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My babie never showed me or gave me a benefit of doubt that he might be cheating on me....he was always having conversations filled with love. We were in LDR so I never got chance to meet the real side of this person.There was love whenever we meet at his house when he was back to home for vacation.he showed me that.up until he died I never had chance to doubt him.moreover he had different face that made me believe in him. I love this man so much that I cannot let any other person trying to come closer to me. It reminds me of him.there was a frnd of mine who was interested in me for very long time. After my partner's demise we got into a situation where we end up kissing,but all I could think about was about my man missing him.how his lipe were and how he use hold me . So, I told my frnd sorry I cannot do this .later he keep on cmng back to me to show me that he cares about me and loves me and want to be a part of my life. I somehow wasn't sure if I could believe in someone again. So I was not completely in and I told him I cannot see him anymore. He kept cmng back to me but I didn't allow myself to fall for him and somehow that turned out to be good for me. This frnd of mine was and is in relationship with my best friend and wanted to leave her.and lied to me all the time that he told her "he loves me" and in reality she didn't even have an idea of him seeing me or atleast talking to me.

I found this out and once again I feel betrayed so badly but grateful that I didn't fall for words.

It sucks every minute that he is not here with me but I do hate how could he played me.

Now, with all trust issues, insecurities it's getting harder every day to live with myself but I m finding strength and trying to focus on positives of my own self.

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You are in my heart and thoughts...I'm glad you didn't fall for the other guy, that wouldn't have helped any.

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