Mother's Day articles on grief

[KayC]

Whether you've lost your mom or wife, even your husband as that would be the person you'd face this day with...
https://www.griefhealingblog.com/2015/05/coping-with-grief-on-mothers-day.html

[KayC]

And this just came in from WYG:
 

It's Mother's Day week, and we know that this can be a difficult time for many. This of course includes those who have lost their mothers, mothers who have lost their children. But also many others who are often overlooked—those unable to have children due to infertility or circumstances, and mothers who have lost partners and miss the celebrations they once had (it turns out, young kids aren't arranging those cards and gifts on their own!). The bereaved spouses and partners who are grieving themselves while supporting their grieving children.

There are also countless people who never had the relationship they desperately wanted with their mothers, mothers and children estranged or separated by conflict, and children whose mothers are living with dementia, addiction, TBIs, or other mental illnesses and are no longer the people they once knew. And mothers whose children are facing similar challenges. There are those separated by the foster system or incarceration, those distanced by travel, those who have lost a mother-figure, and on and on and on.

I share this because grief can be isolating. When we step into the world or onto social media, it might seem like everyone is celebrating a traditional mother-child relationship. We see all the ads and cards and smiling photos posted and families at brunch. The reality is, many people are carrying grief and loss with them this week and always that are hidden behind smiling faces and closed doors. In Gabriel: A Poem, Edward Hirsch, a bereaved father, writes, "Look closely and you will see almost everyone carrying bags of cement on their shoulders. That's why it takes courage to get out of bed in the morning and climb into the day."

Perhaps it's a strange human quirk that there is comfort in knowing we are not alone in our suffering. We might not wish pain on others, yet there is solace in knowing that others are also struggling as we are. So, this is just a gentle reminder, this Mother's Day week and always, that we are never as alone as we might feel. Mother's Day doesn't have to be seen as simply a container for those straightforward mother-child relationships. It can be what we make it and what we need it to be. Sometimes that is a container to sit with, hold, and honor the absence, pain, and loss that so many of us feel.