Loss of my beloved sister

[oopsydaisy]

Sorry, this is so new to me. Please forgive me if I started rambling on and on. My sis just past away few days ago. She was like my other half, I can't cope with it at all, especially the way it happened. It was such a freak accident!!! She was found drown in the bathtub by everyone in my family. She had a severe case of fibromyalgia and needed to take hot bath to ease her pain. That tragic morning, I was upstairs in my room. My mom told me everything looked as usual. My sis took her breakfast and played with my little niece, then she went to take a bath. Later, My mom wanted to get something from the bathroom, my sis replied that she is taking a bath. She didn't like to be bothered when she was taking a bath. We all had arguments with her about how long she took her bath. Then, 10-15 min later, my mom went to see if she could go in, but this time my sis didn't make any sound. My mom started panicking and pounding on the door screaming my sis' name, then my sis-in-law joined her. I heard it and ran downstairs immediately. I told my mom to get the key, but I couldn't get it open rightaway. My big bro tried to kick down the door with no success. We finally managed to unlock the door in maybe 3 min, but it felt like 3 hours. When we opened the door, what I saw I will never forget for the rest of my life. My sis was floating side way in the bathtub. My bro dragged her out immediately and I saw that her lips turned blue already. I immediately started mouth-to-mouth resuscitation even though I had never learn it. I asked my dad to press down her chest. When I was blowing air into her mouth, all I could hear was gurgling sound coming out of her nose. She had no response. I asked my dad and bro to continue. I called 911 and asked them to come immediately. My parents were screaming and crying at the same time. But, I had faith that she could be saved. Not long after, an officer came in, he helped me continued with CPR. He pushed her chest and I kept on doing the mouth-to-mouth resusciation. But, still nothing. Then, a team of paramedics came, they worked on her for maybe 20 min, and I was so calm and collective and able to explain the officer of what happend. Because I felt she would definitely come back to us. Then suddenly, I heard my bro crying because one of the parmedics asked him if we would like a chaplain. At that time, I still couldn't belive that she was gone. They said they were taking her to the hospital. I asked them if she still had a chance. And they told me that there is always a chance. So, once again I regain my faith. I went to the hospital with my bro. The minute we walked in, they sent us to sit in a room and I knew I'm starting to live in a nightmare that will never wake up. The doctor and nurses all came in and started saying sorry. I broke down. I couldn't take it. I was devastated and went a little hysterial. It's not true! No way! This is not happening. No one die in a freak accident like this. My sis was an adult. How could she drown in a bathtub? We all try to stay strong for each other. But, at night, I know my parents cried, I cried even harder. My sis-in-law tried to stay strong because she is 7m pregnant. But, today, my little niece out of no where started crying for her little Auntie. We all cried and my sis-in-law totally broke down. All her strength seemed to evaporated. We all feel like we can still seee my sis everywhere in the house, eating with us, watching tv, playing with my niece, especially arguing with me. I just can't accept that she is gone just like that. I know she still have strong desire to live. She loved her little niece so dearly. She promised to our niece to play snow next week. She was so excited about the impending birth of our nephew. She and I made plans to do all sorts of things of him. OMG, how could she just leave like that, without even a word? How are we going to cope with this. The whole tragedy is just so awful and sudden. I don't have many friends, and I don't want to burden them with the pain that they don't understand. This is the only outlet I can find on the internet. So, I have to talk to someone. I had been taking care of my sis for the last 10 years. We had a long history together. We were like 2 peas in a pod, couldn't live without each other. I promised her that I'll take care of her forever. But, now she is gone and I don't even have the chance to take care of her again. When does this pain ever going to stop. Please tell me. If she got sick or die in the traffic accident, I think I can manage to slowly accept it. But, she died in a freaking bathtub! Why? We love her so very much, how could she been taken away from us just like this. WHY? Please help me. Please.......Please.......Please......

[oopsydaisy]

Watching and reading about what happened to Whitney Houston, I couldn't stop thinking about what happened to my beautiful little sister. It's been almost a month since she left us. Everytime the news is on today, it's like we relive that nightmare again. My mom couldn't bear watching the news now. We are all in so much pain. But, I personally couldn't stop questioning why? Even though my sister had health issues, she was not abusing her medications. Before she took the bath, she was having breakfast, chatting with my family and playing with my little niece. Everything seemed so normal that morning, but our life changed forever in just 30 minutes. Sometimes, I really want to know why she left us. Did she slip and couldn't get up physically? Did the doctor prescribe the right medications? Did she take the right medications? Did she suffer? Was she in pain? Did she call out for help and we didn't hear? But sometimes, I just don't want to know anything and only want her to rest in peace. When I couldn't bear the pain, I kept on telling myself that she is still with me in spirit. I know I have to be strong for my parents, but it is so very hard. I just miss my sister so very much.

[Kenn]

I'm so sorry for what you are experiencing with the loss of your sister. Sometimes things like this happen and there is no reason to it. I lost my daughter in July and it has been terribly hard for me too. Learning to forgive myself for not being able to save her, keep her from dying, has been the hardest I guess. We are not God, and we couldn't know that it was going to happen, or what to do to prevent it. The pain of sudden death seems to be equally hard for almost everyone who experiences the loss of someone they love. At first it felt like I would never be able to smile again, but time is a great healer, and I have finally learned to smile again. I pray for you and your family to be comforted, and help you in the days ahead.

Watching and reading about what happened to Whitney Houston, I couldn't stop thinking about what happened to my beautiful little sister. It's been almost a month since she left us. Everytime the news is on today, it's like we relive that nightmare again. My mom couldn't bear watching the news now. We are all in so much pain. But, I personally couldn't stop questioning why? Even though my sister had health issues, she was not abusing her medications. Before she took the bath, she was having breakfast, chatting with my family and playing with my little niece. Everything seemed so normal that morning, but our life changed forever in just 30 minutes. Sometimes, I really want to know why she left us. Did she slip and couldn't get up physically? Did the doctor prescribe the right medications? Did she take the right medications? Did she suffer? Was she in pain? Did she call out for help and we didn't hear? But sometimes, I just don't want to know anything and only want her to rest in peace. When I couldn't bear the pain, I kept on telling myself that she is still with me in spirit. I know I have to be strong for my parents, but it is so very hard. I just miss my sister so very much.

[vivkib]

Sorry, this is so new to me. Please forgive me if I started rambling on and on. My sis just past away few days ago. She was like my other half, I can't cope with it at all, especially the way it happened. It was such a freak accident!!! She was found drown in the bathtub by everyone in my family. She had a severe case of fibromyalgia and needed to take hot bath to ease her pain. That tragic morning, I was upstairs in my room. My mom told me everything looked as usual. My sis took her breakfast and played with my little niece, then she went to take a bath. Later, My mom wanted to get something from the bathroom, my sis replied that she is taking a bath. She didn't like to be bothered when she was taking a bath. We all had arguments with her about how long she took her bath. Then, 10-15 min later, my mom went to see if she could go in, but this time my sis didn't make any sound. My mom started panicking and pounding on the door screaming my sis' name, then my sis-in-law joined her. I heard it and ran downstairs immediately. I told my mom to get the key, but I couldn't get it open rightaway. My big bro tried to kick down the door with no success. We finally managed to unlock the door in maybe 3 min, but it felt like 3 hours. When we opened the door, what I saw I will never forget for the rest of my life. My sis was floating side way in the bathtub. My bro dragged her out immediately and I saw that her lips turned blue already. I immediately started mouth-to-mouth resuscitation even though I had never learn it. I asked my dad to press down her chest. When I was blowing air into her mouth, all I could hear was gurgling sound coming out of her nose. She had no response. I asked my dad and bro to continue. I called 911 and asked them to come immediately. My parents were screaming and crying at the same time. But, I had faith that she could be saved. Not long after, an officer came in, he helped me continued with CPR. He pushed her chest and I kept on doing the mouth-to-mouth resusciation. But, still nothing. Then, a team of paramedics came, they worked on her for maybe 20 min, and I was so calm and collective and able to explain the officer of what happend. Because I felt she would definitely come back to us. Then suddenly, I heard my bro crying because one of the parmedics asked him if we would like a chaplain. At that time, I still couldn't belive that she was gone. They said they were taking her to the hospital. I asked them if she still had a chance. And they told me that there is always a chance. So, once again I regain my faith. I went to the hospital with my bro. The minute we walked in, they sent us to sit in a room and I knew I'm starting to live in a nightmare that will never wake up. The doctor and nurses all came in and started saying sorry. I broke down. I couldn't take it. I was devastated and went a little hysterial. It's not true! No way! This is not happening. No one die in a freak accident like this. My sis was an adult. How could she drown in a bathtub? We all try to stay strong for each other. But, at night, I know my parents cried, I cried even harder. My sis-in-law tried to stay strong because she is 7m pregnant. But, today, my little niece out of no where started crying for her little Auntie. We all cried and my sis-in-law totally broke down. All her strength seemed to evaporated. We all feel like we can still seee my sis everywhere in the house, eating with us, watching tv, playing with my niece, especially arguing with me. I just can't accept that she is gone just like that. I know she still have strong desire to live. She loved her little niece so dearly. She promised to our niece to play snow next week. She was so excited about the impending birth of our nephew. She and I made plans to do all sorts of things of him. OMG, how could she just leave like that, without even a word? How are we going to cope with this. The whole tragedy is just so awful and sudden. I don't have many friends, and I don't want to burden them with the pain that they don't understand. This is the only outlet I can find on the internet. So, I have to talk to someone. I had been taking care of my sis for the last 10 years. We had a long history together. We were like 2 peas in a pod, couldn't live without each other. I promised her that I'll take care of her forever. But, now she is gone and I don't even have the chance to take care of her again. When does this pain ever going to stop. Please tell me. If she got sick or die in the traffic accident, I think I can manage to slowly accept it. But, she died in a freaking bathtub! Why? We love her so very much, how could she been taken away from us just like this. WHY? Please help me. Please.......Please.......Please......

I am SO sorry for your loss and need to find us, although I'm glad you did find us here. I lost my oldest son Kevin Sept. 27, 2011. It was also a sudden tragic accident. It hurts because it could have been avoided, should have been avoided, but it happened anyway. I have to say the pain, hurt and confusion will always be there. As hard as it is to understand at this time, it will lessen and you will find a smile on your face or a laugh on your lips at times. It will happen more and more as time passes. I never thought I'd have any good days again, but a few have smuck up on me from time to time. You will never forget your sister or get over it, she will always be part of you and your life. I think we just learn a new normal and go with it. I still ask why, but I have also come to know that there are things I will never know. You did your part in taking care of her over the years, you were there for her. I'm sure she knows that and is thankful to you for loving her the way you did. Talking about your sister with your family can be healing. Talk, laugh, and cry together, you all need it. My family still talk like Kevin is still here. He had such a wonderful personality and humor we all miss so much. We keep his spirit alive and with us and I guess at times we even forget that he's really gone. Again, I'm sorry for you loss. Prayers and thoughts are with you. Vivian-Kevin's Mom

[oopsydaisy]

heydaddy and Kevin's Mom, thank you so very much for your comforting words. I'm so sorry for your loss of loved one as well. Hope everyday gets better for all of us. My best friend has been very supportive and understanding about the whole situation. Without her, I would definitely feel worse than I do now. Still, it's strange how few words from strangers like you can be so comforting. I think it's because we all shared and experienced the pain of losing loved ones. It's something that will change your life forever. So, I really appreciate you reaching out to me. I think about my sister all the time and broke down and cried a few times. But, I hope in times, when I think about her, it will be with more fond memories and affection and less sorrow and pains.