I lost my best friend a month ago today

[I miss my best friend]

I lost my best friend a month ago today. 

 

He was 19. I had him in my life for over half my life. My life doesn't feel the same anymore. I have two other dogs and I'm staying strong for them but it's so hard. He was always with me due to him having seperation anxiety. He was my co pilot, my front seat of my car just doesn't feel the same anymore. I gave up my social life for him and it was tough. I haven't changed my routine. Mainly because of my other two dogs. I still have the same routine. I have his ashes by my bed and carry a tube of ashes everywhere with me. I have a tree in his memory which is blossoming. Forget me nots which I have grown from seeds which are growing at a rapid rate like the grief I have, growing and blossoming. The reason why I have come to this group as I don't want to cry Infront of my family and friends anymore as I feel like a burden. I am bursting into tears at the most random times. I just want to know will it get better? I am trying to draw him and write about him but it's just so hard. 

 

Thankyou 

[foreverhis]

3 hours ago, I miss my best friend said:

The reason why I have come to this group as I don't want to cry Infront of my family and friends anymore as I feel like a burden. I am bursting into tears at the most random times. I just want to know will it get better?

Welcome.  I'm so sorry you have lost your companion.  No matter how many years we have with them, it's never enough.

You've found a very good place to be, to talk, to read, to question, and yes, to cry.  Many people in your life probably don't understand why you are grieving this way.  We do.  You are not a burden.

There's no simple answer to your question, not really, but I will try.  Yes, it will get better, but the time and way is does is different for everyone.  Your loss is so very raw and new that I'd be surprised if you felt differently from the way you do.  Of course you are crying, sometimes seemingly out of nowhere, because your heart is shattered.  There's no way to sugarcoat it and there's simply no way around the painful journey through deep grief.  But I promise you that with time and the support and comfort of members here, you will start to be able to focus on all the good of those 19 years.  The happy memories, the joy and love you gave each other, and all the adventures that you shared.  Though it may not seem like it now, the unbearable weight of new grief does ease as we figure out ways to make it part, rather than all, of our lives going forward.

We do not "move on" or "get over it."  How could that be possible?  But we do move forward, slowly, bringing our love and our grief with us.  Grief does not stay the same.  It evolves as we take those steps forward.  I'm afraid that's the best answer I can give.  It's been true for me and for many others here.

[KayC]

I am so sorry for your loss.  19 years, that's a lot for a dog...my Arlie died of cancer 3 1/2 years ago, he was 11 1/2.  No matter when it is, it's rough.  They are our best friends.  Nothing like a dog, so loyal and loving, my heart goes out to you.
Yes it gets better with time, but not better in the sense it's ever over with, just doesn't hurt as bad as day one...our routines are broken, seeing his food dish and toys, all of that strikes a chord with us, the memories, it's all tough.  No one can say how long it'll take because everyone's timetable is different.  Hang in there.  Come here anytime...

Comfort for Grieving Animal Lovers