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tumn

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I just lost my baby. It is so hard to cole. I don't know what to do. I just cry all day and lay down on my bed. I even lost the motivation to move. It is so hard without him here. We were able to spend just 3 months with him. It is very hard. 

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His name is toffee. He was very active a few days ago but then, he started not eating anything, vomiting, not sleeping for 24 hours. It was too late before we were able to go to the vet. He's just 6 months old :((

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I am so sorry, who knows what was failing, maybe kidneys, nothing could have been done had you known sooner.  It's so unusual so young.  I'd give anything to bring him back.  :(

 

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40 minutes ago, KayC said:

 

It is so hard for me. I lost 2 of my fur babies this year. We were just able to spend time with toffee for 3 months. Everything reminds me of him. I am really having a hard time :((

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I am filled with guilt and questions. If only i have been hours earlier and if only if I have always guard him and all. It is so hard for me. It's been days and I don't have the will to move 

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OH my gosh, we are ALL filled with "if onlys" in the early time! 

The what ifs blame game happens to most of us going through early grief, it did me when my husband died over 17 years ago...it's not that we are guilty of anything but loving them, and the truth is feelings are not facts, but it's that we can't wrap our heads around what happened, and our mind is trying to find some different possible outcome so it searches all the what ifs...
I did this also when my soulmate in a dog, Arlie, died.  I cooked for him with his lifelong Colitis (not easy for a 140 lb. dog!)...WHAT IF I hadn't fed him brown rice with his meat and vegetables!  I had no idea he'd get cancer nor did I realize until a few months after he died that rice contributes to it.  On the other hand, had I not, could I have controlled his Colitis without it for 11 years?  We don't know what we don't know until we do, and cannot berate ourselves continually for what we did not know.  :(

 

A Dangerous Villain: Guilt
Breaking the Power of Guilt
A Dangerous Villain: Guilt
http://www.pet-loss.net/guilt.shtml
http://www.griefhealing.com/article-loss-and-the-burden-of-guilt.htm
https://www.griefhealingblog.com/2019/08/pet-loss-when-guilt-overshadows-grief.html
https://www.griefhealingblog.com/2017/07/pet-loss-when-guilt-goes-unresolved.html

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