages by selecting a background color or background image, with tiling options.

- Facebook and Twitter Integration

- users can respond to multiple posts at once with "mini-quote"

- Pinned discussion threads - like welcome to our board etc.

- Announcements made across some boards or the entire message board

- Search: Users can easily find all content generated by a particular member, by clicking the 'Find Content' button that appears on the main profile page, or in the Mini Profile Popup which can be accessed throughout the board. The results page allows content to be filtered by application, as well whether the member created it or merely participated in it.

- Privacy: allows users to sign in anonymously, hiding them from the online users list. Users also have the option to disable personal conversations and user-to-user emails, as well as ignore other users if necessary.

The next exciting piece of news about the new message board is it will have a new domain name of www.grieving.com for search engine optimization purposes. It will still be apart of Beyond Indigo and can be found through www.beyondindigo.com. We will be redirecting your current URL's to this new domain name but we might miss a few. If that is the case simply go back to www.grieving.com or www.beyondindigo.com to find your message board thread. We will try to make the transition as seamless as possible.

The bottom line is the new board will give us room to grow our community and more options to interact better with each other.

If you have any questions please direct them to feedback@beyondindigo.com.

Kelly Baltzell, MA


Beyond Indigo Family

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