Members Popular Post Narnia68 Posted January 15 Members Popular Post Report Share Posted January 15 I lost my dear, beloved husband on 11/27/23 of a sudden cardiac arrest and I am in such despair and grief that most days I can't get out of bed. I'm so depressed and I can't stop crying. I miss him so much. We did everything together. I just want to hug him and tell him how much I love him. Does it ever get any better? I haven't been eating or taking care of myself. I haven't cleaned my house. I've been avoiding social situations. I just want to stay in bed, even though most nights I lie awake, unable to sleep, missing my husband. Is this a normal stage of grieving? The sadness is unbearable at times. Any advice? 3 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members immortalgypsy Posted January 17 Members Report Share Posted January 17 Hi. I’m Sherry. I lost mine in December to the same. I’ll be honest, if I didn’t have to be at work I’d be the same. It’s been baby steps with the eating. I call showers a major victory. I come home after work and go straight to bed whether I sleep or not. The process is your own. This board is a good start in finding connections. Sending you love. 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Narnia68 Posted January 17 Author Members Report Share Posted January 17 Thank you, immortalgypsy, for your kind reply. Coming to this board has been helping me. The people here are genuine and really understand. I have been trying to take baby steps like getting out of bed, putting on my shoes, and walking down to my mailbox. And my dog needs to be let out and fed and watered. Yesterday I paid some bills. Every tiny thing feels like a huge accomplishment. It's nice to know someone understands. 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Popular Post HisMunchkin Posted January 17 Members Popular Post Report Share Posted January 17 I have anxiety every morning and don't want to get out of bed either. I have to force myself. I also lost my appetite. I'd say this is pretty normal for someone going through grief. I watched a talk by Natasha Josefowitz on youtube called, "Living without someone you can't live without". The part where she mentions that "No one's the center of my life, and I'm not the center of anyone's life", rings very true. I really miss that. I found her speech comforting. I believe she has a book by the same name. Maybe you'd find comfort in her words and advice too? 6 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Narnia68 Posted January 17 Author Members Report Share Posted January 17 HisMunchkin, thank you, I will try to watch that talk by Natasha Josefowitz. It sounds like something I can relate to. I really miss that, too. 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Rey Dominguez Jr Posted January 18 Members Report Share Posted January 18 8 hours ago, HisMunchkin said: The part where she mentions that "No one's the center of my life, and I'm not the center of anyone's life", rings very true. I really miss that. That seems to be the central emotion for me right now, even just going on seven months after Veronica’s passing. Big gaping meteor crater in my life. 😪 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members rlh Posted January 18 Members Report Share Posted January 18 13 hours ago, HisMunchkin said: I watched a talk by Natasha Josefowitz on youtube called, "Living without someone you can't live without". Thank you for this. I'm listening to this now and it resonates hard. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members DWS Posted January 18 Members Report Share Posted January 18 15 hours ago, HisMunchkin said: The part where she mentions that "No one's the center of my life, and I'm not the center of anyone's life", rings very true. I really miss that. 6 hours ago, Rey Dominguez Jr said: That seems to be the central emotion for me right now, even just going on seven months after Veronica’s passing. Big gaping meteor crater in my life. 😪 That really does say it all and then eventually, as acceptance really works its way in, the question becomes "what now". Do we or can we become comfortable not being the centre of someone else's life? It's something that I know I continually wonder...and for years, I wasn't the centre of anyone's life until Tom came along so I do know I can manage that way. But the knowledge that I'm gaining from my grief is that we do need something...another person, an interest or hobby, pets, etc...to help us manage as we wade through this muck that's happened. For me personally, I know it's not another person because Tom still feels like the centre of my life and maybe always will. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Popular Post KayC Posted January 18 Moderators Popular Post Report Share Posted January 18 40 minutes ago, DWS said: Tom still feels like the centre of my life and maybe always will. Definitely, I don't speak of George often any more as most who knew him are now gone, but he's in my heart and thoughts every day. Like you, I miss mattering to someone. 3 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Griefsucks810 Posted January 22 Members Report Share Posted January 22 On 1/15/2024 at 1:02 AM, Narnia68 said: I lost my dear, beloved husband on 11/27/23 of a sudden cardiac arrest and I am in such despair and grief that most days I can't get out of bed. I'm so depressed and I can't stop crying. I miss him so much. We did everything together. I just want to hug him and tell him how much I love him. Does it ever get any better? I haven't been eating or taking care of myself. I haven't cleaned my house. I've been avoiding social situations. I just want to stay in bed, even though most nights I lie awake, unable to sleep, missing my husband. Is this a normal stage of grieving? The sadness is unbearable at times. Any advice? Sorry for the loss of your husband. From what I’ve been reading on online grief forums, it says that things will get better over time. You need to start eating and taking care of yourself cuz it’s only you now. I have problems sleeping which is normal during grief. The advice I can give you is if you have health insurance to get yourself a mental health therapist who you can talk to and a psychiatrist who can prescribe you medication to address the severity of your sadness. Keep reaching out on here and comment to others who share a similar experience to yours. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Griefsucks810 Posted January 22 Members Report Share Posted January 22 On 1/17/2024 at 3:00 PM, Narnia68 said: Thank you, immortalgypsy, for your kind reply. Coming to this board has been helping me. The people here are genuine and really understand. I have been trying to take baby steps like getting out of bed, putting on my shoes, and walking down to my mailbox. And my dog needs to be let out and fed and watered. Yesterday I paid some bills. Every tiny thing feels like a huge accomplishment. It's nice to know someone understands. Hey Narnia68 glad that you find coming to this board has helped you. I also find this board helpful to me. I’m still taking baby steps 4 years out. I’m lucky that I can walk my daughter’s dog while she’s at work during the day. I also have a cat who I adore and love with all of my heart. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Griefsucks810 Posted January 22 Members Report Share Posted January 22 On 1/17/2024 at 3:00 PM, Narnia68 said: Thank you, immortalgypsy, for your kind reply. Coming to this board has been helping me. The people here are genuine and really understand. I have been trying to take baby steps like getting out of bed, putting on my shoes, and walking down to my mailbox. And my dog needs to be let out and fed and watered. Yesterday I paid some bills. Every tiny thing feels like a huge accomplishment. It's nice to know someone understands. Hey Narnia68 glad that you find coming to this board has helped you. I also find this board helpful to me. I’m still taking baby steps 4 years out. I’m lucky that I can walk my daughter’s dog while she’s at work during the day. I also have a cat who I adore and love with all of my heart. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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