Members jdandhope Posted May 16, 2011 Members Report Share Posted May 16, 2011 My beautiful daughter died on 3/10/10 after a 224 day battle with a horrible brain tumor located in her brainstem. Less than 1 in 4 kids will survive 9-12 months, less than 1 in 10 will live up to 3 years. I'm just looking for other Moms to share our stories and maybe help each other as we grieve.Always With Hope in my heartDeb Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ModKonnie Posted May 16, 2011 Members Report Share Posted May 16, 2011 My beautiful daughter died on 3/10/10 after a 224 day battle with a horrible brain tumor located in her brainstem. Less than 1 in 4 kids will survive 9-12 months, less than 1 in 10 will live up to 3 years. I'm just looking for other Moms to share our stories and maybe help each other as we grieve.Always With Hope in my heartDebDeb,I am so sorry about the loss of your precious daughter. There are many other parents here who have lost their beloved children. They will be able to encourage and support you in ways that others who haven't experienced such profound loss can't. We will all be here for you; you've come to the right place. ModKonnie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members westleysmom Posted May 17, 2011 Members Report Share Posted May 17, 2011 Deb-I'm so sorry for your loss of you daughter. My son Westley died in his sleep when he was almost 21 years old. That was last year on January 13. It was sudden and unexpected, he was in perfect health (more or less, he had sleep apnea) . He had a couple of beers and took a prescription painkiller, the combination along with the sleep apnea led to his death. It has been 16 months now, and some days are so bad, its like it just happened, but not every day. Coming here in June of last year at about 5 months helped me so much. Mostly I post on the Loss of adult Child thread, there are lots of parents there that have helped me so much, a couple that lost their child due to brain cancer. There are some who lost really young children, but all are welcome, even if your child wasn't quite an adult (at 20 Westley wasn't quite an adult in many ways, and he still lived at home). So I just want to offer you my sympathy in the loss of your daughter and welcome you to the club nobody wants to be a member of. I hope when you are able you can come and share your daughter and her life and death with others who really understand. Peace and hugs to you from someone who feels the pain of loss of a beloved child. Keep the faith, and keep the hope. Its what we have that we can hold on to. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members jdandhope Posted June 6, 2011 Author Members Report Share Posted June 6, 2011 Deb-I'm so sorry for your loss of you daughter. My son Westley died in his sleep when he was almost 21 years old. That was last year on January 13. It was sudden and unexpected, he was in perfect health (more or less, he had sleep apnea) . He had a couple of beers and took a prescription painkiller, the combination along with the sleep apnea led to his death. It has been 16 months now, and some days are so bad, its like it just happened, but not every day. Coming here in June of last year at about 5 months helped me so much. Mostly I post on the Loss of adult Child thread, there are lots of parents there that have helped me so much, a couple that lost their child due to brain cancer. There are some who lost really young children, but all are welcome, even if your child wasn't quite an adult (at 20 Westley wasn't quite an adult in many ways, and he still lived at home). So I just want to offer you my sympathy in the loss of your daughter and welcome you to the club nobody wants to be a member of. I hope when you are able you can come and share your daughter and her life and death with others who really understand. Peace and hugs to you from someone who feels the pain of loss of a beloved child. Keep the faith, and keep the hope. Its what we have that we can hold on to. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members jdandhope Posted June 6, 2011 Author Members Report Share Posted June 6, 2011 Almost 21, I have a son who is 18 1/2 , just graduated headed to college in the fall. I can imagine him being almost 21... Im sorry for your loss. I dont think age matters much when your child dies it's all out of order. My grandma died 7/13/09, & I was with her through out the night and when she finally let go I was relieved, it was time, she had been stripped of her dignity by dementia. Then 7/29/09 Hope was diagnosed with DIPG, we were shocked, and thrown into a world only nightmares are made of. She lived for another 190 days fighting with courage I didn't know existed, then the last 35 days I watched her stripped of every ability she had, until she died peacefully as we both slept on 3/10/10. Again I felt relief for her but not like I had with my Gram. This time I felt cheated & and anger and despair. My 86 year old father in law died on 2/12/11 with sister in law & I holding his hands urging him on to heaven. Again relief, joy, he left on his own terms having contracted pneumonia and announcing to me & whoever was in the area he was done, he was tired and I quote "this is my last day, I'll be dead by morning". I smile thinking of him saying those things. He woke up several times and asked if he was dead yet, I finally said if you wake up again and see Hope you are dead but if you see me just go back to sleep!For Hope we cried as a family on 3/7 as she managed to get across she was tired, she was ready but still afraid. I can't find any relief, 1 year 2 months 3 weeks & 6 days later. It's just not right! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members shellyku Posted June 6, 2011 Members Report Share Posted June 6, 2011 Dear jdandhope: Hi, my name is shellyku. I am so sorry for the loss of your daughter Hope. What a beautifulname, and I'm sure a beautiful soul. I lost my daughter, Sarah, on August 18, 2010 from leukemia. She was29 years old. She was a school teacher and thought she had a cold or the flu. After about a week of not feelingbetter her doctor recommended blood work for anemia and that's when the diagnosis came. I, like you, justdon't understand why our girls were taken and how we're supposed to go on from here. If you ever need totalk, I am here, as are all the wonderful people on this website. I pray for peace for you and yours, and justknow there are others of us out here on this awful journey. Take Care! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ericasmom Posted July 10, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 10, 2011 shellyku and jdandhope,perhaps you have already shown up in loss of an adult child, I think you have Shellyku, and I hope that you both join our forum there. We are an active group, you needn't learn our names, (we are large) but eventually you will as you post and read. We are that group that others join because we are an active forum. Your child need not have been an adult to join with us. Your ache is what matters, the connections do help on this sad journey. I will promise you both, as I approach the 8th year of Eri leaving, that as you struggle through these phases of grief, you will one day feel strengthened and renewed. It takes time and energy. I wish you both well, give yourself the time you need to find your steps each day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members jdandhope Posted July 10, 2011 Author Members Report Share Posted July 10, 2011 shellyku and jdandhope,perhaps you have already shown up in loss of an adult child, I think you have Shellyku, and I hope that you both join our forum there. We are an active group, you needn't learn our names, (we are large) but eventually you will as you post and read. We are that group that others join because we are an active forum. Your child need not have been an adult to join with us. Your ache is what matters, the connections do help on this sad journey. I will promise you both, as I approach the 8th year of Eri leaving, that as you struggle through these phases of grief, you will one day feel strengthened and renewed. It takes time and energy. I wish you both well, give yourself the time you need to find your steps each day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members jdandhope Posted July 10, 2011 Author Members Report Share Posted July 10, 2011 It is exactly 16 months today since Hope left for heaven. Every event that she should have been at hurts...last night we celebrated our son's graduation & senior recital. Hope should have been there, they should have sung a duet, it would have been her 8th grade promotion party as well. I try to trust that people who know, unfortunately such as yourself, are right but somedays I don't know.Always with Hope in my heartDeb Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members westleysmom Posted July 13, 2011 Members Report Share Posted July 13, 2011 Deb-Today is 18 months since I got that horrible phone call. It seems just like yesterday at times and sometimes its still happening in my mind. I replay the events over and over again and wonder if there is anything I should have done that I didn't or anything I shouldn't have done that I did. I hope that you are doing okay, that's the most I ever hope for anymore, just okay. It is hard to care about anything much, and seems like it doesn't matter one way or the other most of the time. Just wanted to send you a hug and a wish for you to have strength for the day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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