Lost My Little Girl

[Sparky1]

So yesterday I brought my dog to the vet and after she got checked out, I decided to have her put down. She was 16 years old and had very bad arthritis but the last few days she couldn't even stand up and would fall to her side like she was dead. The vet said she thought it was something in her neck possibly a tumor or a pinched nerve. She said that because of her age any treatment was just going to prolong her pain and there was no guarantee that she would get better. It was heartbreaking to decide but the vet reassured that it was the right decision. Now I'm left all alone, she gave me comfort these last three years after my wife's passing. I miss her dearly already, looking for her continuously to come beside me or to see her lying on her bed. And to top it off, it was the fourth death on a Saturday, after my dad, mom, and my wife went on a Saturday too. Looks like mine will be on a Saturday too.

 

[KayC]

Oh Sparky, I am so sorry for the loss of your little girl.  After the death of your wife, I know of nothing harder, and with Arlie it felt just like losing my George had only itt didn't affect as many things, but having lived alone with him all those years, it was tough.  All of our habits and routines are tied up with our dog.

I know it's of little consolation that you gave her a good life and it was time...I lost my  25 1/2 year old Kitty 4 1/2 months after losing Arlie and there's just nothing that can prepare us.  My heart goes out to you.

The what ifs blame game happens to most of us going through early grief, it did me when my husband died nearly 18 years ago...it's not that we are guilty of anything but loving them, and the truth is feelings are not facts, but it's that we can't wrap our heads around what happened, and our mind is trying to find some different possible outcome so it searches all the what ifs...

Comfort for Grieving Animal Lovers

 

[Sparky1]

Thank you Kay, I appreciate your kind words. I miss my wife very much and the passing of the dog brings back so many memories. She was in our family her whole life , but I think the dog knew she was close. She would come and lay beside me or rub her head on my leg, and she loved having her head patted and her ears scratched. I will definitely miss her and grieve her too.

[KayC]

I know. It can take a good long while.  I buried Arlie in my backyard, near where George's ashes lay, next to my first granddoggy, Skye, And Kitty on the other side of Arlie.  Several other pets are buried nearby, and each has a tombstone, as does George. My kids call it the family burial plot and I've told them that's where I want my ashes scattered someday.  I painted rocks for Arlie's grave, but it was so hard to lay him to rest.  I went to my son's afterwards for the weekend, and coming home was so hard.  My heart really goes out to you.

[foreverhis]

@Sparky1 I am so very sorry you lost your girl.  💔

Even though you know it was the right thing for her, that last deep act of love means taking the pain on for yourself.  What a treasure you had in each other. Of course you know all too well what it is to grieve and how much it will hurt with her loss so raw and fresh. I wish I could give you a huge hug just to remind you that you are not alone.

It’s scant, if any, comfort right now to think she is at peace, but I believe she is. I have faith she will be waiting for you at the Rainbow Bridge someday when it’s your time and that together you and she will be reunited with your beloved wife. The bonds of love you share cannot be broken by anything.❤️

[Sparky1]

@foreverhis I can't thank you enough for your warm message, it even brought tears to my eyes. Thank you too for being a part of this forum, and making me feel like I'm at home here among all these great people that have helped me with my grief the last couple of years. I'm sure one day we will be reunited with our beloved pets, as well as our loved ones who await us patiently. Grief on top of already existing grief is not an easy burden, but the only thing we can do is inch our way forward and try just to get by. Thank you so much. 🙂

[foreverhis]

14 hours ago, Sparky1 said:

I'm sure one day we will be reunited with our beloved pets, as well as our loved ones who await us patiently.

I've heard it said that time passes in the blink of an eye for those who wait on the other side.  I hope that's true, even though the waiting time seems to pass slowly for those of us still here.

14 hours ago, Sparky1 said:

Grief on top of already existing grief is not an easy burden, but the only thing we can do is inch our way forward and try just to get by. Thank you so much.

I can only imagine how the weight of your grief is heavier now.  You're right that all we can do is wake up each day and get by as best we can. 🤗

[KayC]

How are you doing today Sparky?  Those early days are tough, with all the reminders.  They have no more tears in heaven, so something changes...but I believe she wiill be just as happy to see you again and is with your wife now...

[Sparky1]

7 hours ago, KayC said:

How are you doing today Sparky?  Those early days are tough, with all the reminders.  They have no more tears in heaven, so something changes...but I believe she wiill be just as happy to see you again and is with your wife now...

Hi Kay, I'm not too bad, of course the grief is not the same as the grief for my wife. It does hit me at times when I think, oh, I have to give the dog her food soon, then realize she's not here anymore. Or I'll come home and expect to see her waiting for me by the door and once again, she's not there. I miss her very much, she was there for me through thick and thin, so loyal right to the end. It's not an easy going. Thank you Kay. 🙂

[KayC]

Losing Arlie felt like losing George all over again, not because it brought up those memories but because Arlie was my partner in life, having gotten him 3 1/2 years after George died.  And he was a very special dog, we had a lot of fun together.