Members jberends Posted March 26, 2012 Members Report Share Posted March 26, 2012 Well, where do I start???? what do i say???I am in the very early stages of grief. having lost my mum only 6wks ago. She died only a week after the 5th anniversary of my dad's death (they had seperated 5yrs prior to him dying) and was completely unexpected. both me and my brothers all arranged to go straight away and help our step-father. within only a few days we had arranged the crematorium and that happened the following friday. the following few weeks i seemed to be staying strong and dealing with things. Wasn't so.16th March was a memorial service for everybody that knew my mum (the crematorium was only closest family and friends). 17th March would of been my dad's birthday and to top it off, Sunday was Mothers Day. Since then I have been a complete wreck. I will be walking down the street or sat in work and suddenly start crying. My sleeping pattern is shot to peices. When i do wake I can't bear the thought of getting up. I have to force myself to.After Losing my dad it took 2years for the grief to show itself. this time it's almost instantly and feels 100x worse. I know that it wont be sorted over night but anyone who reads this and wishes to post a reply, i would love to hear ways in which you learnt to deal with the pain or channel things in a positive way. Finally, I would just like to thank you for taking time to read this and if you reply Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Daffodilfun Posted March 26, 2012 Members Report Share Posted March 26, 2012 Your feelings are my feelings. Getting up in the morning is very hard for me. But I will suddenly start to remember the time of my mom's death and, all that surrounds that time, and I have to get up. I have a wonderful dog that gets me up, so that helps. I cry at a drop of a hat. I don't know how to get over this also. It seems to me that life is not fair anymore and I would just like to leave this planet and be with mom again. Of course I can't go...I have my precious dog. I can't tell you how to deal with it. It will take a long time. What I say to myself is, "what would my mom want me to be doing right now". Hope this helps. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Mrssumr Posted March 27, 2012 Members Report Share Posted March 27, 2012 So sorry for your loss. I lost my Mom 10 weeks ago and am also in the early stages of grief. She was my everything we were best friends she was an amazing Mom and grandmother to my children. I really don't have any great words of advice I just wanted you to know your not alone. My dad and my siblings and I take a moment every Friday at 3:00 ( day and time of my Mom's death) to talk to her and pray. No matter where we are we all do this. I am not sure if this may help you but my dad and I mentioned this to our grief support group who all found it helpful. It's nice to know we all put my Mom above anything else at that day and time. I think of my mom all the time and I cry each and every day. I try to think that I am thankful my Mom did not have to suffer. All of us left behind are the one's who are suffering now but I would not have that any other way. Allow yourself to grieve and be kind to yourself. HUGS! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members debbie8800 Posted March 27, 2012 Members Report Share Posted March 27, 2012 Hi J: I am so sorry for your loss, my mom is gone 4.5 months now. It was such a shock, nice lady from scotland is gone from me i can't believe it. Im left alone without her. You are going to feel a range of emotionals. I was a wreck for about 6 weeks, then it gets a bit better but i still miss her terrible. She was my best friend.Keep posting here and we will be here to listen.Praying for you for peace, acceptence, strength and persiverence. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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