It doesnt really get "better"

[findingpeace]

Its like losing your limbs and learning to live with it. You adapt to a lifestyle with your handicap because the truth is you have no choice. You still have responsibilities and you are still "alive". Maybe not "living" but definitely alive. Its like someone came and yanked your heart right out of your body yet youre still walking around. We will never comprehend how something so unnatural can happen- how could you be alive when your baby is gone. Its unnatural to live in this state.

its been almost 6 months since my 7 month old passed away in an accident. Does it really get better.. or are we just adapting every day. Learning to live with the pain and emptiness. Do we have a choice? No.. all we do is learn, adapt.. to live with this pain..

my only advice to anyone whos reading.. i know youre not the same person as before, i know you dont feel the same way as before.. but learn to adapt to the new you.. the new world.. the new perspective. And we owe it to ourselves to remain positive so we can be an inspiration to those around us and not just a tragedy. im trying to follow my own advice everyday.. sometimes its an ordeal but its the only way..

And pat yourself on the back for the little achievements.. humming an old tune, smiling at a joke, craving a food.. its all good progress.

Im going to see my son one day.. this life is very temporary..

[dsmurph]

Finding Peace, Everything you wrote is what I am going through and how I feel, except my daughter was 14. I don't know how I continue everyday but, yet somehow I do. I know the benefits of trying to stay positive and yet somedays it overtakes me. This is my grief. Like you, I know I will see her again. She is around us now, we know that, we feel her. Like you, I also know this life is so temporary, and then we move on to our continued life, after this one. Hugs

[NeverAndAlways]

The best reply I've ever heard to the question 'does it get any better?' is "No, but you get better at coping with it".

I don't think getting better at coping with it is a continuously improving skill...I think you take a few steps forward, and few steps back...but overall, you get better at existing/surviving over time. I still won't say 'living' but I can't promise that I never will. Because the 'continued life' is not just the next one...its the one tomorrow too...and I can't count how many times I've been surprised (pleasantly or unpleasantly) at what another day brings (and brings out of me).

Looking forward to meeting all of you and all of them...when we get there.

N&A

[L&L]

I am new to this group.

We lost our son 6 years ago to cancer and continue to feel sad. We were fortunate to have a bereavement counselor until a few months ago. I do feel life continues and can enjoy but it is certainly different. Losing a child is losing our future, especially one who was beginning a successful career and an awesome person.

There are not many choices but to allow ourselves to feel and live life the best that we can. We are survivors and it can be tiring to be told how strong we are. The bottom line that I am sure that you can all agree that life can be unfair and losing a child changes our lives forever.

Life is short and one day we will all see our children again. In the meantime, try to find peace in this new normal life!