Members sadbeyondwords Posted April 7, 2008 Members Report Share Posted April 7, 2008 does anyone replay the images of their loved ones death over and over again. I cannot stop thinking about this every waking minute. No matter what I am doing, in the back of my mind is the thought of how horribly my mom died. She was so healthy when she went into the hospital- a planned admission that was supposed to take 4 hours for something so minor-it is ridiculous. Then hosptial mistake after freakin hospital mistake led my mother to get terribly, terribly ill. It was so horrifying.- she was joking and laughing when she went to the hosptial-talking about how she wanted to eat pizza when she got out in the afternoon-and she was then in the hospital for an agoniziing 6 weeks due to the freakin moronic sickening doctors. By the end, she was yellow because they gave her a medication that caused her liver to stop working, she stopped making urine, she was on a ventilator. How could this have happened. I am so devastated. She was in so much pain after all this. How could this happen. They were treating her like a guinea pig-they had idiot residents and interns doing procedures on her -they were killing her. How could this happen. she died in so much pain. She was crying while she was intubated and they never gave her pain meds. How?how? HOW? WHY DID THIS HAPPEN TO HER. This has never happened to anyone before. Why her. Why did they do this to her. She was helpless.I remember how she looked right before she took her last breath. She looked frightened. so scared. that image is etched in my mind. I know she was wondering how this could happen. How could it. she was so healthy when she went in. She was not supposed to die. I know that. She did not have medical problems. I am sick to my stomach. How can I ever go on with these horrible images of my poor helpless mother. I will never ever get over this. Why? She suffered so much. I have never seen anything like this before. She was so so scared. They killed my mother. I cant live without her. It has been 8 weeks and I dont want to live without my mommy. I need her so much. I cant believe i will never hear her voice again, see her adorable smile, hug her cute little body-she gave the best hugs ever. So warm. Oh my, what am I going to do. Why bother going on without the love of my life. It feels impossible to move. I cant function at all. I just think non stop about her-why did she suffer. She didnt die a natural death like everyone else does. Why does everyone else have their moms till their 80' sand 90's. I am angry. Why did this happen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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