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Watched Mom Die 6mon ago. PTSD?


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Guest Kirbibizzle

Dear jjenner,


I witnessed the same exact thing with my father. I only lost him a little over a week ago. He suffered from a ruptured brain aneurysm which led to a stroke. He stayed in a coma for 3 days and the doctors basically told me that he would never be the same again. The left side of his brain had too much damage. He would never be able to care for himself again. He never would have wanted to live like that. I, too, was forced to make the devastating decision to end his life.


I'm also 25 years of age. We're both much too young to be losing a parent already. I've been going through the same feelings you have, the chest pains especially. I try to block it out as best I can, but when I picture him lying in the hospital during those last moments. I find myself unable to catch my breath. I keep wishing I could have done something different to have prevented this, but I know it was inevitable. He was going to be gone one day, it just happened so suddenly and so soon.


In my personal opinion, you are grieving normally. As normally as possible with something like this anyways. This is going to take time. It's going to hurt... a lot. She's your mother, no child should have to see their parent go through something like that. Since no two people grieve at the same pace, something like this could take a while until it finally doesn't hurt as much as it does right now, but one day I hope that you can find peace in all of this tragedy.


I hope the same for myself each and every day.

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When you loose someone really close it's a very traumatic experience. There is grief , depression , and maybe PTSD.

Losing my Dad has changed my life completely and left me very depressed.


It is possible to have PTSD  if as well as the symptoms you mention , you have sleep problems, panic attacks and are irritable and your everyday functioning is affected.


It all depends on how severe the shock has been to you.


I know I am very depressed, I don't need a doctor to tell me that, and I have panic attacks and tears when something  reminds of the absence of my Dad, and yes I get that 'heavy heart' and dull pain feeling also.

I sleep until mid-day, sometimes 2pm,  because it makes the day shorter and I have nothing to do anymore now I don't look after my Dad and no one to chat to.


It can take a long time to recover , depending upon how close you were to your Mum, but you will never be the same again , I can tell you that much. I have discovered that for myself - losing someone you loved is a life-changing event, but eventually, so I am told, you learn to 'live with it'. I haven't learned to live with yet - my Dad passed away 3 months ago.


It is possible to get locked into depression, which is where I think I am.


You are suffering physical symptoms, like me, and you should go and see your doctor and explain your situation.

I think you may be suffering from depression, so get checked out.


Good luck.

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Guest Kirbibizzle



You may be on to something. Now that I've experienced it first hand, losing a parent is pretty much the most traumatic thing I can think of someone going through.


I wish I could sleep until 2 pm like you have been, and that's how I usually used to sleep before my dad passed, but now I can't stop myself from waking up at the crack of dawn. I've never been able to wake up this early before. I can't go back to sleep because I keep wondering how I could have saved my father's life. It's physically painful to feel this way.


I was already depressed as it was before all of this happened, and this may keep me locked in depression for good. I feel like this is destroying me from the inside out. My best friend who I've been with for the entire 25 years of my life is gone. Not to mention the whole "I feel like I am guilty for his death" thing.... don't get me started on that part.


I can't even picture the moment where I will learn to live with this. I will just wade through the fog that will be the rest of my life in sorrow. The future for me looks pretty bleak right now. I can't accept he is gone without speaking to him at least once more. I wish he would just come to me in my dreams already and tell me not to worry. I haven't been able to dream at all. Not about him, not about anything. All I want is to be forgiven.


Where are you, dad?

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