Recent Loss

[Jovielle]

In lost my beautiful 23 year old son 5 weeks ago today, which was also my birthday.

I no longer know how to feel and don't know how to deal with such a loss

I have expressed no anger as it serves no purpose but I feel desperately empty

Having 2 older sons who have been deeply traumatized by their brothers death it is difficult for me to share my time as I am so consumed

How do we ever move forward and do the knots and sickness in your stomach ever go?

We visit him daily on the way home from work and I fret if I don't vist as I vow he will never be alone

I never imagined my life to take such a tragic turn and dont know how to live anymore

[dsmurph]

The knots will go away. But, the emptiness will probably always be there in some sort of way because a part of you is gone. I know for me, I feel like when our Daughter left, a part of my heart and life also went. I have to learn how to do this life without her. But, we really have no choice, and so we do, everyday. I'm sorry for your loss and that another person has to come to a sight such as this. but, I'm also comforted to find that since the reality is that there are losses, we do have sights like this. I encourage you and your sons to start reading books like Embraced By the Light by Betty J Eadie, to understand where your son is , and that he is at peace and happy. I believe it will bring them a little comfort in this sad time. Just remember, there is no right way or one way to grieve. It will take a long time.

dsmurph

[Ducky]

I wish there was something I could say that would make you feel better. I lost my only son in December 2010. I am sure others on here can help you better than I am able to.

[hotrod]

Dear Jovielle

I am so very sorry to read of the loss of your precious son. It is fortunate that you have found this message board because it is here that I shared my pain, and sorrow and connected with a group of parents who understood as no one else can. They understood and just listened as I mourned, talked endlessly about my pain and the joy that II remembered with my son. I listened to their pain and we shared pictures of special times with our children, I set up a Gallery of photos in the gallery and slowly the pain started to shift. It went deeper and is now a constant companion. With that shift I am able to move forward slowly- always bringing my beautiful son Stephen with me. There is not a day I do not wake thinking of him or a night I go to sleep that I do not think of him. It has been 6 years since he left and I will never be the same. I am recovering and different. I miss him always , He touched my life and my soul forever. I am grateful for his gifts

Please keep coming and sharing It helps

[Ryans Mom]

Im so sorry for your loss of your baby boy. I am also so incredibly sad for you that you had the worst birthday that can be imagined, and will never have a truely happy birthday again.

My "baby" was killed 18 weeks ago today, 4 months tomorrow. He was 24. I was finally able to eat more than one or two bites a day after about 6 weeks. I still cant eat much. (Im old and fat!!! I look like I eat everything in sight) I dont know when the knots and sickness will go away. Somedays are better than others. Some days are worse.

I do have 2 daughters and a step-son and daughter who are all great comforts to me. We all talk about how we are doing since losing the "Baby".

If you need someone to vent to. I am here.

I stopped crying for tonight, so Im feeling strong...

Ruthi