Dreams where hubby mad at me

[Sammijo2424]

I have had several dreams lately where my husband has been mad at me. First dream I was at daughter house and I was telling her Ron is not calling me, has been days and days since he called and I told her, I think he wants to leave me. This evening I fell asleep at 7p after a long visit with step son. We talked and talked about hubby and his Dad, I cried a lot, but I started crying at church this morning and have cried pretty much all day. In this dream my husband was away on trip trying to find someone who was missing and presumed dead. I tried to call him for days and he would not answer phone, then one day he finally answered, said he was mad at me, it was my fault he was there, I made him go and he was in a lot of trouble and he was not going to talk to me again until he got home. Then I woke up. Dream is so vivid. So, my husband never went anywhere without me, if he was at work for his 12 hr shift always called me numerous time. The 8th will be 3 months he is gone and May 21st is our 20th anniversary and I find myself feeling more anxious and even more sad than my usual sadness. Anyone have any idea on these dreams and what they mean

[widower2]

Hey SJ, so sorry for the bad dreams. My guess is you're feeling guilty (a common feeling that accompanies grief, near as I can tell) for whatever reason, or perhaps no specific reason at all, and it has manifested itself in your dreams.

Or maybe it's just dreams being the weird random things that they are. They don't always necessarily "mean" anything. I sure hope you don't beat yourself up about it, you have enough to deal with!

[Austykatie]

First of all I am so sorry you are having these dreams, please know that I am praying for peace for you! I lost mine the weekend after yours so I feel like we are almost in the same stage of grief. I know nothing about reading dreams but I can tell you that I am sure your just having a hard time since its the mark of another time... Crying can be good sometimes! I spend some days crying all day and not getting out of bed, others I am able to get up and take the kids to the park and be sociable. Baby steps and take one day at a time! * I am not sure if this has anything to do with your dream but my husband was missing presumed dead but they found him 2 weeks ago yesterday. He was found 9 weeks to the day and almost hour of when his accident happen. Just seemed like I should mention that. Hope you can have a good night tonight! Peace

[Silvergirl61]

sammijo-

I had some similar kind of dreams for awhile, where my dennis was far away, and when I called he told me how angry he was at me, and that it was my fault he wasn't home. I brought them up with my therapist, who told me that dreams like that are a normal part of the grief cycle, and are usually a manifestation of the loved one left behind feeling guilty they are here, or feeling guilty they couldn't stop what happened, etc., and that with time, they will stop. I haven't had one for a few weeks now, so maybe she was right about that. It has been a considerably longer, and sometimes, i can make it through a day or two without feeling so bad, and so terrible at all. I don't know if that helps at all, but my bad dreams stopped after i finally realized that there really wasn't anything more I could have done to change what happened that night. I'm hoping that was what my mind needed, to make them stay gone. Hoping for you, that in the future, all your dreams of him will be the comforting kind. Silver

[IMISSTAO]

Sammijo, I hope things get better for you.

I, too, have had recurring dreams. I have this dream, and ... well, in it, I am laying in bed at night, and I call my husband on the phone, fully knowing he is dead but wanting to hear his voicemail. However, instead, he picks up the phone! I am always sputtering and surprised and saying "Where are you?" and he says, "Duh, I am at work." and I say to him, "How can you be at work? You died!" and he gets mad at me and says, "What are you talking about? I am getting ready for the camping trip!" And then it hits me (in my dream) that I am somehow calling him in the PAST! So I say, "What is the date?" and he says, "March 14th!" And I say, "Oh my God! Don't go camping! Don't go! You will die if you go! Please, Please, Please don't go!" and then the phone gets static and clicks off. And I am freaking out, so I go to turn on the light and I feel a hand on my leg! And I flick on the light and it's HIM!!! Laying next to me in his spot! He's alive and I somehow I saved him!! He looks at me and smiles and says, "Are you having trouble sleeping?" ...

And then I wake up to the nightmare.

I have had this dream several times and I am never immune to it. My therapist says it is my mind trying to bargain. My mind is a big, fat jerk! As much as I like seeing him in my dream, the aftermath of waking up is terribly painful and I hope my mind will move on at some point.

I am wishing you better sleep and peaceful dreams.

[Kenk]

I had a dream similar to yours Imisstao, but fortunately it hasn't been recurring.

I called her phone to hear if she had a voice recording ( I knew her phone was disconnected already and she never ever had a recording). But her evil sister picked up and asked what I was doing calling that number. I explained and she said ok, to call back again. So I did, but there WAS a recording this time. My girlfriend was frustrated and upset, trying to explain something, I'm not sure what. But she was already gone in this dream so it's not like I got to talk to her.

In fact, I've had 3 dreams about her now, maybe 4, and there's only been 1 where she wasn't upset, or acting drunk/strange. I think you're right on about it being our minds playing tricks with whatever emotions we have been having lately.

It'd be nice to have power to control and direct dreams the way we want to though.