Sadness

[Zee87]

I like coming to this website because I can write all I want without being judged or timed. Last week a girl close to my age was reported missing. The Bosnian community in the city is very close and this was the first time something tragic like this to happen. She was 25, a young woman who had a long life ahead of her. Yesterday, they found her in the river in her car. The pain that her family is going through is unbearable, her mother isn't there to feel the pain because she passed away from cancer two years ago. This even reminds me of the pain that I am going through with the loss of my mother. I just want to hear her voice again and see her smile. I have video of her when she was in the hospital. She wanted to say hi to my sister so she asked me to record her. For a while I watched it constantly but for some reason I can't now. I would do anything to bring my mom back. The pain is so unbearable and I feel it doesn't get better. My mom always made everything better and nowo she's not here.

I started seeing a therapist, Tuesday will be my second session. I am not sure if it is going to help but I guess it's a place where I can share my pain without adding more to the people I love.

[ModKonnie]

I like coming to this website because I can write all I want without being judged or timed. Last week a girl close to my age was reported missing. The Bosnian community in the city is very close and this was the first time something tragic like this to happen. She was 25, a young woman who had a long life ahead of her. Yesterday, they found her in the river in her car. The pain that her family is going through is unbearable, her mother isn't there to feel the pain because she passed away from cancer two years ago. This even reminds me of the pain that I am going through with the loss of my mother. I just want to hear her voice again and see her smile. I have video of her when she was in the hospital. She wanted to say hi to my sister so she asked me to record her. For a while I watched it constantly but for some reason I can't now. I would do anything to bring my mom back. The pain is so unbearable and I feel it doesn't get better. My mom always made everything better and nowo she's not here.

I started seeing a therapist, Tuesday will be my second session. I am not sure if it is going to help but I guess it's a place where I can share my pain without adding more to the people I love.

Hi Zee,

I am glad you are seeing a therapist AND coming here. I know it doesn't help now, but the pain will become more manageable in time.

That is simply awful about the young girl found in the river. It is tough to understand why things happen, and maybe we will never get to.

Please let us now how you are doing. We will be here for you.

ModKonnie

[hurtin1]

I lost my Mom a year ago and my Dad 3 months ago...Recently my mentally handicapped brother took his own life..I am so full of guilt and blame. Ive talked to my friends and they are like "snap back" I am tryng and it is very difficult. I feel the pain daily over and over. I talked with a therapist and she was nice but just smiled and offered no words of anything.

[ModKonnie]

I lost my Mom a year ago and my Dad 3 months ago...Recently my mentally handicapped brother took his own life..I am so full of guilt and blame. Ive talked to my friends and they are like "snap back" I am tryng and it is very difficult. I feel the pain daily over and over. I talked with a therapist and she was nice but just smiled and offered no words of anything.

Hurtin12,

I am so very sorry about your losses. I can't even imagine that your friends think you can simply "snap back" after such profound tragedy and loss. And as far as your therapist, try another one.

Do you have any other family that understands how difficult this is for you? What about a grief support group in your area?Perhaps a leader of a local spiritual community may be able to offer you wisdom and advice.

In the meantime, you may want to start writing out your feelings in a journal and continue to talk to us. We will be here for you.

ModKonnie

[carter19]

Hi Hurtin12

I feel for you so much, I at the moment am just experiencing the grief of losing my father but I cannot even begin to imagine what you are going through currently. I am so sorry that you have to go through all of this.

I know this probably wont help at the moment but try and keep it in the back of your mind until a bit later on. I saw a therapist last year for some issues I was having, I also used to be a person that carried a lot of guilt around with me and to a small degree I still do but, my therapist asked me what I was achieving from feeling guilty? My only reply was - I feel bad, it makes me sad, it brings me down. She replied with..."if the guilt isn't actually achieving or helping anyone then what is the point?"

I have days when I feel guilty about things that happened on the day my father died but then I do try and reason with myself that I am not helping him, me or anyone else. I can't change what happened, it is what it is but it can still hurt and we are allowed to grieve.

Please take care, I hope you don't mind a newbie on these forums offering their support.

Dmc44

[bltarve]

I like coming to this website because I can write all I want without being judged or timed. Last week a girl close to my age was reported missing. The Bosnian community in the city is very close and this was the first time something tragic like this to happen. She was 25, a young woman who had a long life ahead of her. Yesterday, they found her in the river in her car. The pain that her family is going through is unbearable, her mother isn't there to feel the pain because she passed away from cancer two years ago. This even reminds me of the pain that I am going through with the loss of my mother. I just want to hear her voice again and see her smile. I have video of her when she was in the hospital. She wanted to say hi to my sister so she asked me to record her. For a while I watched it constantly but for some reason I can't now. I would do anything to bring my mom back. The pain is so unbearable and I feel it doesn't get better. My mom always made everything better and nowo she's not here.

I started seeing a therapist, Tuesday will be my second session. I am not sure if it is going to help but I guess it's a place where I can share my pain without adding more to the people I love.

I am happy to hear your seeking the help you need, I to lost my mom 10 years ago, I use to watch videos from thanksgiving and just watch her cook I miss the smell of her food, and the light she brought to my life. I carry on her memory through my kids I named my daughter after her since she was her first grand daughter. And my mom loved the moon and I told my kids she will always be there so whenever they wanted to talk to her shes there. It helps little things like that have more meaning to me now. Stay strong you will get through this we are here and talk and let it out.

((HUGS))

Brook