Members Mdanielson4 Posted July 27, 2012 Members Report Share Posted July 27, 2012 Till Death do us part. I had a councilor give me a DVD about how marriage is only until death do us part. Am I wrong for not wanting to acknowledge this. I can't just take my ring off and forget about 32 years. Mike Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members dmbarr Posted July 27, 2012 Members Report Share Posted July 27, 2012 Till Death do us part. I had a councilor give me a DVD about how marriage is only until death do us part. Am I wrong for not wanting to acknowledge this. I can't just take my ring off and forget about 32 years. Mike32 years that would had been us in September. I do have my ring off because I broke it shortly after we got married and never did get it fixed. He wanted burried in his but my son wanted it and I asked different people what they thought and everyone thought it was fine to take it off and give it the son, of course hubby don't know if its' on or off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members paulaj Posted July 27, 2012 Members Report Share Posted July 27, 2012 Dear Mdeanielsn4,Most marriage vows mention till death do us part, but they don't say you should bury yourself alive with your loved one. You beloved is always in your heart and I believe they would be the last one to want you to die with them. I wear my wedding ring, engagement ring, his wedding ring and MIT class ring around my neck. Ii gives me comfort. BTW, I'm a licensed therapist, I've never heard of anything like that. Who are you seeing? We were married 30 years and were soul mates.Be Well,Mandala Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Mdanielson4 Posted July 27, 2012 Author Members Report Share Posted July 27, 2012 It was the hospice therapist. I didn't put Mary's ring on when she was buried, I was talking about me wearing mine. I just don't want to take it off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members cant move on Posted July 27, 2012 Members Report Share Posted July 27, 2012 Hi Mdanielson Your angel date says she passed away just over two months ago. Very sorry for your loss. I think it's far too early for moving on to be discussed, but what do I know. I've been shown what may be the same video, and it explains that it's okay to move on, but does not refer to as it being immediately. Don't try to push your grief, let it run it's course naturally. Only you will know when it is time. Until then I see absolutely nothing wrong with you wearing your wedding ring, many never take it off. If you ever do find another partner, and they can't understand that you still love her then she is the wrong partner.You will know if and when it's time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Mdanielson4 Posted July 27, 2012 Author Members Report Share Posted July 27, 2012 I think it just confused me to why they would have me watch that video. I certainly wasn't ready to Evan think about it. Not sure how I could ever move on at this point. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators widower2 Posted July 27, 2012 Moderators Report Share Posted July 27, 2012 I think it just confused me to why they would have me watch that video. "Incompetence" comes to mind. They probably went through some silly "how to counsel people" crash course and now consider themselves qualified. Good grief.I know some of you have had great experiences, but mine with hospice was weak to horrific in most respects. Many of them clueless and shockingly insensitive.As for this:I had a councilor give me a DVD about how marriage is only until death do us part. Am I wrong for not wanting to acknowledge this. I can't just take my ring off and forget about 32 years. I rest my case. No you are not "wrong!" This so-called counselor and the people who made that DVD are in my opinion grossly irresponsible and frankly not very bright. Why SHOULD you take your ring off if you don't want to? Who are they to say that a marriage has "ended" because of this? How obnoxious. I suppose they are trying to say "get on with your life" in their own bungling way, but you can do that while still considering your union with your loved one very much intact. It's not an either/or and frankly none of their bleeping business IMO. Unbelievable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Mdanielson4 Posted July 28, 2012 Author Members Report Share Posted July 28, 2012 I agree, I promised my wife I would only love her more each day as long as I live. I don't see that changing. But as I said in another post tonight. I would give anything for just a moment more with her. I hurt bad tonight. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members josephtmacgregor Posted July 28, 2012 Members Report Share Posted July 28, 2012 In the Catholic tradition, matrimony is a holy agreement made between two people for life into eternity. I'm not at all trying to proselytize here, but I like to take truth wherever I can find it, and that is something I believe to be true. Regardless of your religious persuasions, maybe that can be of some comfort to you. "Til death do us part" on this earth, yes, maybe, but the deep and sacred bond between a man and his wife will extend far beyond the grave. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Mdanielson4 Posted July 28, 2012 Author Members Report Share Posted July 28, 2012 Thank you Joe, that does bring me comfort. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members naty0123 Posted July 30, 2012 Members Report Share Posted July 30, 2012 I havent taken my r ing off and I can not see me doing that for a long time or evan moving his robe and remote off his chair...All his things are where he left them. Our hearts are broken and our dreams with our partners are no longer..I say do what your heart tells u to do!quote name='Mdanielson4' timestamp='1343443935' post='89390']Thank you Joe, that does bring me comfort. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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