Self Motivation?

[BohoKat]

I sympathize with the many of you that can barely drag yourself to work, or can get to work for the distraction but don’t know what to do when you get home. Unstructured time is proving to be a problem for me and I lack the self motivation to complete important tasks I formerly had.

I am a self-employed writer. I am having problems working on paying projects, much less the marketing of my first novel and writing my second (both of which were fully active but came to a dead stop over a year ago when my husband passed).

I have always done technical writing but my dear husband was my main cheerleader on creative projects. I never thought I could do it, but his belief in me was complete. What I wouldn’t give to hear for the umpteenth time, his cheerful “it’s the Great American novel,” or jokes about the sailboat he was going to buy when I hit the best seller list. Just one more aspect of how I still feel how impossible this life without him is.

I am completely discouraged. Appreciate any and all input.

Peace, BohoKat 

[Ronni_W]

BohoKat,

I haven't turned off my 'private chat' function -- so please do feel free to 'PM' me, if you have a sense that I may be able to offer some kind of support, even if 'offline' from this site. (Not guaranteeing that I'll see it as the next "Great American novel"...but I do recognize that type of support that I received for my own books to be published, that I was working on. Similar but not the same. Not a sailboat, but one of those 'waterfall walls', that he was going to be able to be behind 'incognito' while he kept a close eye on the entire organization, in our suite of offices, after I hit the best seller list.)

Hell's bells. It sucks, huh?  (Um. Okay, so I fully see that this wasn't terribly great "cheerleading", now was it? <LOL>. But, I'm pretty sure that I'll be able to do better...at least on some days.)

Love'n hugs, BohoKat, and all of the best that this Cosmos has to offer.   Ronni

[Jemiga70]

@BohoKat  I too have done technical and creative writing.  My current job involves editing, which for whatever reason I don't find too much a cognitive strain, so luckily I'm able to keep working. All my personal projects have sat on the sidelines for 17 months. I expect they'll sit there longer and that's OK.  Self-motivation? For me there's none -- or little. Like you said, it's enough just to get through a work day.  At the best of times unstructured time can be challenging.  Writing well and being creative on demand is not easy, at least for me, even when I was firing on all cylinders.  Never mind marketing and self promotion, which are fueled by self confidence. Grief saps that. Of course we're not feeling motivated right now.  I'm sorry you're feeling so discouraged and missing your number one cheerleader. I have my own version of that. It's difficult.  I wish none of us were in this spot.  Be kind to yourself.  We have to patient and kind with ourselves and not expect too much of ourselves. Grief bleeds into every facet of life it seems. Please take care,

[KayC]

12 hours ago, BohoKat said:

What I wouldn’t give to hear for the umpteenth time, his cheerful “it’s the Great American novel,” or jokes about the sailboat he was going to buy when I hit the best seller list.

Listen for his voice to come through to you in your mind and heart...I often replay George's words to me just when I need them, it helps me to know he is cheering me on, if not in person, then on the sidelines, but always supportive and proud of me.