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missing dad!


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how do i tell you how much i miss you! how do i put such feelings on paper? anger that you left me and at god for taking you from me even though i wasnt ready????? i miss taking to you everyday, and seeing you, i always felt the closest to you, being the youngest of 5 kids and you retireing from farming when i was 20 so i spent more time with you! i also think that we were more the same then the other 4 kids, i always felt this connection that just you and i shared, and when you died, i felt alone....... suddenly all alone in the family! i still do~! you know what i mean! here i am my 30th birhtday on april 6th and you are not here! why do i feel that all the things that i was supposed to do by this age, have not happened on part due to you? i love you and miss you so much, yet here i am 30 and not married(or no boyfriend) and no children, part because i think i always measure up to you! You are(were) the most important person in my life(i think mom knows.) how do imove forward without you? it has been 1 yr and 4months and the pain is as real today as it was the day i got that call!




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