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Bad weekend and first solo therapy session


needy

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My family and I were doing so well, and then it started to go down hill on Thursday. My oldest son has a preexisting mental condition and lets just say on Sunday it all came to a head.

Yesterday I went to our first solo therapy session. The therapist told me she wasn't sure how I can keep functioning. More I think about that comment more it bugs me. What am I suppose to do? We start family sessions next week. It suppose to be grief councelling but I think it is all going to turn around at how I suppose to handle my son. Guess we will have to wait and see.

I have another question to ask all of you. On Saturday I tried to go to be without the aid of a sleeping pill. I was laying in bed for hours and couldn't fall asleep and then out of the blue I heard my name being called. I got out of bed and took a sleeping pill. Yesterday I was showing a coworker a picture on my cell phone. I blinked and then saw a picture of my husband. Blinked again and I was gone. I checked my phone and that picture isn't on my phone. Please tell me it is stress doing mind games and I am not losing my mind.

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it is just STRESS. you are going to have times when things are so strange for. I have times when I see my husband and it brings be comfort. I hope that this will bring you comfort as it is for me.

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We tried therapy right after my husband's death. Wasn't the right kind for us - we were all going to the same clinic. Not to be ugly but sometimes the children's counselors focus on the children so much that they forget about you! I had a nervous break down & went to 9 weeks of therapy for just ME. I am a new person now. I had to grieve so I could be there for my kids.

Don't blame yourself if you need a time out for you or just a night away from the kids. Being a single mom within a day's time is hard! Take care if yourself or you won't be able to take care if your children. Hugs...

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The first councelling place I went to was wrong for us. The therapist was right out of school and the receptionist was incredible rude. The one I saw on Monday I clicked with very well, hopefully my children do as well. I would say she is in her sixities. Not sure how the family sessions will work out but I am up to trying. I have had a few friends that told me if the place doesn't feel good move on. I do think we all need individual therapy as well. I am struggling with all of this because if I am not at work I don't get paid. My children are in different high schools as well. Therefore I have to take an extra hour of work off just to go pick them up for the sessions. Right now my work is very supportive which helps.

Hopefully next week works out.

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Needy, I know what it is like to not find the right counselor. If it doesn't feel right, move on; your friends are right about that. That statement she made would've bugged me, too, about how you can keep functioning. I had someone at my kids' school say something similar to me, and it not only bugged me, but it hurt my feelings. I felt like because I was functioning I must not be sad enough. I ruminated on it for a few days until my friend, a true friend, reminded me that because I have small children to feed and pieces to pick up, I must keep functioning, and that no is sad in the same way. I think about my husband all the time, and sometimes I cry, but I am trying to exercise, eat and breathe and do one thing each day to move forward, maybe two, or three if I'm feeling OK that day. I joined a group for myself. My kids are in individual counseling, but I felt like I wanted support from others to help me with questions I don't think just any counselor really can. I don't know if that is an option for you, but I find it infinitely more helpful than one on one with someone whose never lost somebody they deeply loved and relied on. I have gotten some good feedback and suggestions from them on several legal and financial things, too, that I wasn't even aware of.

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