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Christmas ide


arc4ever

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Hello everyone.  I have only posted a couple of times.  My 16 year old son Adam passed away as a result of injuries due to an automobile accident March 25, 2008.  Adam was driving to school.  He was our only child.  His birthday was November 1st.  I struggle with loneliness quite a bit.  He was such a joy to have around, so full of laughter and smiles.  I am posting on the Loss of Adult Child because that seems to be the posts I read the most often.  My husband and I survived Thanksgiving by staying home and watching movies.  I just sat and did my Christmas cards for this year.  The only reason I did the cards was a selfish one.  I included a note to the recipients along with a self-addressed stamped envelope.  I asked them to write a memory that they had of Adam and return it to us.  My husband and I will open these memories on Christmas morning.  That will be our gifts for Christmas, our family and friend's memories of Adam.  We are going away for a few days for Christmas.  I can't be at home.  We were the "host" family for my husband and my families for the past several years.  Forty people for dinner and gift exchange at our house.  I can't be there this year.  I don't know if it is right or wrong to go away, we are just trying to make it thru. 

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I LOVE THE IDEA WHAT A GIFT FOR THEM TOO TO BE ABLE TO REMEMBER YOUR SWEET BOY...I LOVE IT, ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT...

BEST WISHES TO YOU. ALL WE CAN DO IS PRAY AND ASK FOR GUIDENCE...IN OUR LOSS

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Losing your only son has altered your life forever.  I love your idea of sending out cards asking for memories to be sent back so you can read about your boy at Christmas.  Friends of my son have gone through photos from their youth and send the ones with Mike to me.....memories and stories I might never have seen or heard.

There is no right or wrong way to make it through the holidays.  My first Christmas I just wanted my immediate family to be with us.   It was what we needed. 

Take Care - Trudi

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This will be my second christmas without Bobbi so all I want around me again ia my daughter Melissa my grandson and my son in law. My husband and I will celebrate it with them again this year. The only thing my daughter misses is the sugar bear ornament on the tree I gave it to Bobbi in 2006 for Andrew and it is now missing. Melissa would like to have it on her tree to remember childhood christmases. This year is a little easier than last but it is still lonely with her not here. I just hope Melissa's boyfriend finds a job or gets into his majors class or they may be moving to California 2000 miles away from me and it will feel like I'm losing my other daughter also. She told me this last night she does'nt want to go but she loves him she does'nt want to leave the memories. I'm already dreading this.

Deb

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I saw your note and appreciated it alot.  My son died 12/07, 2 days before Christmas.  So I just went through the 1st anniversary of his death.  I keep reading and hearing that you have to do what feels right for you.  I'm still figuring out what that means for me.  Take care.  Becky

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