How do i raise my teenegers alone?

[kellymcg]

My husband committed suicide four months ago. We have a 19 yr old, 18,17 and 15. I had to move them because he did it in our home of 12 yrs. We are in a much smaller space and they are fighting constantly. I don't know what to do. I can barely function myself.

[Comfort4U]

Hello Newbie,

 I can only imagine what you are going through and to have four teenagers at that, have a ton of respect for you. Im sure that all of you are dealing with the death of this important man differently, and that is to be expected you know, everyone wont deal with it in the same way. Just as you all moving into a smaller space it is dealt with very differently and yet this is not a bad thing because who knows perhaps having that much space would allow one to completely isolate themselves. A smaller space can be looked at as a good thing in order to help all of you deal with the loss. It, in a real sense, allows you all to be closer to one another which is a very good idea at this time. It allows you all to get your feelings out in the open and help each other. Sometimes dealing with teenagers is hard because the feel as if you do not understand their feelings, and you do. Ask them to express their feeling and be honest with you about them and remember not to judge them for how they feel, their father is no longer with them and they do not know how to adjust their feelings. One thing I appreciate the most is and article I read that had a scripture in it from 2Corinthians4:8 which says "“We are hard-pressed in every way, but not cramped beyond movement; we are perplexed, but not absolutely with no way out." Which helped me to know that  in such cases, there is something you can change: your outlook on the situation. By learning to accept what you cannot change, you become more likely to view things from a more positive standpoint. You are also more likely to look for ways to cope with the situation rather than resort to drastic means to end it. The result? You start to take a measure of control of what seems to be an uncontrollable situation. This is from an article I read on JW.ORG and the article is in the magazine Why Go On. I encourage you to read it and hope that you find much comfort in the article. please contact me if you want to talk more i am here for you.