When will I feel like a human again?

[Rage]

Ok, I know that it takes time to feel normalized, but this grieving thing really sucks. My cognitive functioning is well below normal. I do stupid things like wonder where my keys are when I am holding them in my hand, my brain does not function. I still cannot sleep without tons of sleeping pills, and even then I wake up. I'm a total space cadet at work. It's been a few months and no improvement. In fact, my emotional state might even be declining. I hate this.

[ModKonnie]

Ok, I know that it takes time to feel normalized, but this grieving thing really sucks. My cognitive functioning is well below normal. I do stupid things like wonder where my keys are when I am holding them in my hand, my brain does not function. I still cannot sleep without tons of sleeping pills, and even then I wake up. I'm a total space cadet at work. It's been a few months and no improvement. In fact, my emotional state might even be declining. I hate this.

I'd say that on top of your normal routine, the reason your cognitive functioning appears to be abnormal is because you are preoccupied and distracted. The space cadet at work is probably due to the residue from sleeping pills. Do you take prescription pills or over-the-counter? If you take OTC, go get a prescription for stronger ones. The OTCs just don't work as well. I know you hate this--we all do, but you can make it through.

Your emotional state may be declining because of stress, worry, and exhaustion. Are you eating properly? Getting your normal amount of exercise? Drinking enough fluids? Are you drinking alcohol? Are you drinking excessive caffeine? Too much caffeine will leave you tired, frazzled, headachy and unable to sleep at night even with sleep aids.

After the initial shock and numbness wear off, it often appears as though things are worse. It is as difficult adjustment time, but you will be able to work through it. Just keep plodding forward, and try some extra special care of yourself.

ModKonnie

[bltarve]

Ok, I know that it takes time to feel normalized, but this grieving thing really sucks. My cognitive functioning is well below normal. I do stupid things like wonder where my keys are when I am holding them in my hand, my brain does not function. I still cannot sleep without tons of sleeping pills, and even then I wake up. I'm a total space cadet at work. It's been a few months and no improvement. In fact, my emotional state might even be declining. I hate this.

Its hard to feel whole again, my mom passed away 10 years ago, I still have a hard time i done that same thing walk in my room for something and forgot why i am even in there i tried to ignore everything i put it the back of my mind so i could function, well its all coming back up and feels as fresh as it did the day i found out. So make sure to get the help you need and take the time to grive and deal with it.

We are here for you too. Try to get back on a routine even right it down as a to do list, 8am-eat breakfest, 9-shower, 10- walk dog. Things like that retrain yourself to live.

[SadRN]

I agree. I seem to be worse as far as remembering things and being efficient. I'm also a little shaky most of the time. I feel like I'm taking sudafed and I'm not taking anything. I do appear to be sleeping better now that I have my heating blanket back (there is something soothing about that blanket). It's been about a month now and I still cry a lot. I know it takes time, but still is hard. Hang in there.

Ok, I know that it takes time to feel normalized, but this grieving thing really sucks. My cognitive functioning is well below normal. I do stupid things like wonder where my keys are when I am holding them in my hand, my brain does not function. I still cannot sleep without tons of sleeping pills, and even then I wake up. I'm a total space cadet at work. It's been a few months and no improvement. In fact, my emotional state might even be declining. I hate this.

[carter19]

I am at the same stage, forgetting things, not sleeping in a normal pattern and interest in most types of food is zilch. Writing notes is a great idea, I started making 'to do' lists each night so by the next morning I would remember things I had to complete or things I just wanted to do to keep busy. It really helped!

I go shopping and come home with everything else that is just not needed and the one item I really needed is left on the supermarket shelf (now the writing of the list thing doesn't work for me here as I keep losing the list by the time I get to the market!..LOL)

Take care, we all understand what you are going through, always remember you are never alone and just take one day at a time. I also wonder how long things take to start feeling human again but I suppose even though we are all on the same journey, grief is such an individual thing.

Dmc44

[Rage]

Gah! I think I feel even worse now. I find myself going to call her, and realizing that I can't seconds before almost pushing send on my phone. Then I usually cry for hours. I still need her, and I vacillate between sobbing and being angry because I'm still fairly young, and in need of having a mother. Who isn't? Things were pretty complicated, and there are definitely more feelings involved than anger and sadness because she led a heartbreaking life full of regret and substance abuse. I do see a psychologist because her life and death were equally tragic, and traumatic to our family, but I don't really feel the shrink is helping. I don't think anything can help.