Only child now lost both my parents

[quietman]

Im not coping.... Im 48 and only child with no children and lost my dad last year... I finally sold his house last week and now all I have are boxes. To top it all, my partner is not supportive as I had a relationship with someone else just after my dad died... we reconciled a Xmas but now the relationship is ice cold again. Im on Prozac as I was crying everyday in December (partly the loss of dad, partly the loss of the girlfriend)... but now Im still on the tablets and the tears have returned...

[tiffanycrash]

Quietman...I'm sorry you are not coping well. I too lost both of my parents I'm 32. My dad passed first 10-20-11 an now my mom is gone 3-15-13. Selling his house must have been hard on you. the things left in the boxes is it anything you might want to unpack an keep in your home maybe to feel close to him? My stepdad allowed us to take anything we wanted an my daughter took some of my moms clothes just because they smelled like her. As far are your partner they will never understand what you are going through until they walk that path. My husband had no clue an we were very rocky when my dad passed away. But this time he was much better. As far as your meds maybe you should talk to your doctor about upping your dose. I'm at 40mg of prozac now an I feel I could benefit from an increase. Just hang in there grief is a funny thing. No one grieves in the same way or goes through the same phases at the same time.

[mariemb]

Quietman,

I'm sorry for your painful loss. I know what it feels like to loose all the people who saw you grow up pass away... I truly hope with all my heart you can find a way to get acceptance and peace once again.

I agree with Tiffany, is there anything in the boxes you can either use for your self or at home? I took a couple of my grandfathers sweaters and I wear them when it gets cold, I feel like he's protecting me from the weather hehe... I use my grandmoms house slippers, I feel like she's walking beside me.. and I store in my closet my dad's favorite pair of shorts and polo shirt.

your partner... like Tiffany says, they won't understand until they walk the same path. The three people I mentioned were the ones who raised me since I was born, and they all passed away in a period of 11 months, my dad just 2 weeks ago yesterday. My husband was a flake during my first "good bye", on the second one he was better, and on the third I think he has no idea what to do. I think that it doesn't mean that they don't care or love us any less, they just don't know how to handle things the way we wished they would.

That's why I came looking for a forum like this one, to try and find people that have gone through what I have, to find understanding and get my heart to start rebuilding itself back up again... So I'm glad that you decided to join the forum..

Hope you had a better today.

M.

[Lostwithoutmum]

Quietman, I am very sorry for your loss of your parents, and what you have been experiencing.

Losing a parent is simply devastating, I relate, but you know it is never just that: boxes, your precious memories together, the good laughs you had, your good times. These will never ever fit in any boxes no matter how huge....

I know we act a bit out of character after losing a very close family member - and I must say that your partner must have loved you enough to reconcile. and it is Ok not to be able to show the love you have had ...it takes time to get back to near normal, 'the new normal' - But if your partner loves you (which, from what you said, seems to be the case), she will understand..