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Deana

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I am new here, and not sure if it's the right place or not. I lost my son Jared on Dec 4, 2011. He was 24 years old. He had a motorcylce accident . He was the middle of my 3 sons. I feel like I am coping but have times I need to talk about him or just be sad about him. I do not want to make others always feel so sad around me. I also still have this feeling of disbelief! Does this ever go away. I know he is gone. I have his ashes here with me. But the feeling does not go away no matter what I tell myself. If nothing else, it has helped to just say it somewhere.

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Deana..I am so sorry for your loss. You definitely have come to the right place to share your feelings and talk about Jared. There are many new people that have joined over the past few weeks. You will find that everyone here is at various stages in their grief. However, we are all here to offer support and to help carry each other through this very difficult time. I hope you will feel comfortable in talking about your son and how you are getting along. Both good days and bad. Take care.

Kate

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Deana - I lost my 16 yr old daughter, Shannon, on September 20, 2011. She was killed in a car accident. She died at the scene. Shock and disbelief are part of this journey, especially early on. I am still in shock. It was mentioned to me here that shock often peels away very slowly over time, one layer at a time until the core is exposed. You are still in shock, but over these next few weeks and months, you will begin to experience other aspects of grief. The emotions are strong and will often take you by surprise. It's not uncommon to experience many strong feelings at once or in rapid cycles. I have come to view grief as an entity that has a life of its own. It takes us and does what it wants with us. It hurts us on every level: emotionally, mentally and physically. Be kind to yourself, and allow yourself to grieve for your child. This will be a long and life altering journey, but not one without hope, although it seems hopeless now. Most post in the Loss of Adult Child thread. It is very active, and you will be welcomed there by others who understand exactly where you are and what you are going through. It's a very diverse group of parents who are kind and supportive. Please post there and tell us of your son. Cry, scream, rage.....whatever you need to express....we "get it", we won't judge, and you won't have to worry about bringing us down. We will be there for you as you make your way along this dark path.

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