Mother Passed feel completely lost

[AlanMichael]

My mother passed on the 28th. I feel so lost. She was my best friend and biggest supporter. Always trying to help me and give me advice on life. She was a new grandmother to my 4month old. I feel so lost and lonely. My sister died when I was 9 and I’m 28 now. Just me and my dad now. Everyday I wake up she is on my mind. And I have to go through another day without her. 

[MrX]

I saw your post, and I wanted to say how sorry I am for your loss. My Father passed a few weeks ago.

I wanted to let you know that there are a lot of us out here, that care and I hope you keep seeking support for your grief.

There is no set time when you will be over the grieving process. Everyone grieves differently.

I posted things that I have done, in one of the "circles" here on the site that has helped me. But again, everyone is different:

I can tell you that I feel a more like myself, if that makes sense.. and while I sure miss my father. I hope some of what I posted helps.
Please do take care of yourself... self-care is so important.

[Lindsaydawn]

Hey, I’m feeling that same way, except I lost my mother 2 years ago and it still feels like it happend last week.  Every single day almost all day I think of her and cannot stop.  My mom was also my best friend and biggest supporter.  She was the only one who genuinely cared and loved me.  It feels like a twilight zone or super unrealistic not having her here anymore

[AlanMichael]

5 minutes ago, MrX said:

I saw your post, and I wanted to say how sorry I am for your loss. My Father passed a few weeks ago.

I wanted to let you know that there are a lot of us out here, that care and I hope you keep seeking support for your grief.

There is no set time when you will be over the grieving process. Everyone grieves differently.

I posted things that I have done, in one of the "circles" here on the site that has helped me. But again, everyone is different:

I can tell you that I feel a more like myself, if that makes sense.. and while I sure miss my father. I hope some of what I posted helps.
Please do take care of yourself... self-care is so important.

Thanks so much I’ll deff check that out

[AlanMichael]

5 minutes ago, Lindsaydawn said:

Hey, I’m feeling that same way, except I lost my mother 2 years ago and it still feels like it happend last week.  Every single day almost all day I think of her and cannot stop.  My mom was also my best friend and biggest supporter.  She was the only one who genuinely cared and loved me.  It feels like a twilight zone or super unrealistic not having her here anymore

Yeah that’s what I’ve explained to some people that it feels like a weird alternative reality almost like I’m in a dream or something. Does not feel real at all. 

Just now, AlanMichael said:

Yeah that’s what I’ve explained to some people that it feels like a weird alternative reality almost like I’m in a dream or something. Does not feel real at all. 

I’m sorry for your loss as well I know it’s hard. My mother never feared death she believe we all go somewhere else after death and being on earth is just a part of the journey. She was very strong. She actually pulled her own ventilator tube out at her lowest. We all took that as a sign she was ready to leave. 

5 minutes ago, AlanMichael said:

Thanks so much I’ll deff check that out

Sorry to hear about your father. If you ever want to talk I’m here.

[Briannaw23]

Hi, I’m sorry for your lost I also lost my mom on the 28th of January. And still can’t believe it I know how you feel and you are not alone. Through my grieving I think of the happy moments with my mom and knows she’s in a better place and happy with god and my other loved ones. I know your mom watching over you and your family.

[AlanMichael]

9 minutes ago, Briannaw23 said:

Hi, I’m sorry for your lost I also lost my mom on the 28th of January. And still can’t believe it I know how you feel and you are not alone. Through my grieving I think of the happy moments with my mom and knows she’s in a better place and happy with god and my other loved ones. I know your mom watching over you and your family.

Im sorry for your loss as well. It feels so unreal can’t even describe it. Today wasn’t a good day for me. Did ok you until this evening…we used to talk everyday my best friend not I just feel so empty and confused. I’m here if you ever need to talk

[ADM925]

On 2/12/2022 at 6:10 AM, AlanMichael said:

I feel so lost. She was my best friend and biggest supporter. Always trying to help me and give me advice on life.

I am very sorry to hear this and feel the same way.  Although I was never very successful in life Mom understood my nervousness and depression and always had unconditional love for me.  It is very frightening to be here without her and it gets worse every day.

On 2/12/2022 at 6:10 AM, AlanMichael said:

Everyday I wake up she is on my mind. And I have to go through another day without her. 

I say of each dreaded sunrise "now begins another day alone in Hell" because it was just the two of us for the last 21 years.  And also say "I can't take this anymore".

On 2/12/2022 at 10:46 AM, Lindsaydawn said:

Every single day almost all day I think of her and cannot stop.  My mom was also my best friend and biggest supporter.  She was the only one who genuinely cared and loved me.

7 months and it is worse every day.  How could it not be, since my worst nightmare since being a 5-year-old boy with extreme separation anxiety is now a permanent state, including when asleep (with flashbacks, heart-breaking dreams that Mom is healthy and back with me, and also terrible nightmares of trying to find her in vast, dark, empty buildings at night)? 

On 2/12/2022 at 10:46 AM, Lindsaydawn said:

It feels like a twilight zone or super unrealistic not having her here anymore

I feel like I'm living in "A Stop at Willoughby" but with a different cause for life being a nightmare.  Or like an alien stranded on another planet.  Even if it's being with people or at places we've known for years it's very disconcerting and unnerving.  I feel almost outside of myself, not belonging or wanting to be there at all and desperately wanting out even though being alone in the empty house is very bad also.

1 hour ago, Briannaw23 said:

Through my grieving I think of the happy moments with my mom and know she’s in a better place and happy with god and my other loved ones

I firmly believe this as you do and probably wouldn't be here now if I didn't.  But even this great hope and consolation can't fully overcome my horror of the prolonged separation and dread of the future and of being only with people who are not my mom.  "I don't want to be here with them.  I want to be with you."

[Traz]

On 2/12/2022 at 10:46 AM, Lindsaydawn said:

Hey, I’m feeling that same way, except I lost my mother 2 years ago and it still feels like it happend last week.  Every single day almost all day I think of her and cannot stop.  My mom was also my best friend and biggest supporter.  She was the only one who genuinely cared and loved me.  It feels like a twilight zone or super unrealistic not having her here anymore

Hi Lindsaydawn,

I lost my mom in Sept 2019 - 6 months before Covid and I do the same thing. My mom is on my mind all day, every single day. The memories bombard me... remembering her voice, her laugh, the things she said two days before she passed, things she said in my childhood - all of those memories and just a lifetime of togetherness that has ended feels too much to bear at times.

[Lost now]

So sorry for your loss. Mother's are the most important person in anyone's life. I can't live without my mom. I hope I reunite with her.