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social security check


JennyC23

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I am a full time college student and my husband was my only source of income. When he died I went to social security and was awarded a mounthly income. A few days ago the bum in my basement (long story) checked the mail and handed my four checks to the amount of around five thousand. I started laughing because finially I could pay my bills and pay off my debts then I burst into tears and could not stop crying for a while. I would rather be broke and indebt with him beside me that rich without him. I am stuck in the idea that I have money and can pay my bills . . .because my husband is gone. How am I suposed to feel about this? I know, I know, I am suposed to feel that he is taking care of me from beoyond but damn it, I miss him. I want him here to take care of me!

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Jenny, my circumstances are very different to yours but I can relate to what you are saying. My wife had benefit income and Life insurance which now come to me. I feel as you do that I don't care about the money I just want my wife back. Like many people we used to dream about what we would do if we won millions on the lottery but if I won millions today I cant think of a single thing to do with it other than give it all to charity.

However you have to have an income to live and your partner would want you to have the money and you deserve it much more than most. The problem is that its just another reminder of your loss, and we get too many of those each day.

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