One Yr Anniversary = ton of bricks?

[ebp123]

My brother was a victim of a triple homicide 11 months ago. I was rocked initially, then pushed through, all the while never sure what I was supposed to be feeling, if I was dealing with his death in the way I needed to, etc., etc. It'll be 1 year next month and I'm having a harder time now than I did then. His death added to an already stressful life - putting my mother in a nursing home b/c of her Alzheimer's, two small kids, full-time working mom at a nutso job, on the brink of divorce. In the past few days, I feel like I just want to give up. I have full on depression and need to get on meds.

Have others felt the world come down at an anniversary of the death of a loved one? I have to feel this is normal, and I guess we all experience loss in our own way. Just wanting to hear from others. Oh, and I'm new here. I've never really posted on a grief forum before, so forgive me for just diving in.

[ModKonnie]

EllenP,

I am so very sorry about your brother. Yes, especially at the first anniversary point, many people become overwhelmed and re-live the days that lead up to a loss. What you are feeling is common. You may need to talk to a professional about your depression. Sometimes, they have advice that may make medicines unneccesary.

I do know from my own work that exercise helps relieve depression because it actually releases necessary brain chemicals. So, perhaps you could try doing something active? Let us know how that works. Also, self help groups for depression are helpful, as is journaling about your feelings or meditation.

We will be here for you,

ModKonnie