Members dmbarr Posted July 21, 2012 Members Report Share Posted July 21, 2012 Its' been a month today and my heart still aches. I was talking to a friend the other day and she said its' not like you can bandage your heart or put anything on it, like you can when something else hurts, and i said no I said i sure wish you could, i said it hurts worse then any pain i have ever had. I went to the cemetery and cleaned it up boy was that hard. One lady I know said she livedat the cemetary when her hubby died, not me I have only been there 3 times, 2 times I had someone with me i could never go by myself every day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ModKonnie Posted July 21, 2012 Members Report Share Posted July 21, 2012 Its' been a month today and my heart still aches. I was talking to a friend the other day and she said its' not like you can bandage your heart or put anything on it, like you can when something else hurts, and i said no I said i sure wish you could, i said it hurts worse then any pain i have ever had. I went to the cemetery and cleaned it up boy was that hard. One lady I know said she livedat the cemetary when her hubby died, not me I have only been there 3 times, 2 times I had someone with me i could never go by myself every day.Gunner's wife,I wish I could say something that would make your pain go away, but we both know it will be a while before the piercing anguish begins to fade a little. The past month has probably felt like a year, but just know that things will begin to be a little brighter in time. Going to the cemetery is so difficult. I personally cannot bring myself to go often to visit my lost loved ones. It just makes me feel worse, while I know others get comfort. We are thinking of you,ModKonnie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators widower2 Posted July 21, 2012 Moderators Report Share Posted July 21, 2012 gw I'm so sorry. The "milestones" are even harder than a so-called regular day, I know. As MK says you're very early in this so give yourself time as also wisely pointed out it's different for everyone; there is no right or wrong, just what works for you as far as going to the cemetery or anything else really. Hold on, day at a time and all. My thoughts and prayers with you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members lreneterry Posted July 23, 2012 Members Report Share Posted July 23, 2012 When I lost my Mom (I was almost 11) I spent a lot of time at the cemetery trying to understand why I hurt so much and felt so empty. I lost my husband just over two years ago. I have been to the cemetery 4 times. We all deal with grief and mourning differently. And differently at different parts of life. You are not wrong or bad for not wanting to spend time there. He is not there. He is in your heart, mind, and soul. Time helps dull the pain most of the time but there will be things that will bring it back fresh and new. Having someone to talk to, to scream at, to babble at, that doesn't judge helps. That is what we are here for. So please continue to post we will listen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members paulaj Posted July 24, 2012 Members Report Share Posted July 24, 2012 gunner'swife,Ouch! One month is a tough time. Five years later, I still can't make up my mind, whether going to the cemetery make me feel better or worse. Even in your pain,.you were one of the few people who reached out to me when I just signed on. All I can do is send a hug. May love and peace surround you.Love,Mandala Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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