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Is Death the Answer?


mandy832

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It is almost four months since my only child Eric passed away (12/23/2011). Ever since then I fell empty inside and my life doesn't seem to have a meaning. Every morning I used to get up from bed and started making breakfast and lunchpack for Eric. Then I woke him up and brought to kitchen. I enjoyed the look on his face when he saw his favorite pancakes with maple syrup. When I wake up now I have this strong feeling to go to the kitchen and start making pancakes. But then I realize that he's not here anymore. I lost the purpose to live and even if I try to fight it I don't think I'm able to stand it any more. I'm loosing the will to live.. Can someone help me? Is there anyone with same feelings??

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Samantha, First, I am so very very sorry for your loss of your beautiful son Eric. I lost my 28yrs old son Kevin 6 1/2 months ago. I'm sorry for the reason you are here but so glad you found us. I can't fully understand what you are going through, as Kevin was the oldest of my 5 kids. I cannot imagine the heartache you are experincing loosing your only child. I do know it is normal to feel you are lossing you will to go on but we do go on. Through all the hurt and pain we struggle to find our new normal. I've been told we do find it but give yourself time and be kind to yourself. Join us on the Loss of an adult child thread. It is a more active thread and there are others there who, like you, have lost thier only child. Tell us about your Eric when you feel able. Talking helps a great deal. We're here to hear you, cry with you, and support you in any way we can. Hugs and prayers to you. Vivian-Kevin's Mom

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Samantha,

I am so very sorry for the loss of your precious son Eric. We all know the raw pain you are carrying. All of us on the site have experienced the same heartbreak of losing our child. It is 4 years for me now. We are here to listen, and we care. Please come back and tell us about Eric, or anything else you like. Click on the 'Loss of Child' thread, then click on 'loss of adult child.' Even though it says adult child, that does not matter, as everyone is accepted and mainly post on that thread. After clicking there, click on 'reply' at the top right and you may post. On that thread you will find many others who share and understand the pain you are in. In time your pain will ease and you will enjoy life again. You have endured the most horrific experience a parent can face. We all understand and we care.

Love,

Maddy

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Thank you for your help and best wishes. It is so very kind of you to help me, even though we don't know each other. Really thank you. I will try my best to do as you say. I know I need to stay strong.. I was thinking about some virtual memorial. A friend of mine told me about some online memorials where family and friends can join and commemorate Eric. I wanted to ask you if you have any experience with it? It sound really nice but I haven't find some decent page yet, there're some ads everywhere. Eric is so precious to me and I don't want to share our memories just anywhere..

Once again thank you for everything

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davincidanes

I am so, so sorry for your loss. Your kind of pain is felt by many here, and please know that it will become easier to live with. It has only been 3 1/2 months since my son passed, but I'm beginning to accept it and find that "new normal". I regard to online memorials, I'd like to share what I did and offer the suggestion. Sean, as well as the rest of our family and most of our friends used FaceBook a lot to stay in touch. I created a group on Facebood and named it "Sean A DeVincent Facebook Memorial Page", and invited friends and family to join it. In the documents sections I put links to all of his music videos and websites, and in the photos, MANY albums of pictures of and about him from the time that he was a young child. It has become a refuge for family and friend to talk to, about, and share memories of him. Maybe you can do something like this too. Anyone who has a Facebook account can ask to join, and you can automatically add people on your friends list. It is a lifesaver for me. A place where his memory is respected and cherished. If you'd like to visit it to see what I mean, the link is in my signature line. Big hugs and much love to you as you find your way thru this journey of grief. ♥

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