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Lost my dad ... feeling alone


ILostMydad

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ILostMydad

Today is 4 months to the day I lost my father. He was my best friend, confidant, supporter, cheerleader and hero. I am still in shock to know he is no longer here to hug, kiss or hear his laugh. I miss that so very much it literally breaks my heart and takes my breath away at times. I do take anxiety meds when needed, and try to press through emotions without them. But I admit, sometimes (especially at night) it’s just too much to deal with. I have been so consumed with cleaning his house out, and prepping it to live in – that now I am in, I find the quiet takes over. I feared that once everything calms down, the emotions would start to surface more. Don’t get me wrong, I cry EVERY DAY and there is not a day that goes by where I feel some level of sadness. Some days more than others. Now, that thing’s are calming down and I am in his house, I thought I would feel more connected to him and I get so sad when I feel disconnected. There have been a slew of things that went wrong with the move and the remodel and I think that anger and aggravation is clouding my sense of connection to him. Also, the neighborhood has changed so much since I lived here with him, so a simple trip to the store triggers memories and the sheer fact of even neighborhood changes. So much change. I am blessed and thankful for he left me his wonderful home, yet I fear I will be stuck in these feelings of loss while I am here as I cannot escape it. I have only been in the house 2 weeks and I hope this shall pass. I would love to give his legacy a try. I know he would be happy that I am here. I am just feeling OFF. Any advice?

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Hi. First of all, I´m so sorry for your loss and wish I could give you some magic advice to make the pain go away, but I believe only time will help us heal. I lost my father 2 weeks ago and after a week had to come back to the house we lived in together and I can tell you nights are always the worse :-( Coming here really helps us, at least we can find solace Reading and sharing our thoughts, emotions and feelings

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