Members MissuDad Posted March 27, 2014 Members Report Share Posted March 27, 2014 Hello everyone, Today would be the day that my dad would celebrate his 77th birthday and one year since I last saw him... It´s so weird to feel that a year has passed so quickly and I´ll never see him again This feeling is really weird, but wherever he might be, I wish him a happy birthday and I know I will always love him and never forget him! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mwruby1 Posted March 27, 2014 Members Report Share Posted March 27, 2014 Hello missudad,I am sure your father is looking down on you. He knows you love/loved him. I lost my dad 3 years ago, in which his birthday just passed. I still have my moments, when it gets difficult from thinking about him. The important thing is you remembered his birthday, which shows him you haven't gotten about him. Hang on to your good memories you had with your father. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ChelseaRaeMiller Posted March 27, 2014 Members Report Share Posted March 27, 2014 Thinking of you, missudad. First birthdays, holidays, get togethers ect are always the hardest.Wishing you peace.Here if you need to talk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members MissuDad Posted March 28, 2014 Author Members Report Share Posted March 28, 2014 Thank you both for replying and thanks Chelsea for your kind words on your posts You are a really sweet person This day was weird, I can´t say good or bad, it was just weird. I had to go to work and do the normal stuff, but the memory kept popping up... Then no one looked for me, like giving me some company, if I hadn´t gone looking for lunch company, I would end up alone After work went to my therapy and then went out for dinner, but the thought was always there along with my mom´s condition of having to get her kidney removed. Today just felt too much heavy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ChelseaRaeMiller Posted March 28, 2014 Members Report Share Posted March 28, 2014 Sometimes I think people are afraid to reach out to us grieving cause they feel if they mention it then it will hurt us more. Its good you went searching for company. You shouldn't be alone if you don't wish to be alone. I'm sorry about your mother. I do hope she's okay, missu. I'm sure you're very scared. Big hugs! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members MissuDad Posted March 31, 2014 Author Members Report Share Posted March 31, 2014 I´m terrified I know it´s not na uncommon procedure, but I´m just so scared of losing my mom too I think I´m in denial, cuz I keep avoiding the subject... It´s really hard, specially in this period, I keep thinking of similarities, stuff like my dad died on the 18th of April and my mom could get the surgery arounf that time... It´s really hard trying not be scared or thnking positively A big hug Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members k.damir Posted March 31, 2014 Members Report Share Posted March 31, 2014 MissuDad, I am sorry you have to go through all these things. But we, your online friends, are here for any support like you support us. Big hug! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members MissuDad Posted April 2, 2014 Author Members Report Share Posted April 2, 2014 Thank you all for the kind words Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Trish91 Posted April 7, 2014 Members Report Share Posted April 7, 2014 Dear MissU, How's your mom? Did she already have her surgery? Please have faith that everything will be fine. A lot of people lose a kidney these days and continue to live a good life. Lots of people now have kidney transplants and manage to survive. So, please keep the faith and be there, be strong for your mom. Do you have any other brothers or sisters? Are you married with kids? What about cousins, uncles, aunties? You said you live in Portugal, are families large over there? Are people, in general, more supportive than in other places and cultures? Sorry to ask you so many questions, and please feel free to ignore them if you find them too intrusive. It just seems that you have got a lot of responsibilities over your shoulders. However, you do seem to be doing the right things and be on the path towards recovery and healthy grieving, so I admire you for that, as I'm still completely lost and heartbroken. Anyway, I just wanted to say hello, since I've been way too busy and hadn't had time to write till today, although I read the posts every single day. I'm really glad his birthday wasn't overly traumatic, but what about the one year anniversary? Is it coming or has it already happened? Sorry if I'm mixing things up, and asking silly questions, it's pretty late here, and I'm exhausted. Warm regards, Trish Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members MissuDad Posted April 8, 2014 Author Members Report Share Posted April 8, 2014 Hi Trish, Thank you for your concern No, the surgery is not done yet, I want to have a second opinion from another doctor and would want my mom to have a less invasive procedure. I only have a sister and a niece, we have big and small families here, my immediate family is small. My sister had a depression a few years ago and she´s very much hyponcondriac and obsessed about doctors which makes everything more difficult, if I say a doctor´s name she starts na endless conversation and repeats herself over and over... My niece is only 21, only a teen. Regarding support I think it´s the same everywhere, everyone´s supportive for the first few months and then they assume you´ve moved on just because you smile a bit more and it gets harder and harder to mention the subject... These last few weeks have been hard, I can´t relax because I´m terrified about my mom. then my best friend´s grandfather died and the cremation was held at the same place as my father´s, so witnessing all that was overwhelming, I would look strong on the outside, but was afraid of collapsing on the inside... The one year anniversary is in one week and a half, for what I´ve experienced so far, the days leading to those dates seem to be more difficult than the days itself, we´ll see how that goes. Sometimes I just wish for a break and not feeling so lonely on this journey, I have no partner nor kids, just the family and a few friends. Thank you once again for caring How have you been holding on? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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