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Yadairaisabel

These past few days Ive been working on getting our son signed up for school. Usually I dont have a problem with telling people my hubby passed away but for some reason its hard to tell people my kids father passed away. So anyway I got all the paper work done and one of the papers asked for a father's signature. As soon as I saw that I immediately knew someone at this school was going to ask. I went ahead and completed the paper work and went this morning to turn it in. As the lady went over the paper work she tells me, well it seems you have everything ohhh wait his dad didint sign this paper! so I went ahead and told her his father passed away. She said oh Im sorry then took like a 2 minute break and goes on to telling me. Well hun how do you think your son is going to feel when he sees the other dads coming in with their kids? I had no answer to that. It hurts me deeply to think about how he feels and is going to feel for the rest of his life without his dad but it surprises me so much the diffrent reactions people have. Sometimes I wish people simply would just stay quiet!!!!! I dont need the Im sorry and the questions! I just want to be left alone! Its almost like Ive been labeled! Im the young widow with the young kids poor me! well damn I think Im doing pretty good for being where Im at! Sorry Im going on a bit of a venting session but its just some of those reactions that really kick me! I just wish people could see I am suffering and so is my family but I am capable of standing strong and I dont need to be felt pitty for! a simple hug does wonders =)

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What an obnoxious, unthinking idiot that lady was/is (though she has plenty of company). My response might not have been very kind. I'd just dismiss her as a loser and pity HER. But that's me.

Not to minimize your loss in the least but your kids have a great mom and that's more than many can say, so try to keep that in mind (and make sure they do :) ) and hang in there.....and who knows what the future holds, so try not to assume the worst, easy though that is to do in times like this.

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Yadairaisabel

Thank you widower! Its just people like her that can get you down sometimes! but I do feel so much better just talking about it! I bit my tongue with her because I honestly think she is just to ignorant to understand!

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I think her response was totally out of line and completely insensitive, but unfortunately I have learned since my own husband's death that very few people have the empathy to understand how dreadful their comments are. I am glad that you could express yourself here, that will no doubt be helpful to you and your son in the long run. I might also ask the school WHY they ask for the father's signature ... I know this is a minor issue for you, but it seems to that the message is quite prejudicial. maybe they should change that form to something like "parent or guardian"? it really makes me angry when they insist that a parent or guardian be the "father" rather than simply the responsible adult. I might even consider going to the school board, if you have such a thing, and ask them to implement this change. How is it that a mother or a guardian does not have the right to enrol their child in school -- I don't get it! Anyway, I am indeed sorry that you had to go through this, and I hope that attitude of "how do you think your son is going to feel when he sees other dads coming in with their kids?". That is totally out of line for me. Do you have another school as an option for this one? I don't think that this teacher's response shows any understanding or empathy with you or your son. Just fyi, I am a retired college teacher, and if any one our faculty had expressed that kind of attitude to a student or her/his parent, they would have been terminated with cause. Anyway, my heart is with you and I wish the best for you and your son as you struggle with these types of issues.

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I am so sorry this complete idiot did this to you. It makes my blood boil!! I am sure you are very angry with this and rightfully so. One of my son's teachers compared not handing assignments to losing a loved one. Again another complete idiot. My son talked to his teacher and basically let him have it. Pretty sure the teacher realized his mistake. I stewed over it for a few days and then came to the conclusion I couldn't let this go. I called the principal. Yadairaisabal let loose the "angry" widow and complain.

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