Lost my mom :( I'm 7 months pregnant

[Katie0223]

I'm not sure what to even say here. Just to start off, my name is Katie. I'm 21 years old, I've been married for 3 years and I'm currently 7 months pregnant with my first child.

On October 2nd, 2011 I was at work that evening when I got a call from my brother that my mom and step-dad had been in a motorcycle accident. All we knew was that my step-dads arm was hurt, and my mom was unconscious at the scene. Someone pulled out in front of them on the highway and slammed on they're brakes. My step-dad tried to slow down slowly, but the car completely stopped in front of them, then took off really fast. He hit the hand brakes and my mom was thrown from the bike my step dad lost control and fell off of it.

They Life Flighted her to a hospital about 3 hours away from where I live.

I called someone to come in for me and we drove up that night. I was so scared the entire way. Trying not to stress to much for the baby, but I kept getting updates from my brother and sisters and it was so scary. They had to drill a hole in her head to release fluid because her brain was swelling. but they weren't telling us much about her outlook...

When I got there my aunt took me aside and talked to me before I went to see my mom. She said it was really really bad.. .like whatever I was imagining.. it was worse, and she just wanted to prepare me before I saw her.

I started balling the second I saw her : ( I've never seen anything like it before. It was so hard to believe that it was my moms beautiful face behind all the bruises and cuts. Her head was swollen and her eyes were completely black. Her brain was swelling and bleeding so much that her eyes, nose, and ears were bleeding :'( I stood next to her bed for hours squeezing her hand praying to God to wake her up.. but she never did. She never moved. They pronounced her Brain dead the next morning :'(

My step-dad had been on a different floor in the hospital because all he had was a dislocated elbow and a couple cuts and bruises... so he didn't even get to see my mom until the next morning... after they had already pronounced her. He was yelling and crying and saying it was a mistake... It was the hardest thing I've ever had to face in my life. I still can't believe I'll never see her beautiful face again or hug her.. or that she wont be here when I have my first child.

We found out a few days after the accident what the baby is, and it's a girl. I started crying during the Ultrasound and the poor guy was like " aww sweetie, did I do something wrong? .. did you want a boy? " I was crying so hard my husband had to tell him why I was upset. I finally calmed down so I could talk and I told him that my mom wanted a girl so badly, and kept telling me it was one. I just wish she was there so I could tell her and she could tell me " I told you so ". It's been almost 2 months since my life was completely changed forever and it seems like its getting worse. It's like as long as I'm not thinking about it too much, and im keeping myself busy. .. I can get through the day. But as time goes on it's becoming more real that she's gone. I'm only 21. My brothers are 23, and 24 and my little sister is only 19. We have our entire lives ahead of us and we have to live them without her. :'(

Please tell me there will be a day where I can think about her and not cry? this is so unbearable. and being pregnant right now makes it so much worse

My mom was only 42 years old.

[Jeff's Mom]

Oh Katie, I am so very sorry for your loss. The picture you posted of your parents is lovely. Your Mom was a beautiful woman. I wish I had the words to say to give you the comfort you need. What you have experienced is a tremendous shock and you will undoubtedly need a lot of time to process what happened. Life can be so unfair at times. I am so pleased to see that you are going to have a beautiful baby girl! And knowing how much your Mom wanted a grandaughter is something that you will be so happy about when she is born.

I know it is going to be hard to come to grips with her passing. You are going to have to take good care of yourself. It is going to take time for your entire family to slowly gain strength again after this deep loss. One day at a time is about all you can ask of yourself. When the baby comes you will be able to focus on this new life and remember with much love your Mom. In time you will be able to move forward without as much ache in your heart. It will take time but your Mom would want you to keep on. And that goes for your siblings as well. I hope your Dad is improving and with the support of all of you he will manage to carry on. (HUGS)

Kate

[Guest DarkHeart]

I'm not sure what to even say here. Just to start off, my name is Katie. I'm 21 years old, I've been married for 3 years and I'm currently 7 months pregnant with my first child.

On October 2nd, 2011 I was at work that evening when I got a call from my brother that my mom and step-dad had been in a motorcycle accident. All we knew was that my step-dads arm was hurt, and my mom was unconscious at the scene. Someone pulled out in front of them on the highway and slammed on they're brakes. My step-dad tried to slow down slowly, but the car completely stopped in front of them, then took off really fast. He hit the hand brakes and my mom was thrown from the bike my step dad lost control and fell off of it.

They Life Flighted her to a hospital about 3 hours away from where I live.

I called someone to come in for me and we drove up that night. I was so scared the entire way. Trying not to stress to much for the baby, but I kept getting updates from my brother and sisters and it was so scary. They had to drill a hole in her head to release fluid because her brain was swelling. but they weren't telling us much about her outlook...

When I got there my aunt took me aside and talked to me before I went to see my mom. She said it was really really bad.. .like whatever I was imagining.. it was worse, and she just wanted to prepare me before I saw her.

I started balling the second I saw her : ( I've never seen anything like it before. It was so hard to believe that it was my moms beautiful face behind all the bruises and cuts. Her head was swollen and her eyes were completely black. Her brain was swelling and bleeding so much that her eyes, nose, and ears were bleeding :'( I stood next to her bed for hours squeezing her hand praying to God to wake her up.. but she never did. She never moved. They pronounced her Brain dead the next morning :'(

My step-dad had been on a different floor in the hospital because all he had was a dislocated elbow and a couple cuts and bruises... so he didn't even get to see my mom until the next morning... after they had already pronounced her. He was yelling and crying and saying it was a mistake... It was the hardest thing I've ever had to face in my life. I still can't believe I'll never see her beautiful face again or hug her.. or that she wont be here when I have my first child.

We found out a few days after the accident what the baby is, and it's a girl. I started crying during the Ultrasound and the poor guy was like " aww sweetie, did I do something wrong? .. did you want a boy? " I was crying so hard my husband had to tell him why I was upset. I finally calmed down so I could talk and I told him that my mom wanted a girl so badly, and kept telling me it was one. I just wish she was there so I could tell her and she could tell me " I told you so ". It's been almost 2 months since my life was completely changed forever and it seems like its getting worse. It's like as long as I'm not thinking about it too much, and im keeping myself busy. .. I can get through the day. But as time goes on it's becoming more real that she's gone. I'm only 21. My brothers are 23, and 24 and my little sister is only 19. We have our entire lives ahead of us and we have to live them without her. :'(

Please tell me there will be a day where I can think about her and not cry? this is so unbearable. and being pregnant right now makes it so much worse

My mom was only 42 years old.

Hi Katie, I am so very sorry for your loss =( and the fact that you are pregnant with your first child having to face this tragedy seems so unfair. I wish I had all the right words to comfort you, but I know I don't. Still, I wanted to say that I believe that the day will come when you can think about your beloved mom and not cry ~ of course that day will come. By your post, I get the feeling that you are naturally a very strong-spirited person; to me, that's half your battle won already. As far as being pregnant, make sure you remember (and remind yourself & others) that your body chemistry is totally whacko right now. Estrogen will wreak havoc with your emotions and moods, so make sure you keep in close touch with your OB/GYN and related doctors; make sure they fully understand that your situation has been compounded by the tragic & sudden loss of your mom. I can only try to imaging how tough this situation must be for you, but once you get through the worst part of the pain, you will be even stronger than you are now, and you will continue to strengthen every day. You are not alone, Katie. Please don't forget that. You take care of yourself and that gorgeous little girl ~ time heals.