Writing a book about sibling loss and interested in hearing people's stories

[EssZee]

Hi all,

My sister Libby and I are writing a book about sibling loss. It’s a subject that has been on our minds since January 2017, when our oldest brother, John, died suddenly and unexpectedly. In the earliest stages of grief, we did what we so often do: looked for a book to help us through the unknown. Not finding much aimed specifically at people who have lost a sibling, we resolved to write such a book, because we believe the death of a sibling is a distinct kind of loss that is often minimized. Libby is an LICSW and a hospice social worker, and I am a professional writer.

Through this book, we plan to explore many aspects of losing a sibling, including society’s standard responses, different kinds of loss, the particular–and often fraught–dynamics among siblings and within families, and the unique bond between brothers and sisters. We are speaking with grief experts and family therapists and, most importantly, people like you who know firsthand what it is to experience the death of a sibling; the comments and stories we’re collecting will form the backbone of the book. We've put together a few questions and have been so moved by the responses we've received to date. We are hoping to hear from more people, so if you're interested, please email us at landszobel@gmail.com, or you are welcome to go directly to the questionnaire, which is hosted on SurveyPlanet here.

If you have any questions about the book or how your information might be included, please don’t hesitate to ask. We will be using pseudonyms for all participants; if we are hoping to quote one of your responses in the book, we will contact you directly for approval to do so. We appreciate what a personal and potentially painful exercise this is, and welcome any level of participation that feels comfortable and appropriate.

With thanks and our sincere sympathy for your loss,
Sarah Zobel

[EssZee]

Thanks to those who have responded! I'm sure it feels a little weird sharing such a personal story, but we are not using anyone's real name in this book. Our goal is simply to create an important resource to help people who have experienced what everyone here has: the loss of a sibling. People's stories of their experience--no matter their emotions or relationship with their siblings--will be the most important part. The questionnaire is here. If you have any questions, feel free to contact us at landszobel@gmail.com.

Thanks!