Members ChelseaRaeMiller Posted December 4, 2012 Members Report Share Posted December 4, 2012 I dont talk about my dad. I barely talk to my family anymore. Everything came to blows after my dad died, its not much of a family anymore. My dad died june 30th, 2010.. Exactly 1 month after i graduated high school. He was 60. He went into the hospital a month before i graduated, was diagnosed with liver cancer, that had spread throughout his body. It took him in two months. Although i was trying to finish my last few weeks of my high school career, i still spent most of my time at the hospital. Everyone told me i was too young to watch what was happening but i didn't leave. I stayed, bathed, lived at the hospital. I made a few friends that were also staying for loved ones and with the security guards. I slowly helped my dad more and more ..i fed him, bathed him, brushed his teeth, combed his hair. Until doctors called off the treatments and we sent him to a hospice center. I remember the ambulance transport over. I sat up front cause i couldn't bare to look at him anymore. He passed away the very next night. I don't remember crying. I was confused and in shock. I just left, had a friend pick me up... I didn't go home for weeks. over the next 2 years... Everything started disappearing. Had to get rid of my pets, more family members died, and we just recently lost our home we lived in for 12 years. Ive been in my mom and i's new rental only a few days now. It's never ended. it all replays in my head over and over. When I'm with friends I'm fine, I'm happy. When I'm alone, i cry. And when I'm around family i don't talk much and I'm extremely uncomfortable. None of us see eye to eye anymore. Like today, I've cried all morning. It's been two years and I've cried all morning. How are you supposed to cope knowing you'll never see them again? Ever... They're just gone. How? Cause I'm still expecting him to walk through the door. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members nopeace Posted December 4, 2012 Members Report Share Posted December 4, 2012 There is no explanation on how to cope. We just do in our own way and time. I still cry almost everyday and I lost my Momma 10-09-11 and I visit her gravesite 2+ times a week. Some think I'm crazy where my therapist says it is ok. He lost his wife two years ago and he goes every week as well. Not seeing my Momma again hurts more than I can put into words. I just try and take one breath at a time and PRAY. I have no family or friends. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ChelseaRaeMiller Posted December 4, 2012 Author Members Report Share Posted December 4, 2012 I'm sorry about your mom. I don't think you're crazy, i would probably be the same way but my dad was cremated. I don't pray. I meditate. And yoga and such. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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